Until The Dark
by Larissa Hyuga
Summary: Simply romance and misunderstandings. A complicated love story wannabe.
1. Until the Dark

UNTIL THE DARK

Songfic about Aoshi and Megumi()

Hey! This is the second fic I post. Actually, I've written many since I was 13( I'm 20 now ), but I was always in the middle of them because it was a personal satisfaction. The first time I knew Aoshi Shinomori was 1997 and it was love at first sight. Now, 2004, I finally got to read all the mangá story(when it was over here in Brazil), and I've been falling in love throughout the years. I thought I'd have to substitute myself for a RK character( I also had to rewrite, and rethink of some things) and I chose Megumi Takani because I find myself reflected on her in many things, and along with Tomoe, she's the female character I like (sorry Kaoru and Misao's fans! ). Who the hell would read a fic of Aoshi and a girl they never heard about(me, me, me!)??? But in fact, I really see Megumi with Sano and Aoshi all alone( coming to me!!!) ok, ok, I am crazy! It's a song fic inspired by Until The Dark, a song of a Norwegian gothic metal band called The Sins Of Thy Beloved recorded on their first album called Lake Of Sorrow .

April,2004.

I don't own nor Ruroni Kenshin characters nor The Sins Of Thy Beloved song rights, I am just a fan, unfortunately!

_Until The Dark_

"Until the dark 

_I'm searching for my love_

_under the stars_

_I'm fading all apart"_

I sit here in this room. It has always been empty, it's been sunny for ages. But night came and it brought stars with it. But the stars also brought who I wanted to be here. The one I make my thoughts for. Under these stars, the usual me is fading all apart and gives birth to the one I want to be.

"_my heart is stolen_

_taken away_

_like they said_

_when I have found_

_as we stay there_

_turn the faith in love"_

How could I imagine I would fall in love with him??? He was so far away! Have I really loved Ken-san or Sano? I was so close to them. But why it had to be him? The others were only a fool thing. This time is different. My eyes, my heart, my feelings... everything was stolen from me! I was stolen from myself! But you are here, and I feel happy for a moment.

"_I see you here_

_with me but I fear the day_

_for you_

_hear my dear"_

You are here by my side! It took ages for you to see you could need someone. I know you're not here completely, but you feel ease to come to me, that's enough for me today. But is everything going to be the same tomorrow? Will you come here to me another day? Will you find your half, or am I the other half that you have to discover?

You make me feel in heaven tonight. For tonight you're mine, only mine! Your eyes are looking into mine. Our lips are sealed with each other's kiss. Your hands are holding me tight. Your soft, cold and pale skin is here to complete mine, as your body is here, taking mine as I offer it to you, only to you. My love, my pleasure. Your pleasure. Your love?

But daytime comes... I watch you over the night, trying to keep you more time here with me. You just get up, you look at me. I hate to see the sunbeams are touching your face, I cannot turn the days into an eternal night. You just look at me. You don't smile. You just look a mysterious look I cannot decipher. You go. When will you come back? Will I ever feel you here again? Will I???

"_I watch the land_

_and the window fallen down_

_I feel the pain_

_inside of me like a cloud_

_no one can save me_

_the time will come for my death_

I think of you and wish me into an another life" 

I am all alone again. Agony days I've passed without you. I don't know where you are! I don't know what you feel! You're a mystery to me. I am in despair. I just sit and watch the path through the window. I have illusions you're coming. I cannot work, I cannot smile, I cannot be happy again. Have you met someone else? Are you still coming to me? It hurts me deeply, my love. It hurts me so deep! You're the one that can save me. Your words, your sad look. Your coldness. I feel I am dying. I cannot stand. It was a lie to think it was enough for me that day. It was enough that day. Not anymore. I need more. I love you more than just for one night. I wish I could be someone who would be by your side always. Even if you didn't want to. Can I be? Can I feel? I can just imagine...

"_I see you here with me_

_but I fear the day for you"_

I just imagine once again, you are here with me. I rejoice in thinking. I feed myself on imaginations. But there's always the fear... always that fear...

"_I see you here with me_

_but I fear the dead_

_for you, hear my dear_

_I see you here with me_

_but I fear the day for you_

_feel my tears."_

You're back once again. And I am here ready for you. Love me, love me... I let myself be loved every single moment. Let yourself be loved too.

But I remember you'll soon be gone. I fear the dead, your deads... I fear the ones who are still alive because they are always taking you away... away from me.

But I love you so much. Oh.... I do...yes, desperatedely... my dear...I love you so much... the hallucinated rhythm of my body, the crazy rhythm of my thoughts, the unconscious rhythm of my love for you...

Although I die everyday, the remembrances of tonight will make me live until the dark, until the next dark day you'll come to me again. Feel my tears... of love, of pleasure, of pain. My tears for you. You, my dear.

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

I hope you liked this one! I am also posting right now another fic of the same couple: Aoshi and Megumi in the same circumstances above( for I love Aoshi!). The next one is also a songfic and its title is Our Prisons. I'd be very pleased to read your comments about this one and the other!!!! Thanks a lot!

PS: This is my favorite The Sins Of Thy Beloved song, and I hope more people know it. If you don't, I hope you could like the lyrics and listen to the song one day( it pleases gothic metal lovers as well as non-gothic/ metal/rock listeners). This is also my favorite Aoshi/Megumi fic I posted.


	2. The Heartless

Chapter II  
  
Continuing the songfic Until the Dark with another songfic. I don't own nor Ruroni Kenshin characters nor the song rights. The Heartless-HIM [Composed and lyrics by Valo]- in the album: Greatest Love songs, Vol. 666 (1997) The Heartless "Your pain ain't love"  
  
And I woke up the next morning after crying for him, dying for him, rejoicing with him. But where was he now? He left without saying a word, he left while I was still sleeping. No signs, not even a little letter. It'd seem he hadn't come here yester night if it were not for the messed sheets and some marks on my body. Why does he do this kind of things to me? Why? Can't he realize he hurts me? Or does he do everything to hurt me more?  
  
"Can't you see he's the heartless Your pain is not love He's taking it too far Don't you know it is wrong"  
  
Oh, Aoshi... who knows of you and me? I had nobody to tell, I feel ashamed to tell my situation. But Kaoru knows it. I developed a strange friendship with her and I believe she'll keep my secret. She's been a good friend, though. And she tells me it's not worthy of. You're heartless, you're taking too far with me, hurting me the way you do. I know it's not right, but I can't help. I'm too weak. But in my weakness, I start to think if I should stop all this pain. Would I be free or would I just create a new and worse pain to live in? Your absence hurts, the lack of your love for me hurts. I don't really beg it for me, but it would be good if you'd me treat right for you know my feelings. And you know I never bothered you to love me the way I do. Somehow, I feel used. I knew I'd be, but not in this bad way.  
  
"You're the one for me You're the one If you'd only see in my heart You'd know all is not lost"  
  
If you could be a bit gentle. If this fire could be a little tamed. You can read my thoughts, so why do you ignore them? Am I not worth of a simple word?  
  
"Your time is running out And you still haven't made up your mind Can't you see he's the heartless And you're one of a kind"  
  
I think all of the advices she gave to me in the past, I remember them all now. I am getting older and I am all alone. Do I really want to pass my live through an affair? Just an affair, nothing more precise, nothing stronger. And if he tires of me, I'll be kicked out of his life. If he finds his love, I'll be sent out of his way. He's heartless to me.  
  
"He's the heartless can't you see he's the heartless Your pain won't ever be love It doesn't matter how hard you try To you all is lost He's the heartless"  
  
Will he come back? I have to take some courage! I ought to talk to him about this situation. It's almost unbearable to me. Is everything lost? My heartless... has he ever been mine for a second? My heartless...what if he just walk away and never come back again? I am thinking of all of this now, but at least, for some moments, I can feel he's mine and he can't deny it because I feel it. I see in his eyes when he loves me, he's mine. He's with me, with my body, reading my thoughts... the light on his iced-eyes reflecting me. I have to be courageous... I'll talk to him the next time... No! Not the next time! Let's see how he'll react ,then, I'll talk to him... some other day... yes, later, when I cannot bear it anymore. 


	3. The Kiss Prelude

Chapter III  
  
Another song fic continuing two previous songfics. I don't own not Ruroni Kenshin nor the songs rights. The Kiss- lyrics and music by The Sins Of Thy Beloved. Taken from the album Lake of Sorrow.  
  
*In my life  
  
that's been taken  
  
I can feel you burn.  
  
in my life  
  
that's been taken  
  
I can feel you burn*  
  
Ok... maybe I am a maniac. It's been three months without him now. It's been three months since the day he hurt me so, going away like a fugitive. I think those reflections made me a bit better, I am a bit more optimist now. I've also talked to Kaoru and she still thinks he's a heartless, that he does not deserves my love. But she also thinks I am too attached to him and that's going to be difficult for me to leave everything behind. Actually, I don't really mean to leave him behind. I know I was too angry and hurt that day I thought of this kind of things. But time's passed and I am calmer, I can now discern it correctly.  
  
He rules me absolutely. He does. And I realized it when a young man brought me a message of his, it was two days ago. He didn't forget about me. He didn't forget about me. The message was short, but it was written "I didn't forget today's your birthday. Shinomori Aoshi". Those words meant the world to me! They made me remember the great love I hold inside.  
  
*She lies on the ground  
  
'til her soul's arised;  
  
lost in vain, away.  
  
In her hand she holds her luck and  
  
a memory of feelings impress you*  
  
I stay quiet, filling myself with the remembrances of "our" love. I hold the message near my heart, I close my eyes and I see time coming back to me, I feel feelings coming back to me, I see you coming back to me.  
  
*All memories are good since you revealed me  
  
the looking of my heart.  
  
for the lost have I complained  
  
since you left me  
  
all alone.  
  
but these memories are good  
  
if I think about you.  
  
I can see them and I like them.  
  
have I lost them in my life?  
  
how I did you?  
  
can I die?*  
  
The dagger you once offered me. All the bad moments I lived in that mansion were made better by your presence, even though you didn't notice me. But I have been loving you, my dear, for a long long time. I remember you coming and going into the mansion, altive and cold, passing by me, filling my mind with your presence. You didn't know exactly I existed, did you?  
  
But we were put apart after that. The gift you gave me, I carried it with me. You went away from there, full of grief and I could do nothing to put it apart.  
  
I remember when you first touched me. You threatened me in a cold and sweet way. That time, my feelings were scrambled and I didn't know I still had feelings for you . But when I saw your semblance, when I felt your hand touching my face, when I heard your voice, I felt everything awaking. I was shocked.  
  
But then, you went away, I was all alone.  
  
Months passed and I tried to take you away from my heart. I tried to fall in love with others, but I could just fool myself a bit. Kenshin-san... Sano... (laughs). At the end of everything, me and you were put face to face again and you were so different. You're calmer than before. Anyway, I was there as a doctor to heal your wounds. And I could not think of such a pleasant job. I was really in touch with you for the first time in my life. You could see I existed. I had the chance to let you see a bit of my feelings and I could know you better. We even became friendly. Wonderful times...  
  
But we had to follow our ways after the storm. You and the girl left the same day I did, although you decided to leave in the morning. We both had lives to carry on.  
  
You went back to yours in Kyoto, I went back to look for my relatives.  
  
But you're not to be a no-motion person. You got another job, in the government and this made you travel throughout the country and to other countries frequently. I didn't find what I was looking for. I decided to go back to Tokyo and it was there we met again.  
  
I was surprised to see you there, I didn't much about you. but, fortunately, we were always meeting at Ken-san's place, or, when passing by, you used to come here to see a doctor.  
  
*Hear me my love  
  
Remember me as I was  
  
Time will come  
  
When we will meet again  
  
I'm still with you  
  
In your mind in your thoughts  
  
We will meet again my real love*  
  
"We'll meet again, my real love" I was speaking to myself...  
  
..........................................................................  
..................................................  
  
I got lost in my memories... it's so late! I ended up sleeping... I didn't see you arrived. You woke me up. There's no better way to be woken up.  
  
"I am sorry, Aoshi-sama! I didn't see you were coming. I didn't know you were coming, you didn't mention it on the message!" He saw I still had the paper in my hands. "There's nothing to be sorry for."  
  
"Hum... would you like some tea, Aoshi-sama? I've got some herbs here and it'd be a pleasure to prepare you some tea."  
  
"Yes, please."  
  
I went to prepare the tea. He was there sat on the tatami. I could see him from where I was. He seemed tired. Maybe he'd been working a lot. Who knows??? I put the tea cup on a tray and took it to him.  
  
"Here you are, Aoshi-sama. I hope it pleases you."  
  
"Hum... yes, it's a nice warm tea, Megumi."  
  
I was very happy he'd been back. I thought he was fed up with me and that he had just abandoned me; I thought he meant to hurt me. Maybe I was wrong, he came here again to see me and his face does not show any bad feeling towards me. I was very happy he appreciated my tea. I was there just watching him, his beautiful face, those mysterious blue eyes veiled by the black bangs...  
  
"Megumi."  
  
"Yes, Aoshi-sama." he brought me back to real world.  
  
"I have something for you. It's for your birthday."  
  
He gave me a rather big package I hadn't seen till that time. I happily and timidly opened it. A gift. A beautiful and expensive red kimono embroided with white flowers.  
  
"Oh, Aoshi-sama. Thank thee so much!!!! I loved it! Thanks, thanks, thanks. But it was not really needed to bother because of me. Aoshi-sama shouldn't have..."  
  
"No, don't say it. It's good you got happy. I thought you'd like my gift. It's also a way to compensate your company and your other 2 birthdays past."  
  
"Thanks a lot again. Aoshi-sama." I said putting the kimono in front of my body and dancing with it, then folding it and placing it over the undone package. "You look tired, Aoshi-sama. Would you like some massage?"  
  
"Yes, it sounds good. I am really tired."  
  
I knew it. I could see he was tired. I placed myself behind him and gently took off his inner shirt( he had already taken the trench coat when entering the house ). His precious skin. I ran my fingers through his back, pressing it firmly, rubbing...he moaned... I was drowning into my remembrances once again.  
  
*remember all things we've done.  
  
and all the times we made love.  
  
remember the night when we talked  
  
and you kissed me,  
  
so we made love all night.*  
  
And more than two years ago, I decided to let you know about my feelings. You were passing by here and you came to visit your previous doctor friend. I remember serving you tea. I remember massaging your back as a doctor. Then, as your doctor, I remember talking to you. We went outside, to the garden. I remember you looking to the sky, thinking of something. I was looking at you and finding myself very in love. Then, in a glance, I decided to say. You said you're going to an inn, you'd be back to Kyoto next morning. You entered to take your trench coat and I followed you. We were alone into my house. That was the time to say something I had been hiding for so long. You turned to me when I called your name. Yes, I said I loved you from a long time and I was still in love with you. I knew you didn't have someone and that I needed you very much. I also told you I was there for you and I'd always be. I was there offering myself to you without asking anything in change. You looked confused, maybe surprised. "You don't have to love me, Aoshi-sama, just fill my days with your presence". Deep cutting silence. Your eyes stuck. My eyes, my voice, my body trembling. No reaction of yours... "Oh, I said trying to hide my tears, I am a fool, I am sor..." you didn't let me end the sentence. You pulled me closer and kissed me gently and vigorously. I could not believe. Aoshi-sama was kissing me! I let go of you. Facing you, I untied my kimono and opened it. I was afraid you'd refuse me, but that time I thought I should do that. I just followed my instincts, not very reputable instincts, but I don't regret and I'll never do. You told me :"I want you like this, Megumi.". You wanted me, my dear... you wanted me as your lover. Nothing could please me more in the world. You made my kimono slip through my body, revealing it naked. I was so nervous, my shaking hands helped you to be free from your clothes... I remember each kiss, each caress, each tear I cried, each tear you wiped from my face. My beloved Aoshi. You were mine that night for the first time. And I had been yours for a long time before it.  
  
*in my life that's been taken away,  
  
I feel your heart,  
  
I feel your breath,  
  
your touch and your kiss.  
  
in my life that's been taken away,  
  
I feel my life,  
  
I can feel your breath,  
  
your touch and kiss.*  
  
That was a long night. Not me nor you imagined it would end that way. I could not sleep then. I just lied and watched you sleeping calmly, hearing your heartbeats, your breath on my face, on my hair. I repeated to myself I could not believe you had accepted my love. I was feeling so nice.  
  
I watched your sleep through that night. When the sun rose, I stood up, bathed myself and prepared the breakfast without taking my eyes of you. You woke up and I was there to serve your breakfast. Then, I dressed you with tears in my eyes. I knew you'd be leaving soon. I would take you to the door, but you told me to check if there was someone outside. You told me it wouldn't be good to me if you were seen leaving my house early in the morning. So, I asked you to stay for lunch. I knew you had to travel that day, but I told you we could have lunch earlier. You agreed. I told you you could bathe yourself while I would set the house. It was strange you didn't say a word about what we did the previous night, and I was afraid and ashamed to ask.  
  
We had lunch earlier, as I promised. After that, you turned to me and you started saying my name:  
  
"Megumi...I..."  
  
"No, Aoshi-sama, you don't need to say anything. I understand. I offered myself to you and I'll take the consequences. I told you I loved you very much and I understand you don't love me the way I do."  
  
"But, Megumi..."  
  
"That's ok to me. You have no obligation with me. My love's enough for both of us and it pleases me to know you consider me."  
  
"Indeed, I think you are a good person..."  
  
"I know, it lets me happy. As I told you, you don't need to love me. I'll always be here for you whenever you can come to me, I'll be waiting. Whenever you want me, I'll be here, so, just come. I'll understand if you don't come again or if you come again and stop coming after some time. If you find a person to love, I'll understand too. I don't want to force you and I won't force you to do anything."  
  
"Aa."  
  
I smiled to him, held him and kissed him. He corresponded me in the kiss.  
  
"Does it mean I'll have you at least once more in my arms?"  
  
"Yes... he answered sharply but timidly."  
  
"So, let's do something. Whenever you come and correspond to my kiss, to my hugs, to my look, I'll know you'll keep on coming."  
  
"Yes."  
  
"I love you, Aoshi-sama."  
  
"I'll see you soon, Megumi."  
  
So, he walked away that time and he returned to me many other times... but I also remember being alone, suffering, waiting and rejoicing when he turned to me again. Like today.  
  
*oh, this love is so for real  
  
come and touch me here my dear  
  
I cannot be without you my dear  
  
my way to you  
  
forever*  
  
"Aoshi-sama?"  
  
"Yes, Megumi."  
  
"I've been remembering many things lately."  
  
"Like what?"  
  
"Like when we decided to meet here, when you took me as your woman."  
  
I could not see his face. I was behind him. But I wished to death I could.  
  
"Megumi, you never asked me to love you... and I..."  
  
"I know... and I am not asking it now... it's that the last time you came here, you went away without talking to me. It hurt me deeply, I can't deny it. I felt dirty and used. I felt really bad. I thought you would not come back: that it was our farewell. I never asked you to love me, but I'll be very honest with you now, Asohi-sama. That time, I wish you could have treated me better..."  
  
"But I didn't know it would hurt so much. I just left. I didn't want to wake you up, you were sleeping deeply and you seemed tired. My apologies..."  
  
"Ok... it does not matter now... you came back to me in a nice way today. I am happy."  
  
He dragged me near him and held me.  
  
"I feel good you feel happy with me. You're very kind, a great woman and I'd be dishonored if I hurt you."  
  
"Aoshi-sama..."  
  
My heart was jumping... he had never spoken such words to me before... he liked me. I held him tighter.  
  
"You're the world to me, Aoshi-sama."  
  
"My dear...Megumi"  
  
He had never called me "my dear" before... I could not believe he had just said those words. Then we kissed and I felt a different power in that kiss. Maybe the missing him made me feel that, maybe it was because of the words I've just heard. I just know it was different. The best kiss I ever felt on my lips.  
  
"I see you're mine again, Aoshi-sama."  
  
"Yes, Megumi. Somehow, over these two years, I'd never been yours as I am now. My body and spirit are here."  
  
"So, do you like being with me?"  
  
"You know I do."  
  
"Oh, Aoshi-sama... nothing could make me happier in the world!"  
  
............................................................................ ............  
  
But that night, he could not stay. Exactly that night, when I was the happiest being on Earth.  
...  
  
------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Hello! Here comes another chapter. I got surprised because it was supposed to be only one little songfic and it became a big one with many songfics(I am addicted to music... music is my inspiration always. I really think a nice scene has to have a song in the background). Read and review, please!!!! 


	4. Fear And Wonder

Chapter IV I don't own Ruroni Kenshin or the songs rights. Inspired by the instrumental song "Fear And Wonder" by Dimmu Borgir. Actually, the song is on the background of the scene. OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speak.  
  
But that night, he could not stay. Exactly that night, when I was the happiest being on Earth.  
  
"Megumi... I have to go now."  
  
"What??? Why??? It's not even morning! It's not even dawn!"  
  
"I came here to say goodbye."  
  
I shook completely. Goodbye? What was happening? He put me apart and stood up. I was still sat.  
  
"Goodbye, Aoshi-sama??? I don't understand! Why? Why are you doing this with me now after saying those words I took two years to hear from you? I thought you'd be here with me... you said you liked being here, you said you liked me."  
  
"Yes, I do. I like being here with you. And that's because I like you I came here to say goodbye. It would have been easier going away without coming here. You'd never know... but I needed to be fair with you, I told you I'd have no honor if I'd hurt you. And I don't mean to hurt you."  
  
"But you do... you hurt me when you say you're going away. After three months without you, you come and you are gentle, you're kind, you're lovely to me. I get extremely happy. Then, you come and say you have to go right when things were becoming better."  
  
"I am sorry, but I have to, Megumi."  
  
"But why did it have to be now?"  
  
His voice was tense. He was looking to the ground. I could not try to guess what he was going through. "I hope you understand someday, Megumi."  
  
"Understand what? That you are abandoning me? I told you I would, but this is almost supernatural to me right now. So, thinking better, I guess we shouldn't have started this."  
  
"Don't say such a thing. I am not abandoning you. I am not really sure if I'll be coming back to you again."  
  
"Isn't it the same, Aoshi-sama?"  
"No, it is not. I understand you don't know. Only people from the  
government know about this. But, I guess I'll have to tell you now." Suspense. He sat down on the tatami again, closed his eyes. I could realize a sigh. I was apprehensive.  
  
"There's a battle in Hokkaido.  
  
"Really?" "Yes, almost no one knows about it. The government wants to keep it in secret. Anyway, the police and the army were sent there. They tried to contact Oniwabanshuu, but the organization has no conditions of fighting right now. As the Okashira, I chose to represent it. Anyway, I was going to Hokkaido one way or another. Saitou is on his way with the policemen. I am also going as a government man."  
  
"Are you going to take long?" "I don't know... the battles have been changing lately. I'll have to stay as long as the battle lasts for the government...or until I die into it."  
  
He said these words with no emotion. I exploded. "But you're not going to die! You're Shinomori Aoshi, the Okashira of Onmitsu Oniwabanshuu! "  
  
"Feh...it doesn't matter, Megumi..."  
  
"Yes, it does matter!"  
  
"They have guns, they don't really fight with swords... cowards- he had that terrible black shade on his face. Guilt, regret, mixed, strong and bad emotions."  
  
"But Aoshi, you're superior. You lived until now. You showed everybody what you're made of."  
  
"I lived until now because they died for me. They put themselves in front of the bullets"- he squeezed the fabric of his pants.  
  
"They did it because they loved you, Aoshi-sama. Because they knew you're good."  
  
"I am not good, Megumi. I couldn't save their lives... I lost to Himura..."  
  
"And you'll lose again if you keep on talking like this, Aoshi!!! And this time, you'll lose your life! The enemy won't see beyond you like Ken-san did!!!"  
  
It was the first time I didn't call him Aoshi-sama. He looked at my face. There was a shade on his eyes... "Aoshi-sama, you've through much pain, I know. But at the end, you found your answers. Ken-san had to find his answers... when a man finds the answer he's been looking for, he becomes invincible. Remember?"  
"Megumi..."  
  
"I trust in you, my beloved. You won't lose. You may lose your life, but  
you didn't lose yourself, you didn't lose your soul nor your beliefs.  
You're superior, Aoshi-sama. You've got your precious answers! How many  
man can achieve what you did? Losing one's life is not the worst thing  
that may happen. Sometimes, it's even luck that tells who lives and who  
dies..."  
  
"Yes, you're right, Megumi. My dear friends died for me. Misao is always  
fighting with people because of me. Okina believed in me even when he  
thought I had sold my soul to the Devil. Himura made me see I was wrong  
and because of this, I had the chance to find my truth. And there's you,  
Megumi, who's been always here for me, no matter what happens."  
  
"Yes, my beloved. Go there and show us all you're a winner, that we were  
not wrong in believing, in seeing beyond." He held my hands and kissed them. He spent some time looking at me. Aoshi-sama took his coat, his two kodachi and walked to the door. I followed him. "May you be blessed, Aoshi-sama."  
  
"Thank you, Megumi.- he put his hands on my shoulder- Please, keep this in your mind: if something unexpected happens, choose a decent man, marry him and be happy."  
  
I could not answer. I just nodded. He kissed me and then, turned his back to me. He went out. I kept myself standing at the doorway, watching him go. He didn't look behind. It was good he didn't. I was crying a lot, I was even good in holding my cry until he was gone. Somehow, I felt I was important to him and I didn't want him to think I was crying for his death or something like this. I watched him until I could not see him anymore. Then, I entered the house. The tea cup he drank from was empty on the tray. The gift he gave me was folded right on where I had left it. I took it, folded properly and I was going to pack it again when I saw there was a small piece of paper into the package. I took it and I read. Aoshi-sama hadn't said goodbye to people from Kyoto. They knew nothing about it! He only said goodbye to me. Exactly like Ken-san did three years ago with Kaoru. But did it have the same meaning?  
  
"Megumi, Megumi. What should you do???? Should you go to Kyoto and tell them? What would they think and feel about Aoshi-sama? How could he just disappear? Did Aoshi-sama think the same thing of Ken-san when he decided not to tell them? But, they'd surely suffer a lot like I would suffer with his missing if he hadn't come here."  
  
I slept thinking of this.  
  
This is a little chapter I wrote and it's more dramatic than the others. Ok, now, I'll be changing a bit the story... I hope you like! Till next chapter ( what song will be playing on the background????) 


	5. Butterflies And Hurricanes

Chapter V I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters nor the songs rights! Soundtrack of this chapter: Butterflies and Hurricanes by Muse. OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speak.  
  
Knock, knock, knock...  
  
"Hum... I mumbled."  
  
Knock, knock, knock...  
  
"No... I don't want to wake up. You're dreaming Megumi... go to sleep, your eyes are sore, you're tired...hum... yes, yes, yes...sleep..."I was talking to myself.  
  
Knock, knock, knock...  
  
"Sleep, Megumi-chan, sleep..."  
  
(Silence)  
  
"Yes, good people, they gave up... let Megumi-chan sleep." CRASH!!! "What? What the hell is going on here????????" I just jumped, screaming.  
  
"Surprise, Megumi!" "Hello, Fox Lady!" "Oro...Megumi!" "Hello!"  
  
I saw Kaoru carrying Kenji, Sanosuke, Ken-san and Yahiko.  
  
"WOW! Don't you knock anymore?????" – I was visibly angry, taking a decent kimono to cover my body.  
  
"Well, we did... but the sleeping fox didn't come, so... we had to enter anyway. I could see the pieces of the front door on the floor..."  
  
"What???? Who was the monster who did this to my door???? They looked at each other."  
  
"Grrrr... Rooster head, you bastard, I'll kill you!!!!" "Calm down, Fox Lady!!!! How did you guess it was me??? I was only doing Kaoru a favor. She told today's your birthday...getting older, uh???"  
  
"It' not my birthday today!!!!!"  
  
"Come on, foxy!!! You don't need to be ashamed... everybody gets old one day..."  
  
"My birthday was three days ago!!!!"  
  
"Kaoru, what kind of friend are you? How could you forget your friend's birthday???"  
  
"But Kaoru, Kenshin and Kenji did come here on my birthday!!! What's this all about???" Groan...  
  
"Err... Megumi!!!!" Only then I decided to pay attention to what Kaoru was saying. She was holding a basket.  
  
"Kaoru!!! I never thought you could do..."  
  
"Calm down, Megumi!!!! It's such a beautiful day, look! Butterflies, birds, flowers, sun..."  
  
"And an angry Fox Lady"!- Sano and Yahiko were laughing to death.  
  
"Sano!!!! Yahiko!!!!"  
  
"Oops, Sorry, ma'am!"  
  
"We think you've been alone, Megumi. So, Mrs. Kaoru decided that we should come and visit you."- a smiley Ken-san replied.  
  
"Hum...why, then? Why didn't you tell me you were coming? Why did you need to break through my house?"  
  
"We understand you're angry and scared, but we just wanted to check if everything was ok with you Megumi... if you had slept well... these things..."- Kaoru was saying while peeping around the house.  
  
"I guess we are bothering you, Miss Megumi...let's go, Kaoru. Miss Megumi is safe, alive and angry"-said Yahiko.  
  
I was being too aggressive with them... where were my manners???  
  
"Ok... don't mind, right? Is that you woke me up in an abrupt way... tell me someone who can be calm when they have the front door destroyed...  
  
"Yes, Megumi, you're right. Summate."  
  
"How's everybody? Kaoru? Ken-san? Rooster head? Yahiko? Kenji!!!" I was trying to smile and be sympathic.  
  
"I am relie...really nice, Megumi!" Ken-san's smile told me everything about him.  
  
"Nice, fox lady..."  
  
"Have you been destroying other parts of your body lately??? I told you I'm not repairing them again, uh???"  
  
"Hehe..."  
  
"You seem to be stronger,Yahiko."  
  
"Do you think so???? See, Kaoru, she's a wise woman..."  
  
"Kenji, come with aunt Megumi!!!!" The little boy came walking to my arms...  
  
"I brought some food for us all to take breakfast together!!! And this time, it was not Kenshin who prepared it, I did it all by myself!!!!" Kaoru said sounding very happy.  
  
"Really?" I was surprised  
  
"Do you believe she insisted to bring food? I told her you had food in your house, but she didn't change her mind (sigh)..."  
  
Yahiko was almost crying... Kenshin had no eyes... Sano was making faces and gestures I could not decipher...  
  
"Well, let's have breakfast, then. I baked some cakes yesterday."  
  
"Hum... how nice, ne, Yahiko????"  
  
"What do you mean, Sanosuke? That you are just eating the cakes???? You..." Kaoru was really angry now.  
  
"It seems everything is the same"- I smiled.  
  
Me and Kaoru were setting the table, putting the food she prepared, the cakes I did and fresh tea I prepared.  
  
"What about a loaf, Kenshin?" –Kaoru offered  
  
"Thanks, but this cake Miss Megumi baked has already filled this servant's stomach, Kaoru." "Sano?"  
  
"I've eaten the loafs already, Kaoru, I swear" he said under a suspicious look she gave him.  
  
"Yahiko, you never eat so little..."  
  
"Aaaa, it's that today I have some stomach problems, Kaoru... but I guess Kenji is just starving."  
  
"What's this, Yahiko, you want to see the poor boy dead???" Sano said out loud.  
  
"Grrrrrrrrr..." Kaoru was irritates, then she turned to me with begging eyes- "Megumi???"  
  
I had no choice... Kaoru cooks terribly!!!  
  
"Err... ok, Kaoru..."  
  
"Kaoru you wanted to check if Fox lady was alive or did you come here to kill her yourself?"  
  
"Sano..."  
  
"Why checking if I was alive???"  
  
"Aoshi went at the dojo yesterday, talked to Kenshin. Then, Kenshin talked to Kaoru. Since then, they decided to come and check if you were ok. I was wondering if Aoshi had become a psycho again and decided to go around killing people. Maybe you could be a victim...hehehe... by the way, you have sore eyes...have you been crying, fox lady?"  
  
"Funny, rooster head... no, I was sleeping when you arrived, did you forget???"  
  
I opened my eyes wide and looked to Kaoru... she was embarrassed.  
  
"I will make some more tea" she said and went out.  
  
"I'll help you out" I followed.  
  
At the kitchen, I got closer to her. I was kind of furious, scared and surprised.  
  
"You told them" I whispered harder than the normal.  
  
"No, Megumi... I didn't! I just told Kenshin. And I told him yesterday. Aoshi asked him to watch over you and people from Aoy-ia. He told Kenshin he'd go on a mission. It was obvious why he asked him to watch over people from Kyoto, but what about you? Kenshin asked me and I thought it would be good if I told him. Yahiko and Sano came because they were there at home and they are not that easy to fool, they would bother so much that they would end up discovering everything. So, it was better if we made up a story about you being all alone all the time and come here to see you. I feared for you, Megumi. I didn't know how you'd react. But I feel in peace you're ok."  
  
"I'm broken inside, but I can't show it to anyone, Kaoru..."  
  
"I see by your eyes you cried a lot, they are so sore. Even Sano realized."  
  
"Are they so bad?"  
  
"Yes..."  
  
"Oh, Kaoru... you don't imagine how I feel..." I covered my face, trying to shed the tears that were coming to my eyes...  
  
"Yes, I know how you feel. Remember when Kenshin left that time? He only told me goodbye and I could do nothing. I just fell into sadness. You're strong, Megumi. You're not like a living dead..."  
  
"Yet, Kaoru... at least on the outlook. You don't know what he told me last night, you don't know how happy I was when he told me all of that. He came here, gave me a birthday gift, said things I had never heard before...all of that because he was going away... he told me he liked me."  
  
"No, Megumi. I could see on his face he was worried. I was wrong... I never thought that man could have feelings, I never understood your relationship with him. I even thought you were crazy... but, according to what I saw and heard yesterday, he does like you."  
  
"How many hours will you two be there???? The tea is already ruined, we can smell it from here!!!" Yahiko shouted from the other door.  
  
"Oh, my!!!!! We just let the herbs burn!!!!!"  
  
Ken-san and the others stepped into the kitchen. Smiling, he said:  
  
"What about a walk around the city???"  
  
"Nice idea, uh, Megumi??? Let's go, let's put some cheer on your face!!!! Guys, take Kenji! We are going to leave on a walk right now!!!"  
  
"Yeah!!! She won't force us eat anything more, Sano!!!!"  
  
"But I'll force you buy me a new front door..." "Oops..." Yes, they were still the same...  
  
To be continued... 


	6. Sä Et Tiedä Mitään

Chapter VI  
  
Wow! My little songfic has tuned into a long story now!!!!  
  
I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters nor the song rights, ok?   
  
Written while Maija Vilkumaa song called "Sä Et Tiedä Mitään" was playing on repeat mode.  
  
OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speak.  
  
The weather was really nice outside. I was looking all around, seeing people! It seemed I has spent hundred years locked inside that house... I was paler than ever, my eyes really hurt with all that light.  
  
Everybody seemed so happy! Children playing, people coming and going. The market was pretty full. Everybody was full of hope. Ken-san and Kaoru were walking together. Yahiko and Sano were finding everything very funny, they couldn't stop laughing a second! I was walking and holding Kenji's hand. Strange, uh? Yes, but I liked that boy! I had developed a strange affection for children lately.  
  
"Let's go to Akabeko's! We can visit Tae and Tsubame!"  
  
"Good! Nice food and nice girls, uh, Yahiko???"  
  
Yahiko just blushed.  
  
We entered Akabeko restaurant. Tae was as smiley as usual. Tsubame was very gorgeous on her new outfit.  
  
We sat to have lunch. It's needless to say we were all hungry for the little we had eaten for breakfast... I was still sitting with Kenji, feeding him...  
  
"Hey, Kaoru, you'll lose your son to Megumi!!!"  
  
"Funny..."  
  
Suddenly, an old woman approached, shaking her skinny arms, smiling:  
  
"Kaoru-chan!!!!!!!"  
  
"Mrs. Toki!!!! Hundred years we don't meet, uh??? Come and share the meal with us!!!!  
  
"Thanks, dear...I am not eating here today, but I'll sit down and chat for a second."  
  
Then, she sat.  
  
"Mrs. Toki was a friend of my mother. She used to be our neighbor when I was a child. Now she lives in Nagano. Her son is a very influent Monarchist."  
  
Sano gasped.  
  
"Yes. Pleased to meet Kaoru's friends. How have you been, then? Married???"  
  
"Yes, yes... He's my husband, Himura Kenshin..."  
  
"Hum... nice, nice. Hum... let me guess, then! I love guessing things! The man with the spiky bang may be a friend or familiar, married with that lovely lady and they are the parents of that little boy over there... but this older boy, I don't know... he's too old to be son of any of yours... where did you find such boy, Kaoru???"  
  
Yahiko wanted to kill the old woman... Sano got away from me in a glance...  
  
"No, Mrs. Toki! The little boy is my baby, Himura Kenji!!! See, he looks like Kenshin!!! He's Sagara Sanosuke, a friend; Myojin Yahiko, my ex- student from Kamyia-Kashin style; Takani Megumi, our doctor friend."  
  
"Hum... interesting... an ex-student from the dojo... a woman doctor and not married... how weird, uh? Sagara...oh! I recognize you now! That vaga...."  
  
Sano was about to explode the old woman with his abilities. I was extremely blushed.  
  
"Mrs. Toki, tell us what brought you back to Tokyo!"  
  
"Oh, no, Kaoru-chan, I have to go back to Nagano now ( she didn't take her eyes out of Sano). I am late. It was good to see you here. I'll visit you next time I come to Tokyo, ok?"  
  
"I'll be just waiting."  
  
"Beautiful family you have. Sayonara." She said out loud. "And bad friends" she whispered eyeing me and Sanosuke.  
  
The old woman finally stood up, bowed and got up. We were all relieved! Kaoru was extremely embarrassed. Sano was fuming, Ken-san had no eyes again, Yahiko had a psycho face and there were some angry fox ears on my head.  
  
"I am sorry, Sano, Yahiko, Megumi..."  
  
"That's ok, Kaoru..."  
  
"But did you know that crazy old thing told some true stuff... like, our fox lady friend... see... she's old and she didn't marry yet...don't you think you are aged, you know, you should already have some brats..."  
  
"Are you proposing her, Sano???" Yahiko said with a very malicious look  
  
"ME?????????? NO WAY!!!!! But it was true wasn't it? Don't you have any will of getting married, having some brats, fox lady... imagine some little foxes at your house... the matter is a husband... who'd want a fox lady? Maybe, if you were a good girl..."  
  
"Hum... indeed the biggest irrefutable truth in all of this was that you're a vagabond!"  
  
"Groan... fox lady! You'll always be a fox lady!"  
  
"Roster head!!!! You'll always be a Sanosuke!!!"  
  
"Come on, you two!!!! Stop fighting. It's said that when two people fight a lot like you two do... hum.... we know you love each other! Megumi is now in love with children... Sano is crazy about some "brats"... why don't you two just ho...  
  
"SHUT UP!!!!!!!!" me and Sano stood up, about to kill that Yahiko brat.  
  
"This servant thinks you're drawing everybody's attention with such fight and subject."  
  
It was true. Everybody was looking at us.  
  
"Yes, let's eat in peace."  
  
"Agreed."  
  
We just finished our lunch. Yahiko decided he'd be there for some more time...  
  
"Hum, barefaced... poor Tsubame.."  
  
"You're needing a girlfriend, Sano!!!! You bother too much with people's affective life."  
  
Then, he just shut up and blushed.  
  
Kaoru and Kenshin decided to buy Kenji some candies. They were walking ahead of me and Sano.  
  
We had been shut then.  
  
"Uh... thanks for the walk, but I guess I have to come back home right now."  
  
"Why, Megumi?"  
  
"It's getting late and maybe there's someone there waiting for my medical care. We never know. But there's a door in my house that needs to be repaired"  
  
Suddenly, I stuck. A familiar face was coming in my direction.  
  
"Megumi-sama! Megumi-sama!!!"  
  
A young boy was coming in my way. I looked at him and I could not believe.  
  
"Yusuke???"  
  
"Yes, Megumi-sama! I am so happy I could meet you here!!! I came looking for you!"  
  
"Looking for me? What's the problem?"  
  
The others were just watching the scene, dumbfounded.  
  
"Oh, I am sorry... he's Yusuke Misaki. When I went back to Aizu, he helped me looking for my relatives. He's a lovely boy and friend."  
  
The boy smiled. He seemed much mature now... he'd just turned 18, I guess.  
  
"But, what are you doing in Tokyo, Yusuke?"  
  
"I came because I want to fight. I am an Imperial Trooper now!"  
  
I lifted my eyebrows.  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes! After my parent's death, I decided to be a soldier. I was sent to Tokyo to receive some training and now I am going to Hokkaido."  
  
He realized the shade that came to my face.  
  
"But there's nothing wrong there. I am just on a typical mission, just to check everything. No wars, nothing!!!!!" he smiled then.  
  
I knew that was confidential.  
  
"You didn't find him, Megumi- sama?"- he said in low voice.  
  
"Yes, I did, but he's far now, Yusuke..."  
  
"Don't worry, Megumi-sama. You won't be alone."- he said looking around- "Well, I just have to go now."  
  
"May you be blessed, Yusuke-san."-I took my luck ribbon strand from my wrist and tied around his.  
  
He looked at me and bowed showing respect.  
  
"Thank you, Megumi-sama. I hope I can see you again someday, and see that you're happy ...(whispered) with your Okashira.  
  
Then, he went away smiling.  
  
"Weird boy... fox lady's friend... 'he's a lovely boy and friend'... boy friend= boyfriend???"  
  
"Come on, Rooster head. What do you think I am??? Are you jealous??? Let's get going... and don't forget about my door!!!!"  
  
............................................................................ ..............  
  
We arrived at my house at the end of the afternoon. Sano was carrying the door.  
  
"As Megumi can't sleep at our dojo today, I'd like to stay here with her."  
  
I looked at Kaoru. I was very surprised.  
  
"Kenshin, take Kenji with you. I'll be back tomorrow morning."  
  
The boy didn't seem to like the idea.  
  
"Ok, Kaoru! Sano, do you need some help fixing the door???"  
  
"No, it's over now. I think I'm going to eat one of these cakes Fox Lady prepared... then I'll go away..."  
  
"Nobody will ever repair you, rooster head!" I said smiling.  
  
"Thank you, Ken-san. Bye, Kenji, dear!!!"  
  
"Sayonara!"  
  
Kenshin went away trying to distract the little boy. It'd be a hard night for them...  
  
"I think I'll take a bath, Megumi. Can you lend me a kimono of yours???"  
  
"Sure, they are just here."- I handed her a pink kimono.  
  
As she left, I turned and saw Sano in the kitchen, eating.  
  
"Do you want some tea? Or maybe some sake?"  
  
"Oh, do you have Sake???"  
  
"Yes, why are you so surprised?"  
  
"It's that I thought ... nothing... I thought you just didn't have!"  
  
"Hum..."  
  
I served him some sake and stood there sat with him.  
  
"Hum... I am full... I'll get going right now."  
  
"Thanks for coming, Sano."  
  
"So, I am not rooster head now, uh?"- He said blinking.  
  
"You're ALWAYS a rooster head. No more salvation!"  
  
"Hehe..."  
  
We walked to the door. He turned to me and said:  
  
"See, the door is nice again. Tell goodbye to Kaoru. And take care of yourself...(he took my hand.pause, he was looking very serious).I know about that maniac-depressive... does he really deser..."  
  
"Uh???"- I was shocked.  
  
"I'm not as idiot as you think I am, Megumi. He doesn't... but you... aaaaa... you're a fox lady! No more salvation, ne??? Sayonara!!!!!"  
  
He just vanished from my front door and I could say nothing.  
  
So, he knew about Aoshi-sama...how???? And what was he trying to say???  
  
To be continued. 


	7. As Shadows Dance

Chapter VII

Wow! My little songfic has tuned into a long story now!!!!

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters nor the song rights, ok?

Written while Theatre Of Tragedy song called "As Shadows Dance" was playing.

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

So, Sanosuke knew about Aoshi-sama...

"Kaoru?"

"Yes" she answered from inside the other room.

"Did you know Sanosuke knew about Aoshi-sama???"

Kaoru appeared on the room I was. She looked surprised.

"What are you saying??? Sanosuke knows about you and Aoshi?

"I suppose so! He told me he knew about the 'maniac-depressive', and that he, Sanosuke, was not as idiot as I thought he was..."

"Very strange, indeed... I guess I'll check things with him later"

I didn't say anything. I was only thinking of that. Somehow, I was worried about Aoshi-sama. That war in Hokkaido...

"Megumi?"

"Yes, Kaoru"

She sat on the tatami.

"What about that boy we met in town?"

"Yusuke? He's a lovely person. He lived in Aizu. Remember when I went back there to look for my relatives?"

"Uhum..." she was paying a lot of attention.

"He was one of the people I first met to help me. He did everything to find my relatives. He was a nice company. The funny thing is that he always wanted to say near me. He had no mother. His father was always working and he had no brothers. So, he used to spend the whole day at my clinic, helping me out in everything."

"And?"- Kaoru had a strange look on her face.

"Come on, Kaoru!!!! Are you having the same dirty thoughts of Sanosuke???"

She blushed...

"No... I... I... just wanted to know the rest of the story!"

"Ok... one day, I went to his house to check why he hadn't shown up at the clinic. He had traveled to Tokyo and I didn't know. When I arrived there, I saw he had some nice pictures from that artist, Sanosuke's friend...I could see Captain Sagara on many pictures... Kenshin, Sano, the artist himself, Shishio and Aoshi-sama... I got very disturbed when I saw Aoshi-sama's picture. Yusuke went to another room to take something and I approached Aoshi-sama's picture. I touched it with my fingers and said his name. Yusuke had just entered the room. He asked me if I knew him... I could not lie. I started crying, believe me. So, I told he was the Okashira of Oniwabanshuu( he already knew it, the history facts, he just didn't knew about the real battle we lived through here in Tokyo) and he realized I was in love with him. I could not deny it, could I?"

"No, Megumi, you couldn't" Kaoru had very vivid eyes looking at me.

"Despite of his young age, he is a very comprehensive and mature boy. So, I opened myself to him. And I told there was someone I loved and that this person didn't mind about me. So, he asked: 'Okashira Shinomori Aoshi???'. Yes, Yusuke was right. Such a sweet boy. He held my hands and told me that Aoshi-sama would love me one day, he knew it. I didn't know what to say. I just remember his pure smile. He hanged Aoshi-sama's picture and he used to like it a lot, just because of me... and he told me he'd do anything to let me happy. Once, he told me he loved me. But he said it was not a selfish love, it was something nice, the wish he had that he could make me happy. That's why he was always helping me, looking for my relatives, being with me when I was all alone. That was his way of making me happy."

"Wow, Megumi... I have no words..."

Then, I remembered of something.

"Kaoru...remember I told Aoshi-sama hadn't said goodbye to people from Kyoto?"

"Yes... and then?"

"I was thinking if I should go there and tell them..."

"And how are you going to explain it to them? Okina will understand it properly, but what about Misao? She'll get crazy!"

"But, Kaoru, they must be very worried about Aoshi-sama! If something happens..."

"Aoshi is a grown up man! He knows what he does. He just wanted to keep them out of it. It's very easy to guess Misao would go after him. She thinks she's very powerful and skilled to fight in these kind of wars, but she's not all of that, you know Megumi!"

I was frustrated...

"That's ok, Kaoru... let's sleep then... I am very tired."

"Ok"

Kaoru laid down, so did I. But I could now sleep. There were many many thoughts on my head and I didn't know how to deal with them. Aoshi-sama, Yusuke, Sanosuke, people from Kyoto...

I feared for two dear people on that damned war... I hope I can have Aoshi-sama and Yusuke safe...

I stood awake, looking the shadows on the paper walls. If one of those shadows could only be...

To Be Continued.


	8. My Immortal

Chapter VIII

Wow! My little songfic has tuned into a long story now!!!!

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters nor the song rights, ok?

Inspired by "My Immortal", by Evanescence (I'm not a FAN, but this song is just in my mind for the whole day) and I started imagining things.

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech. The sentences into refer to the song verses.

I woke up the other day after sleeping just a little, watching the shadows dancing around me. Kaoru seemed to have slept better and she was looking nice that morning.

"So, Megumi, I have to go... it was nice being here with you. You know whatever and whenever you need us, we'll be ready to do it for you. But Kenshin may be having a hard time with Kenji and I'd better run home now."

"Ok, Kaoru, you're really precious. Thanks for everything. Regards to people at the dojo, ok?"

"Yes, and I'll check that thing about Sanosuke... sayonara!"

"Sayonara!"

Kaoru left then. I was lost in my thoughts... I had to do something; I could not let things the way they were...

I was not hungry, I was not feeling anything...

I entered the bath... warm water... nice smell... deep thoughts... oh, I was tired... my body seemed to have fought along the night.

I was gazing the water... the petals... it was my obligation.

"You must, Megumi!"

I was decided.

I packed some things and waited for time to pass. A boy came looking for medical care and I treated him. Then, I put a sign in front of my house telling people I'd be out of town for some days.

After lunch, I was headed to town. I bought the ticket and went into the train... there was only that trip ahead...

And I was back to that city I never thought I could be back in such a short period of time. Kaoru and Ken-san were very used to that, they used to go there every year...

I was hungry now, but I couldn't go there like that. So, I looked for Sae's Shirobeko. It DID look like Akabeko's!!! I entered and I saw a very familiar face.

"Hello. You must be Sae. I am Takani Megumi, from Tokyo, I know your sister Tae, Kamyia Kaoru's friend. Kaoru stood here with you for some time once."

The lady smiled at me.

"Oh, yes... Tae once told me about you, Kaoru's friend, uh? Please be my guest! How can I help you?"

"Oh, I'd like some soba, please..."

"Ok, Miss Megumi, Miss, right?"

I nodded.

"It'll be right here in a second."

The soba came really quickly. I was very hungry. After paying, I asked Sae if she knew of an Inn nearby. She told me to go to Kitsune's Inn, two streets ahead.

I went there and registered as a guest. The room was quite warm and comfortable. It was a pretty cold winter. I kept my things, bathed and got ready to face what I had to do.

I left. Walking a bit more, I could see the restaurant. I entered after taking a deep breath.

"How can I help... MEGUMI!!!!!!"

The smiley young woman came running. She was beautiful. She was not looking that much like a child anymore. Three years had passed since I had last seen her.

"Hello, Misao. How are you doing?"

"I am rather nice, Megumi, if it were not for Aoshi-sama's missing... but you look nice, and you're so beautiful!"

I was ashamed. There was something disturbing me. Maybe it was due to the girl's happy welcome.

"Thank you, Misao. You're more mature now, healthy, happy and strong as always."

"Come on, sit down!!! I'll just call my grandpa!"

Okina just materialized in front of us.

"It's not needed, Misao. I saw Miss Megumi's arrival. Are you still a Miss, uh?

I was ashamed.

"Yes..."

"If only I were younger..."

"Grandpa!!!"

I really blushed. I was feeling out of place in front of those people. They invited me to enter their house that was located behind the restaurant. I did. There, we sat and Misao went to prepare some tea.

"Where are you staying, miss Megumi?"

"At Kitsune's, Okina"

"I'll bring your belongings to here, you're going to be our guest! Misao is going to be very happy with this, so am I and would Aoshi be, if only he were here right now."

My face was burning. It was burning deep since I arrived there.

"It's not needed, Okina, I don't want to disturb you, it's nice for me to be there."

Misao arrived. She had heard everything.

"Oh, Megumi, you must stay here with us!!! It's going to be a pleasure! Your things will be arriving here soon!"

I could not refuse... they really insisted much after that.

"So" Misao asked, "what are you doing here in Kyoto? Just traveling or something?"

I had to tell... I was burning with that, I had to... I couldn't look up at their faces.

"No... actually I came here just to see you."

"Really????? How sweet of yours!!!!" Misao came and held me.

Still, I couldn't look at them. I decided to keep my eyes closed. Kaoru's words were echoing into my head.

Okina was realizing I was not ok.

"Is there something wrong??? You don't seem very nice, miss Megumi... maybe you should rest..."

"No, I am fine... Misao, could you get me some more tea, please?"

"Yes, Megumi!"

Okina turned and said:

"Misao, please take care of miss Megumi's belongings that should be arriving here soon."

"Right, gramps! I'll be right back!"

Misao left the house.

"Ok, miss Megumi, you can speak now." Okina said with a serious face.

"Thanks, Okina. It's going to be much easier for me now that Misao's gone..."

"Is that very difficult for you?"

"Yes, it is..."

I took a deep breath. Okina had narrow eyes now. Silence.

"It's about Aoshi-sama."

"Hum... so, it was really good Misao went away... go on, please."

"Aoshi-sama passed by my house a couple of days ago. I got extremely... surprised. He had gone to Ken-san's place before too. I thought he was there just to visit, that maybe he wanted to talk, a check-up... but that was not the case. He works for the Government now..."

"Yes..." Okina was apprehensive.

"What I am telling you now, cannot be told to anyone, please, Okina."

"Ok, you have my word"

" There's a war happening in Hokkaido and Aoshi-sama went to fight there. It's extremely secret. Nobody besides the government knows about this. I found it very strange that he said..."

I had to stop to breath again.

"He told me he didn't know if he'd be back again. It was very strange to hear such things from him..."

"Indeed." Okina seemed worried.

"The battles are different now, he said. They are using many fire guns and he said it's not easy even for the most skilled swordsman to get rid of all of them all the time. He went there to say goodbye. He hadn't said anything to you because it was easier to him, mainly because Misao would want to follow him and we know she can't endure that much despite of she's a very strong girl, I guess."

"Yes..." he didn't move a muscle.

"But he was different" I had to close my eyes "this time he has no hope, he has no fire for fighting... Aoshi-sama wants to die... he's looking for death in this battle now."

CRASH!

We looked behind. A pale Misao was standing by the door with teary eyes. The teacups were broken on the floor. Unfortunately, she heard what she was not meant to hear.

Okina jumped from where he was sat.

"Misao..."

I could not see that scene.

She left running to her room and locked herself inside... we could hear her cry from the outside...

Okina returned to me. He was very disturbed.

"Miss Megumi, maybe you want to rest now... please follow me to your room."

I nodded.

"I am awfully sorry, Okina, awfully sorry... I didn't..."

"It was not your fault. Misao was not supposed to be hearing that anyway, but you have no fault. But let her cry... it's the only thing we can do, she doesn't accept help."

We passed by a corridor... Misao was crying a lot... I passed through Aoshi-sama's room... my heart jumped... such a sad situation. Two rooms later was my room.

"It's here... I have to leave now... there will be only you and Misao in the house. The others are at the restaurant, if you need something, ask them and feel free to go wherever you want into here..."

"Thank you..." I said with a tremble voice...

Okina left, I laid down...

I'm so tired of being here  
suppressed by all of my childish fears

She was crying out loud. I had regretted going there to destroy her glad days... I was so afraid... I left my room and walked through the corridor. Aoshi-sama's room was there, empty... I entered... I sat on his tatami. Misao's cry was louder from here...

It was a big despair... I started crying too...

And if you have to leave,  
I wish that you would just leave;  
because your presence still lingers here  
and it won't leave me alone

That was torture... I was there into his room, looking at his things, invading his life like that. Everything reminds of him. His presence was intense in there. It made me very dizzy.

"NO, it's not true..."Misao was crying into her room... "Why this? Aoshi-sama, you belong in here with us... with me and gramps, with Oniwabanshuu."

Those words from Misao hurt me deep... yes, his place was there... with them... I had no right to destroy this... I'll always be a ghost; I'll always live with his presence, not with him. What the hell was I imagining when I started all of that? What am I to him indeed? I am no part of his history, of his life, I didn't live with him his growing and all he passed through before... I am just a strange.

These wounds won't seem to heal  
this pain is just too real  
there's just too much that time cannot erase

But this is such a difficult situation... I feel so hurt! Hurt by him, when he went away, hurt by this situation, hurt by the task I had to do in coming here, hurt because I hurt other innocent people, hurt because I don't belong in here... because I am a plain fool...

"That can't be, that can't be!!! You're going to be mine, you can't go like this..." Misao was almost screaming...

I could just close my eyes and feel the cutting edge of that moment... the scars would come and shine vividly.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears  
when you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears  
and I've held your hand through all of these years  
but you still have all of me

I was just a thief...

Misao had the remembrances of when she was little. Aoshi used to take care of her in a very lovely way. No matter what, he was always there for her, caring, cherishing... he was a father, an old brother, the object of her unconditional love. He was the one who taught her the Oniwabanshuu life, not directly, but through Hannya. He used to hold her hand and lead her through the streets to safety, to home... but she grew, he went away. He changed so much...

"I don't have this right," I thought...

I was so weak I had to lie down.

You used to captivate me  
by your resonating light.

But now I'm bound by the life you left behind.

Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams.

Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me

I really shouldn't have done this... I should have followed Kaoru's advice, Aoshi-sama's will. But I am a stubborn fool. I caused this unnecessary pain to that girl. I feel so blamed!!!

And now? Will we live like ghosts??? Will we live like this??? I was spellbound, I couldn't see all of that I should have already seen from the beginning. Blind foolish woman!

She's not crying anymore. I hope she just slept. I wish I could go and check if she's really sleeping, but I have no strength. And Aoshi-sama's smell is fulfilling me, I feel like if I were drugged... it seems I am crazy...

"What is she doing?" Misao thought.

Misao had left her room. She was not crying anymore. She had come to Aoshi-sama's room, but she saw me there. She kept on looking at me. I didn't realize her... she saw I was crying.

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone;

And though you're still with me,

I've been alone all along

"I am just a ghost. I don't belong in here!!! I must..." I was whispering loud.

"I am all alone, my love... all alone" I was crying while holding a paper ball ...

"You're not, Megumi. You have no fault. But..."

I got surprised. Misao was there. Her face had mixed feelings

I turned to her, very scared. I was ashamed I was lying down at Aoshi-sama's room... I just gasped.

Her face was very red. She was confused, angry.

"But what the hell are you doing here??? Who the heck were you calling 'my love'? And what are you doing at Aoshi-sama's holy sleeping place???"

I simply had no words...

"I ... I... am... awfully sorry..." I stood up.

"I hope it's not Aoshi-sama...or..."

"..."

I just walked looking down, when I passed by her, she held my arm.

"It's not your fault. You're a nice person to come here and tell us that. If it were not for you, we'd never know... but you're strange too, Megumi. Why are you crying like this? Who is your love? And what were you doing here? Don't you think it's very outgoing of yours to lay on a man's tatami like that?"

"I don't want to talk about it, Misao."

She let go of me... I entered the room I was supposed to stay.

Some minutes later, I could hear a very big noise. I knew we were alone in the house; Misao was doing something she shouldn't do, maybe...

Yes, she had dressed her Oniwabanshuu costume. I had to go after her.

"Misao."

"No, Megumi" she didn't even turn to me, "I am going! I am strong. I'll help Aoshi-sama! I won't let him die!"

"Misao, you can't" I held her arm.

"Why can't I? I can, Megumi" she was now looking into my eyes, "I can. I know how to fight and I am going after my love! I'll never let my beloved like that... I am not very sure who is the one you love, I want to believe it's not Aoshi-sama, maybe, it's Sano... whoever. I think you shouldn't be just crying you fate. Do something! That's what I am doing."

" Aoshi-sama doesn't want you to go!!! That's why he didn't tell you about that. But he told me because he trusted I wouldn't do such a craziness for him!"

Misao opened her eyes wide. She was the anger in person.

"ARE YOU TELLING ME YOU ALSO LOVE AOSHI-SAMA?"

"No, Misao, I am not telling you anything of that. I am just telling you to be quiet and not disturb Aoshi-sama with your appearance. He doesn't want you into that, I assure you! He wants you here with your grandpa, safe, until he returns."

Misao seemed very disturbed.

"You do, you do..."

Okina entered that moment.

"What's going on here?"

I answered:

"Misao wants to go after Aoshi!!! Isn't that crazy?"

"Indeed!!!! Is that true Misao? I can see it is by your clothes, but I want to hear it from you."

"Gramps, she... she..."

Okina shook his head.

"You have to understand you're going to useless there... or worse... you're going to be a harm."

She didn't say anything... she just turned around, going to her room. When passing by me, she mumbled:

"He belongs in here."

I whispered:

"I know."

She entered her room. Okina came to me.

"I am sorry for that, Miss Megumi... Misao is just crazy for Aoshi... she loses her senses when it comes to him."

"I know Okina... that's ok... uh...I... I ... guess... I'll go now... I'll return home..."

"No, please, stay today with us! Don't bother by Misao's words...she's just a child."

"She's not a child anymore and I know when I lose something. And I lost in here, Okina."

I was going to gather my things. Okina followed me.

"Are you talking about Aoshi?"

I got surprised...

"I read it in your eyes, Miss Megumi."

I couldn't say anything. I had just become mute since I arrived that house.

I gathered my belongings and passed by Okina.

"Thank you for everything, Okina. Say "bye" to Misao, please.

He nodded and watched me go.

Misao was watching me from her window. She was visibly furious. I gazed her and went through the streets.


	9. Priestess Of My Dreams

Chapter IX

Bad thing... seems to have a limit of "..."per story.

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters nor the song rights, ok?

Written while Penumbra song called "Priestess Of my Dreams" was playing .

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

Everything was gray. Winter is very bad in the northernmost part of Japan. But it's a beautiful frame, anyway. He had finally gotten some time out of battles since they started two months ago. Two bloody months.

"Mr. Shinomori Aoshi"

"Yes"

"We've arrived in our final destination. This is the Inn you'll be staying"

"Thanks"

Aoshi left the chariot and stepped on the ground. It was a normal Inn in a normal city. He walked into it. People looked at him. A woman came to take his trench coat. She seemed amused by Aoshi's presence.

"You must be Mr. Shinomori Aoshi, ne?"

"Yes"- he said sharply.

"Mr. Fujita waits for you on that room. Follow me, please."

Aoshi followed the woman to the other room. There seemed to be many people there as their guests. At the end of a hallway, there was a small room decorated with occidental motives. Saitou was in there.

"Here you are. Be my guest if you ever need anything, Mr. Shinomori. And I do mean anything... you know..." The woman said in a very suggestively way.

Aoshi didn't give her attention. He entered the room and closed the door. Saitou was dressed in his habitual costume, smoking...

"How long, uh, Shinomori?"

" Indeed, Saitou"

Saitou lit another cigarette.

"So, the attack is meant to be tonight. Are you ready?"

"Yes"- said Aoshi, while sitting down.

"How many men do you have? It's said the rebels are in great number."

"The last ones arrived from Tokyo today. Now, I have 500 troopers under my command. But it's not only my troop which is going to be there."

"Hum. The spies had brought me some information. You can look if you want."

Saitou handed Aoshi some papers. Aoshi just ran his eyes over them.

" There's nothing here I hadn't known. Did you forget I am a half spy myself, Saitou?"

"Feh... you're well informed...as always"

Aoshi didn't move a muscle. Saitou kept on eyeing the other man...

"So, let's finish this chat here. Maybe we're outnumbered... they also have weapons financed by occidental people. But, let's see. Until the attack."

"Ok, see you there then"

Aoshi left the room. In the middle of the hallway, that woman form the counter was standing.

"Your coat, Mr. Shinomori. Let me take you to your room, please"

Aoshi followed the woman once more. They went up a set of stairs, then, arrived at the bedroom.

"Here."

Suddenly, she turned to him, holding his arm.

"You're a very important and handsome man... if you need company tonight..."

Aoshi didn't even look.

"I don't need this kind of things..."- then, entered the room and closed the door.

"What a pity, what a pity..." she was saying in the outside.

Aoshi entered the room. It was clean and comfortable.

"Nice. I can take a bath and have some peace before everything starts."

He took off his clothes and entered the warm water. Closed his eyes and felt his skin into the warm liquid. That silence made him remember many things.

"Today, after some years, I have a battle... a battle to free me... a battle to show that Oniwabanshuu could have fought in the past... our personal desire... to take the unnecessary from this world..."

Hyottoko... Beshimi... Shikijou...Hannya... he could see their faces reflected on the water.

"Okashira!!!!!"

"Aoshi-sama!!!!!"

Screams.

"We're so proud!"

...

"It's our honor!"

...

"Don't die, please"

...

"I'll kill you myself if you forget your honor."

...

Tears.

...

"Aoshi-sama"

...

" Aoshi-sama, I can't believe! No, Shinomori Aoshi... he's not the Okashira anymore!"

...

Tears.

...

"Find your own answer... this servant knows."

...

"Maniac, depressive"

...

"Our alliance."

...

"You could be big if you wanted to."

...

"Feh."

...

"You don't have to love me."

...

"OKASHIRA! AOSHI-SAMA!"

AH!

Aoshi took a deep breath.He had been semi asleep into the water. Strange thoughts...or were they dreams? They're looking like ghosts to him now... all of them... they were in the water, reflected in a very pale way.

"My only answer is to take them from this world. This is my last battle."

He left the water.

"Then, I shall die."

Without a word, he left the bath and took his clothes. He dressed himself patiently. Then, he took his two kodachis and some belongings he had brought with him. The war could be long... he was waiting for its beginning.

When the time came, he just left the inn and walked alone to where the army should meet for its final mission.

A long battle begun. At first the rebels seemed to know about everything. The police had many problems fighting in town; the policemen could not come to help the army.

Men, once courageous, seemed to be losing grip of themselves.

"I am in charge of a weak army!!!!"

Aoshi was fighting to death. He could not understand. Why were men retreating???

"RETREAT! RETREAT NOW!!!"

"Who is telling them to retreat? I am the commandeer!"

Aoshi made himself visible. There were no men like Oniwabanshuu members. They knew what the words "loyalty" and "courage" meant.

"Don't retreat!!! Let's go on! The battle is not over..."

Aoshi saw men running. He grabbed one by his neck.

"What are you doing? I am the commandeer here! You should follow my orders and die for your country!!!"

"Shinomori-sama, I am sorry, but I have a big family that needs me alive. I have no wife, only four little children. What will be of them if I die?"

Aoshi let go of the man... he didn't know what to do. It hurt him so the fact the men were running from battle. Everything changed so much...he thought he was not a good leader anymore.

"I'll fight alone, I'll go on"

It was a very big mess. Aoshi could not see things clearly under the snow. There were men running, falling all over. He kept on going on, slashing people who came his way. Suddenly, his eyes closed.

It was DARK.

To be continued.

Leila Winters: thank you very much for the tips! And for reviewing, of course! I get very happy when someone reviews here! More angst to come!


	10. Death Is My Comfort

Chapter X

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters nor the song rights, ok?

Written while "The Ninth Gate Theme" form the Ninth Gate Movie Soundtrack was playing.

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

From darkness, a bright light came. He felt a sharp pain on his neck. He opened his eyes and passed the hand around his nape.

"What about the battle? Where am I?"

He looked around. He was into a cave. He saw some cups; his belongings were there too. He heard voices...

"Okashira!!! You're awake!"

A smiley young man was looking at him. He was wearing the army clothes.

"How nice you're ok!"

"You..."

"Oh, I am one of your troopers, Misaki Yusuke, under your orders for one month and twenty one days, Shinomori-sama."

"What am I doing here?"

"Shinomori-sama, Okashira, all survivors from yester battle are here into these caves."

"I should not be here..."

"You wanted to fight, I know... but an iron pot was thrown against your neck, so you fainted, and I brought you here."

"Why?"

"You're our commandeer! You could not die"

Aoshi said nothing. He was too angry to say something. He was not running from battle. He never did.

The young man approached once more.

"Have this, Okashira, please. You must be hungry."

"I don't want... by the way, why do you call me Okashira?"

"Because I know you are the Okashira. I had a painting of yours and others there in my old house in Aizu."

Aoshi shut. Aizu... Megumi...the others... "I am the Okashira"...

"If you need something, let this servant be useful for you, Shinomori-sama."

The boy went out smiling.

"He looked like Seta Soujiro...not so cold inside, but smiley and happy all the time... he used Himura's words 'this servant'... and he's from Aizu. He knows me from a paiting...Okashira... Oniwabanshuu... in a glance, all my past seemed to be brought back to me."

................................................

Aoshi left the cave. Some men were around. It looked like a campsite.

"Oh, Shinomori-sama! You're awake!!!" some men said.

Aoshi had a hard face, a shade on his blue eyes.

The sub-commandeer came running.

"Aoshi-sama!!!! Mr. Fujita is coming only now. We have 106 dead man and 37 are missing"

"Aa".

He left without saying anything else. The sub-commandeer froze.

Aoshi didn't want to see Saitou's face. The police didn't show up last night. Why? Now, they had less then 360 men. Aoshi was roaming...

"Worried, Shinomori?"

Aoshi looked behind and saw Saitou.

"Saitou..."

"I heard of you losses..."

"Men were retreating... I was hit... I don't know how everything happened. You your policemen didn't come..."

Saitou approached.

"We had many problems in the city. Some men tried to run away from prison..."

"It doesn't matter anymore..."

Aoshi turned his back once more to Saitou and disappeared on the snowy field.

"What the hell is Shinomori thinking of?"

Saitou was sure Aoshi was a strange man.

Aoshi spent the rest of the day all alone. He didn't want to eat, he just sat and watched the white meadow. When night came, he took his things and called his men.

"Tonight is the second and decisive night of this battle. It had to be solved yesterday. But... now, you'll have to give everything you have. I don't want to command cowards. Those who fear shouldn't have come..."

The men were shut in respect.

"Then, let's go!"-Aoshi said and went on. The men followed.

Soon, they arrived at the battle field. The battle would begin.

"My last battle..."

The troopers this time seemed to be stronger. They seemed to be fighting for real. But the enemies were not that easy. They had many weapons, many guns, much more than they, the government, could have guessed. Many men were falling for the guns power.

Aoshi was fighting bravely. He didn't want any gun. He was an Onmitsu. His only weapons were his two swords. And he knew he was good. It was the battle that he didn't fight at Bakumatsu. He felt for his comrades who didn't have the chance to fight along with him, as they always did.

Everything was so confusing. He didn't know exactly where things were coming from. The snow helped blindfolding people's eyes. But he had his swords and he was courageous.

"AOSHI-SAMA!!!"

STUMP!

Aoshi saw a body falling in front of him...Misaki...

Misaki Yusuke protected him once more. The young man grabbed his own wrist. Aoshi could see he had been shot on the chest. But that bullet was not for Misaki; it was for him.

"Aoshi-sama... you can't die... I know someone who'd suffer a lot if you died. That person loves you too much to know you're dead. I am sorry, but it was me who hit your nape with that iron pot yesterday."

The boy was shaking and tears were coming to his eyes.

"I couldn't let the Okashira go on... Okashira must live!"

The young man handed Aoshi a ribbon strand he took from his wrist.

"I get happy this bullet hit me, not you. I helped her... I could... help... her. Please give... it... back... to... my... friend... Meguu...mmm" the boy died smiling.

Aoshi took the strand. It was Megumi's...

The boy died to protect him... Megumi's friend... He kept the strand. He stood up and kept on fighting. Now, he had to fight more... more people were counting on him to win... the same of his friends' death at Kanryu's mansion some years ago... people who wanted to die to protect him... was he fortunate or was he just weak?

He fought bravely, till his enemies had perished.

Life seemed to be sparkling into his being again. Once more, at least.

The morning came and Aoshi could see the corpses on the field. The soldiers were gathering them, burying them. Aoshi saw Misaki's... the boy was bloodied...smiling... that disturbed him.

The men came to bury him.

"No. Don't bury him here." Aoshi said.

"He had no family, Shinomori-sama. There's no one to care for his funeral."

"Let it be. I'll take care myself"

The men nodded. Then, they involved Yusuke's body in a blue fabric and took it away to the city. Aoshi followed.

The battle was over then.

"Congratulations, Mr. Shinomori" Saitou said in a deep voice. "Your troops fought bravely."

Aoshi had his back turned to Saitou. He mumbled a distant "thanks".

"So now, you can go back to Kyoto, to your normal life as the Okashira."

"Yes... what about you, Saitou? Will you be back to Tokyo?"

"I am a wolf. I may just wander around."

Saitou lit a cigarette.

They were at the Inn. The Government congratulations had just arrived. It was over. Everything was over.

"Himura asks me about you, Saitou."

"Feh... Battousai. Sometimes I miss those times, Shinomori. But I have no will of going back. He can't fight anymore, he's very injured. I'd rather think of Battousai Himura than Himura Kenshin."

Aoshi was quiet.

The two men eyed each other.

"Well, Shinomori. I have to go. I am staying in Hokkaido for a while. Police need to stay around to certificate things won't turn bad once the Imperial troops leave. Maybe one day our missions can meet again. You're a strong man."

He lifted his hand as if he were supposed to wave.

Saitou left the room walking patiently. Aoshi didn't know what to think that exact moment.

Saitou had his own manners.

What about himself? Shinomori Aoshi.

He intended to die in that battle. But he recovered his pride once more. He couldn't quail. He was taken as a very cold person, but he couldn't deny his will of coming back home for a while. He knew he wouldn't stay too much. His job in the government makes him travel a lot. He rarely has time for the ones he likes.

He packed his things. He decided to take Misaki's belonging with him too. Two months and so many losses. Maybe it was a lifetime and greater losses he could not see at its time. He was really thoughtful. But a feeling that seemed almost anxiety was into him now. He could feel. He was not a demon indeed. Emptiness and anxiety were into him. And there was so much love, many feelings kept away in a pure young heart, something he could not try. A pure young heart.

He walked to the train station. Many troopers were there too. He wanted to take Misaki's body to Tokyo. Misaki cared for Megumi. He didn't know why he was doing that, but that boy would be buried in Tokyo.

Aoshi glanced the city for the last time. He was coming back alive.

To be continued.


	11. Two For Tragedy

Chapter XI- Two For Tragedy.

It's been a long while since I wrote last chapter. But I decided to continue this story for I like it and I had some ideas.

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters nor the song rights, ok?

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

"No! It cannot be!!!"

My face was reflected on the water. I put my hands into the bowl, spilling water. Tears started falling. Doomed discovery.

"It's the second time now. I can't doubt anymore!"

I passed the wet hands on my hair and my body went sliding on the wall until it hit the floor.

I didn't bother being naked in a cold winter day. It was one of the last two weeks of winter but it was pretty cold and white. I could not hold my cry.

"It'll be a problem! Oh, I love him so much but I know him so little."

I was really lost.

I woke up feeling bad that morning. I spent the whole day in bed. I had lost track of time. I had been feeling bad since I returned from Kyoto. Misao was not going out of my mind.

It's been almost two months since I went there. Since then, I've been in touch with Okina, I 'm very worried about Misao although she may hate me by now. But, fortunately, Misao didn't know where to look for Aoshi-sama and she decided to settle down. Okina told me she was very jealous of me. I imagined so. Maybe it's one of the reasons she didn't want to risk and go after Aoshi-sama.

I had been very lonely these two months. Kaoru got mad at me when she discovered I had gone to Kyoto. And she got even madder when I returned and told her what had happened.

Kaoru had been very busy lately, Kenji is growing and giving her and Kenshin much trouble. Yahiko is back to their house, he's living there again and it let everybody very happy. Sano was also back for good to their house. Everything seemed so wonderful!

I was not leaving home frequently. I had been feeling bad. They come here usually. Mainly Kaoru and Sanosuke. By the way, Kaoru checked how Sanosuke found out about Aoshi-sama and me. He had been spying over me!

I was very sad because I knew something that shouldn't be happening with me was happening indeed. At first, I could not believe. Seeing me very down, Kaoru asked me what was happening. I told her what I suspected and she thought it was pretty obvious. Yes, it was... and as a doctor I shouldn't be so surprised. But I was. I didn't know what to do. My health state just seemed to be worse! And I didn't want to look for help.

Sanosuke was always around. He wanted to know if I needed something. Sometimes he'd go shopping for me because I had no will of leaving home.

Once I overheard he and Kaoru saying I needed help. He didn't have an idea of what was really going on.

But they didn't know how hard was that scene. They didn't know what to be an intruder was. I knew. I was an intruder into Asohi-sama's life.

"He belongs in here."

Misao's sentence wouldn't leave me alone.

"I know."

And now? Will we live like ghosts??? Will we live like this??? I was spellbound, I couldn't see all of that I should have already seen from the beginning. I am only a ghost. And it'll be a ghost too. It'll be hidden as I am also hidden. Without love, left with the shame. Someone.

There were three days Sanosuke was coming here and I didn't want to answer the door. The last time he came with Kaoru and Kenshin. She knew I was home, so she said out loud:

"Let her be there. She's so selfish and weak! She wants to lose what she managed to get, she will achieve her goal soon if she continues like this. But the loss will be bigger, she knows it."

I knew. But I just wanted to sleep. Ghosts sleep when they are not haunting people, don't they?

I want to cover my face until my life shatters for I deny this existence.

I am going mad, I know. I am going mad. I was even madder when I started all of this.

Remember, my love, I told I'd take the consequences. But I can't take them.

I cannot take them.

"Aoshi-sama! I didn't expect you here now!"

"I am back, Megumi. Life still flows in me."

I ran and held him.

"I am happy you are back, my love!"

He caressed my hair.

"I am sorry, Aoshi-sama. I could not hold and I went to Kyoto! I told them of your departure. But Misao is safe! Okina has been writing me because I am very worried about her."

He didn't say a thing. I could not see his eyes. He had one arm around me. I was apprehensive.

"I hope you're not angry with me because of this, Aoshi-sama. I ask you to forgive me."

"Misao is safe, isn't she? So, I am not angry. Anyway, it's good to come back."

It was very strange I couldn't see his eyes. He was looking down but I couldn't see his eyes at all.

"I'd be happier if you had taken care of it, Megumi. I wanted it."

I stepped back.

"How? How do you know?"

I was shaking.

He pointed to some messed sheets on the floor.

"No..."

"You're to blame, Megumi. You couldn't take the consequences. I'd be here to take them from you in case you were weak. Do you see that, Megumi? The stains on the sheets. They are made out of my blood. Your love wasn't enough for two people."

"No, Aoshi-sama! Please, understand! I didn't want it to be another ghost into your life."

"Enough!"

My body was hurting so much. My stomach was tossing and turning and my eyes were slashed by the light.

The birds were singing beautifully and the air was fresh. I could hear children playing outside. Yes, there were children playing. I could almost smile if it were not for the nightmare and all that pain I was feeling. But was it really a nightmare? I didn't know. My mind had no conditions to understand anymore.

I looked around and I saw I was not home. The door was not closed and I could see Kenshin sweeping outside. Kenji was around playing with his father. Kenshin had that comforting smiley face and he didn't mind the boy was spreading all the dust and dirtying places he had already cleaned. Beautiful scene.

I tried to stand up. It was very hard for me, I ended up falling. Kenshin heard that and came running. He opened more the door and rushed into the room, taking me from the floor.

"Miss. Megumi! You're finally awake! We've been very worried about you!"

He sat me on the tatami.

"Thank you, Ken-san. I am awfully sorry for this. By the way, what am I doing here? I remember being home yesterday."

Kenshin had serious eyes.

"No, not yesterday. It's been four days you are here, sleeping. We could not let you alone there, so we broke into your house and brought you here. You were already sleeping. You are very weak, Miss Megumi. Many days since you last ate something. But we managed to make you drink some medicine, soup."

I was very ashamed. I had been causing trouble to my friends.

"Hum... Ken-san... is Aoshi-sama back? Do you know something?"

He was confused.

"No... I know nothing about Aoshi-sama. He didn't return. He didn't send messages either."

"So, it was a dream..."

"Do you want to eat a little now, Miss Megumi?"

I looked at that lovely face:

"Oh, eat... no, Ken-san, thank you."

His eyes saddened. He lifted and told me he'd call Kaoru.

"Oh, no! She'll tell me off!" I thought.

Some seconds later, Kaoru entered the room. She seemed happy.

"Megumi, my friend! It's so good you're awake! We didn't know what to do anymore!"

I stayed silent.

"Kenshin told me you don't want to eat... look, it was not me who cooked this time! I bought food at Akabeko's! It's so delicious!"

"I dreamt of him, Kaoru."

"And so?"

"He was back. But he was sad with me."

"Why?"

"Because he wanted it and I didn't let it live."

"See? At least you seem to think better in dreams! I hope this dream will do for something!"

"What if he's dead? Why should I continue with this?"

"Do you think that he is dead?'

"I want to believe he's not!"

Kaoru looked in another direction.

"I sent Okina a message."

I lifted my eyebrows.

"About what?"

"About you, of course! I didn't say anything particular. Just told him you were in my home, that's why you were not in contact with him anymore. And I asked him if Aoshi returns there first, to tell him to come to Tokyo."

"Hum... maybe Misao won't allow. She knows about my feelings."

"Ah, ok. Do you think a man like Aoshi can be ruled by someone like Misao?"

"He loves her and she knows how to get him."

Kaoru didn't seem worried.

"If you say so."

We were silent then.

"I'll bring some soup. Try to have a bit, ok?"

"Aa."

I spent my time looking at the four walls of the room. There was a small mirror around. I crawled and got it. I looked at my self. I was horrible. My lips were very very pale, I was very pale, my face was tired, my hands were trembling, and my eyes were not shining. My hair was messy and it had also lost its shine.

"You're definitely a ghost, Megumi." I said to myself.

Kaoru entered with a bowl of soup.

"Have everything, ok? Ken-san is preparing you a bath."

I just nodded.

It seemed my body was refusing food. It was a great pain to try to have that soup, my stomach was hurting a lot. It was a warm nice vegetable soup and it gave me some strength to stand up and walk slowly.

Sano reached me and took my arm.

"Come, I'll take you to bath."

"Thanks, Sano."

He walked with me. He took me to the bathroom and sat me there.

"Do you need help undressing? I will call Kaoru."

"No, Sano, thank you very much. I can do it myself."

"Ok, then. I'll be waiting here outside. If you need something, just call out."

I smiled and closed the door.

I started undressing. The water seemed very warm and I saw a clean kimono near. There was a long time I didn't look at my body. I was much thinner. My white skin seemed stretched on my limbs. I entered the water and sat into the bathtub.

I had forgotten how good a bath was. It could be extremely relieving. My skin seemed to be getting soft again. My hands were sliding on my body, trying to feel and recognize it. It was here and it would be loved.

Ken-san was so sweet. He put many petals into the bathtub. And they brought my perfume too. I have amazing friends that care so much for me.

I could feel a bit happy again. I started singing in a low voice. Everything was silent.

On the other side of the door, Sanosuke was sat. He was glad Megumi had woken up. There was no trace of her fox appearance. She seemed so frail, so out of protection. She looked like a girl without the red lipstick, so pure. How could someone like that be so hurt? She's so astonishing. It's a pity she doesn't see that. She seemed better now, she was even singing. It was low, but it was so beautiful. He closed his eyes and imagined things he shouldn't be imagining but he was so carried away by her tunes. And his imagination was free and warm, everything was so happy there. She sang like a Siren.

I was really feeling better after that. I felt really ashamed for the stupid role I had been playing lately. We couldn't give up.

I put perfume and dressed the clean kimono. My stomachache was not that strong now and my eyes were used to the light. But there was my lipstick missing. I gathered the dirty clothes, put them in a basket and opened the door.

POW!

I screamed and jumped behind. An asleep Sanosuke fell into the bathroom.

"Oh, Megumi. I... I hadn't seen you had already left the bathroom..."

"Oh, Sano! I am sorry! I didn't know you were with your back on the door!"

He stood up quickly with his hand on his head and blinking, he told me it was nothing.

"You look better."

"I am better!"

"Where are you going now?"

"To the room I am sleeping at. I want to look for something."

"Ok, I'll take you there."

He got the basket from my hands and was walking right behind me.

I entered the room and started looking everywhere.

"Ah, what are you looking for?"

I raised my head and looked at him.

"My lipstick! But I can't find it. I guess it's not here; it's in my house."

"Oh, don't bother!"

He said with a boy-like face.

"Why?"

"You look very good without those fox red lips!"

I lifted my brows; I was really surprised by that.

"Oh, ehrm... thanks..."

He smiled.

"Where's everybody?" I asked.

"They all left. It's getting hotter, spring will come in no time. Kenji needed some clothes, Kaoru is after a fabric for a new kimono and Kenshin is planning on having a garden. Kaoru insisted they should go today. Kenshin said it'd rain but she just didn't listen. Yahiko may be with Tsubame."

"Oh, shopping time. And it's surely going to rain soon." I say while looking outside.

"Yes. Aren't you hungry?"

"No, I am not, but I am thirsty. Would you accept a warm cup of tea?"

"I don't know how to make tea..."

"Don't worry, I am going to prepare a very delicious one for both of us."

We went to the kitchen. He was helping me and watching over me carefully. The tea was ready.

We sat in a deep silence.

He was looking at me.

I smiled.

"What's wrong? Is the tea bad?"

"No! Not at all!"

"You're never quiet and you're so silent now."

He looked down.

"Hum... you're still waiting for Shinomori."

I gasped.

"Aa."

Suddenly, I remembered:

"Oh, you rooster head, you had been spying on me!"

"Calm down, foxy! It was for your safety only!"

"Hum"

"If he doesn't come back..."

"What do you mean with this?"

We both were very serious.

He came closer. His eyes were very close to mine. He put both hands on my arms.

" Megumi, I know everything. And I do mean everything. If he doesn't come back or if he doesn't want you or want it, remember me."

I was confused, my voice became louder:

"What are you trying to tell me, Sanosuke Sagara?"

I could hear his heartbeats in all that silence. It was beating really fast and loud. A thunder echoed outside.

"I love you, Megumi! And I will love your baby too if you allow me to love it as its father in case Shinomori doesn't stay with you two."

My eyes were wide opened. He was holding my arms tighter. The rain finally started to fall.

"I don't know what you're talking about. You're..."

He let go of me. He stood up and turned his back to me.

"No, I am not imagining things. I know you're pregnant and I know I do love you, Megumi. I just told you this for you to be sure you won't be alone."

He walked to the door and left the house. I heard his steps in the rain.

I stood alone there.

I just didn't know what to do. I was pretty shocked by all of that. I wish he hadn't felt anything for me. I didn't want anybody else to get hurt in this vortex.

I heard people running outside. Kenshin, Kaoru and Kenji entered home totally wet and panting.

I was still holding the cup. Sanosuke's cup was on the table. I had static eyes.

"What the hell happened to Sanosuke? Why is he sitting outside in all that rain?"

I didn't answer. I just lifted my eyes to look at her face.

Kenshin saw the cup on the table.

"Something just took place in this room." He said with a serious tone of voice.

To be continued.


	12. Sakura Blossom

Chapter XII- Sakura will bloom.

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters nor the song rights, ok?

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

It was serious indeed.

I stood up and went to the bedroom. Kaoru came after me.

"What's going on, Megumi?"

"It... it was Sanosuke..."

"What did he do?"

"He told me he knew everything about me."

"What's everything?"

"Everything, indeed."

"And then?"

I stood silent.

"Nothing. Only this."

I could see on her face she was not buying it.

"And he's outside in all that rain, crying just because of this?"

"Is he crying?"

"Yes, he is."

"Oh."

She was looking at my face waiting for me to say something.

"Ok, Megumi, you don't want to say."

I was shut.

"I respect your silence."

"I am sorry, Kaoru. It's Sanosuke who must tell you this, not me."

"Ok, I understand... oh, I bought a gift. I hope you like it."

She placed a medium package on the tatami.

"Thank you, Kaoru."

She left and closed the door.

I took the package and opened it. It was a baby's cloth.

At the end of the afternoon Yahiko arrived. He looked very glad. It was still raining. It was winter saying goodbye. We'd have springtime in two days. The Sakura festival was approaching. I remember when I was a little child in Aizu. I loved seeing those cherry blooms. Happy sweet time of my life.

I could hear Yahiko trying to cheer Sano up, but he didn't give a thing to the boy. Finally Yahiko gave up. I think Sanosuke spent the whole day outside.

At night, Kaoru entered my room and brought me some more soup. She also brought another package for me to take a look.

"Look, Megumi. This is the fabric I bought for my new kimono. I'll be wearing it at the Sakura Festival."

She opened that package and unfolded the fabric. It was a very beautiful fabric. The shade of blue was really beautiful. Royal Blue.

"You're going to look amazing on it, Kaoru!"

She smiled.

"Do you think so?"

"Yes!!! It's really lovely. It matches with you."

She sat near me and asked with vivid eyes. She really looked like a girl now.

"And you, Megumi? You are going to the festival with us, aren't you?"

I stood quiet for some seconds.

"Uh. Yes, I am going with you if you want to."

She jumped.

"Of course!!! The festival is so wonderful! I love festivals! I wait a whole year for it to happen!"

I smiled.

"Oh!" she put her hands in front of her mouth. "I think you're going to need a new kimono!"

"Don't worry, Kaoru. I have one."

"A brand new one???"

"Yes..."

Now it was Kaoru who had a suggestive face, I could almost see ears rising...

"Hum... you little wicked fox... you had already been planning and you got a new kimono much before me!"

I laughed.

"No, Kaoru! Come on!"

"Haha, you are something Megumi!"

"It was Aoshi-sama's gift. I never wore it..."

She got serious. The sound of Aoshi-sama's name seemed to haunt her.

"Oh, I see. If you want, one of us can go to your house and pick it up for you."

"I can go there by myself tomorrow."

She shook her head.

"No, no, no. you won't"

"But.."

"Don't insist! I give orders here!"

She left with a silly face and showing me the tongue.

They were really trying to cheer me up and make me forget the things that hurt me so.

It had rained all night long for sure.

The earth was wet and clean. He took his belongings and left the train station. The first place to go was the cemetery. He paid what he had to pay and one hour and a half later Misaki Yusuke was resting. He had kept his promise. Now, he could follow his way.

He went walking across the streets. It was half pat seven of the last morning of winter. The city was waking up happily. Nature was prepared for springtime. He walked on the small alleys and he saw the house from afar. Sleeping, maybe.

He got near. The neighbors were leaving, opening their houses, their windows. He knocked on the door and waited. Nobody answered. He did that once more. Everything was very silent inside. He knew how to enter, but he didn't want to do that while people had their eyes on him. He waited until there was nobody looking and entered the house. It was dirty and seemed abandoned. There were teacups and water on the floor. He entered the main bedroom. It was empty although the sheets were messed. He looked for a letter, a sign, anything. Maybe she had returned to Aizu...

"Megumi. Where are you?"

He left the house in a rush and crossed the garden. Now he was visible but he hadn't realized the neighbors were looking at him. He got ashamed.

He turned to an old lady and asked:

"Do you know of Takani-sensei?"

The old lady looked very deeply at him:

"No. It's been days since Takani-sensei is not here. But we all think she didn't travel or she would have let a message with one of us. She just vanished. We're all wondering about this situation."

"Thank you. So nobody knows something precise about Takani-sensei, uh?"

"No, no one knows, sir."

Aoshi had let his things inside Megumi's house. He left that neighborhood and walked a bit more.

Ten minutes later, he could see the dojo. Kenshin was sweeping near the street. Aoshi approached and Kenshin felt his presence. He opened his eyes and faced the walking man.

"Himura."- Aoshi bowed and greeted.

"Aoshi-sama! This servant is glad to know you are here!"- Kenshin also bowed.

"Do you know about Takani-sensei? Her house is empty."

"Yes, Miss Megumi is here. She must be still asleep."

At this moment, Sanosuke crossed the gate. He opened his eyes very wide when he saw Aoshi.

"Oh, Shinomori."

"Sagara."

Kenshin realized all the tension that was coming from Sano. He passed by Aoshi but he was still eyeing him with the corner of the eye.

"Is Miss Megumi still sleeping, Sano?" Kenshin asked.

"Y...yes, Kenshin."

"Oh, Aoshi-sama had something to deal with her, right?"

"Yes. I don't have good news for Takani-sensei."

Sano got aware.

"Takani-sensei, Takani-sensei. He thinks we're idiots. And what bad news are these he has?" Sano thought.

Suddenly, Sano stepped back and turned to Aoshi.

"She's sleeping and I don't think she'd like to have bad news now. Think before you act, Shinomori."

And he walked away with hands on his pockets.

Aoshi was very surprised.

"Enter, Aoshi-sama".

"Thanks, Himura".

Aoshi entered the garden. The earth was messed; they were probably planting flowers there. The kid was playing under a tree with a bamboo sword. Kaoru was leaving the dojo.

She looked and Aoshi's face and let an exclamation escape.

"Oh, oh, Aoshi-sama. You've returned".

"Good morning, Mrs. Kaoru."

Kenshin was smiling.

"He came looking for Miss Megumi, Kaoru."

"Oh, Aoshi-sama, she's still sleeping."

"Yes, I was told of that."

"But you can wait here if you want."

"Thank you, Himura."

Aoshi entered the main room with Kenshin and Kaoru.

"You must be hungry, Aoshi-sama, you traveled the whole night, am I right?"

"Yes, but I am not hungry. I'd accept a tea, please."

Kaoru left the room.

"So, Aoshi, you said you had bad news for Miss Megumi. Is that much particular?"

Aoshi looked down.

"Hum... Himura. It's about a friend of hers. But I guess you don't know him, he was from Aizu. His name was Misaki Yusuke."

"Oh, we know him! Once we all were downtown and this boy just came across us. He looked like Seta Soujirou."

"Yes, that's the same young man I am talking of."

"What happened to him? We knew he was going to Hokkaido."

"Well, Himura. There was a battle taking place in Hokkaido this last two months. I was in that battle. I met Saitou Hajime there too. And this boy, Misaki, was under my command."

Kenshin tried to look surprised. But he really didn't know about Saitou.

"Saitou... how is he now? And what happened to the boy? What happened in the battle?"

"Saitou is fine. He will still stay in Hokkaido for a while. The battle was because some people were rebelling against the government. They were financed by occidental people and they had many fire guns. It was a hard one. Misaki Yusuke died in battle. I brought his body and buried him here in Tokyo's cemetery earlier this morning."

Kenshin didn't know what to say.

"Miss Megumi will be very sad with this news."

"Yes, I suppose so."

Kenshin looked very deep into Aoshi's eyes:

"But don't tell her today."

"Why not, Himura?"

"When you meet her, you'll know why."

This time, Kaoru entered the room with the teacups.

They were having some tea when, suddenly, someone else entered the room mumbling a song.

I opened my eyes that morning. The last morning of the winter. The spring approach seemed to be producing good effects on me. I had slept well although Sanosuke's face had always been before my eyes. There was a nice smell of tea coming from the kitchen. It really woke me up. I washed myself and looked outside, Kenji was playing with a bamboo sword under a tree and he was doing much noise. I couldn't hear anything else that was coming from the house. Kenji was really shouting out loud that morning. I looked at him and smiled. Then, I dressed some clean clothes and started singing. That smell of tea was really turning me on. I walked to the main room. The door was semi-opened and I could only see a small piece of Ken-san's clothes and Kaoru's back. I smiled.

"Hello, good morn..."

I couldn't believe the person in front of my eyes was... Aoshi-sama.

I fell on my knees. Kaoru was very near me and helped me.

"Takani-sensei" Aoshi stood up and came to help me.

"A..Ao...Aosh... Aoshi. Aoshi-sama!" I had a big difficulty in talking.

"Megumi. Are you breathing? Are you feeling ok? Megumi!"

Kaoru was very worried.

My mouth was opened but I could not speak.

Aoshi had his astonishing blue eyes into mine. Then, I started feeling warm again. He returned to his place.

"Uh, uh, oh, yes... I am fine, Kaoru, you don't have to worry."

I was fighting myself very hard that moment. I wished so much I could run into his arms and hold him, and kiss him, and be with him. Oh, I couldn't. I was not home and Aoshi didn't know my friends knew about us. And even if he knew, I'd be ashamed of doing all of that in front of people and so would Aoshi.

Kaoru and Kenshin didn't know what to do. They were looking at each other with such strange faces.

I put some tea into my cup.

I had an extremely tremble voice.

"How are you doing, Aoshi-sama?"

"I am fine, thanks. And you, Takani-sensei?"

He didn't look at me now. He knew how to fake it. Or maybe he wasn't faking at all. He never really shows emotions.

"Uh, fine too..."

I was drinking slowly.

"Aoshi-sama was telling this servant he was in a battle, Miss Megumi."

"Oh, really?" I tried to sound surprised.

The tea was almost flowing from my cup.

"Yes, but it's over now."

"Oh" I mumbled.

Aoshi stood up.

"Pardon me, but I'll take a walk outside. Thanks for the tea, Mistress Kaoru."

He didn't look at me again.

I was really lost in there.

Kenshin and Kaoru were looking at me. When they were sure Aoshi would not hear them anymore, they turned to me and asked if I were really fine.

"Yes, I am. I just got surprised that time."

"You know you can't go through strong emotions, Miss Megumi."

"Aa."

"If you are really nice, what are you still doing here? Go, Megumi!"

"Uh?"

Kenshin and Kaoru had "go-after-him" faces to me.

"Should I? I am ashamed."

"Oh, come on! But eat something first! You're still weak."

I ate a bit and stoop up too. Then, I got my sandals and went running after Aoshi. He was walking slowly but he was already very far from anybody's sight. He had gone down the lane and he was almost into the woods. When he heard my steps, he stopped by a tree.

I was not running anymore. I was pretty breathless. I approached smiling. I still ran a bit when I got close to him.

"Aoshi-sama.!!!"

Tears were coming to my eyes.

"Hello, Megumi."

I held him very tight. He passed one arm around my body.

"I am so happy, so happy you're back safe and sound."

I looked in his face and my teary eyes could swear he had almost smiled. No... his face was clean. There was no shade on those blue eyes.

He caressed my face and he was the one to place his lips over mine.

I felt an explosion into my body. This was only happiness.

"My Okashira."

He held and lifted my hands. They were really skinny.

"You're much thinner, Megumi. What's happening? Are you sick? You're pale and breathless."

"Uh, sick? Sick? No, I am not. I was only worried because of you. And the paleness is because I am not with lipstick on."

He targeted me with his eyes. He had seen me without lipstick before.

I looked down.

"Aoshi-sama, I have to tell you something..."

"Hum..."

"I... I disobeyed you. I went to Kyoto and I talked to Okina about your departure."

"And what about Misao?"

"Well, uh, Misao overheard our talk and she knew about the circumstances. She got very very upset. She put her costume and was about to go after you but I told her things that made her give up. She's safe there now."

"Oh, I am not angry, Megumi. If everything's doing fine, then you even did me a favor. It's good to know Misao could think and block her childish reactions. It won't take long for me to talk to people there myself."

"And... and... when are you returning to Kyoto?"

"The day after tomorrow, I guess."

"So soon?"

"Yes. They're all that's left from my family, Oniwabanshuu."

I almost started crying... I turned my back to him.

"Yes, you belong in there."

And I ran to the dojo crying.

I could hear he called out my name. But I didn't turn back, I didn't go back.

I entered the garden really breathless, I almost ran over Kenji.

"Miss Megumi!!!"

I didn't look to Kenshin. I entered the main room. Sanosuke was there.

"Megumi, what's the matter? Was it Shinomori?"

I just looked at him, I didn't answer.

He came closer.

"Calm down, don't cry. You're so sensitive! Damned Shinomori! I told him to think before he acts "

He almost held me.

"I am returning home, Sano."

I entered the room I was staying at.

"No, you can't! You're not recovered yet! You..."

"Don't worry, I am not going to do any stupidity with myself. I promise."

Kaoru entered panting.

"Did he tell you, Megumi?"

I turned to her, I was really confused.

"Did he tell me? What? Was he supposed to tell me something?"

She breathed.

"Uh, did you tell him?" she asked again.

"Did he treat you bad because of the baby? Remember what I told you, you're not alone. Remember?" Sanosuke asked.

"No, I didn't tell him, I had no opportunity to do such. And I know I am not alone, my friends. Don't worry about me. I just want to go to my house and take my life back."

"We'll go with you, your house needs cleaning. KENSHIIIIN!"

I didn't exactly belonged there although my dear friends made me feel home. I had to go to where I really belonged

And I returned home. The house was a real mess, but we could clean out everything. We were very tired at nightfall. I wondered where Aoshi-sama could be. He had let his things here this morning. I was seeing them now. Ken-san told me the whole history that happened this morning. I was a foolish dependant.

I baked some loafs and we all ate a bit at the end of the afternoon.

"And tomorrow we're going to the festival, remember?" Kaoru said smiling.

"Yes." I replied. "Is your kimono ready, Kaoru?"

"Oh! I have to pick it up tomorrow at midday."

Knock, knock, knock.

I froze.

Yahiko stood up.

"I'll answer. Can I, Megumi?"

"Uh, sure, Yahiko."

He answered the door. It was not Aoshi-sama. It was Tae. She seemed very tired. She was panting.

She browsed inside.

"Oh, Sanosuke, you're here."

He stood up.

"Uh, what's the problem, Tae?"

"No problem, Sanosuke. I... I... just wanted to know if you'retakingsomeonetothefestivaltomorrow."

"Uh????????"

She was very ashamed.

I got closer.

"Oh, Sano! She just wants to know if you're taking someone to the festival tomorrow. He's not, Tae."

She was blushed.

"Who told you I am not, fox lady?"

I raised my brows:

"Are you???"

He looked down. Then, he looked at my face.

"Uh... no..."

Tae was almost purple.

"So... would you like to go there with me?"

He looked at our faces. We had "go" faces to him.

"Yes, Tae."

She jumped.

"Oh, Ok, Sanosuke! See you all there tomorrow."

She went home running.

He closed the door.

"Woohoo, Sanosuke!" Yahiko had a terrible mocking face.

"Leave me be, you brat."

Everybody laughed.

"It's getting late, Megumi. We have to go. Are you sure you don't need us and that you'll be ok here?"

"Yes, Kaoru. Thank you for everything. And I'll surely see you tomorrow."

We said goodbye and they all returned home.

I closed the door. I was feeling very empty inside.

Knock, knock, knock...

"Oh, they must have forgotten something!" I thought.

"I am going, guys!"

I went to the door and opened it. It was Aoshi-sama.

To be continued.

Yes, I am uploading very very fast now!! It's that I am excited about writing and it's also because of the nice reviews made by you, Leila! Thanks! Today I', gonna upload everything I have here! Then, it's gonna take a little more time until I write everything again. Sorry about the battle time. I am not good at it!!!!


	13. Interlude

Chapter XIII – Interlude.

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan.

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

It was Aoshi-sama.

"May I come in?"

"Yes..."

He entered. My heart jumped when he crossed the doorway.

"Did you come to take your things?"

"If you want me to do so..."

"You told me you'd be going back to Kyoto really soon."

"Aa." He said while running his eyes over everything but me.

We seemed to be out of place. We could even hear our breath.

"I didn't mean to hurt you this morning..."

"Ok, no problem."

"I am sorry."

Wow, Aoshi-sama was sorry. But we were still strange.

"Uh, this is for you."

He took a small black box out of his trench coat.

I raised my brows.

"Oh, thank you."

I opened it. There was a golden chain inside with a pendant. The pendant was made of a blue precious stone. The same blue of his eyes.

"It's a sapphire."

"Beautiful."

"It's for you to wear on the festival, if you want to."

"Oh."

He sat and showed me another chain. This one was silver and the color of the pendant was red.

"I'll be wearing this one tomorrow afternoon if you want to go to the festival with me."

I looked at him pretty surprised.

I couldn't hold my tears and a big smile. Sanosuke was right. I am very sensitive. I was still standing.

"Oh, my love, you know I'd want to go anywhere with you."

He reached out his hand and focused his enchanting eyes on mine.

"So come and stay here with me now..."

To be continued. (sigh)


	14. Senses

Chapter XIV – Senses

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan.

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

The birds were singing as if they were greeting that holy morning.

I stretched my body on the bed and opened my eyes. Aoshi- sama was sat beside me.

"Good morning, Megumi."

"Good morning."

I was lying turned to him, smiling.

"You definitely look better today. You're even blushed."

"It's because you're here."

It looked like a happy couple frame.

"I made you breakfast."

He arranged everything on a tray and brought it to bed.

"Oh, how wonderful!" I placed my head on his leg.

"You have to eat because the afternoon and the night will be quite long. We have a festival to enjoy."

I smiled and lifted my body so I could eat without dirtying the bed cloth and my own clothes.

Aoshi was just looking at me. I blushed.

"What do you want to do next?"

"I... I was thinking I should buy some food. With this breakfast now, I've run out of everything. And I only had this now because Kaoru bought it for me yesterday."

"Ok, we'll go shopping after you finish."

I was surprised. WE? Had he just said 'we'?

"You're going with me?"

"Yes, if you allow me to do such."

"I'd love to!"

"Then, I am going to change this sleeping cloth for a proper one."

He stood up and left the room.

Some minutes later, he entered the room again. I was also ready to leave; I just had to wash myself.

We left. The neighbors were on the street. They all turned their heads to look at us. It seemed they had seen ghosts walking through he front door. Aoshi had eyes closed. I was trying to be calm and let my shyness go away.

It was sunny and beautiful outside. People seemed to be really happy on the streets. The stores were full and the market was also full. Aoshi-sama was only following me. I was walking slowly, looking at everything. I had to watch carefully on what I was buying. I had stopped working for a considerable time so I had no income. I wanted to buy many many things. New bedclothes, vases, flowers! Everything seemed to lure me! There were many occidental goodies there too and I was so curious to try them all.

"Miss Megumi! Aoshi!!!"

We looked. Kenshin was waving at us. I waved back to him. Aoshi only opened his eyes. I turned my back a second and when I realized, Aoshi-sama was not there anymore. I looked around and he was 10 meters distant, talking to Ken-san. I got ashamed to get closer because both men had their eyes on me.

...

When Megumi turned his back, Kenshin called Aoshi near. He went there.

"How is she doing?"

"Better, Himura.". Aoshi was disturbed by that.

"Good."

"What's wrong with her? I asked her if she was sick, she told me she's not."

"Hum... it's not a sickness. But her nerves..."

That time she looked at them and they stopped talking. She could come near. But she didn't; she just looked and smiled. Aoshi was visibly uncomfortable.

"We found her fainted in her house almost two weeks ago and we took her to the dojo. She didn't want to eat at all and she'd given up working for weeks. That's because she's so thin and pale. It was after she was back from Kyoto."

He was silent..

"Aoshi, you don't need to hide things from this servant. Did you forget this servant is able to notice things really quickly?"

"What are you talking about?" Aoshi almost gasped.

"Of you and Miss Megumi." He said with a smiley face.

Aoshi didn't say a word.

"She loves you. You should also take good care of her. Sayonara, Aoshi. We may see each other on the festival today."

Kenshin walked and Aoshi stood there. He had no reaction.

...

Ken-san was gone but Aoshi was still there alone. I got closer.

"What's wrong, Aoshi-sama?"

He turned to me. He had a semblance of confusion.

"Uh, Himura. It was nothing."

I was just looking at him.

"Let's continue our shopping. You said you had many things to buy but you're still empty-handed." He said looking at me. "This way everything is going to be sold before you can put your eyes on them. It's so full here."

"Yes..."

We returned to the market.

I was really taking long looking at things I shouldn't be looking at. Aoshi-sama disappeared into the market.

"Oh, no... I lost him from my sight..."

Ten minutes later, there was Aoshi-sama. He appeared with his hands full of things. Men are really fast when it comes to shopping time!

"What's all of this, Aoshi-sama???"

"I decided to buy things myself. It looked like you were a little lost here."

I was SO ashamed!

"So-sorry..."

"There's nothing to be sorry for..."

"I am taking so long here! You didn't meditate today yet."

"I can do it later. Don't bother."

We kept on following. I decided to buy some flowers to cheer up that ghostly house.

"Which one do you like, Aoshi-sama?"

He looked at the flowers but he couldn't come up with a decision.

"Hum... lilies? Orange lilies?" he said.

"Ok, I'm taking these orange lilies. And this white daisies too." I said to the vendor.

We walked a bit more. I was really tired! But I didn't want to return home.

"Oh, I also have to buy some herbs and special things for the clinic!"

I entered a small store. Aoshi-sama stood outside holding his many packages. Some minutes later I left the store. He hadn't moved a muscle. I even wondered if he opened his eyes.

"Hum... I just need some sweets now. Then, we can get going."

Aoshi took a bag out of his packages. It was filled with sweets.

"I didn't forget you love them."

"Oh!"

Wow, he was really efficient!

"Aoshi-sama?"

"Yes?"

"Aren't you buying something special for the festival this afternoon?"

He continued walking. This time he was ahead.

"Special?" he asked.

"Yes... people tend to get special clothes, ornaments... this stuff"

"Oh, no! But I got already my special thing for today."

I really wondered what that special thing could be. Aoshi-sama's habit of talking in codes... But I didn't dare to ask anything else.

We walked home. He was funny, full of packages, with that enormous trench coat... and it was not cold at all that day. He walked always in the same pace. I was carrying the flowers only. We were both silent. But he was, from time to time, looking at me with the corner of his eyes.

"Oh, we're home."

Aoshi looked very disturbed by the looks of the neighbors again. I was also bothered by that. But I could understand perfectly. I had vanished for days, I had spent weeks without working and now I reappear there safe and sound with a man by my side.

I entered first and Aoshi-sama followed. We put the packages on the floor.

"Thank you very much for helping me with this, Aoshi-sama. But I guess I owe you for you bought everything."

He was taking the things out of their packages and storing them on the kitchen.

"No, don't worry. You don't owe me anything. I am also in this house, aren't I? I sent a message to people from Kyoto this morning while shopping. I told them I'd be returning soon"

I didn't answer.

I put the flowers in three vases and placed two of them in the main room and the third one in my bedroom.

"Are you going to meditate now?"

"Aa."

"Hum... are you leaving to some place or are you going to stay here?"

"I'm staying."

"Ok. You can use one of the bedrooms."

"I'll be in that small one near the bathroom."

He continued his way.

The cannon announced it was midday.

"I've got to cook something for us."

I entered the kitchen and started cooking some rice.

Knock, knock, knock.

"Oh, who might it be now?"

I went to the main room and opened the door. It was a very old lady, Mrs. Anaki, the neighbor. She had a smiley face and her eyes were browsing the house.

"Good morning, Mrs.Anaki."

"Hello, Takani-sensei. May I come in? I'd like you to take a look at my back."

"Sure! Come in..."

She stepped inside. Her eyes were running all over the place.

"Uh, come this way please..."

I was taking her to the room where I worked and could be with the patients.

"Were you traveling, Takani-sensei?"

"Oh, no! I'd been at some friends' house."

"Those who always come here?"

"Yes."

She sat on a chair.

"Could you lift the upper part of your clothes for me to take a look at your back, Mrs.Anaki? Tell me where it hurts."

"Oh, yes. It's here, in the lower part."

I pressed her back.

"Does it hurt now?"

"Hurt? Oh, no!"

I pressed more firmly and in another piece of her back.

"Have you been lifting weight?"

"No."

Her eyes were fixed on the hallway.

"Sleeping enough?"

"Yes."

"I hope you're not oversleeping..."

"Sometimes..."

"So that may be the cause of your pain. It's not good for you to spend much time sleeping or in bed. The pressure on the spine is big."

"Oh..."

"I'm going to give you this. Massage your back with it everyday."

One door from the inside opened.

"Megumi! There's something burning!" Aoshi-sama walked to the kitchen in a rush.

Mrs. Anaki's eyes shone. She stood up that same time.

"Excuse me, Mrs. Anaki."

I left the clinic-room and went running to the kitchen.

Aoshi-sama had the pot on his hands. The rice was ruined.

"It surprised me you didn't smell it."

"Oh, no! How awful, Aoshi-sama! I was with Mrs...."

That same moment the short lady showed up in the kitchen. We both looked at her.

"Hello." She said and bowed

Aoshi-sama bowed too.

"Ehrm... I was with Mrs. Anaki in the clinic-room. That's why I couldn't smell anything. The medicine smell there is quite strong."

"Who would this gentleman be, Takani-sensei? A relative of yours?"

"Relative? No! He's a patient."

Aoshi glanced me very quickly.

"Intensive care. That's why he's staying here. He works for the government. Shinomori Aoshi."

"Oh..."

Aoshi kept silent.

"Hum... thank you for your care, Takani-sensei."

She approached me, bowed and took my hand. She paid me.

"It's not necessary..."

"Oh, it is! It's been weeks you don't work..."

She went to the main room. I followed. She passed through the door and I closed it. I could see other neighbors near the garden. They seemed to be waiting for Mrs. Anaki.

I made my way back to the kitchen.

Aoshi-sama had washed the pot and had put new rice to cook.

"Intensive care, uh?"

I smiled timidly. What else could I say?

He returned to his meditation.

I started cutting some vegetables. There was someone at the door again.

"I hope it's not one more 'patient'.

I opened the door. It was Kaoru.

"Helloooooooooooooooo!"

She was very glad.

"Hi, Kaoru. Come inside."

"I just picked up my new kimono. Beautiful flowers you have here, Megumi. You're also looking nice today. Hum... there's such a good smell coming from the inside! I'd invite you to have lunch with us..."

She walked to the kitchen. I followed.

"I see you went shopping today."

"Yes. We met Ken-san there."

"Oh. I didn't put my eyes on him today yet. He left very early. But, WE? We who?

"Aoshi-sama and I."

Kaoru was looking scared.

"Aoshi-sama? Is he here?" she whispered.

"Yes... he's meditating inside."

"Oh... forgive my frankness but weren't you crying because he did something bad to you? Weren't it you who wanted to take your life back?"

I blushed.

"I know I did all of this yesterday. But here I am trying to get my life back. I am working, I am fine..."

"Did you tell him?"

"Not yet. I fear a bit. Today I am so happy, Kaoru. I don't want to be afraid today. He's caring and he's different after this battle. Something must have happened there that made him soothe his heart. I don't know what that is, he didn't tell me. I didn't ask. If he wants me to know, he'll tell sooner or later. And tomorrow he's going away, he's going back to Kyoto. My happiness is so ephemeral, illusive. But I want to hold it now with everything I have, can you understand me?"

"Yes, I can. If it makes you happy... I don't doubt he likes you. I just doubt his way of showing or not showing that."

"I am used to it. It used to be worse. Now, at least I have something to hold on to."

"But you are still going to the festival, aren't you?"

"Yes, I am!"

"Good. See you there."

She walked to the door and left.

I was in a very difficult situation. But he was here now.

"Aoshi-sama!!!! Lunch is ready!"

...

The festival time was getting near and it was making me very excited. Aoshi-sama was very silent, as always.

"Won't you take your bath now, Megumi?" he suddenly spoke out.

"Oh, no... you can go first. I... have to... look for my kimono yet."

He grabbed his clothes and entered the bathroom.

"I can prepare your bath if you want."

He didn't answer, only nodded.

I was waiting. He placed his clean clothes near the bathtub and turned himself to me. He started unbuckling his clothes. I noticed that and left. I was looking down.

When passing the door, he asked me:

"Are you ashamed?"

I didn't turn to him.

"Never. I am just going to bring some hot water."

I walked sadly and heated up the water. Aoshi came after me. He was wearing a sort of meditation robe now.

He took the water bins and walked inside the bathroom again.

I didn't dare to follow. I stayed sat near the fire. Thoughtful. I'd like to be a little part of it. And I stayed there, holding my legs. I dozed off.

Aoshi –sama left the bathroom and he dressed himself with the traditional clothes. He entered the kitchen and there I was dozing off a bit. He got closer and heated up the water for my bath. He prepared everything. Only then he called me.

"Megumi." He said in a low voice. He was down on his knees. "Megumi."

I opened my eyes.

"Oh, Aoshi-sama!"

"You are looking tired." He stood up.

"No, I just dozed a bit. I lost track of time... I... is it too late?"

"It'll be nightfall in one hour and a half or so."

"Oh, I have to rush! I still need to prepare my bath." I stood up too.

"No. I did it for you."

"Really? Thank you very much, Aoshi-sama."

"I just didn't pick your clothes because I didn't know what you'd like to dress."

I walked to the room. I got a package he knew well. From there, I took a beautiful red kimono embroidered with white flowers.

"Oh, it was still in the package." He remarked.

"Yes. Waiting for a special occasion."

I entered the bathroom and closed the door.

I took my bath; it was relaxing. I had to take care not to doze off again. There was nothing noticeable on my body but I was very ashamed of it, though.

I left the bathtub and put perfume on myself. I got the red kimono and dressed it. I also put the socks and left the bathroom.

"You're very beautiful, Megumi."

I blushed. I didn't expect this remark.

"Oh, thank you, Aoshi-sama. You're also very good-looking with these clothes."

He was wonderful. He had those traditional clothes, just like the ones Ken-san always wears. His pants were black and the upper part was a beautiful turquoise blue. I could also point a silver chain in contact with his skin, the pendant lied inside of his clothes.

I took the golden chain he had gave me the night before.

"Can you help me with this, Aoshi-sama?"

He came closer and stood behind me. He gently took my hair and put it up. Then, he passed the chain around my neck and I could feel the touch of his fingers on my nape. He buckled the chain and let my hair loose again. But he didn't move. He was still very close to me, right behind me.

"Uh... should I tie my hair?"

"No, it's beautiful this way." He said very close to my ear.

I'd braid my hair but I decided not to do it because Misao wears braids all the time. Yes, foolish jealousy.

But we both were there. I seemed paralyzed. Like a prey. Would he come closer? Would an attack happen? A prey.

"Shall we go now?" he asked.

"Yes." I whispered.

Only then he moved. My heart was jumping. I put on my lipstick and went after Aoshi-sama. We left.

The streets were so beautiful now! There were balloons, paper balls, light, flowers. People were smiling, laughing. There was music too! Everything seemed to contain a spark of happiness. I was really dazzled walking the streets by Aoshi-sama's side. He had a different look that night. I had never seen him out without his trench coat. It was strange indeed! I was smiling. I looked at him, he had that everlasting serious face, but it was not a hardened face. I wondered if he was feeling at least a bit happy inside too. Because we had lived through pain, through suffering, but I was amazed how small things seem to behold a great source of enchantment. His eyes were one of them. But he never realized it.

We arrived at the place where the festival was held. It was a big field surrounded by sakura trees. There everything seemed warmer, brighter, happier. The lanterns had various colors reflecting on people's face. The paper balls were also more beautiful there. Children were running happily, playing. Adults were mesmerized and happy. All that atmosphere was really involving! It'd be nightfall soon. Aoshi-sama and I were walking really slowly. Some minutes later, we saw that familiar group. Ken-san was wearing white pants with a lilac upper part. Yahiko was all in green. Tsubame was very gorgeous in a pink kimono. Kaoru was beautiful in her royal blue kimono. Tae was dressed in a light yellow one. Sanosuke had the usual bad guy face and the usual clothes as well. Kenji was dressed in light blue. Kaoru waved to us. I ran in their direction. Aoshi –sama came right after me.

"Hello!"

They all smiled. We spent some time together. The first to leave were Yahiko and Tsubame. They would walk around alone. Ken-san was watching over Kenji. Tae was really happy in being with Sano. She dragged him by the arm and they separated from the group. Maybe Kaoru and Kenshin wanted to be a bit alone too; or maybe it was me and Aoshi-sama... the fact is that I decided to leave them.

"We'll see later!" and I walked away.

"Let's eat something?" Aoshi-sama asked.

"Yes!"

We walked to the food tents.

"What would you like to have?"

"These sweets, please!"

Aoshi- sama paid for the sweets and bought a slice on pie for him. We sat to eat. He does not like sweets that much. He was sat very near me. People were also playing some games around. It was already evening. The music was much more intense so was the great smell of flowers. I stood up and asked for Aoshi-sama to wait for me. I went to a tent near. They were selling books. I knew Aoshi-sama liked to read a lot. I didn't know what books I should buy him, but I supposed he didn't like fiction so I bought a poetry book. Blue poem, just like the meaning of his name... I returned and sat beside him again. He was looking to something just ahead. Suddenly he stood up and reached out his hand to me.

"Let's see the fireworks. It'll start soon."

It was true. People were walking in the same direction. I placed my hand on his and he helped me standing up. I was looking up at his face. He realized that and we kept on walking. He looked at me sometimes. We were passing under the lanterns. He was amazing. The light emanating from the lanterns was playing with the shine of his black hair, the wonderful blue of his eyes. We stopped and waited for the fireworks to begin. We were side by side.

The fireworks show begun. It was so beautiful to see the colored lights in that starry night. Everybody was looking up. I got closer to Aoshi-sama, our arms were touching. He turned his head to me and then looked up again. I was smiling only. Then, I took the initiative to secretly touch his hand with my fingers. I was still looking up. He kept on doing the same. My fingers touched his. He stretched them. I passed my hand to the other side and touched the inner part of this hand. He closed his fingers, keeping mine into them for good. I approached my face of his shoulder and laid my head there. We kept like that for the whole fireworks show, the different colors reflecting on our faces. What a happy moment!

Our fingers went slipping until the lace was broken. The magic of the fireworks show faded away in the sky. People seemed absolutely happy. They were all calm, smiling, walking slowly. Some were already going away. It was night, the wind was cold now. I was looking everywhere, trying to see one of my friends. Because of the night air and the wind, the flower smell was stronger now. It seemed to carry away people. We decided to return home.

The streets were almost empty now. We were walking side by side silently. From time to time, we passed by smiley people, young ladies and their husbands walking together. Children and their parents. Friends...

I passed my arm into Aoshi-sama's. He did not pull it, he showed no objection. Maybe I was being a bit outgoing but that night had been so beautiful, I wanted to make believe a bit. We walked that way up to the street my house was located. There was nobody around. We crossed the gate and stood in the garden. I pulled his arm. He stopped. The air was fulfilled by the smell of flowers, many had already bloomed, others were about to. He was against the wind. His bangs were being thrown gracefully to the front. My hair was being thrown behind. He had one hand closed.

"Aoshi-sama..."

He stared at my face.

"This is for you. I hope you like it."

I handed the small poetry book.

"Blue poem... thank you, Megumi."

"Just like your name."

I smiled.

He walked one step on. He lifted his once closed hand and opened it revealing a cute white flower. He touched my hair and placed the flower carefully on it. Then, his hand slid from my hair to my face. I closed my eyes slowly and opened them again. He didn't move unless to blink. I was also motionless. It seemed time had frozen...

We heard voices and steps on the street! Aoshi-sama took his hand from my face. He closed it again. I got scared by the voices and steps because everything was so silent. We came back to reality. Darn it! They had just stolen my sweet moment.

"Let's enter. It's getting cold here outside." He suggested.

"Yes..."

I had almost felt loved that time...Aoshi-sama really surprised me.

He entered the bedroom. I followed him. He sat and looked at me.

"You look healthy again."

I smiled. I couldn't stop smiling. I looked around and saw the paper balls he had made.

"Thank you for today, Aoshi-sama. Mainly for this night."

I knelt in front of him.

We were silent and motionless again. Once more he came closer and passed his hand over my face, on my neck, returning to my face, almost near my lips. I was breathing deep.

Now everything seemed to be happening in slow motion. His eyes had an intense shine. The shadows were playing with his skin. My hands touched his neck and this shoulders. His warm soft skin... I was invaded by those eyes.

We were eyeing each other. I had no shame anymore.

"Aoshi."

I long for your love. Thirst for your kiss. Is this human or you're only making me alive?

...

Ok... I think it was the longest chapter until now... it took me two days to write it down and I hope it pleases you. When am I going to end? How am I going to end? I don't know! I still have many ideas going around! I haven't begun next chapter but I already got some ideas. And I liked the Interlude chapter. I also thought it was cute. I also liked writing this one, I tried to put a lot of feelings into it, and I hope I succeeded.

The quotation was taken from a Lacrimosa Song called Senses that was recorded on their album Fassade (2001). It was a great coincidence I was listening to it, it gave me inspiration and I decided to end the chapter with it like if it were a speech.


	15. Falling Again

Chapter XV –

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan.

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

XxX

I stretched my arm to the other side without turning or opening my eyes. Yes, as I thought. He was not there anymore. Only then I opened my eyes and turned to the other side. His clothes were not there either. He was supposed to be back to Kyoto. But I didn't want to believe he had just vanished like that after yester night. It wouldn't be fair. I stood up and wrapped in sheets, started tiptoeing around the house. No, he was not gone. His belongings were still there. He hadn't left the house, his trench coat was there too. I walked silently to the last room. He was there inside, meditating.

Aoshi-sama had the habit of waking up very early, sometimes even before the sunrise to meditate. Some times he meditates the whole day long.

"Megumi." He said from inside.

That scared me. Everything was so silent!

"Uh, hi."

I opened the door a bit.

He was there sat, his back turned to me. He was wearing a blue robe. He had surely realized I had opened the door but he didn't turn to look. He didn't say anything either.

"I am sorry to disturb you."

"No problem. I'm almost done here now."

"You're going to Kyoto today, uh?"

He nodded.

"What time?"

"In the middle of the afternoon."

I looked down. He hadn't moved. I wanted to tell.

"Have you had your breakfast?"

"No. The sun is only rising now."

It was true. It was very very early. I was still sleepy but there was something keeping me from sleeping.

"I'll prepare your bath, then I'll make breakfast."

He didn't say anything. He looked at me then and remarked:

"You look like an occidental bride."

I was wrapped on the white bed sheets only. I got very ashamed. Silently I closed the door. I couldn't.

I left him there and walked back to the bedroom. I arranged everything there again, folded the sheets and dressed up properly. The sun was coming up. I opened the window to let light and fresh air in. The smell of flowers came again. The same smell of happiness from yesterday. I looked outside and the lanterns were there, the flowers, everything. Everything outside was the same. Everything inside was so different.

I walked to the kitchen to prepare breakfast.

"_Can I help you, Miss Megumi?"_

He was always smiley always there to help me. It was him that used to prepare the breakfast at his house and come to the clinic very early in the morning.

I smiled alone. I was not paying attention to what I was doing. When I ended up, I had prepared the same breakfast he used to prepare.

I went to the bathroom. But I stopped by the meditation room to tell Aoshi-sama breakfast was ready. I entered the bathroom and took some time there preparing Aoshi-sama's bath. Meanwhile, he left the room got close to the bathroom door and asked me:

"Aren't you having breakfast?"

"No, Aoshi-sama. I am not hungry."

"You really should".

"Don't worry". I said with a serious tone of voice.

He left to the kitchen.

Some time later I heard him cleaning and washing the dishes. He came to the bathroom then.

"Your bath is ready."

He entered and I left.

"Thank you."

I leaned against the wall outside the bathroom.

"Aoshi-sama?"

"Yes?" he said from there.

"When you were at Hokkaido... were there many men under your command?"

"Yes... 500."

"Oh..."

"But I was not the only one in command. I was the first commandeer. There were two more."

"Do you remember your troopers?"

"Some."

I stood quiet for some minutes.

"Megumi? Are you still there?"

"Yes..."

"Oh."

"Aoshi-sama, I had a friend there at war, maybe he was under your command. He is a young man, he was 18, I guess. He's from Aizu and he helped me out a lot when I spent my time there looking for my family. He's always smiling, always there to help. He also had a certain knowledge on medical care."

"What is his name?"

"Misaki Yusuke"

That time Aoshi-sama left the bathroom. He was dressed up but his hair was very wet. He looked at me with a serious face, yet he was astonishing.

"I'd like you to go somewhere with me before I leave."

I didn't move unless to nod.

He entered the bedroom. I followed.

"Do you remember someone like Yusuke?"

He didn't answer. He got closer to his bags and took a strand from the inside.

I gasped and took my hands to my mouth. I recognized that strand. It was the one I tied around Yusuke's wrist.

"This... this... should... be..."

"With Misaki, I know... it's time to tell."

Aoshi-sama came closer. He took my left hand and put the strand on it.

"He asked me to give it back to you."

I was frozen. My eyes were very opened.

"He died in battle."

I fell to my knees... Yusuke. It was like if I had been stabbed on the stomach.

"I brought his body to Tokyo. He's buried here, he's close to you..."

Aoshi-sama came closer. The pain I was feeling increased.

There were thousand tears coming to my eyes and running on my cheeks.

"How was that? Did you see it?"

Aoshi-sama knelt.

"Yes. And he remembered of you when dying...he knew who I was."

"He knew of my feelings for you."

He took a deep breath.

"We were in the last battle. It was snowing a lot and then Misaki fell in front of me. He was shot in the chest, but he only got that bullet because he put himself in front of me, just like my fellows did once."

I could not believe that. I looked at Aoshi's face. It was painful. Those remembrances were hurting him.

"He told me 'The Okashira must live. There's someone who'd be very sad if you died'."

He was facing down. He seemed unprotected that time. That really affected him. A boy he didn't know died to protect him for he was the Okashira. I am sure that scene had came to his mind... Yusuke... Oniwabanshuu members...

I got closer and embraced him. He corresponded. It was terribly sad. Poor Yusuke. I had been in his thoughts. He protected Aoshi-sama with his own life to make him come safe and sound to me... he wanted to make me happy.

I was wetting him with my tears. He had his chin on my shoulder.

The fabric softener of the mind

makes everything lazy

and we dive down

We spent a long time like that until somebody knocked on the front door. I wiped my tears and got far from him. It was difficult to stand up due to the sharp pain I was feeling on the abdomen.

"I'm answering the door."

"Aa."

He didn't move.

It was a patient. I went to the clinic room. I was there with the patient but I could hear Aoshi-sama was dealing with something inside the bedroom. When I was finished with the patient, I went back to the bedroom. He looked at me:

"Do you want to go there with me? Do you want to visit Misaki?"

"Yes..."

He went walking to the front door. I followed. I was trying to breathe and make the pain go away.

He was sad and my red face was drawing people's attention on the streets. That only made me blush more.

"I want to buy some flowers, Aoshi-sama."

He walked with me to a tent where we could buy some flowers. Only then we made our way to the cemetery.

There we were right in front of Yusuke's tomb. I put the flowers and also tied there the strand I once gave him.

"Thank you very much for your friendship, Yusuke. I'll always be very grateful and I'll have you in my thoughts forever."

Aoshi-sama was glancing the boy's tomb. He was quiet but he was visibly upset.

I prayed a bit and I stood up. It should be close to midday, we had to go.

Aoshi-sama approached Yusuke's tomb, laid a flower there too and said:

"Thank you. Truly."

I looked at his tomb for the last time and went walking with Aoshi-sama.

When crossing the cemetery gate, I told him:

"Thank you for doing this, for bringing him here."

"It was nothing. I feel better for having done something for him. I guess he'd like to be close to you. I just feel it had to be in death."

We were returning home. While walking on the streets, Aoshi stopped and said:

"Don't you want to have lunch at Akabeko?"

"Yes, I do."

"So, let's go... and if it pleases you, we can go visit Himura and everybody."

"It'd be great." I said with no excitement on my voice.

We entered Akabeko. Tae was there smiley as always. I also could point Yahiko and Tsubame.

"Hello!"

"Hello, Tae!"

Aoshi-sama bowed.

"We want a table."

"Oh, just follow me!"

We decided to go for one that was in a quiet and empty side of the restaurant.

Yahiko noticed us and waved. Tsubame smiled.

I smiled back to both.

"What will be today?" Tae asked.

"Uh, I'd like a soba." Aoshi-sama said

"I...." I was not hungry at all. The smell of food was letting me sick. "Uh, well, me too."

Some minutes later, Tae came with the food.

She was a bit shier than normal. It was due to Aoshi-sama's presence perhaps. But I noticed she was eyeing us. Yes... it should be strange for her to see me two days in a row in his company.

We were very silent. Very silent. I was not willing to eat, but I forced myself to do such. I hadn't had breakfast and I couldn't just stand like that. We ended up eating, paid and went walking. We were going to the dojo's direction. Everything was noisy around. We seemed not to belong in there. Everybody was walking the streets with smiles on their faces, wearing light clothes, colorful. We were walking slowly like two ghosts painted in shades of gray, an aggression to that colored frame. Aoshi was looking straight forward, his hands in the pockets of his trench coat. I was looking down, sometimes looking at his face, feeling very dizzy. I was dressed in black and white and was holding my hands. Painted in fading shades of gray.

We arrived at the dojo. Kaoru was outside with Kenji. Ken-san was washing the dishes. We didn't see Sanosuke around.

"Megumi! Aoshi!"

Kaoru was the first to see us. She opened up a big smile. Ken-san looked at us but he didn't smile; he frowned. He surely realized everything. Kenji came running and grabbed my leg. I smiled sadly.

Aoshi and I bowed.

They told us to enter the house. We did. We all sat in the main room.

"So, Aoshi, I imagine you're returning to Kyoto."

"Yes. I came here to say farewell."

Kaoru stood up.

"Megumi, cam you come here inside a moment? I want to show you something."

"Oh, sure."

I followed her to her bedroom. Ken-san and Aoshi were looking at each other. She closed the door.

"What happened? You two have such faces! Don't be so sad because he's going away... he will return, won't he?"

"Yes, at least I think so..."

I didn't look at her face yet. My stomach was tossing and turning, the sharp pain from my tummy hadn't ceased.

"Do you remember Yusuke?"

"The boy we met in town some months ago?"

"Yes... he's dead... he died in battle... Aoshi-sama brought him and buried him here in Tokyo. We've just gone to the cemetery. "

"Oh... uh, we knew. Kenshin and I. Aoshi told Kenshin the day he arrived. We didn't tell you because you were very weak that time."

"Oh..." I could not feel anything toward that news. I already held many feelings inside, more than I could bear.

"But, have you told him that thing?"

"Not yet. I don't know how... but I am planning on doing such before he leaves."

"Good."

She looked at me very close.

"You're pale, Megumi. This news affected you a lot."

"Yes."

I didn't tell her the pain I was feeling.

"I guess we should return, Kaoru."

"Ok."

We returned to the room. Ken-san and Aoshi were not talking anymore.

"Shall we go or you'd like to stay here, Megumi?"

"I am going with you."

"Aa. Well, farewell, I will be returning in some time and I hope to see you again, Himura. Mrs. Kaoru- he bowed- goodbye."

"Goodbye, Aoshi." They both said.

"Bye, Megumi!"

"Bye"

We left their house and walked to mine. Deep cutting screaming silence.

Aoshi-sama entered the bedroom and got his things. His departure was very near. I started feeling worse.

He saw I was standing by the door.

"Aoshi-sama... I..."

He waited for me to complete the sentence. I had no breath, no words to do such.

"I am sorry to leave you like this, but I have to go. There are things in Kyoto I have to face now."

He took his bags and came closer. He put his hand on my face and kissed my forehead. I held his arm.

"Yes, I'll be back, Megumi. Don't worry and don't be sad."

"I... ... expect..."

I had eyes closed.

"I won't fail you."

My breath was difficult. I slid on the walls and hit the floor. I put my hands on the floor. There were tears falling.

I guess he looked behind because his steps stopped.

"Are you feeling well?"

I nodded.

He approached the door and placed his hands on it.

"I have to go now... I am sorry... take care of yourself and expect my return, please, my... dear."

The door was closed. I heard his steps outside. I was suffocating.

"Your...child..."- I mumbled.

But he was gone and I had no strength to run after him now. I lied down on the floor.

XxXxX

Oh! More angst ahead??? I am living in this fic now and it's soooo nice last chapter could please you! I guess when this story comes to its end I'll collapse!


	16. Cold

Chapter XVI – Cold

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan.

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

XxX

I don't know how much time I spent just like that, lying on the floor. It was really making me sick and the pain wouldn't go away. It should be about nightfall when I had to run to... pregnancy effects...I also noticed a small stain of blood. I had to take care of myself or something bad could happen. It's interesting that I am a doctor and I don't know how to take care of myself. I always think it's not serious enough but this time it could get. I tried to eat something, but it was not possible, my eyes were refusing to look at any kind of food. I lied down to sleep. It was impossible! What an agony! I was not sleepy and I just couldn't be quiet! But my doctor self was telling me I needed to sleep, I needed to rest.

"Come on, Megumi. It's not the end yet. You ought to stop this drama, you weak fox!"

I was angry with myself. I tried to tell but I was just paralyzed. Anyway, it's bad to be alone in this house. I wished I had much work these coming days.

As it was impossible to eat, I decided to go to the clinic room and prepare a sleeping medicine for me. I was tired and needed to rest so I decided I would sleep at any cost. It also helps passing time. I was walking like a zombie... no trace of nearly past moments around. I decided I shouldn't get close to what I named "meditation room" for a while.

After mixing and preparing the sleeping potion, I went to take a walk on the garden and backyard, I wanted to breathe a little bit. It was evening and the lights were on. The sky still had a pink shade. It'd be a chilly night. I entered again and decided to go to bed. I took the potion with me. I sat on the futon and drank the potion. I just lied down to sleep. I had prepared it strong enough to put me in a deep sleep. I wanted to wake up only next morning. Maybe the nightmare could be gone.

XxX

Aoshi left her house. He had mixed feelings inside. It was not good to leave her that way but it would be worse if he would stay more. He thought it would be. He was walking the streets. Full, as usual. A spring afternoon. He longed for returning and now, was he just running away? But he had to do that! People from Kyoto were waiting for him too and he wanted to see them. It was the best to do.

But he was very worried. There was tension in the air. He could smell and breathe it all the time. There were things that were letting them nervous. It was almost artificial. And the same time she was close, she seemed so distant. Always that tension. And these days she had been so silent. She's never silent, she likes to talk a lot. She plays and jokes and tries to make him feel comfortable but this time she was out of place. The only time it really seemed to be the real Megumi was the festival night. That night only. She'd been too shy, almost illusive and very nervous.

"Maybe I am causing harm to her. All her happiness seems to have been drained out of her. And I think I am to blame. This person I am cannot bear showing happiness. And the person she is didn't deserve it. I am to blame for what she could become. " He was very thoughtful the whole way.

He arrived at the train station. The train was already there. He wanted to enter as soon as possible.

But Aoshi had already realized someone had its eyes on him. He was just waiting for the person to show up. It was right behind him.

"Running away, Shinomori?"

He knew that voice. He turned around and frowned. So, it was him.

"No, Sagara. Just going home."

"I see... you're still very good in noticing there's someone around, uh? Even in this crowd."

Sanosuke walked in Aoshi's direction. He was smirking. Aoshi was extremely serious.

"I hope you didn't hurt people with your usual coldness..."

"What's this now? What do you want to mean with this?" Aoshi's icy blue eyes narrowed.

"You know, Shinomori. Fox lady..."

Aoshi threw his head back. Sanosuke thought he'd smirk. But he didn't. It would never fit his personality.

"Oh..."

"Everybody believes to know a lot here." Aoshi said.

"It's not only Kenshin who realizes things. There are some things that are so obvious..."

"That even one like you can guess, uh?" Aoshi was being sarcastic. But he didn't smirk. This sarcasm maybe would best fit Saitou. Aoshi's eyes had only got a different shine. A shine Sanosuke saw some years ago.

Sanosuke groaned. Then, he smirked again. Maybe Aoshi was getting angry... he didn't know. That man wouldn't show at all. He had impassible blue eyes. His face was almost ethereal, mysterious.

People were coming and going. They were both standing still.

"Yes, Shinomori. I hope fox lady is doing well. She's been destroyed inside just because of you! You don't know how much suffering you are able to inflict! You think you're the only one who suffers and make yourself blind to other people's feelings. And I don't talk only about Megumi now! You're never close; always coming and going."

Aoshi didn't reply. He stood there, holding his belongings, face to face with Sanosuke.

"It seems you have the power of luring and hurting people."

Nothing came out of Aoshi's lips. A perfect marble statue. Cold. His look was freezing.

Sanosuke had his blood boiling. Why the hell wouldn't he show any feeling? Even after those years!

Suddenly Aoshi moved and walked past him. Sanosuke got aware.

"Don't talk of what you don't know..." Aoshi barely moved his lips.

"I don't know, Shinomori? There's a lot YOU don't know!"

"Really? It doesn't affect me. But beware, Sagara." He stopped. "If it were other times, you'd have been dead from the time you spoke the first word." He showed no emotions, but he turned his head back to look at Sanosuke. Aoshi had his freezing eyes in a way that made him look like the man that sold his soul to evil once.

A drop ran on Sanosuke's forehead. He was nervous and Aoshi was looking so cold! How could someone be like that? What power did he have on people? He was emotionless, he existed only as a threat! An icy blue painting, draining the warmth from all around.

"Instead of living other people's lives, get a life for yourself, Sagara."

Aoshi walked patiently to the train and entered it. Sanosuke was there paralyzed, his teeth showing. Aoshi was detestable! He could spend his whole life, minute to minute meditating that he'd never become a human being. His fist was closed and he was squeezing the air with such strength that it made his gauzes into shreds. 'Get a life...' What the hell was he talking about? He was the one that lived to destroy other people's life! He did that his whole life! Who cares if he's a genius??? That poor child, Misao... always running after him and his coldness only put her apart. The same happens with Megumi and it'll be the same with that poor child to come.

Some seconds later, he could spot Aoshi into the train. He was sat by the window. His eyes were closed, he looked like a statue. His face was clean of anything. Not even a strand of hair was out of place. How could someone fall in love with such an iceberg? Aas once he and Yahiko thought: "women are all crazy... and dangerous!" But Aoshi had led him to burst inside.

"$0#0!..."

Sanosuke was extremely furious. The train left and he was still there. He couldn't return home... maybe he'd drink sake and get into some fights... he could pretend the men were thousand Aoshis and he'd beat them all!!!

XxXxXx

Short chapter again! I had this idea yesterday when I was waiting to see the doctor... I gotta go to a shrink!!! : P When it ends it's going to be a very big trauma in my life, it'll leave a beautiful emptiness!

PS: Occidental From the Occident. Aoshi said Megumi was looking like an occidental bride, a bride from the Occident because she was wrapped in a white fabric like if it were a wedding dress! . It made sense for me but since I am not a native speaker... I am not sure if it really exists this way.

Oh, don't be so hard on Aoshi-sama : P


	17. Pathfinder

Chapter XVII – Pathfinder

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan who is going crazy because of this fan fiction... cries...calls the shrink

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

XxXxXxXx

"What did Sanosuke mean with that 'there's a lot you don't know'?"

Aoshi was into the train. He knew Sanosuke was still outside. It would depart soon. The train doors were closed. Time to go.

Aoshi was thinking his relationship with Megumi was like poison to her. And he could see it on her face. Each time he returned, there she was, waiting. What if someday everything just becomes tiring? She's spending her days, her youth with him, in insecurity.

She was so strange this last time. Maybe she had realized something into herself. Yes, she was lovely but she was also hiding. When he was leaving, she didn't come to kiss him, she didn't come to tell him not to go that time, she didn't insist. It was new. She only stood there sliding on the wall to the floor, looking down. It seemed she couldn't say a word. She was sad but it was different. She had been sad those three days he spent there. A nervous relationship. He was very worried and she seemed scared. It looked like if they touched the spot, something would burst. Something would shatter. He even suspected she was avoiding him sometimes. Why? Maybe his lack of emotions was taking her mood downhill. Maybe her feelings were going away each time he had to leave her.

The window was opened. The train was going on the rails. The smell of the grass, flowers and plants outside... the smell of flowers... the festival. Everything was warm; he was remembering and observing.

He was very very tired. But he couldn't stop thinking. His brain insisted on bringing sweet and bitter flashbacks.

Kyoto. Tokyo. Bakumatsu. Emptiness.

He took his bag and searched inside. His hand touched a small book. He took it out of the bag. A blue cover for a blue poem in a blue moment.

"Just like your name..." he remembered her face when she handed it to him. She had shy eyes.

"I just hope she's better by now..."

He was feeling guilty for leaving that way. And that scene was coming to his thoughts all the time. He was trying not to think of it but it was almost impossible!

He opened the book. Small sad poems... blue lines hidden in shy eyes. It was almost a psychological torment. He took his hand to his neck and searched something into his clothes. Yes... it was there, the silver chain with the red pendant. He let his hand rest opened on his chest, the pendant was right under his clothes.

He skipped some pages and read one more. Little sparks of happiness in cold gestures. Oh, the book seemed to have been costume maid.

XxXxXxXx

Night scent. It was a good weather for a winter's night. He heard the wind on the trees.

"Come inside!!!"

Someone looked at the body leaning against the wall.

"Good, he's sleeping!"

"Okashira... such an uncomfortable position!"

"Take care! Don't wake him up! The Okashira is very tired. He trained all day long."

"Shhh! He's a very light sleeper!"

"Shut up!"

Aoshi opened his eyes. It was dark and he was surely a light sleeper.

"We are sorry, Okashira... we didn't want to wake you up!"

"Yes! It was Hyottoko's fault, that fool!"

"I am sorry, Okashira!"

The four men bowed.

Aoshi was sat.

"Don't bother. Where were you going? It's very late at night."

"Nowhere, Okashira!"

Aoshi narrowed his icy blue eyes.

"Oh, Okashira, don't look at us like this!"

It was almost a plea.

Aoshi looked around. They were in a small house, it was almost a hut. The four men were into his bedroom now but they were passing on the main room before.

He stood up. The four men trembled.

"Oh, Okashira, go back to your sleep!"

Aoshi didn't say a word. He would go outside and check what was going on.

"Let's tell the truth." Hannya said.

The three men looked down, were disappointed.

"Ok..."

"Aoshi-sama..." Hannya got closer "we bought you something... bring it here, Shikijou."

The scarred man went outside and entered carrying a thin golden box.

All four ones placed their hands under the box and brought it to Aoshi's presence.

"It's for you, Okashira. For your 18th birthday tomorrow."

Aoshi raised his eyebrows.

"Thank you." He was surprised.

"It's for you to place your sword when you're not in battle, Okashira. The mightiest sword may be kept in a fine golden box when it's not near the best swordsman."

Aoshi was really glad. He could almost smile. The corner of his lips lifted a bit... but there was something that was always keeping him from smiling inside his heart. But he was glad. The Oniwabanshuu. His family and life were there in Oniwabanshuu.

Aoshi placed the box near him. The men left, except Hannya.

"We're very happy to be with you, Okashira. Tomorrow is the most important date of the year for us. It exists to remark a genius was born, our Okashira. And we are proud and fortunate to be with you. You're much younger than all of us but you were always there to watch over us. The Okashira is the most honorable man we could ever know. Since you were a child you were there teaching us. You were only 13! A child in age but an Okashira to be... a precious man."

Aoshi had no words. Suddenly, the scene changed. They were not at the hut anymore. They were into the train. Hannya's tone of voice became very serious.

"But you should detach yourself from these sad memories and live the life you deserve, Okashira. You deserve happiness, glory. Time has changed but you're still the best, Okashira. You just need to realize it. And closing yourself is not a good path. Give it a try. You know there are things you want to live, you want to show. You have always kept yourself into this shell, so much pain. You're so marvelous, Okashira! Everyone notices it, one way or another. It would make everybody glad if you'd follow it at least once. Pardon me for my words, Okashira. But we are not the only ones that admire and worship you. you know that, don't you, Aoshi-sama? "

XxXxXxXxXx

Aoshi opened his eyes. He looked around, he was into the train. He was going back to Kyoto. He was breathing heavily. He searched but Hannya and the others were not there.

A dream. It was nothing but a strange dream. It could almost make him happy again. But he was buried in sad memories he couldn't get rid of yet. He had to find his inner peace, he should discover himself under all that pain.

"I abandoned everything... it's not easy to come back after so many years... my life time was spent like that. I can't recall... my childhood? There was no childhood in those bloody times. I had to be a man and it was not difficult. The Okashira. But there's neither guilt nor regret. It was a big joy to be their Okashira. It'll always be." he thought.

He looked outside. The afternoon was getting a yellow shade quickly.

He turned his head to all sides. People were there. Some were talking, others sleeping. Some were just looking through their windows.

He was still breathing heavily.

He looked at himself. He had the hand on his chest. The book was on the seat. He got the book and opened it in a random page. He read.

"Aa."

Aoshi looked for his bags and put the book back inside. He stood up and went walking. He passed through a door. The next carriage had the door closed. He jumped. He walked the next one too. He did the same thing. He walked the carriages until he arrived to the engine room. The train driver was looking outside. He hadn't realized Aoshi's arrival. But Aoshi's picture was reflected on the glass. The man saw a tall handsome man dressed in dark and with a beige trench coat. Only then he turned around.

"Oh, gentleman! You shouldn't be here. It's a restrict area."

"I know."

Aoshi didn't move. His bags were on the floor.

The train driver said:

"If you don't have something to tell about the train, a problem or such, would you please return to you seat, gentleman?"

Aoshi just opened his lips a little:

"How far are we from Tokyo now?"

"From Tokyo, gentleman?"

"Yes."

"I think it must be about 25 km. Is that all?" the man turned his back to Aoshi believing he'd return to his seat now.

Aoshi turned his head to the window. It'd be nightfall in about one hour.

"Stop this train."

The train driver was dumbfounded by Aoshi's request.

"Excuse me, sir?"

Aoshi had a very cold face.

"Stop this train."

The man started shaking his head and gesticulating.

"It's impossible, sir! I cannot stop this train, please go back to your seats or I'll have to call the guards that are in the back carriage."

Aoshi had also seen some policemen in there.

In a glance, Aoshi took one of his kodachis. He was right behind the man now.

The train driver was very scared. He had his mouth opened and he was gasping.

Aoshi didn't raise his voice at all. His eyes narrowed until there was only a bluish light on them.

"Won't you stop this train now?"

Terror.

"Yes, yes! Just a second!"

He pulled a lever that was on his right. The train suddenly broke. The passengers were screaming; things were falling. Aoshi had to stab his blade on the inner wood wall of the train not to fall.

People were looking through the window to see what was happening. Aoshi kept his kodachi, got his belongings and opened the cabin door. He jumped out of the train.

People did not believe that scene. Aoshi didn't glance back. He left the railroad and went into the woods.

XxXxXxXxXx

Thanks a lot for your fast reviews! I love reading them and it's the source of my will to post in here!

Ok, let's talk nonsense!

I guess I am going nuts with this story... I just think of it all the time. This week I am in a Law Conference (yes, I study Law...spit...) and I am taking my material there (Discman, sheets of paper, pencil, the story so far printed.). I eat, sleep, walk and live like this now.

Megumi is my favorite female character too. I also like Tomoe a lot. But Aoshi-sama rules my heart. If there wouldn't be Aoshi-sama I'd go for Saitou or Hiko! . And there are other cuties like Soujirou, Sano, Ken-san, but they are cuties, nothing that devastating; when in Hitokiri Battousai's time, with those assassin eyes, Kenshin also had the power to get to my heart. My... I have a crush on "bastard" guys! (drools and roll eyes...)


	18. Cross

Chapter XVIII – Cross

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi...) I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan who is going crazy because of this fan fiction... / cries.../ calls the shrink

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

XxXxXxXx

Aoshi went walking. He took off his trench coat and kept it into his bag.The sunset was approaching quickly. He had to run really fast when there was some light still left. When night comes, things will be a bit harder. The wind was blowing strong. Everything inside the woods was very silent. There were only some birds chirping and some random ones flying to the top of the trees. He had 25 km to walk. He was running. He was really fast at running. But running 25 km really fast is not easy.

He had to stop sometimes and walk slowly.

The sky was turning to red. Some gray clouds were also coming. The wind was stronger.

Everything was really quiet except for Aoshi's steps and the wind on the trees.

"Let's go, Shinomori Aoshi. Rush! Run!"

He was being hard on himself that time. There was an extremely long time since he last had to run such distance in such hurry. He started breathing heavily. His thoughts were all messed up into his mind. The leaves and sticks on the ground were rustling. He was trying to take advantage from the fading daylight. It was almost gone. Aoshi was inpatient. He had only been running for about half an hour. The light went away. Aoshi was forced to stop. Everything was very very dark. Yet, everything was silent. He could only hear some insects chirping, his own slow steps and the leaves rustling under his feet and with the wind.

He looked up. The sky had many clouds but the moon would be rising soon. He could see a beam of light behind some mountains far beyond. Aoshi was walking now. He needed his eyes to get used to darkness, so it could make his trip easier.

XxXxXxXx

Sanosuke was very furious. He watched Aoshi's departure and he really decided to have some sake and get into some fights.

He was walking the streets with a very bad face, hands on his pockets.

"Damned Shinomori."

He walked a bit more.

"Damned Fox lady."

And...

"Damn, damn, damn!" he kicked an imaginary can, stone or something that would be on his way.

"Oh! You shouldn't say such bad words..."

Sanosuke looked behind. It was Tae. She was pretty blushed. They were in an alley rather near Akabeko. Tae should be coming back from the market, she had some packages with her. Sanosuke looked all around.

"Uh... going home, Tae?"

"Yes..." she placed the packages on the floor.

"Nice." He turned around.

"Sanosuke... would you please help me with these packages?"

She was timid that time. She had her hands in front of her mouth, the packages were on the ground.

He didn't turn back.

"Well..."

She interrupted.

"Then you could eat something there at Akabeko. I'd prepare something to show you my gratitude for your help."

He walked in her direction and got the packages from the ground. He went walking. Tae followed.

"Sanosuke?"

"Yes?"

"Maybe it's not my business but you are very angry towards Miss Megumi, ne? I overheard you cursing."

He continued walking.

"Come on. That fox lady. I am just worried about her. I think she's going nuts..."

"I saw her today. She was with that very handsome gloomy man we..."

Tae was interrupted by Sanosuke's look when she said the word "handsome". He didn't like that. He was jealous! But jealous of her because she thought that man was handsome or because Miss Megumi was with him? She continued:

"Oh, as I was saying... she went to Akabeko and had lunch with that man we saw with her at the festival.

Sano didn't say anything. "Shinomori Aoshi- the 'very handsome gloomy man'. Oh my, he really has loads of power above women!"

"Are they together?"

"Together, Tae?"

"Yes... you know, dating..."

Sanosuke rolled his eyes. Tae didn't see that. He sighed.

"Who knows? But I wouldn't consider so. That psycho went away today."

They had arrived at Akabeko's door. They entered.

"Please Sanosuke, place the packages here."

Sano did what Tae told him to do.

"Thank you!!!!! Now I'll prepare your favorite food!"

The restaurant was completely empty, it was not time to open it yet.

"Tae..."

Sanosuke was still standing.

Tae was about to enter the kitchen and leave Sano alone in the main hall. He turned to him gracefully.

"Yes?"

"There's something I wanted to tell you..." his face was serious. He put his hands on his pockets again.

"Yes!!!!"

Tae's face was full of hope. She could almost fly that time. Her heart was jumping!!!! What would he tell her? What would he tell her? In her mind she could see the two of them in the middle of yellow, blue and pink bubbles, everything smelled like flowers!!!! Ooooo!

Suddenly Sanosuke's face changed into something badly done. His eyes were flat and he put his finger up:

"Take care. Don't go falling in love with that 'very handsome gloomy man'". He made a girlish voice on the last part of the sentence. "He's crazy, a heartbreaker, a merciless and ruthless psycho!!! He's evil!!!" He was shaking his both hands in the air trying to scare her.

Tae's world just fell on her head. She groaned. A nerve was easily noticeable on her forehead.

"And you are really a rooster head!!! Like Miss Megumi and Yahiko call you! No more salvation!!!" she turned around and let him alone there.

Sanosuke didn't understand her attitude very much but she was looking dangerous mainly now he could see she was chopping carrots with an extremely large blade. He thought he'd better shut up. Angry women with a giant sharp blade are far too dangerous. More dangerous than Kenshin, Aoshi or Saitou together could ever be.

XxXxXxXxXx

His eyes were used to darkness. The moon was full and it was lighting his path. He could run faster now. He hadn't lost complete track of time yet. It should have passed one hour since sunset. He was rushing once again. The sky was getting darker despite of the full moon. There were many clouds and sometimes it was also very very difficult to run or walk in the dark woods. There were many sticks and logs on the floor so when it was dark, he had to walk slowly and use his senses to the most, even considering his senses were much accurate and powerful than anyone else.

He wished a lot the clouds would let the moonbeams come. The trees were very tall and full of leaves too and it was one more difficulty for him to surpass. Time was running fast.

XxXxXxXxXx

Sanosuke was quiet, almost sleeping on a chair. Suddenly Tsubame opened the door.

"Hello, Sanosuke!"

"Hello!"

Tae put her face out of the kitchen's door.

"Hum... here you are, Sanosuke. It's ready!"

Sanosuke looked at the food.

"Nah... I'll pass. I don't know if you put poison there..." he was visibly joking.

Tsubame was really surprised. Tae was almost fuming.

"What was/is going on here? Aren't we late???? It's already night time!"

"Nothing. But we're late. I hadn't noticed it was already night." Tae answered.

Sanosuke decided to eat fast.

"I'll open the restaurant for you, Tae."

"Thanks!"

Tsubame was putting everything on its right place. She opened the doors. It was night time, a bit later than they used to open.

"I want sake, Tae."

She brought Sanosuke the drink.

"Only one bottle??? More more!!!"

"Oh my, this is not going to end up ok ..." she thought.

Sanosuke was grinning. He was drinking really fast.

Tae stood there with Tsubame serving the costumers. Sanosuke was going too fast and too drunk! She decided to return there after one hour and a half.

"Enough, Sanosuke! You drank too much. You're going to give Kaoru and Kenshin some problems."

"Come on, Tae! I'm not returning home!"

"NO??? Where are you going then?"

He was smirking.

"Hum...somewhere else... hehe."

She was scared.

"But that's enough for today here. Are you going to pay now? You drank too much!"

He looked at her.

"Pay??? No, no, no. I'm not the one who's going to pay. Remember the 'very handsome gloomy man'? Shinomori Aoshi!!! Put it on his bill. He has one here, uh? If he doesn't... Fox lady has..." he said this with sad eyes. "Byez..."

He stood up and passed through the door.

"Shinomori-kun and Miss Megumi... Sanosuke has something very serious to do with them..."

Tae took the empty bottles away and walked sadly into the kitchen.

XxXxXxXxXx

The sky was absolutely cloudy. Aoshi couldn't guide himself by the moonlight anymore. But he had run enough, he could see the city lights a little far beyond. He'd even go past some huts and small villages in no time. He was arriving.

He had those lights ahead him now. He didn't know for how long he had been walking. He just knew his legs were hurting. But it didn't stop him from running a bit more. He run until he could arrive near the huts. He passed them by. Tokyo was ahead.

In about half hour he was in the city. It made him breathe again. Now he was close, he could even walk a bit slowly. But he still had to walk across the city. He was bound to its other side.

The sky at Tokyo was heavy. It'd rain at any moment. The streets were desert. There were only some vagabonds roaming around. Aoshi walked more.

The rain started to fall. It was a really heavy rain.

He passed in front of Akabeko. It was near now.

He turned the corner and took a shortcut. It was empty except for a white figure in the shadows.

"Oh, am I dreaming?" he said grinning. His eyes were noticeable now.

"Not again..." Aoshi thought.

He had recognized that voice. The man dressed in white came out of the shadows. He looked at the blue-eyed wet man that was entering the alley.

"I can't believe it... Shinomori."

It was Sanosuke.

XxXxXxXxXx

Different chapter, uh? There's even a bit of humor. It's just to brighten up the story a bit.

Next chapter will have the usual angst atmosphere.


	19. From Darkest Skies

Chapter XIX – From Darkest Skies

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi...) I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan who is going crazy because of this fan fiction... / cries.../ calls the shrink

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

XxXxXxXx

Sanosuke came out of the shadows.

"Whoa! I guess I drank too much!" he opened and rubbed his eyes trying to focus on Aoshi.

"Do you know my plans, Shinomori? You pissed me off this afternoon and I decided to drink and get into some fights; I just didn't imagine it'd be with you! But... is it really you?"

Aoshi stepped forward.

Sanosuke was blocking the way.

"Move on, Sagara."

He didn't pay attention.

"Weren't you supposed to be on your way to Kyoto right now?"

Aoshi tried to pass by him. Sanosuke stretched his arm.

"Is it like this? You abandon people to their worst and then you decide to come back like if nothing had happened?"

Aoshi pushed Sanosuke's arm.

"I'll not let you go there to fox lady."

Aoshi finally spoke:

"I didn't run kilometers to be stopped by a foolish one. Move on, I don't want to hurt or kill you."

Sanosuke got furious.

"What??? Oh, now you asked for a fight. And I don't mind you got your clothes wet and torn in running these kilometers. But it's you who is going to get hurt."

Sanosuke ran in Aoshi's direction.

"It was you who asked for this..."

Sanosuke yelled:

"Come, get your blades!"

"I don't need to use them to get you down."

The rain was falling.

Sanosuke didn't see Aoshi anymore. He moved too fast. When he could see him again he was surrounding him, performing his Ryuusui No Ugoki, the water flow technique. But it was different cause Aoshi didn't have his kodachis. Sanosuke was looking all around. Many figures dressed in black with that cold look were around him now. It was one of Aoshi techniques and it was worse for Sanosuke because of the alcohol effects. Suddenly, everything vanished and Sanosuke was on the ground. Aoshi had used one of this kenpo attacks.

Aoshi got his bag from the ground.

"Shinomori..."

"It only lasted some seconds.... I told you I didn't need my swords to finish you."

Sanosuke didn't stand up. He was lying with his belly on the floor, one arm stretched on Aoshi's direction.

"Don't go bother her with your coldness!!! She doesn't deserve it!"

Aoshi was walking. His steps were echoing on the wet empty alley. His legs were hurting.

"Please be there safe when I arrive, Megumi."

It was late. He had lost plenty of time in the woods, waiting for light. He arrived at the street. It was silent and empty too. He crossed the gates into the garden. He wouldn't knock on the door; that would probably wake neighbors up. But was it right to enter her house like this? She thought he was on his way to Kyoto, it would surely scare her. He knew how to enter.

He did.

The lights inside were on. She wasn't sleeping yet. He took off his shoes. The house was very silent.

"Megumi?" he almost whispered.

There was no answer.

He walked into the clinic room. It was empty. He blew off the light that was coming from there. He looked and saw she was not in the kitchen. She could only be into the bedroom.

He walked across the hallway. The door was closed and there was no light coming from there. He took a small lantern with him and opened the door. He placed the lantern on the floor and he saw a body laying on the futon. She was there asleep.

He lit other three lanterns that there were in the bedroom. He saw there was a small cup on the floor, near her arm. The blanket was not covering her body, it was placed aside.

Aoshi was very cold. He was completely wet. He had some scratches and bruises and his legs were very tired. His clothes were also torn. He left the room and decided to heat some water, he'd take a bath and then he'd take off the thorns out of his skin and clean the scratches and bruised.

It was relieving to see her sleeping like that. It seemed she was in peace. He entered the kitchen and over a small table he noticed the chain he gave her the night before the festival. She was not wearing it anymore. He was still wearing his. He didn't know why but it let him a bit down. He took his chain out of his clothes, took it from his neck and placed it on his pocket.

"It was good to see her safe but I must end this up. It's getting very difficult for her to stand it up. It must end before more suffering comes."

He decided to enter her room again. She was there in the same position. He got closer to her and sat out of the futon not to wet it. He had a serious semblance. He stood some time just looking at her face. Suddenly he bowed to kiss her lips. He didn't know why but he felt like doing that. It had nothing to do with his regular personality but...

He did. Her lips were very cold. He took his lips from hers in a glance and opened his eyes. Cold lips she had. He touched his own lips. They were wet because of the rain, they were cold. He passed the back of his hands many times on his lips to dry and heat them. He came closer to her and put his lips on hers once again. No, it wasn't due to his lips. Her lips were very cold. He touched her stretched hand that was out of the futon. Her hand was cold. He touched her face and it was also cold. He felt a sharp pain in his stomach. He grabbed her neck. Yes, the veins were pulsing but it was not normal, they were pulsing slowly. Her breath was also slow and it was not deep, she was barely breathing.

He called her name.

"Megumi."

She didn't move. He placed his hand under her head and lifted it. He called her again, this time it was louder.

"Megumi. Megumi."

Nothing. She didn't even move her eyebrows.

Aoshi was beginning to feel... there were years since he last felt it.

He made her sit, his arms were around her, holding her loose body.

"Megumi, Megumi, Megumi!"

She didn't move. No matter how loud he called her, she'd give no signs of waking up.

Aoshi's breath was getting harder.

He started to shake her.

"Megumi, wake up!"

Her hair was dancing in the air, her head was pending, and so were her hands. Her eyes were closed and her face was clean of any expression, like a doll. There were shadows on the wall.

"MEGUMI!"

What was that feeling? No, it couldn't be fear. Yes, he was afraid. But, he could not!

He held her close to him. Only then something caught his attention. There was blood on the sheets.

It was despair. She was so cold and weak. She was also bleeding.

The emotionless man feared. He was almost in despair. And it was very new to him.

"And now? What can I do?"

He placed her again on the futon and ran to the clinic room. He browsed the shelves trying to find something. A medicine. He looked up on her notes but he didn't find anything that would help. There were three bottles unlabeled on the table, it seemed she had just used them that night, but he didn't know what they were.

"A doctor. She needs a doctor."

He was in the middle of the main room. The rain was falling outside. It was not so intense but it was still raining.

He remembered of the old doctor she used to work with some years ago when she left Kanryuu's mansion. But he had no idea of whom that old man was or where to find him. He didn't even know if that man was still alive.

Suddenly he said:

"Himura! Battousai or someone there at that dojo must know where to find him."

It was late. He knew everybody should be already sleeping but he didn't mind his manners that time. He opened the front door. He glanced behind. He knew it wasn't right to leave her alone but he had to go. He closed the door and left the garden. He walked on the streets the faster his legs would allow him to.

"Come on, weak body, there's no pain now..."

He was trying to run. But he was also very weak. He was cold and hungry. But he continued. It was only a fifteen-minute walk to the dojo.

The streets were even emptier now. Once again he found that man tottering on the streets. He was also going to the dojo. Aoshi passed by him.

Sanosuke looked up.

"Run, Shinomori... run..."

"Don't bother me now, Sagara!" He stopped. "Megumi's in danger!"

Sanosuke stopped too.

"What?"

Aoshi glanced back. He was frowning and he seemed to be ... afraid!!!

"I need a doctor. Where can I find one? Where can I find that old doctor that is her friend?"

"What did you do to her, you psycho?" Sanosuke grabbed Aoshi by the neck of his clothes.

Aoshi pushed him away.

But Sanosuke did that to check if he was really seeing a trace of any kind of emotion on Aoshi's face.

"If you don't know, I'm not wasting my time here with you!"

Aoshi he turned back and ran to the dojo.

He arrived there. He was panting. He knocked on the door.

XxXxXx

Inside of the house, Kenshin opened his eyes. Kaoru also woke up.

"What is going on? Who might it be now?"

Kenshin stood up.

"I am going to take a look. Stand back, Kaoru."

Kenshin was finding that very strange.

The person knocked again and again. Whoever it could be, it was in a hurry.

Kenshin opened the door. He could not believe his eyes.

Shinomori Aoshi was there, panting, wet by the rain on his front door. He looked confused. If he didn't know that man he'd say he had almost a semblance of despair.

"Aoshi???"

"Battousai." he was panting. "I need your help. Where can I find a doctor now?"

Kenshin looked pretty surprised. He had the familiar 'oro'face.

"Did you forget Miss Megumi is a great doctor?"

Aoshi almost shouted.

"It is for HER!"

"What???" Kenshin raised his eyebrows. The oro face disappeared.

"I have no time to explain! Where does that old doctor live? The one that made her his assistant!"

Kenshin was baffled by that scene. The only time he saw such semblance on Aoshi's face was when his Oniwabanshuu mates were killed in front of his eyes.

"He lives rather near. It takes only ten minutes to get there. I can go there with you."

"So, let's go!"

Kenshin left the house without telling a word to anybody. Kaoru got worried. She had left the bedroom and was walking to the front door when she saw Kenshin leaving.

Aoshi and Kenshin were rushing on the streets. Kenshin decided to ask what was going on.

"It's Megumi. I returned from my way to Kyoto because I thought it wouldn't be good for her to be alone for she was feeling bad and found her unconscious on her futon. She was cold and her breath was almost imperceptible. There was a rather big blood stain on the sheets too."

Kenshin said nothing. They kept on running. The rain was stopping. They finally arrived.

Aoshi knocked on the door. It took some time to a sleepy boy come and answer it.

"Hello, Koji. Is your grandpa home? It's urgent. We need to see him."

The boy was rubbing his eyes. He looked at Kenshin and smiled.

"Himura-san! What a long time! Enter! I am going to wake grandpa up."

Kenshin entered. Aoshi was outside.

The boy returned.

"Come this way Himura-san. And you too, please!" he said to Aoshi.

They both entered a small room. There was a very old man lying on a futon.

"Long time no see!"

"Yes." Kenshin replied. "We need your help. There's something wrong with Miss Megumi."

The old man opened his eyes wide.

"What happened?"

"We need you to come with us. She's unconscious." Aoshi said.

The little boy showed up again.

"Grandpa cannot leave this house. He can no longer walk."

Kenshin and Aoshi looked at each other.

"But there is a way I can help." the old man said.

"Tell us!" Aoshi replied quickly.

Kenshin was observing Aoshi. He couldn't believe that scene. That icy man was showing FEELINGS. He was worried.

"If she could come here..."

"But Aoshi told she's unconscious, she can't come either..." Kenshin said.

Aoshi went walking to the door.

"I'll bring her here. Wait for us."

He walked alone to the front door. Koji came his way.

"Are you leaving?"

He nodded.

"I'll open the door for you."

From inside the bedroom the old man asked:

"Bring with you anything you would find suspicious."

Aoshi didn't look behind.

"Aa."

He left.

Kenshin stood there impressed by Aoshi's reaction.

XxXxXxXxXx

It seemed Aoshi's fate that night was to run until his legs would give up. He was lucky, the rain had ceased that moment. But he was very wet.

He arrived at Megumi's house and entered. Everything was exactly the way he had left. He started looking for something suspicious. He entered her room and she was there, looking lifeless. Pale and cold. The only suspicious thing he found was a very small cup placed beside the futon. And the stained sheets. Her clothes also had blood. He decided not to take her outside with those clothes, they were sleeping clothes and they had blood on them. He got a clean kimono and dressed her with it. She had no suspicious signs on her body. It was rather difficult to do such because her body seemed to slip from his arms all the time. He had to do it carefully, almost like a ritual. She had no socks and he didn't put them on her feet. He went to his bags and got his trench coat. He came again and sat on the bedroom floor. He got Megumi carefully and put her in his arms. He involved her body on his trench coat. He put the cup in one of his pockets and folded the sheets to take them with him. He stood up and took her body on his arms. He touched his face on hers and it was really cold. That's why he put the trench coat around her, to try to keep her less cold while they'd go across the streets.

He was almost forgetting the bottles he had seen on the clinic. Maybe it was nothing, but he decided to take them. The old doctor would know what they were.

He left the house. It was raining again. Not a heavy rain, not a light rain. He pulled the trench coat over her face to protect her from the rain.

It was a sad scene. An icy blue-eyed man, dressed in black, totally wet by the rain. In his arms there was a woman wrapped in a beige trench coat like if she were a baby. Only her feet were showing. He was walking the empty streets late at night. He was looking down at her face. His wet bangs were dropping water on her pale cheeks.

XxXxXxXxXx

It's me again! I don't know why but personally, I liked this chapter. It has a mental soundtrack that is very sad.

Oh, it's good to know about the grammar improvements! I really got happy! And I really got ashamed about the custom-made and such because I knew it! But I couldn't strive myself from making a very big mess with the words, sorry... (/ run to cover my face!)

Now it's the 19th chapter. This is getting soooooooooo long! I started next right now, I don't know when I am going to finish cause university is draining me this week!


	20. Façade

Chapter XX – Façade

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi...) I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan who is going crazy because of this fan fiction... believe me, yesterday I thought I had seen Saitou! OO

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

XxXxXxXx

It was almost an agony to walk with her across the streets. Would it be too late? He could not abandon his pessimist dark side.

He wished he would arrive soon at the doctor's house; he wished she'd wake up soon; he wished he wasn't feeling that way.

But the path seemed endless. The more he walked, more distant he seemed to be and more feelings were rising inside.

Only his steps and the falling rain could be heard on the empty wet streets.

Finally, he could see the doctor's house. There were two people waiting outside. It was Kaoru and Kenshin. He also saw Sanosuke around.

Aoshi walked faster and arrived at the house.

"How is she, Aoshi-san?" Kaoru asked. "Sanosuke went to the dojo and told me he had seen you."

He noticed she was very worried, her eyes were very opened and her hands were together.

"She's very cold. The same of when I first found her."

Kaoru's face had a shade now. Kenshin was looking down.

"Let's enter, Aoshi."

Aoshi nodded.

Kaoru, Kenshin and Aoshi entered the house. Sanosuke stood outside.

Once again the little boy came their was and took them to a different room. Aoshi knew it would be a clinic room just like Megumi's. Yes, it was a clinic room but it was not identical to Megumi's. The old doctor was sitting on a chair and there was a different chair in front of him. On the back, there were many shelves containing books, medicines and empty bottles.

"Please, put her here on this chair." The old doctor pointed the other chair in front of him.

Aoshi first sat on the chair and he still had Megumi in his arms. He took the trench coat from around her body. Then he stood up and placed her on the chair.

"Now, please, pull that lever behind the right arm of the chair." The doctor asked again.

Aoshi saw the lever and pulled it. The chair leaned. It was good because it would keep Megumi from slipping and falling.

"Good. Would you please push the chair near me now?" the old doctor said once more.

"Yes."

Aoshi placed himself behind the chair and pushed it to the doctor's direction. Megumi was extremely near him now so he could examine her.

"Thank you very much, Shinomori-san."

Aoshi got surprised the old doctor knew his name.

Only then he remembered he had brought some things from Megumi's house with him.

"Oh, sensei, this is everything I could bring."

Aoshi showed him the small cup, the sheets and the three bottles.

"Hum... bring them here, Shinomori-san. Koji, bring that small table near me now."

The little boy came holding and pushing a small round table. Kenshin was close to him and decided to help. He took the table and put on the left side of the doctor's chair.

"Thank you, Himura-san. Please, Shinomori-san, place these objects here on the table."

Aoshi did what the old man said.

"Ok. We have a cup, three bottles of medicine and a bed cloth."

"Yes." Aoshi answered. "I found this cup near her arm on the place she was lying."

Aoshi was a bit ashamed to tell the details. What was a man doing at a lady's house so late at night? They were alone there and he dared entering her room while she was asleep. But he had to tell.

"These bottles of medicine were on her table at the clinic room. They seem to have been recently used, that's why I brought them here. And she was lying on the sheets. When I found out she was not almost breathing I noticed the blood stain."

"Hum..." the eyes of the doctor narrowed.

"But, Shinomori-san, there's not even a stain on her clothes!"

How would Aoshi tell he had changed her clothes? He closed his eyes.

"I changed her clothes!!!"

Everybody looked to the clinic door. It was Kaoru who had said that.

"She was wearing another thing but it had also the stains. I decided to change her clothes for a warmer kimono so Aoshi-san could bring her here. When Aoshi-san went to our house to ask for help, I overheard his chat with Kenshin and I rushed to her house while they two came here."

"Oh, I see." the doctor said.

Aoshi looked at Kaoru. The three of them (Kenshin, Kaoru and Aoshi) knew it was a lie she told to take him out of an embarrassing situation.

"So Kaoru also knows..." Aoshi thought.

The doctor bowed his body to check her temperature, breath and pulsation.

"Yes, she'd very cold indeed. That's bad. She's in a very deep sleep and it's not natural."

He observed and smelled the small cup. Then, he turned to the medicine bottles. He took them and smelled. He also dropped a small quantity of the liquids on the little cup and mixed them. He smelled and then took a sip from the mixture. His eyes narrowed.

"These are ingredients for a sleeping potion. Megumi is not a beginner. She is a great doctor so I believe she didn't make a mistake while mixing the ingredients. She probably made a very strong sleeping potion and drank it."

Everybody was silent. Kaoru looked very scared.

The doctor continued:

"Was she facing problems recently? Was she depressed? Was she healthy? Does any of you know of any facts that were affecting her this much?"

Kaoru noticed Aoshi's semblance.

"She'd been refusing to eat. Last week we found her unconscious on her house because there were days since she last ate something. And today she was not very well too. She knew a dear friend had passed away. She's been very sad lately... and... " Kaoru looked at Aoshi's face. She decided not to tell anything else, at least she could not tell more right there in front of him.

There was a shadow covering his eyes. He was looking to the floor and his fists were closed.

The old man had a very serious face.

"So, we could consider this a suicide attempt..."

They all were very shocked. Aoshi was stuck in the middle of them. It seemed he was feeling very bad.

"But is there any hope?" Kenshin asked.

"Well, I don't know yet. I don't know how much she drank from this. I don't know how physically weak she's now. She is thinner, I see, but I don't know if she has something else... I'll have to examine her properly."

Both Kaoru and Kenshin had sad and worried faces. They looked at Aoshi. His eyes were not visible.

Aoshi decided to leave the clinic room. He turned his back to everybody and said:

"Excuse me. I'll wait outside."

The doctor nodded.

He left the room.

"Me too." Kenshin came after him.

Only Kaoru stood inside the clinic room. Koji also left and closed the shouji door.

Aoshi walked outside.

This time Kenshin decided not to follow him. He stood inside with Koji.

Aoshi glanced the empty streets. There were some lights on. Sanosuke moved from the place he had been standing and entered the house. He stopped and glanced Aoshi's face. To get into the doctor's house, people had to go up three wooden steps from a small stairway. It was wet by the rain. Aoshi sat on the middle step. Sanosuke entered and stood near Kenshin.

"Is it like this? You abandon people to their worst and then you decide to come back like if nothing had happened?"

He had Sanosuke's words into his head. Many people were talking into his mind. He couldn't stop remembering the sentences he had heard. He hid his face on his hands.

"_Was she facing problems recently? Was she depressed? Was she healthy?" _

"So, we could consider this a suicide attempt..." 

He thought he was an evil being to her.

He remembered the scene when he was leaving. He was on the doorway. She was on the floor. So weak. And he left.

"My circle of regrets... I don't want this feeling. I don't want to feel it!"

His eyes were closed.

He remembered what he had thought right after that dream in the train:

"I abandoned everything... it's not easy to come back after so many years... my life time was spent like that..."

"That's me for a long time! I can't run away."

He had Hannya's face right before his closed eyes.

"C_losing yourself is not a good path. Give it a try. You know there are things you want to live, you want to show. You have always kept yourself into this shell, so much pain."_

Aoshi was feeling very strange. The last time he felt it he had become a shura. And now? No... the shura time was gone for good. He was trying to find his inner peace. He discovered he could feel. He could not become a demon and cause more suffering to people and to himself. Once he said he didn't care. But it was not true, he was just blind and haunted by those feelings.

"I want to find a way to escape... I want to turn cold ice in my soul... not to suffer? Not to suffer? But what is this now? What was that those times? It was cold as ice but it burned like hell. No mercy for me... These ghost I keep inside of me ...I want to be released from this cutting duality... shards of cutting glass into my soul."

Who is it that really dies when all the people look at me?

And I'm twisting my fingers in my hair

while a mirror reflects me

...

And the ghosts I keep inside myself

how do they see me?

again I'm drowning

with my soul, will you save me?

"Don't die, please, Megumi." he mumbled. "Don't let me die and the shura be born again."

XxXxXxXx

Sanosuke and Kenshin were watching Aoshi's agony. It was raining heavy once again.

"It's guilt and regret, Kenshin."

Kenshin had his eyes on Aoshi's back.

"The doctor said she could have tried to kill herself."

Sano opened his eyes wide.

"It's a pity she wants to die for him... I'd like to know what he's got for everyone wants to die for him."

"But he's also got feelings, Sano. I never thought I'd see him the way he's now. After the doctor's sentence, he got absolutely desolated."

"I see... he likes her. But I still think it's not enough for her..."

"Really? Remember when Oniwabanshuu members died? He stood like this. And they were loved by him."

Sano looked down.

"I just hope he doesn't become a shura again... some people wouldn't be able to bear it."

"I think this won't happen. Shinomori Aoshi seems to have found at least a small part of himself under all the pain and lack of emotions he carries inside. I was told he'd always been a very reserved person but he cared for his beloved ones. He cares for Megumi. And his care for the ones he likes will keep him from becoming a shura."

"Hum... weird way to care for people. Remember what he's done to her, to Okina and Misao..."

"About Okina and Misao, he was not Shinomori Aoshi that time. Remember he came back to them and he kept his respect and good feelings for both of them. He has his own way of caring and liking people but it doesn't take the value of his feelings. We can see it by his eyes. He respects Okina. He loves Misao, not the way she wants him to love her but he does love her. And I also get to think he loves Miss Megumi."

Sano sighed. The sentence _"And I get to think he loves Miss Megumi"_ was terribly haunting him.

"You said he loves Megumi..."

"Yes... I think he just discovered that he is able to feel it. Maybe he'll never say that but he just found something melting his icy heart. And believe me, Sano, it must hurt like hell."

XxXxXxXxXx

Aoshi put his hands into his pocket. There he found something. He took it out of there and opened his hands. It was his chain. He remembered she had taken hers off... he kept on looking to the red stone.

He was there also looking at his hands and the drops on them. Searching answers. He feels a great sadness into himself. That's not the answer.

The sky is pretty dark tonight.

And now the beat inside of me

It's a sort of a cold breeze

And I've never any feeling inside me

The rain was falling on him but he didn't mind it. He was soaked to the bones. The drops on his face looked like tears... maybe they were really tears, no one can tell. His soul was in a big struggle. His heart was beating less strong now.

"I'm afraid. I am worried. What's this inside of me? I'm the one who has no visible emotions. I never had."

"You're a man, Aoshi. And even if you keep the cold semblance, you know there are feelings buried inside of you. You can't kill them. One day they may be unleashed."

The chain was hanging on three of his fingers. He took his hands to his face to wipe the rain drops from there. He also passed his hands on his hair.

He lifted his face and looked the sky and the streets. Everything was very silent and empty, right the opposite of his soul.

He turned his head to look back into the house. He saw Kenshin and Sanosuke standing. He kept the chain into his pocket again.

Sanosuke and Kenshin found strange his face was clean once again, he was only frowning. He had pulled his hair back, but his bangs were starting to fall down again. There was no sign of the desperate man they saw some seconds ago. It seemed the shurea would come back. No, they looked into his eyes, they were not different, and they were not looking like a shura's eyes. It was only his icy wall that was built back.

Aoshi stood up but he didn't get out of the rain.

Suddenly a door opened inside and Koji entered. Some seconds later the boy left the clinic room smiling. He came running to the main room.

"Gandpa is done! Miss Megumi will be ok."

Kenshin opened a very big smile. Sanosuke did the same and jumped.

"Yes! Good strong fox lady!"

They both looked at Aoshi. Kenshin walked smiling.

"Aoshi! Aoshi! Koji just told us Miss Megumi will recover and be well."

Aoshi glanced Kenshin. His eyes were a clear beautiful blue. No shades, they were sublime.

"I know. I heard the boy saying that." His voice was calm and had the usual pitch.

Kenshin pierced him with his eyes.

"I saw you were worried."

Aoshi looked down. Sanosuke came and got closer too."

"Come on, Shinomori! Aren't you happy? Take this pain out of you! You don't feel the greatest pain of the world! Don't tell me you are not at least a bit happy Megumi will not die?"

Aoshi turned his back but his head was still turned to them.

"Yes, it's very good she'll recover. But you know nothing about pain, Sagara."

Both Kenshin and Sanosuke looked intrigued.

"The iceman is back. I almost believed you could become a normal person one day, Shinomori."

Sanosuke sighed and decided to enter the house again. He put his hand into his pockets and walked slowly.

"So, what's this great pain, Aoshi?" Kenshin asked.

Sanosuke stopped to listen to that.

"You know it, Himura..."

Himura placed his hand on Aoshi's shoulders.

He said with a big smile on his face:

"But you still have time and you still have the opportunity to change this. This servant was able to go over it. A strong man like you will be able to do it one day. Not the same way of other people but on your own way."

They could not see Aoshi's eyes now, he had turned his head to the front. Sanosuke was very curious to know what great pain was that one they were talking about.

"But come in, Aoshi. Miss Megumi will be able to return home soon."

XxXxXxXxXxXxXx

One of my favorite chapters!!!! It had been on my mind for a long time. I don't know if I could pass and show everything I wanted because it was made on many feelings, on many sad moments.

Oh, the verses are taken from songs! The long first piece was taken from "Veins Of Glass" a song performed by the Italian band Lacuna Coil on their first CD called In a Reverie. The second, this time only a verse, was taken from "Falling Again", a song by the same band and CD from the above. I am totally nuts for that song and it's the official soundtrack of this fic along with Herbal Movement performed by The Gathering!

Hope this chapter pleases you! And I am soooooooo happy more people decided to read/comment here. Thank you very much, thank you very much!!!! I surely appreciated!


	21. The Day After

Chapter XXI – The Day After

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi...) I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan who is going crazy because of this fan fiction... much relieved now... things seem to be flowing!

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

XxXxXxXx

Kenshin turned around and left Aoshi outside. Kaoru had also appeared on the front door and she had a relieving face. Sanosuke was also going in. The rain had become a soft drizzle.

"And then, Kaoru?"

"Oh, Kenshin, she'll be all right! I am so glad!"

Aoshi heard that. He walked timidly inside the house.

"Genzai-sensei is done with her! I came outside to take check if it were still raining. She can go home now!"

Kaoru had a big smile on her face.

Koji showed up again.

"Grandpa said that if any of you has something to ask him, feel free to enter."

They looked at each other's face. Aoshi was standing in the doorway.

Kaoru realized Aoshi's face had been back to normal. He had no feelings showing. It was quite impressive how fast he could recover.

"Don't you want to ask something, Aoshi-san?"

He looked around. It took some seconds until he answered.

"Uh, yes..."

"So come with me."

Kaoru entered the clinic room. Aoshi followed her steps. Kenshin and Sanosuke decided to do the same.

Genzai-sensei had a hint of a smile on his face.

"She'll stay well. It'll take a couple of days before she wakes up because she's very weak. But I prepared this medicine for her and it'll help a lot."

Aoshi looked at Megumi's face. Motionless.

"What about the blood?"

The doctor opened his eyes...

Kaoru glanced around... she seemed ashamed.

"Well, Shinomori-san... the blood... well, Kaoru-san assured me it was nothing."

Aoshi looked at Kaoru's face. She wanted to find a spot to hide it from his look.

"Oh..." he said.

"Is it still raining outside?"

"No, sensei." Sanosuke replied.

"Good, good! So you can take her home! But remember she needs constant assistance! She needs to have this medicine four times a day. She also needs to have soups to make her stronger."

Kaoru came closer.

"Don't worry, she'll be staying with us at the dojo."

"Perfect!" the old doctor said. "Here are her things." He said handing in the medicine bottles, the sheets and the small cup.

Aoshi approached and the doctor handed him Megumi's belongings.

"I can take her."

"Oh, good, Aoshi-san."

The others left the room. There was only Megumi, Aoshi and Genzai-sensei.

Before picking her in his arms, Aoshi took something from his pockets and placed on the table beside the doctor.

"Shinomori-san... it's not needed. I cannot accept."

Aoshi turned to him once again.

"Please, accept it."

"No, Miss Megumi is my friend. She was my assistant, I can't." he shook his head several times.

Aoshi looked at the doctor.

"I insist. I understand it's not that comfortable for you to work now. I see doctors generally run to the patient's house but you can't. I imagine there are not many patients that can be here to see you. I am not being rude, believe me. Accept this money at least to cover the medicine charge. I truly insist."

The old man had no chance to fight back. What Aoshi said was the plain truth. He sighed.

"Ok..."

Aoshi bowed and put Megumi on his arms. She was still pale and cold.

"Thank you very much... Genzai-sensei."

"You're welcome, Shinomori-san."

Aoshi crossed the door. The others were waiting for him outside. Koji was near the shouji door.

Aoshi passed by the boy and he smiled.

"Goodbye, everybody!" he closed the door.

Kaoru, Kenshin and Sanosuke were walking a bit ahead. Aoshi was on their way with Megumi in his arms. The rain had finally stopped. Suddenly, Kaoru stopped and looked behind.

"Aoshi-san?" Kaoru called his name.

"Yes..."

"Please, take her to the dojo. I am going to watch over her."

He didn't answer.

They continued walking until they arrived at the dojo. Kenshin rushed and opened the door.

"This way, please, Aoshi-san."

Kaoru was walking ahead. Kenshin and Sano didn't follow.

"Uh, Kaoru-san..." Aoshi was right behind her.

"Yes?" she turned to him.

He was looking at her face. His arms were firmly placed around Megumi's frail body.

"I'd like to take her home."

Kaoru looked surprised.

"But, she lives alone there! There's nobody to take care of her!" she gesticulated.

Aoshi had his mouth shut. He looked at Megumi's face. Kaoru was thoughtful.

"I could take care of her..."

"But, Aoshi-san, you have to return to Kyoto!"

"I can stay here a little longer. You have your child and this dojo to take care. If you'd tell me the right quantity of medicine and how I should proceed, I could be with her."

Kaoru didn't answer. She put her left hand her under her chin.

Aoshi was looking at her face.

"All right, then... I think there's no reason I shouldn't let you do this if you want it, ne?"

He nodded.

She took a small medicine bottle in her hands and got close to him.

"Excuse me, I'll place this on your pocket. It's her medicine. Give her 5 drops of this four times a day."

He nodded once more.

"Hum... there's only one problem... do you know how to cook? Are you able to prepare a soup?"

"Yes, I know how to cook and I am able to prepare a soup."

"So, there is no problem anymore. She has to eat too. So, prepare her some soups and give them to her as her meal." She said in a smile.

"Thank you, Kaoru-san."

"Oh, you're welcome."

Aoshi turned around and walked to the front door. Sanosuke was on his way.

"Where are you taking her, Shinomori?"

"Home, Sano." Kaoru's voice came from behind.

Sanosuke moved backwards.

"Hey! Wasn't she supposed to stay here???? Weren't you supposed to take care of her?"

Sanosuke was angry.

Kaoru smiled.

"Yes... but there's someone who'll watch carefully over her. Maybe better than I would."

Aoshi bowed his head and crossed the door. He could still hear Sanosuke arguing and Kaoru's silence about that issue.

Everything was still silent. It was dawn. He didn't know exactly what time it was but it was surely very very late at night, or early at dawn? He had no watch with him. He had a western one but it was with his suit into his bag at Megumi's house.

And he had to walk to her house. Now it was not raining anymore but the weather had become pretty chilly.

He crossed the garden and opened the door. It was rather difficult to do that but he could manage it. He entered her room and placed her on her futon. She was home again and she'd be all right.

He felt relieved.

Then, it was time to do what he planned before leaving: taking a nice warm bath. He was soaked to the bones and very cold too. Furthermore, his legs were killing him.

He heated up the water he had left on the bins and went to the bathroom. He undressed and washed himself before entering the bathtub. His limbs seemed to thank that warm water. He closed his eyes, held his breath and dove his head into the water. So warm, so nice. It was just like the sensation he had. Before, everything was cold, weird feelings rising. Now, he seemed softer, relieved, light. A heavy weight had been taken from his back. His head emerged. He could stay in that tub forever. In fact, he was feeling so tired he dozed off right there.

He had a warm sensation inside...

Aoshi didn't know how long he had been there. He looked at his fingers and they were wrinkled. He must have spent a rather long time into the water. He left the tub and reached for a towel. He dressed a black yukata and walked back to the bedroom in slow steps.

She hadn't moved an inch.

Then he went to the clinic room. He had scratches and bruises to heal. He never minded about that stuff but this time they were made by some thorns and if he let them inside, they'd sure bring an infection and the scratches would swell. He also had black marks near his ankles and his knees. While on the woods he had stumbled and hit his legs many times due the darkness. Ouch! They were hurting. He browsed the shelves until he saw a familiar pot. He knew inside there was a balsam that would help him healing the bruises and scratches. He felt a sting at first, then, he would feel the wounded are freshen. It would also avoid scars.

After taking care of his wounds, Aoshi returned to the bedroom to check Megumi.

She had moved! He had left her lying with her belly up, now she was lying with her belly down, one hand on the futon, the other one, under the pillow. Yet, she was there, looking lifeless. But her breath was stronger now and her skin had a light warmth.

He sat on the futon, stretching his legs, his back on the wall. He sighed and looked up. His mind was empty that time, he was so tired.

He noticed some birds chirping outside. There were few birds, though. The sun would rise in half hour or so. He looked at Megumi.

He focused his blue eyes on her. He was staring. Yes, he was staring. How many times had he done that? He didn't know! He thought it was really the first time he was staring that way. If she were up, she'd certainly blush. She was wearing a lavender kimono, no socks. Her hair was untied and falling over her shoulders, spreading on her back, coming down to gently touch the futon. Her long straight raven dark hair. She was certainly a beautiful woman, many people surely thought that. Yes, he also thought she was good looking but he never paid attention to really see her beauty. And she was really attractive even like that, sleeping. She didn't look like a fox at all. She was so innocent sleeping. Her skin was very white, whiter than usual. He looked at her hand opened on the futon. Delicate. Her thin brows and long eyelashes. He tried to remember her eyes. Dark eyes. And her look? He remembered it used to be teasing and rather happy since she escaped from Kanryuu's mansion. But when he first saw her at that damned mansion he noted she had sad eyes. Lately he almost could not notice her eyes anymore, they were always down with a cold fading light into them. His eyes went down on her face. Well done thin nose, pale cheeks and her mouth. He had kissed that mouth many times, but he never really focused on it before. Her lips were beautiful without the red lipstick, they had a pale pinkish color. They helped making up the angel like figure he saw lying on the futon.

Weird, uh? Yes... pretty weird. Why was he only observing that now? And why was he observing that? It didn't really match with him but he couldn't help. He wanted to gaze her that way.

The birds were chirping louder and surely there were more birds outside. But he didn't stand up. He stood there, sitting near her, watching if she would move.

He had a strange will of being there with her. He knew he needed to go back to Kyoto but he wouldn't let her like that again, it wouldn't be fair.

Some time later, he decided it was late enough, the sun was up. He stood up and walked to the kitchen. Yes, he was starving but she should have been much starving than him so, instead of preparing his breakfast, he got some vegetables, chopped them in very small pieces and cooked them. He put some salt and spice. Yes, it was smelling good. Meanwhile, he also boiled water for his morning tea and he decided to try some western cookies and loafs they had bought two days ago in the market. Oh, they tasted good! Megumi hadn't tried them yet, the packages were closed. He saw the soup was ready. The vegetables had melted. He put the soup on a bowl and took it to her bedroom.

First, Aoshi placed the bowl on the floor so he could sit down and take her in his arms. He lifter her body and gently opened her mouth with his fingers. Then, he made her drink the soup slowly so it wouldn't dirt her.

The soup was gone. Now he had to give her medicine. Aoshi did just like Kaoru had said. He got a handkerchief and cleaned her mouth. He didn't lay her down immediately. He stood with her some time in his arms. He could feel her body was regaining its warmth, it was almost normal again.

He hadn't slept at night, his body was almost forcing him to take a nap. He leaned against the wall once again without losing grip of Megumi and rested his chin and the side of his jaw on her head. He held her and fell asleep.

XxXxXxXxXx

There were people on the streets now. Slowly, Aoshi opened his eyes. It was very bright inside. The day was warm and full of light. One hand came to his eyes and rubbed them. He looked down and saw her there. She was still asleep.

Carefuly, Aoshi put Megumi aside and stood up. He was curious to know what time would that be. It was really late and it was strange for him because he was used to waking up very early.

He saw his bag and opened it. He searched inside for that western watch and he found it. Very late indeed, 10:20 am. That's why people were so noisy outside.

What would he do now? He didn't feel like meditating. Megumi was asleep, there was nobody to talk to. But even when she was not asleep, they never really talked much. Would he cook lunch now? 10:20 pm? No, it was early for that and he was not a catastrophe on the kitchen that it would take him more than one hour to prepare a soup and a plain meal. Origami? No... Aoshi was roaming inside. And then he saw a broom.

"Oh, that's what I am going to do."

Aoshi got the broom and started sweeping the main room. It made him remember of Kenshin. And once he asked Kenshin why he did the laundry and the works. He was doing almost the same. But he didn't mind, it'd help him killing time. People at Aoiya would surely be shocked if they would see that scene. But it was not that bad. He swept the main room, the clinic room, the kitchen, the bathroom, the meditation room and the guest room. He only didn't enter Megumi's bedroom not to have to move her from one place to another. He decided to let her quiet there.

He looked at the watch. 11:35 am. Yes, now he could prepare lunch. He did the same thing he had done early in the morning. Boiled water, chopped vegetables to extremely small pieces. It was even fun chopping vegetables. He discovered Megumi had a knife that was almost the same size of his kodachis. He wondered what was that for... but he decided to pick the big knife and chop the vegetables; it was almost like using a sword down, if you put in your mind these are not enemies running at you with a blade on. He started thinking of Kenshin as a Vegetable Battousai. Stupid... what was happening with him that he could even think of stupidities like those? He shook his head in disapproval.

He took the soup to her along with her medicine. He did the same thing he had done in the morning. Then, he put her body down again. And now? He was not sure of what to prepare for his own lunch. He thought of leaving and having lunch somewhere else but he wouldn't do that with Megumi there. She could wake up at any moment and he wanted to be there. He went back to the kitchen and looked up for something... soba... Saitou's favorite meal... yes, he'd go for a soba now.

XxXxXxXx

In the afternoon, there was the same thing, he prepared her soup and gave her medicine. He started getting worried she wouldn't wake up. But... the doctor said it could take a couple of days.

Aoshi decided to open the back door and go outside. He'd wash the dishes now and he would wash his clothes and Megumi's clothes too. He looked for the soap and took a full bin of water out of the well. First, he washed the dishes. When they were done, he started washing ht clothes. He was there washing the clothes when he heard a noise coming from the front door. Normal-sensed people wouldn't notice it, but he was onmitsu.

He let the clothes there and walked to the front door. His hands were wet and full of soap. He got to the door and opened it. Oh, it was Kenshingumi.

"Hello Aoshi-san!"

"Hello." he answered.

"May we come in?" Yahiko asked.

"Yes..." Aoshi came out of their way so they all could enter.

"Thank you."

They entered. There were Kenshin, Kaoru, Saosuke, Kenji and Yahiko. They were all very smiley except for Sanosuke.

"How is Megumi doing?" Kaoru asked.

"Uh, better. Her temperature is almost normal."

"She didn't wake up..."

"Not yet but she moved this morning."

"Good, ne, Kenshin?"

Kenshin smiled and nodded.

"Are you feeding her, Shinomori?"

Aoshi didn't look at Sanosuke.

"Of course."

"Aoshi-san is taking good care of Megumi!" Kaoru said. "Can I take a look at her, Aoshi-san?"

"Sure. This way, please."

Aoshi took Kaoru to Megumi's bedroom. Kenshin stood with Kenji and the others there on the main room. He opened the shouji door and Kaoru went inside.

"Oh, she's even a bit blushed!"

Aoshi didn't reply. He was standing by the door.

Kaoru bowed to touch her neck and check her temperature.

"Yes, she's surely warmer. I hope she won't take long to wake up."

"Yes."

Meanwhile, Yahiko noticed the back door was opened. He went there to check and he saw clothes to be washed and some others hanging to dry. He also saw the clean washed dishes.

This time Kaoru and Aoshi were returning from the bedroom.

"Oh... Aoshi-san... he's almost a Kenshin." Yahiko whispered to Sanosuke. "Guess what! He was washing clothes and dishes before we arrive!"

Aoshi looked at him. He surely heard that clearly.

"What?"

Yahiko felt his skin crawling. He looked behind and there was Aoshi.

"Oh, nothing. I just wonder why strong men make such..." he decided to shut up due to Aoshi's eyes on him.

Kenshin had an oro face.

"Ehrm... so, everything is doing great here, Aoshi-san must be busy, he has to watch over Megumi... let's go folks..." Kaoru said. She was really blushed.

She walked to the door, the others followed her way. Aoshi thanked the visit and closed the door.

XxXxXx

Outside, Yahiko was talking:

"I never imagine I could see Shinomori Aoshi doing the dishes or the laundry... gosh, this world is going crazy!!!"

XxXxXxXxXx

Crazy chapter?! Yes, I know... it was doing nice but there was a time I couldn't hold myself anymore... but I promise I'll be normal again next chapter!!!!

/kiss crossed fingers.


	22. Expected Unexpected

Chapter XXII – Expected/ Unexpected.

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi...) I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan who is going crazy because of this fan fiction... come on, mon ami.

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

XxXxXxXx

" GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMPS!!!!!!!"

Misao was almost hysterical. She was helping out at Aoiya when a young man entered and handed her a paper.

She thanked the man and went inside to read it.

_Tokyo, first day of spring._

I was told you already know the cause of my departure. The war in Hokkaido is over and I am arriving in Kyoto in no longer than one week.

_Shinomori Aoshi._

The customers at Aoiya got very scared with Misao's screams.

Okon had a hard time going from table to table to tell them everything was ok. Once she had finished, she ran to Misao.

"Are you crazy, Misao? You almost killed a dozen people including me right now!!!"

Misao didn't mind her words, she was jumping without getting out of place, a biiiiiig smile on her face, eyes closed and very blushed cheeks. She had a paper squeezed on her hands.

"Oh, how good, how good, how good!!!"

Okon put her hand on her waist and came furious towards Misao:

"What's happening to you, girl?"

Misao stopped jumping and showed Okon the paper.

"Do you see this??? It's from Aoshi-samaaaaaaaaaa!"

Okon widened her eyes and also smiled.

"Oh!!!! So the war is over, he's safe!" she clasped her hands together.

"YEEEEEEES!!!!"

Misao started jumping again. Okon shook her head...

"Where's gamps?"

Okon replied:

"I don't know, he left very early this morning and he didn't return yet."

"Oh, I am sooooooo happy, Okon! "

"Everybody sees it, Misao."

"Today is the fifth day of spring, right?"

Okon nodded.

"Aoshi-sama posted it on the first day of spring. He told he'd not take longer than one week to arrive here from Tokyo, so, he's coming tomorrow or the day after tomorrow!!! Isn't this wonderful?"

Okon had no choice but to agree with Misao. It was good Okashira was safe for sure.

"Oh, I'll prepare his bedroom and buy things he likes right now!!" she left running.

"Misao, wait!!! Who's going to help me here with the costumers? The restaurant is full!!!"

Misao glanced behind, she had a childish look.

"I am sorry but I can't help when the subject is about Aoshi-sama!"

She left running and let a furious Okon there, full of trays, alone in the full restaurant.

XxXxXxXx

Aoshi opened his eyes and looked around. He was into what they now called meditation room. He had slept there. It was very early in the morning, the sun was already up but there was only silence around. He sat on the tatami. He was still sleepy. He rubbed his eyes and passed his hands through his hair. Another day had passed.

Aoshi stood on his feet and went to a small window inside the room. He opened it and put his head outside, taking a deep breath.

"Morning pure scent."

He observed the nature around him. There were several birds flying happily, the trees still had dew on their leaves. The sakura flowers were letting everything happier and more beautiful with their light pink color. The sky had a light blue shade with yellow strands, not many clouds.

He decided to drink a warm cup of herbal tea. On his way to the kitchen, he stopped by Megumi's room and opened the shouji door.

She was there, lying on the futon but she had turned her back to the door. Aoshi walked slowly and silently into her room and passed to the other side. He knelt near her. Her eyes were closed. She was breathing normally and her body was warm enough.

"Good, Megumi, you're recovering!"

Aoshi left the bedroom and walked to the kitchen. He'd do the usual, boil water, chop vegetables, prepare her soup, his tea and give her the medicine.

"Today is the sixth day of spring. She should already be up. I am going to wait up to tomorrow before going back at Genzai-sensei's place."

He walked to the bedroom and gave her the soup and the medicine.

He heard someone crossing the garden, the person would knock on the door soon. He guessed it was not one of Megumi's friends because he could recognize their steps. It could only be a patient for her. He already had to tell four or five away these two days.

Aoshi walked to the door. Before the person could knock, he answered.

"Yes?"

It was a young woman. She was looking very desperate.

"Takani-sensei. I need to talk to Takani-sensei!"

"Takani-sensei is ill, miss, she can't leave her bed."

The girl frowned more. Aoshi saw she became even more desperate.

"Isn't it even possible to talk to her?"

Aoshi shook his head.

"I am sorry, but I fear it's not possible. Since Takani-sensei got ill, she hadn't been up. She's still sleeping for she's very weak."

The girl got even sadder.

"Oh, I see... excuse me, sir..." she went walking sadly.

Aoshi stepped outside.

"Wait, miss."

The girl turned around. She should be Misao's age but, unlike Misao, she didn't look like a child but like a grown up woman.

"What is the problem?" he asked her.

"My mother. She fell into an empty well and she broke her legs..."

Aoshi looked at the girl.

"Wait just a second for me. I'll change my clothes, I'll get some necessary medicine and I'll go help your mother."

A big smile appeared on the girl's face.

"Really???"

Aoshi nodded.

"I am waiting here. Thank you very much, sensei!!!"

Aoshi rushed into the house. He took off the yukata he was wearing and put a dark blue standard suit on. He didn't take his trench coat. He passed by the clinic room and got some medicine he was familiarized with. He had some knowledge on how to immobilize limbs that had been broken, how to remove bullets from wounds and these stuff related to battles. He got Megumi's medicine box, one of his bags and left the house. The girl was waiting for him outside. She had a long braided black hair, big dark eyes and she was wearing a blue kimono. It made him think of Misao. But this girl was taller and less child looking than Misao.

"Shall we go, miss?"

"Sure, sensei."

The girl was walking fast, leading the way. Aoshi was just following her.

"For how long is your mother in the well?"

"For almost one hour now, sensei."

"Did you talk to her?"

"Yes, sensei."

"So it means she didn't faint."

"No, sensei."

"That's good."

Aoshi got the feeling of how Megumi should feel being a doctor. It was a great responsibility.

After a short run, they arrived at a small house near the woods. Aoshi pointed two small children crying by a well.

"These are my brothers, Masanobu and Shuuichi." the girl said to Aoshi.

She turned to the children.

"Don't cry, children... mom is going to be alright. Sensei..." she turned to him, frowning for she didn't know his name yet.

"Shinomori Aoshi." he said.

"Shinomori-sensei is going to save her."

Aoshi got closer to the well. He looked inside and he could see a figure dressed in fading green on the bottom. The well was not very deep.

"What's the name of your mother, miss?"

"Takakura Mao. And I also didn't say my name. I am Takakura Saeko. "

Aoshi put his head into the well

"Takakura-san?"

A voice came from inside.

"Yes??? Who are you?"

"Shinomori Aoshi. I came to help you."

Aoshi went to his bag and got one of his kodachi and a very long rope. He noticed Saeko and the children looked at him pretty surprised. Maybe a bit scared by the kodachi. He knew it was forbidden to carry one sword around and these children probably had never seen a blade on their lives.

He stabbed the kodachi deeply on the stone walls of the well. He tied the rope on the kodachi and also tied it around his waist.

"I am going down now."

Saeko and the children approached running.

"Take care sensei."

Aoshi went down the wall. Oh the bottom he could see an older woman sitting by.

"Oh, thanks for helping, Shinomori-sensei."

"Saeko-san told me your legs are broken."

"Yes... I can't move."

There was space enough for Aoshi to be standing up. He knelt and took the woman on his arms.

"Excuse me, Takakura-san."

He turned his back and asked her to come and hold his neck. He bowed. Once she grabbed hold of his neck, he tied the rope around their bodies, involving his waist and her back. He made sure it was a tight knot.

"Hold tight."

"Hai, Shinomori-sensei."

Aoshi stood up. He noticed the woman had moaned.

"Try not to slide down, do not lose grip of my body."

She passed her arms around his chest, under his arms so she wouldn't suffocate him and it would be easier for her to hold tight.

Aoshi stared climbing back the walls. It was not difficult, he had already done similar things many times before.

He could see the children's faces up.

He finally managed to leave the well, the woman tied to his back. He bowed once again and asked Saeko to untie the rope so her mother could be released.

The woman was on the floor now. Aoshi stood up and came to her. He took her in his arms.

"Come inside, Shinomori-sensei!"

Saeko and the children rushed inside the house and led him to a bedroom.

"Place mom on the futon, please."

Aoshi did so.

"Wait a second. I am going outside to take my things and Takani-sensei's medicine box."

"Hai."

He walked outside and removed his kodachi from the stone wall, packed it again into his bags along with the rope and got the medicine box. He entered the house again.

"Please, Saeko-san, bring me hot water and clean cloths."

"Yes, Shinomori-san."

The girl rushed out of the bedroom.

The two younger children were still around.

Aoshi approached the woman.

"Excuse-me, Takakura-san."

He knelt down and lifted up her kimono so he could see her legs. They had many cuts, scratches and bruises. Her left knee was extremely black and very swollen. Her face had some scratches too; her kimono was dirty with dust and blood. Her hands had also many bruises.

"You had your left knee broken, Takakura-san"

He opened the medicine box and got the balsam.

In some minutes, Saeko entered the room with a bin containing hot water and the clean cloths Aoshi had asked.

"Here you are, sensei."

Aoshi wetted the cloths on the hot water and cleaned the bruises from the woman's body carefully. Later on, he got the balsam and massaged it on, covering the wounds with a bandage. For the broken knee, he made a tourniquet. Forty minutes later, he was done with everything. He also gave her some drops of a pain reliever. Then, he kept the things inside the box and stood up.

"It's going to keep you from walking, Takakura-san. But look for a doctor in two weeks."

"Hai! Thank you very much, Shinomori-sensei. Saeko is going to pay you."

"No, please, I can't accept any kind of money for this. I am not a physician. I just came to help because your daughter went to Takani-sensei's house asking for her help and I was there. But as Takani-sensei is ill and couldn't come, so I decided to come and check if I could help."

She looked surprised.

"Oh, I hope Takani-sensei will be fine soon. I know her, she's a good woman, an excellent doctor. I really thought Saeko would bring her here, she went for Takani-sensei, but it was very good you could come to help, Shinomori,sensei. Thank you very very much! Even not being a physician, you know how to take care of people. Are you also taking care of Takani-sensei, right?"

He nodded.

"You're a very kind man. It's good to know Takani-sensei's got such a caring husband. I wish my Saeko-chan will find someone like you, Shinomori-sensei"

The girl was glancing Aoshi and she blushed when she heard those words from her mother. She was thinking the same thing. Takani-sensei was very lucky to have such a handsome, good and caring husband.

"I am not her husband. Just a very old friend."

Saeko blushed even more.

Aoshi walked to the door.

"Take care, Takakura-san. Goodbye children."

"Goodbye, Shinomori-san!"

Aoshi left the room.

"I'll take you outside, Shinomori-sensei." Saeko said.

"Thank you."

He left. But he realized the girl had her eyes on him.

He thought Megumi must feel very happy being a doctor. On his first attempt of helping someone 'professionally', he had felt useful. That's why she loved being a doctor.

It would be almost midday now, he had to rush. He still had to prepare Megumi's soup, give her medicine. And he had spent almost two hours out of home. He really had to run.

He arrived at Megumi's house and opened the door. He kept the medicine box on the clinic room and went to Megumi's sleeping place. She was there, asleep. He sighed.

He decided to wash himself before cooking. He had blood and dust on his clothes, skin and hair.

Only after washing himself and wearing clean clothes, Aoshi stepped into the kitchen. It was midday sharp, he heard the cannon.

He got water and boiled it. He also got the vegetables to chop them.

XxXxXxXx

I stretched my body on the futon. Wow, it was hurting a lot. It seemed I had been beaten. My eyes were hurt by the light. I lifted my hands to rub them.

My mouth was pretty dry and it tasted sour. I had to gather strength to sit down on the futon. My back was hurting so much! I also had a strong headache.

Suddenly, my heart started beating faster. I had heard noises coming from my house. The bedroom door was opened. I looked at my clothes. Strange. I was pretty sure I was not wearing that kimono. I remember wearing a light yellow yukata before going to sleep. But the noises were scaring me. I was supposed to be alone! I was alone last night. Who would be there into my house?

I tried to stand up. It was pretty hard. I had to crawl to the door before I could be on my feet. I got my dagger, one I always kept near in case I needed it, and left the bedroom.

I was afraid. My eyes were hurting and my vision was blurred. I tiptoed slowly, the dagger in my hand. The noise continued. It was coming from the kitchen.

I walked across the hallway edging at the wall. I held my breath when I got to the kitchen door; it was opened but I could not see inside. The noise stopped, a shadow moved into the kitchen, it was coming in my direction. I lifted the dagger and closed my eyes, my heart was beating faster and faster.

A hand held the blade. I opened my eyes. Blood started dropping. It was a male hand.

From the kitchen, wearing a navy blue yukata and with wet hair, a tall figured emerged. It was Aoshi.

My eyes widened. I let the dagger slip from my hand to the floor.

"A... Aoshi..."

He had no painful semblance. His eyes had a pure blue light. His other hand was holding the blooded one.

"You finally woke up."

XxXxXxXx

Hum... don't know what to say about this chapter... or the next one... hum... weird...

I love music, music is a holy big part of my life and I always have a mental soundtrack on everything I do, so, I guess that's why I manage to fit songs on what I am writing and I get very glad you appreciate it! Wow, this day I really had inspiration, I wrote 3 chapters in a row (previous, current and next ones). When I finished this chapter I really didn't know what to say about it. Now I think it's different. I never thought of Aoshi doing such things... but it was to take some o f the drama away for I was in a happy moment when I wrote it.

Oh, and about guys getting sweet when they watch Meg sleep. Well, that's because it's Meg and Meg RULES! I can't say it from experience but I think he'd be pretty scary with me sleeping, unless it was Aoshi so I would try not to sleep at all !


	23. Bittersweet

Chapter XXIII – Bittersweet

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi...) I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan who is going crazy because of this fan fiction...

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

XxXxXxXx

I looked at his face. I was completely dumbfounded.

"I... I am sorry... I hurt you."

I got closer and took his blooded hand.

"Let's go to the clinic room, let me take a look at this."

"There's no problem, Megumi."

I still had my eyes blurred and my body was almost keeping me from walking a bit faster but I tried to walk firmly to the clinic room. There was clean water there. I washed his hand. There was much blood!

"Does it hurt a lot?" I said without looking at him.

"No." he gave me a plain answer.

I turned to the shelf to get some clean bandages and medicine when I noticed he had his eyes on me. Wait, he was staring! "Since when does Aoshi-sama stares at someone like that?" I was so ashamed.

I smiled.

"I am dreaming!"

He raised one eyebrow, his hand into the blooded water bowl.

"Why?"

I came closer once again and took his hand. I dried the palm with a clean cloth.

"Because you are not here!"

I put some medicine on his hand. He frowned.

"Sh..."

"Does it hurt?"

"No... only burns a bit."

"Sorry... but it'll be ok. But you could have easily dodged this one."

"I know."

I took the bandage and wrapped his hand with it.

"It's done." I smiled.

"How are you?" he asked.

"I'm fine, thanks. And you?"

He surely didn't expect that answer.

"Fine?"

"Yes... for a dream..."

I felt my legs weak. I had to sit down on a chair nearby.

"You insist this is a dream."

"Yes... you left this house yesterday afternoon and went to Kyoto. Chances are you're on your way right now and not here in front of me!"

He rolled his eyes.

"Aa."

Terrible headache.

"What are you doing here?"

"Taking care of you." he answered patiently.

This time I raised my brows.

"Why?"

Aoshi smelled something and turned his back to me.

"The soup is ready."

"Soup, this time? It's morning yet!"

He walked to the door.

"It's already past midday and the soup is for you."

I stood up but my legs couldn't stand my weight. He turned around and held me.

"You're still very weak."

I noticed he had passed his arms around my body.

"Wait. What are you going to do?"

"I'll take you to your room."

He lifted me in his arms.

"But, your wound! It'll bleed more!"

"Nevermind."

He walked the hallway with me into his arms. He arrived in the bedroom and put me on the futon.

"My body hurts..."

"You spent three days lying on this futon."

"WHAT??? So, this is not a dream?"

"No." he walked outside.

"Where are you going?"

He didn't turn to me but he replied from there.

"To the kitchen. I'll bring your soup."

My stomach was hurting a lot. I was probably hungry. He told me there were three days I was lying on the futon. Three days??? No, he couldn't have gone to Kyoto and come back in three days. So what had happened???

Aoshi stepped into the bedroom again. He had a bowl of soup with him. It was smelling good. He sat near me and passed me the bowl.

"Are you hungry?"

"I think so..."

It was the second time he was staring at me... I blushed completely.

"Am I looking bad?"

"No."

"Uh..." I took a sip from the soup. "Aoshi-sama... why aren't you in Kyoto?"

He sighed. I realized he had some very thin healing scratches near his chin and one on his right cheek.

"Well, I decided not to go there. I got the train and I was twenty five kilometers away but I decided to return here."

"Why?"

"I felt I had to do that. When I arrived I found you here, fainted."

I raised both brows. I was holding the bowl with both hands close to my lips.

"Fainted?"

"Yes... you know it."

In fact, I didn't. I had absolutely no idea of what was going on there. Everything was new.

"Tell me. I have no idea of what you're talking about!"

He had suspicious eyes on me.

"I took you to Genzai-sensei. You were cold and you could not breath properly."

I was quiet. Oh... so the sleeping potion I drank made all that mess!

"He said you had tried to kill yourself by drinking a very strong sleeping potion. It made everybody worried, Megumi. But he told us to take care of you and give you proper medicine that you'd be all right."

"Oh" I thought. "I was so weak my body couldn't take such a strong potion. And he had stayed to watch over me... wow... I am surprised by all of that."

"Did Genzai-sensei say something else???"

"No."

"Who else was there with you?"

"Himura, Kaoru-san and Sagara."

I ended up having the soup. He took the bowl from my hands. His fingers softly brushed mine.

"Please, Megumi, don't EVER do or think of that again."

He stood on his feet and walked outside.

"I'll prepare your bath."

I was alone in my room.

"So, they think I tried to kill myself. Oh, I didn't! But I had never seen Aoshi-sama so worried about me that way and I felt important. Should I tell him I didn't try to end up my life?"

He returned some minutes later.

"Have you had your lunch?"

"I am not hungry, Megumi. Come, your bath is ready" he reached out his hand.

He helped me walking to the bathroom. I entered and closed the door.

"I am right here if you need something, right?"

"Aa." I answered from inside.

I untied the blue kimono and let it fall. I walked slowly to the tub and bowed to make it easy to get into it.

"Aoshi-sama?"

"Yes?" he said from behind the door.

"Were there many patients here these days?"

"Hum... six, I guess."

"Oh. I feel worried and sorry for that."

"I... I helped a young woman this morning. She came here looking for you but I could do something to help her."

"Wow." I thought. But it was a young woman. I felt jealous.

I spent some time without saying a word. I left the tub and dressed a white yukata he had taken for me.

Noticing I'd leave the bathroom, he opened the door.

"How was that? Who did you help?"

"A young woman called Takakura Saeko. Her mother fell into a well and had a broken knee. I went there, rescued her and immobilized her knee."

I knew Saeko and her mother as well as the little brothers.

He was escorting me to my room.

"Wow! You'd make a nice assistant."

He didn't say anything.

We entered the room and I looked for my hairbrush. I sat on the futon and started brushing my hair.

Aoshi sat right behind me.

"Let me do it."

I looked surprised, but I decided to let him do that. His stretch hand, waiting for me to hand in the brush, was right over my right shoulder.

"Aa."

I was ashamed but I handed him the hairbrush. He started brushing my wet hair in a very soft and careful way. It was wonderful to feel his breath right there near me, the warmth that was coming from his body. He was also running his fingers through my hair and they would sometimes meet my nape and back in a very gentle way. I closed my eyes.

I sensed he came closer because I could feel his breath on my head. Did he smell the strands of my hair or was it me who was imagining things?

"Uh. Aoshi-sama?"

"Yes?"

"I hope you are not upset with me because of what happened."

His deep voice came out of him.

"I really got upset with the facts but..." he paused.

"But?" I asked.

I just heard him breathing.

"But I am quite glad you're here with me now."

I smiled. I was sure he hadn't seen it because he was behind me. But I was smiling inside and my face was burning too.

He put the hairbrush on the futon.

"I'm done with this."

"Thank you."

"Megumi, I was thinking that this futon can be a bit uncomfortable to you. I... I was thinking on buying you a western bed. What do you think?"

"A western bed?" I had seen some before, I thought they were really posh."

"I think they are beautiful."

"So, if you're feeling better, we could go and buy one tomorrow afternoon. And we could also leave and walk a bit."

"Really? So, you're not going to Kyoto on tomorrow's train?"

"No. I am staying here."

I turned to him. I was sure my eyes were shining.

"For how long?"

"I don't know, until I feel it's time to go."

There were fireworks inside of me now, all of them going up and exploding. So, he would stay.

I smiled to him, knowing he wouldn't smile back. He nodded, only.

"Do you want to go outside? I'll take some time there washing some clothes."

"Washing clothes???" I was pretty surprised.

"Yes. There's much housework to be done."

"No, what about your hand? It's rather a big cut, it's not good to deal with water and soap."

He didn't listen to me. Well, he did, but he didn't mind.

We walked outside to the backyard.

It was pretty curious to watch him doing housework. I was there, sat on the grass. He didn't let me wash not even a bowl. I insisted his wound would bleed and would get swollen. Sometimes he'd go into the kitchen and spend sometime there, mixing some things, baking something. Then, he'd return outside.

He took the whole afternoon there. When the weather started to chill, he took me inside.

"It's time to go in. You're not that healthy yet."

I noticed the house was very clean. And I got very shocked it was Aoshi the responsible for that. I could never imagine the Okashira, the one people died for, lived for serving could also clean houses with perfection.

"Oh , Aoshi-sama, you took care of my house ten times better than me! I never imagined you could do these things! This house had never been so organized"

"Oh...I suppose this is a praise. And I think a person should know a bit of everything."

"Yes... be sure it is." I ran my eyes all over the house. Aoshi would make a good household too! But I didn't dare to remark loudly.

He started boiling a great quantity of water. There was a tray with fresh baked loafs just around.

"What's this much water for?"

"Tea."

"But... only for the two of us?"

"Kenshingumi will come here in no time"

I looked at him.

"Really?"

He nodded.

"They come here everyday to know if you are fine."

"I do have precious friends!"

Aoshi's eyes narrowed. He took some loafs out of the tray and put them on a bigger bowl. He also got some candies and a cake.

"What's wrong, Aoshi-sama?"

"They are arriving."

I could not hear or sense anything. But he said they were coming, so it must be true.

Aoshi walked to the front door. He opened it.

"Oh! Aoshi-san! You were already expecting our visit, right?"

He nodded.

"Come in."

They looked at the house. It was perfectly clean. A nice smell of food was coming out of the kitchen.

Kaoru asked.

"How's Megumi today, Aoshi-san?"

A woman dressed in white showed up from the kitchen. Absolutely smiley.

"Hello, I am here!"

They all widened their eyes.

"MEGUMI!!!"

"It's so nice you finally woke up!"

"Yes, you don't know how worried we all were, fox lady!"

"Aoshi-san took good care of you!"

I was pretty happy to see them all there and to see very big smiles on their faces.

"Yes, he did, ne Aoshi-sama?"

Yahiko and Sanosuke laughed.

"But, let's sit down. Aoshi-sama just prepared us a snack. He knew you were coming." I was going to the kitchen.

"Sit down, Megumi. You're still a bit dizzy. I'll bring everything." Aoshi said seriously.

"I'll help him." Kenshin added.

XxXx

It was a warm meeting. Everybody seemed very happy. Only Aoshi was silent and quiet as usual. When everybody had eaten to the fullest, I asked Kaoru to come to my room. I closed the door

"Kaoru, I need to tell you something."

"Yes?"

"I didn't try to kill myself as you all think. But I didn't have courage to tell this to Aoshi-sama. I don't know why."

She widened her eyes.

"Aoshi-san was desperate."

"Really???" I was shocked.

"Yes. I never thought I'd see feelings coming from him but we all saw the way he was. He ran twenty-five kilometers, fought Sanosuke and got soaked to the bones on a very heavy rain only because of you. He was very worried."

I was baffled.

"Oh, I can't believe it!"

"Believe me. Kenshin and Sanosuke were near him all the time and they saw it with their own eyes. He does care for you, Megumi."

"But... it's too late. I decided to give up this relationship. I can't stand anymore. Neither can he."

She walked around.

"I can't understand you at all. I just told you the way he reacted and it doesn't seem to get to you. Worse, now when you seem to have everything, you just want to give up!!! No, I really don't understand!"

Kaoru didn't say anything else. I stood quiet for some seconds. She had her eyes on me.

"Kaoru... I want to ask you if I bled."

She looked down.

"You did."

I frowned.

"A lot?"

"No... when Aoshi-san found you, you were bleeding but it stopped soon after that."

I looked up and smiled.

"Thanks to heaven! The baby is safe then!"

We heard steps right behind us. Aoshi-sama knocked on the door.

"Megumi? Kaoru-san?"

I got pretty scared. Kaoru too.

"Hi?" Kaoru got closer to the door.

"Kenji fell asleep and Himura said it's already evening, so you'd better get going home before it's totally dark."

"Oh, yes!"

Kaoru opened the door. We looked at Aoshi's face. It was the same face as usual.

He focused his eyes on me. He surely noticed I had gotten scared. I was there, leaning on the wall, hands on it, my head turned to him, my face features in shade.

We left the bedroom and walked to the main room. We said goodbye and Aoshi closed the door.

He walked to the kitchen, cleaned the bowls and washed the dishes. I insisted once more in helping him but he wouldn't accept at all. I spent my time just watching him there while he was washing and cleaning everything. It took more than one hour.

"You're still weak. You'd better rest now." his voice was as deep as usual.

"I'd like to check your hand."

He passed by me, he'd probably go to the hallway.

"It's not necessary."

"No, it is! I am the physician here and I am taking a look at your hand. Come."

I went to the clinic room. Aoshi followed me.

I asked him to sit near me and reach out his hand.

He did.

I touched his hand. The bandage was soaked even though he was avoiding letting it get wet while washing things.

I unwrapped it and I saw the cut. Fortunately, it was not bleeding.

"See? I told there'd be no problem."

"Don't be so stubborn! I am going to clean it up, put more medicine and change the bandage."

I did everything as described. He didn't say anything else. He only kept his eyes down during the whole process. His lips looked a bit crisper than usual. But maybe I was seeing things.

"It's done." I released his hand.

"Thanks."

He stood up and I did the same. We walked to the hallway. I entered the bedroom. He entered the bathroom. Tension.

I changed my clothes for a sleeping one. Aoshi left the bathroom and I saw he had washed himself and changed clothes as well.

I entered the bedroom and sat on the futon, he came and stopped by the door. He was very serious.

I looked at him, trying to decipher what was going on. That whole tension atmosphere always around us seemed to be at its top.

Suddenly, he finally spoke.

"Whose baby is safe?"

My heart almost stopped that time.

I frowned and looked at him.

"What?"

"I am sorry but I couldn't help hearing the final sentence you spoke while inside this very bedroom with Kaoru-san. You said a baby was safe."

Zillion things were coming to my head. I was in despair. He had heard what he wasn't supposed to hear, not that way. What would I do? My hands were getting cold and sweat. I hid them on the blanket.

"There was no baby... I can't recall it..."

I felt his eyes on me. It was a heavy look. His arms were crossed.

I smiled trying to dismiss my tension.

"I am sorry to disappoint you, Okashira Shinomori Aoshi, but your ears failed you this time."

He didn't move a muscle at all.

I lied down on the futon and pulled the blanket to cover myself. He was looking down. This time it was me who was staring.

"You must be tired too. Come inside and lay down to sleep, Aoshi-sama ."

I moved aside to make room for him on the futon.

Aoshi finally moved. He unfolded his arms and walked outside, placed himself behind the shouji door and pushed it a little bit.

"I am at the meditation room. If you need something at night, just call my name. Good night."

He walked on the hallway. I could hear the other shoji door being pushed.

XxXxXxX

Oh, it was soooooo fcking strange when she woke up, uh? The tension between them will never dismiss!

IMO, I thought Aoshi-sama was very cold in what he last did, closing the door and going to the other room when he realized Megumi had made room for him... but it's sooooo attractive too. I love his coldness. But I also feel a lot for dear Megumi...

If it were with me, I think I'd be on his feet asking for him to beat me, use me and freeze me more... :P masochist? For Aoshi only!!!!


	24. Second Interlude

Chapter XXIV – Second Interlude.

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi...) I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan who is going crazy because of this fan fiction... suffering of a mental block.

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

XxXxXxXx

I tried hard to hear him from my room but I heard nothing anymore. My eyes were opened but I could see nothing more than the shadows dancing on the wall due the pale yellow light from that lantern right beside me.

I tossed and turned on the futon. The fabrics were rustling violently. He had heard that and now I was supposed to face his accusing eyes on me. All sleeping will I could have ever gotten was gone for good.

I felt a great will of screaming and crying. But I couldn't scream. It was night and it'd surely wake neighbors up. I could just cry silently.

XxXxXx

Aoshi walked to the meditation room. He opened the door and got in. He roamed some minutes around, into those walls. His bare feel touching the tatami, making no sound. He could not have lied down there with her, that was the best choice for sure.

"She's hiding something."

He sat and thought what that could be.

It was only dark, he didn't light anything. He closed his eyes and started thinking of many things that could lead her to that. Many thoughts were coming in a messy way. He had to organize them.

The last sentence she had told Kaoru in private was echoing into his mind. She had said it with joy on her voice. And when he opened the door, he sensed she was scared. Her dark eyes couldn't deny that to him. Her open mouth breathing the dry air. Her hands against the wall...

"Could she be pregnant?"

That thought made him open his blue eyes and run them on the dark room.

"Could she?"

He bit his lower lip. That thought froze him for a second. He closed his fists and, for a moment, they seemed extremely heavy. He would have a child. A child with her. His mind seemed to go blank.

"But, if it was true, why would she hide it from me? Considering her personality, she'd think it'd be too wonderful and she'd tell me right away."

He stopped thinking. He thought he had heard her sobbing. He waited and tried to listen to something again. No, it didn't happen again. The night was pretty silent. The crickets and all the night insects were hushed. The wind had also stopped.

But she had also been strange. He remembered she used to say she loved him many times a day when they were together. And now? Since he had returned she hadn't said anything. She was tense, her sweetness and loving acts had almost disappeared. There was only shame. She was blushing for anything as though they had just met for the first time. And those times he thought and maybe even realized she was really avoiding him. The reason? It was still unknown.

"Could she be in love with someone else?"

But who? There were male faces passing right before Aoshi's closed eyes.

"Sagara!" Aoshi opened his eyes once more. The spike-haired figure showed up before his eyes with a smirk on his face. "Well, at least Sagara seems to be in love with her. But... wait!!! Maybe she is hiding because it's Sagara's child."

Sagara's child... no... it couldn't be. If he were given to sarcasm and Saitou-ish behavior, he'd have laughed a sharp, crazy and loud laugh. Megumi would not give Sagara a chance and he'd not take any advantage of her... yes, he liked her enough not to do such. And it was clear Megumi wanted Sagara just as a friend. Maybe once that love was reciprocal, but not anymore.

But... she could not be pregnant. He had asked about the blood and the doctor told him not to worry, it was normal. He had got that from that extremely embarrassing situation at Genzai-sensei's house when he asked about the blood on her clothes and sheets. So, she was not pregnant...but whose baby would that be? He surely heard that, he knew his senses didn't fail. Maybe Kaoru-san... well, it was a possibility. It would definitely sound better.

Yes, Megumi could not be pregnant at all.

Another sob. Yes, she was crying. Maybe she was feeling pain. He decided to go there and check. He opened the shouji door and walked silently to her room. He had left the door of her bedroom semi opened. He peered inside.

She had her back turned to door. Because of the position of her elbows, he guessed she had her face into her hands. The pale yellow light coming from the lantern was drawing shadows everywhere.

He stood by the door.

"Megumi?"

She didn't turn or answer. He realized she raised her elbows, she was drying her tears, he guessed so.

"Hi" she answered weakly some seconds later

Aoshi also spoke very low.

"I wondered if you're feeling any pain."

"No, I am not."

"Do you need something?"

She didn't turn to him again. She took a deeper breath.

"You... No... thanks..."

"Uhum..."

Aoshi thought everything was very strange. He walked silently to her. She didn't move. He bent, his right hand stretched, about to touch her. She was half covered by a crimson blanket, dressing a light green sleeping yukata. He moved his hand slowly, he'd touch her blazing black hair and her white face. He wanted to touch her.

Suddenly, she turned to him.

He saw her teary eyes and immediately pulled his hand back. She looked at his move, frowning.

"I... I'd check your temperature..." he said.

She blinked. One tear ran on her cheek. She lifted her hand and dried it when it got closer to the pale soft skin of her neck.

"Don't worry, I have no fever."

Timidly, he touched her forehead and realized she really had no fever at all. He pulled his hand back although he wished he had lingered there for one more second.

"Good. I just wanted to check on you because I heard you crying. And I am in charge of taking care of you for now." He replied.

She noticed his fingers were moving. Weird. He turned around and walked silently to the door.

Aoshi heard the blanket rustling. She had probably sat down on the futon.

He hesitated in crossing the doorway for a moment.

"Aoshi-sama..."

He turned his head to her and glanced her with the corner of his eyes.

"Why do you change this fast? It's not fair!" she said in a low crying voice.

She was sat on the futon, holding her crimson blanket. It looked like a childish scene.

"Fair?" he replied.

"Yes... sometimes you're so sweet, then you suddenly turn to ice. You were sweet to me today, brushing my hair, taking care of me. But then you just go out when I make room for you to sleep here with me."

"It's not only me who changes fast." He said in his usual cold-pitched voice.

She sighed. Aoshi looked forward again. His hand touched the door.

Once again, he heard a fabric rustling.

Megumi was now standing on the futon.

"What do you mean with this?" the tone of her voice had gotten different.

"It's not time to talk of this now." he almost whispered. "You are tired and need to sleep."- authority was present in his voice now.

She looked down, more tears seemed to come to her eyes, but she was able to fight them. Soon, they had disappeared. She could not see his eyes. But they were narrow and cold.

"Yes, I think we should end this torture now! " she said with all the power she had.

She had to stop and breath a bit. She took a long deep breath and her lungs were filled with night fresh air.

"You used to be..." he said calmly and coldly but he interrupted his speech for an unknown reason.

She waited for him to complete his sentence but he didn't. She didn't know why but she felt her cheeks getting hot, she was so nervous!

"But the truth it that you're slipping away from me, I feel it." she almost screamed.

It was not a proper scream, but everything was so silent that her words echoed and fulfilled loudly every spot in the house.

He didn't say anything in response for a moment. She was expecting an answer. He'd have to answer her. Aoshi was still standing. She could not see his face, she was looking at his back. His hand was on the door.

He gave one step forward and his hand slipped form the door. He turned his head and glanced her from above his shoulder. Cold piercing blue eyes.

"So are you."

XxXxXxXxXx

Hum... I decided to go through some changes here in this fic. I got MANY ideas and I hope this will get ok. But I decided to go for a change on this story. Since the beginning, the fic is based on Megumi's point of view because it really started as a songfic. But to make things more dynamic, I decided to change this a bit and since chapter 9, I tried to mix Megumi's point of view (1st person) and an overall view (3rd person). From now on, I decided to continue the story away from Megumi's point of view. I hope you understand that, and that you also appreciate.

Leila! I missed you so much! I am writing chapter 29 already!

I love Aoshi being cold even with the ones he loves...

About the masochism, I'm masochist for Aoshi ONLY... in fact, I am sadist... whips and handcuffs rule! If I could get them on Aoshi.... /drools... ehrm... recomposing myself now...: P


	25. The Turning Point

Chapter XXV – The Turning Point.

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi...) I am not making money with them; I am only a poor little fan who is going crazy because of this fan fiction... and suffering from many crazy ideas roaming into my mind!

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech.

XxXxXxXx

Aoshi left the room and walked silently, as always. His steps could not be heard at all on the hallway. Megumi was sure he had entered the other room cause the shouji door slid shut, violating the silence that was present into the house.

He had left her standing on the futon, fists closed, head slightly bowed and a great shadow on her eyes. Silently after his cold answer and leaving, she went down slowly on her knees, her hands on her lap. She was not able to raise her head or to look up. She felt so tired, beaten.

Everything was so silent. The house was just like a ghostly one, they both were silent, and her self was silent. An enormous difference from what she used to be.

Finally, she had courage to look around and she saw the lantern was still lit and warm. Idly, she crawled and reached it to put it out. Now, it was the perfect gloomy scene: coldness, darkness and cutting silence. And his last look to her, his last words: "_So do you."_

How could she point out future in such a lame, loose and weird one-loving relationship? She knew she had promised it but her fire was not enough for both of them anymore. Yes... she was indeed slipping away in defense. She'd not let him hurt her anymore. She'd be the good and old foxy Megumi again.

_xxxToo long sacrificed my feelings to the ones_

_Who take all 'till there's nothing in the end._

...

_Till I found out that I only loved your half in me_

_So much time I spent - not knowing myself_

_Too much love I'd given for everyone but nothing for me _xxx

He entered the meditation room and stretched his body on the tatami. His feathery bangs fell aside when he passed his hand over them. His blue eyes focused on a distant and unclear spot on the ceiling. The darkness involved and cradled his dim thoughts on her.

_You are slipping away from me._

XxX

Morning rose beautifully in its magnificent shades of yellow, blue and pink. Nature seemed to party and amuse everybody with its beautiful colors and pleasant smell. Spring had always been a particular wonderful sight for the eyes, but this year everything seemed warmer, more human, happier, colorful and full of the most enchanting sounds.

Yet, inside that very house the long winter had never gave up on the wonderful sun and happiness of spring.

She cracked opened her eyes. They were sore and hurt. She was totally folded on the crimson blanket. The sunbeams were gently caressing the pale skin of her cheeks. Her ears could hear the birds chirping and some happy voices and steps outside. Lazily, she turned her body to the other side and looked at the door. It was not totally closed, she could see a small part of the hallway through the narrow opening.

She left from underneath the blanket, stirred and stretched her body. She had taken long to sleep last night. But she was feeling herself pretty nice, even strong. And she would surely be back to work today. It was nice she was still healthy after all.

The house was absolutely silent, as usual. No signs of Aoshi around, but he was surely somewhere inside. She stood up and went to her desk. She got the hairbrush and started caressing the long black strands of her fine silky hair. She was reflected on the mirror but her look was distant. Her dark eyes had only a pale light on them.

She rose on her feet and untied her sleeping yukata. The thin fabric slid on her body and fell on the wood floor. She was not standing right before the large mirror but her body was partially reflected on it. Pale soft skin. Instinctively, her hands came up and slid on her belly. Carefully and playfully, her fingers caressed the skin around her navel and went down a bit. There, she lingered her hand and encircled it trying to figure out any difference in shape. There was nothing prominent yet, but she was pretty sure it was there and it would develop quiet and safe. A pure and sincere smile curled on her lips. She sighed happily and tried to imagine the frail beatings of that minuscule heart right inside her womb.

A pleasant tea smell reached her nose. Aoshi was probably preparing it. Rapidly, she took the cloth from the floor and proceeded in changing her sleeping yukata for a dark blue kimono. Its sleeves were embroidered with a white thread, drawing small leaves. She got a silver hairpin and bound her raven dark hair into a knot with it. Then, she took the red lipstick long forgotten and pressed and slid it over her beautiful rosy lips. She glanced the small delicate transparent bottle of perfume right on the desk and took it in her hands. She opened it and moistened her fingers with the clear liquid that emanated a pleasant jasmine fragrance and passed them on her neck and chest.

Silently, she opened the shouji door enough for her tiny body to pass and walked to the clinic room. While passing near the kitchen, she heard a cool familiar voice calling in its usual uninterested tone:

"Won't you have breakfast?"

She stopped, her left hand laid over her chest. She didn't know why but she blushed with that. Her head went instinctively down and she parted her lips to mumble an answer.

"I am not hungry..."

He was sat into the kitchen with a cup of tea in his hand. But he stood up and came walking peacefully to the hallway. Megumi felt she couldn't move. His presence and the nice smell emanating from his body bewildered her senses completely.

He placed himself right before her. Only then she fought shame and looked at him. Immediately, she found herself lost into the blue vastness of his eyes. His hair was damp and the smell of his body was inebriating, mild wood, rather citric scent.

He was dressing a dark blue suit, the same dark blue of her kimono. Strangely enough, his face had no trace of last night frustrated overture. It was right the opposite. His face was clear, his eyes were pretty normal and with an astonishing calm shade of blue. His cool features were icy for sure, but they were not piercing, freezing or accusing.

He raised his hand and in a glance, his fingers were around her wrist. She widened her eyes.

"You need to feed properly. I prepared a better breakfast for you this morning."

She looked down in a very big shame.

"Thank you. It was not necessary though. I have much work to do."

"You can work as much as you want after you have your breakfast." Once again his tone bore authority.

Megumi imagined he was having a glimpse of his Okashira times.

Realizing it would be worse to disobey, she let herself be led to the kitchen. She glanced the table and saw many kinds of food, he should have woken up very early to prepare all of that.

She sat and he served her a cup of tea. After that, he sat right in front of her, straightened his body and grabbed the chopsticks. She had her hands on her lap. She was so ashamed and he looked so self-centered as never.

Timidly, she got her chopsticks and placed a morsel of tofu into her mouth.

They spent the mealtime completely silent. After that, she rose to her feet, bowed in thanks and started putting things away for he had stopped eating before her. Aoshi came and started doing the same.

"You have much work to do, don't bother with this, let it with me."

She nodded and left him in the kitchen, slowly walking to the clinic room.

The clinic was immaculate. Perfectly clean and everything was in place. She closed the door that led to the inner part of her house and opened the one to the anteroom. The anteroom was also very clean and the cushioned benches were also very clean and arranged together.

She looked around and felt happy for returning to her work. She opened the door that led to the street.

In no time, patients were coming and going. People were also coming to visit her and check if she was feeling well for she had been absent these last days. She had almost forgotten the nice feeling of being admired and requested amongst all that sorrow she held inside. She was smiling after a long time. The clinic was full and she remembered it was pretty difficult to work there all alone. Megumi used to have an assistant but the girl had moved to Yokohama and she had had so many problems meanwhile she just forgot hiring a new one. For one moment, she felt sad. She remembered of Yusuke in Aizu. He was the perfect assistant. While dealing with papers, she felt her heart tired as those dear thoughts reached her mind.

When the last patient of that morning went away, she finally returned to the anteroom. There were papers to be organized. It was past midday and she was hungry but she had much work left. Anyway, she'd just see the next patient after three pm.

Suddenly, she listened to a door being opened inside the clinic room. Some seconds later, Aoshi showed up on the anteroom.

"I came to invite you to have lunch out."

Binding the papers together, she didn't dare to look at him. Megumi was trying to look strong and keep the promise she had made herself last night. One look at those blue eyes and everything could be screwed up.

"Oh, thanks."

He approached and handed her a folder she was just going to pick. Their fingers gently brushed and she pulled her hand right away from that touch. Her cheeks were blushing hard.

"Will you have much time left until the next patient comes?"

"Not much... up to three pm... but we never know, maybe there's an emergency..."

He looked away.

"Aa."

Megumi made sure everything was in place and they both walked outside the clinic. She hadn't looked outside yet. The day was very beautiful and rather hot. Aoshi was walking right beside her with his forward distant look and hands into the pockets of his pants.

Noticing her dark eyes on him, he eyed her with the corner of his eyes. For his amusement, she turned the face rapidly and started fanning herself with her left hand. Her face had a pink shade. Realizing that, she spoke without looking at him again:

"It's really hot today, uh? I should have worn something fresher than this kimono."

Aoshi found that scene even a bit funny.

"Don't worry, we'll be arriving at the restaurant soon."

Megumi and Aoshi were walking across different streets. She imagined he'd take her to Akabeko as usual. But they were not going that direction. Aoshi was leading the way, she just followed.

"By the way, where are we going?" she fought to keep her eyes far from him.

But he looked at her while answering.

"Are you willing to try something different?"

"How different?"

Now they entered an alley. The buildings had western architecture and big placards in Japanese and another language Megumi thought was English or German. It looked like an alley with western stores and restaurants.

"This different."

Aoshi stood on the outside of a white building. Its doors were red and there was a big placard written in white. Italian food. She widened her eyes in amusement.

"Shall we enter?"

It was impossible to avoid his look now.

"Yes..."

The door was large enough to allow them both to pass at the same time, but Megumi restrained herself and came right behind him. The restaurant had a happy atmosphere. The tables were high and with chairs. The tablecloth was white and green. A happy western song was playing on the background. Megumi imagined it could only be traditional songs from Italy. One happy-looking young woman came from behind a counter, a large smile on her face.

"Good afternoon!" she bowed in an exaggerated way and spoke with a strong accent.

They both bowed in response.

She would lead them to a table. The young woman was tall and had fair skin. Her hair was light brown, she had beautiful greenish eyes and some freckles on her face. Her western dress was a rather plain red one and she wore a white apron over it.

They sat on the table and she handed them the menu. Their eyes browsed over it carefully. Many different names with the Japanese writing right beside. There were the ingredients too. Aoshi looked at Megumi's face over the menu.

"Have you decided yours?"

She hid her face from his look.

"Yes... I'd like this spaghetti with tomato sauce and Parmesan cheese."

It was pretty weird saying that. She had never eaten spaghetti or Parmesan cheese. But there's always the first time for things in life, ne?

"The same for me, then." Aoshi spoke to the waitress.

Smiling, the young woman took note of everything and asked if they'd like anything to drink.

They looked at the menu once more. There was no tea. A certain drink caught Megumi's attention.

"Oh, I'd like to try some red wine."

Immediately, Aoshi ran his eyes on the menu.

"I'll pass, thank you."

Still smiley, the waitress bowed again and left them.

Aoshi looked at Megumi. She was looking rather out of place since she woke up. He was sure she was avoiding his look and she was not speaking to him unless he'd start a conversation. Around them, there were other customers having lunch, drinking red wine, gesticulating, laughing louder and louder. Western people for sure. They had fair skin, some had a tanned one. But their hairs were not straight and all of them looked pretty blushed to Aoshi's eyes. Alcohol, for sure. Western people drink as much as Japanese. Megumi and he were the few Japanese people there that time.

Megumi was looking down as though something very interesting was taking place on her lap. Her raven hair was not tied as it had been all morning long. But she kept the beautiful dark blue kimono. That one made a very nice contrast with her pale skin and with her red lips. His blue eyes narrowed and examined her face well. Beautiful. She was apparently unaware of his look, she'd not look at him, he knew it.

The waitress returned with a large silver tray on her hands. From there, she took two white porcelain plates filled with very yellow macaroni, tomato sauce and basil on the top. It smelled very good. The waitress put the food right in front of them; then, she took a bowl containing Parmesan cheese. Bowing, she left again and brought forks, knives and spoons. At last, she brought a green bottle and one goblet filled with red wine.

Megumi first sipped the wine and the taste of it was very good. Then, she went for the macaroni and she really liked it. Aoshi was eating patiently in very small morsels. Some sips later and Megumi started feeling herself hot, her cheeks should really be blushing like hell. She was sure of that, Aoshi had his eyes on her face and she felt like smiling to him. People around were laughing and the happy song on the background in addition to the red wine made the small smile she was supposed to give him turn into her kitsune's laugh.

Aoshi seemed to feel uncomfortable. He looked around but people thought that laugh was normal and there was nobody glancing them. Megumi's face was very pink and her eyes were closed (). A grin beamed on her reddish face. He was really amused of the much and how she could drink.

Realizing Aoshi had his deep blue eyes on her, Megumi immediately pulled a lock of hair to her face and looked down. She decided not to drink anymore, it was making her happier than she should feel.

They were done with the meal and Megumi was done with the wine too. The waitress approached once more asking if they'd like any desert. Aoshi was not that fond of sweets and Megumi decided to pass that for she was really full and beginning to feel dizzy. So, Aoshi paid the bill and they left the restaurant.

Once again, walking side by side, Megumi was smiling. Aoshi turned to her and asked:

"Are you feeling well?"

Megumi gave a rather suspicious look at him, fox ears emerging. When she heard that, the smiled that curved her lips vanished.

"Sure!"

Aoshi got amused and surprised with her reaction. Her look was even aggressive that time.

"Aa..."

"..."

They walked a bit more in the streets. Some of them, Megumi had never seen, it was a mix of Japanese and Western civilization.

Aoshi took his western watch out of his pocket and saw it was almost two and twenty.

"Megumi, it's almost two and twenty. Do you still have some time left before going to work?"

She was looking childish.

"Uh... two and twenty... sure... why?"

Aoshi turned around and told her:

"So, come with me."

She decided to follow his steps. The dizziness had gotten better and her face seemed to be cooling down. But she was feeling so hot, scorching inside that damned kimono.

"Why did I have to come with this???" she was mumbling to herself.

"Excuse me?"

"Oh! Nothing, Aoshi-san."

That time he raised his eyebrows... Aoshi-san... Aoshi-san... since when did she call him that way? Aoshi-san... once she called him Aoshi, previously, she used to call him Shinomori-san, Okashira, Shinomori-sama, more recently, Aoshi-sama... but Aoshi-san? He looked at her face. A hint of a smile was still printed on her lips. Her eyes were opened and glancing the buildings on the streets. He thought she had never gone to that part of the city. He pointed a yellowish building at a corner and made his way there. Megumi followed him near.

They entered a very light store. The smell of wood was intense there. An old woman came their way. Megumi and Aoshi were having their Western day. She glanced all around while Aoshi was talking to the old woman. When the old woman went a bit far, Megumi held Aoshi's arm. He turned his head to her.

"What's this, Aoshi-san?"

Again she spoke Aoshi-san.

"The thing I told you yesterday, Megumi-san."

She realized he was probably teasing because she had called him Aoshi-san. So it bothered him... she supposed so. But there was no noticeable teasing in his voice.

The old woman returned.

"Please, gentleman and lady, come this way."

Both of them followed the older woman to a place in the store reserved for beds. There were many and in several colors, sizes and materials. Some were made of wood, others of iron. The wooden ones had different colors: light brown, medium brown, dark brown, almost black, almost beige. The iron ones bore the metallic color of iron, some of them had a leaden shade, others had been painted in white.

Megumi looked all around with very curious eyes. Aoshi turned to her, the old woman smiling at them.

"Choose the one you like." He said.

Megumi almost gasped.

"A... Aoshi-san..."

He laid his eyes on her surprised face.

"I thought that futon was uncomfortable. You like comfort. That's why I thought of buying a cozy western bed for you."

She blushed heavily. The old woman noticed and widened her smile.

"Don't be ashamed, darling. Your husband is just caring for you!"

This time, her face almost went purple and she could feel she was choking.

"He's n..." her voice was trembling.

Aoshi blinked his eyes that were still focused on her face.

Only then, Megumi understood and smiled timidly, fists closed inside her long sleeved kimono.

Her eyes ran on several beds but one caught her attention. It was an iron one, its color was dark, leaden. She found beautiful the intricate iron weavings in its tall head. She approached it and touched the mattress. Soft, soft, soft! It was covered with a lavender cloth.

Aoshi turned to the old woman and asked:

"She went for that one."

"It's indeed very beautiful, don't you think, gentleman?" the old woman looked at him.

He nodded.

Megumi turned her head to look at Aoshi.

"Is this one you want?"

She nodded rapidly and timidly.

The old woman raised her voice.

"We have double size."

"Great." Aoshi said impassive.

Megumi knew she was blushing. She turned her back to them as quick as she could.

"Come on, your foolish fox, come on!!!!" she mentally slapped herself. "But why did he have to pull this trick on me?"

Suddenly, her eyes got filled with excitement as she gazed something some feet away. She looked to Aoshi and the old woman. They were doing business. They were talking over some cloths. She moved herself to its direction.

"Kawaii!!! So lovely, so lovely."

She was smiling. The object was a white wood cradle. She gently slid her fingers on it. The mattress was also very soft and the bedclothes had small colored horse figures. Her smile got wider and wider, her eyes were really shinning. She could almost see her baby there while she was cradling and mumbling a tune during its sleep.

Aoshi turned his head and saw she was near the white cradle. Her delicate fingers touching the white wood and then sliding to touch the mattress. The old woman had a fair smile on her face.

"Your young wife is dreaming of a baby!"

Aoshi narrowed his eyes and the sentence he had heard last night came back to his head.

_The baby is safe then._

Aoshi took the watch out of his pocket. There were only fifteen minutes left to three pm. He walked to Megumi. It was impossible not to see the big smile she had on her face and the brilliant shine on her eyes. He came as silent as always and placed his hand on her shoulder.

She jumped and let go a thin and low scream. Her hands went up to her heart.

"A... Aoshi-san."

"We just have fifteen minutes before three."

His eyes were narrow, probably looking and examining her

"Oh! We must hurry!"

"Yes."

He walked away, she followed glancing the cradle with the corner of the eyes. The old woman smiled at them and said:

"It'll be there by the sunset, Shinomori-san."

Aoshi nodded and they left.

The path to home was silent. Aoshi was still eying her discretely and she was pretending she hadn't seen that.

Megumi started feeling sick during the way, world seemed to be going around and around. The heat was suffocating her.

It was seven past three when they arrived home. A teenager was already waiting for her. He'd surely have his broken arm checked. Megumi smiled sadly at him and opened the clinic door.

Noticing she was not ok, Aoshi decided to stay at the anteroom and be a receptionist and assistant for a day.

Megumi's reply was a tiny smile.

"I need to hire someone, I know!"

Fifteen minutes later, the boy was gone. Aoshi was still at the anteroom. Megumi slid her head out of the clinic door and told him she'd enter home.

"Please, close it for me and tell the patients I am not doing well."

Aoshi did as she ordered. He cleaned the place and went home later on.

He looked for Megumi everywhere. She was into the bathroom.

"Are you better, Megumi?"

She didn't answer. Shortly after that, she opened the door and came outside. Her face was very pale and her hands were shaking.

Aoshi came closer to help her and noticed her hands were also very cold.

"You drank too much."

A fainting smile came to her lips.

"Maybe."

He helped her on her way to the bedroom.

"I can prepare you some tea."

She didn't look at him. She was hot and still feeling a bit happy because of the alcohol.

"I'd surely appreciate although I am feeling much better already. Thank you."

Aoshi left the room and walked to the kitchen. On his way, he sensed someone on the door. Finally, the person knocked. Aoshi decided not to answer the door before people knock anymore. He opened it and he glanced a man that would be probably about thirty-five years old, dressed in a western suit and carrying a black briefcase.

"Good afternoon. Is Takani-sensei home?" he bowed slightly.

Aoshi also bowed in response.

"Yes."

Hearing her name, Megumi left the bedroom and came walking slowly to the front door. Noticing her presence, Aoshi turned to her and the stranger smiled.

"Takani-sensei." he bowed. "I am Matsuyama Nobori from Miksi Hospital."

Megumi approached the two men. Aoshi was still standing by the door.

"Could I talk to you, Takani-sensei?" the man said eyeing Aoshi.

"Sure!" she answered and led him into the main room. She pointed some cushions were he could sit.

Aoshi closed the door and went to the kitchen prepare the tea he had mentioned before.

Megumi looked at the man who had just entered her house. He was wearing a gray western suit and a black tie. Under his arm, along with the black briefcase, she saw a white doctor jacket. He had a tanned skin, narrow eyes and very black hair carefully bound.

"I am Matsuyama Noburi, as I had previously said. I am here because we, at Miksi Hospital, have heard good things about you and they were surely accurate and precise. Your knowledge both in Japanese and Western Medicine impressed us. That's why I was sent here. We decided to offer you a job there at our hospital. We are also going through some seminars with very important Western doctors in less than a month and we also would like to invite you to take part in them."

Megumi was surprised. Her eyes were almost widened by those words. Miksi Hospital was the most modern hospital in Tokyo and they surely had the best Japanese and Western physician in Japan working there.

"I am amused!" she said.

"No, Takani-sensei. We are surely going to be amused by your work there. So is this a positive reply to our request?"

Megumi smiled. Her cheeks were still hot due to wine effects.

"Sure!"

Aoshi entered the room with the tea and some loafs. Megumi got the tray and served Matsyuama-sensei.

"Thank you."

The man took a sip of his tea. Aoshi vanished from the room and nobody could tell where he had gone that time.

"Takani-sensei, you can continue running your clinic here. The job there at the hospital is a part-time one to everybody except the managers, of course. I think it's a good thing so the physicians can still have their lives out of the hospital, ne? Besides, the pay is very good"

Megumi smiled once again.

"Yes."

She drank the tea but ate nothing. The smell of the loafs was making her sick.

Matsuyama-sensei ended his tea and loafs, gathered his belongings and stood up. Megumi did the same.

"May we wait for you tomorrow or you'd rather start in one week?"

"I'll be there tomorrow."

"It's going to be a pleasure for us, Takani-sensei." He bowed.

Megumi opened the door and Matsuyama-sensei left.

She closed the door. She could almost jump. An extremely big grin showed up on her face. She leaned her body against the door.

From nowhere, Aoshi suddenly materialized in front of her eyes.

"Oh, you scared me!" the grin disappeared for one second and reappeared again.

"Sorry." he said passionless.

She looked at him. He was so handsome, so handsome. And she was so happy, so happy. Two motives for all that happiness: the new acquired job and the wine. His black bangs were partially veiling the amazing vastness of his blue eyes. And he was just like that, motionless, in front of her. Her dark eyes made a great effort to look away from his lips and they fell on a slight piece of his chest skin showing through the first-button-opened shirt.

She knew she blushed hard.

"Guess what." She said analyzing that tempting skin.

He had surely heard all the chat.

"I see you are very happy."

She walked closer. He didn't move.

"Yes... I am... I got a job at Miksi Hospital. It surely means a lot to me." she said while thinking to herself "Get your eyes out of that skin RIGHT AWAY!!!"

"Congratulations. I feel glad for you."

He moved his arms in a way that made more skin get unveiled. Megumi was almost peering inside. A warm sensation.

"Stop this, Megumi no baka!!!" she was fighting herself.

Struggling, she managed to take her eyes out of that piece of skin. But she didn't realize she had been walking closer to him, she was only three feet away now. She raised her face and his moist lips were right before her eyes. And that smell. Kami-sama... the smell of his body was filling her mind, bewildering all her senses.

Unconsciously, she stepped on and stretched her hand. It nestled right in his bare chest skin. He looked down at her. Her fingers went up to his jaw line, grabbing his neck. He was motionless except for his parted lips and heavy breath. His bangs were also going downer, he was slowly bowing his head. The heat emanating from him was making her warm and cozy.

Her hands coming up an invisible path to his neck sent chills down his spine. He knew he was breathing heavily. The wonderful smell of her hair was right there on his nostrils. Her lips were just tempting him, inviting him. Yield to temptation.

The atmosphere was hot. Megumi was blushing and there was a suggestive smirk on her lips. Her eyes were even looking wild. Aoshi parted his lips more as if he'd say something. But no sound came out of his body. His arms were suspended on the air, about to encircle her body, coming slowly to embrace her. He knew it. He wanted it. He wanted _her._

She was falling into a bewitchment. She closed her dark eyes and felt the soft brush of his chin on her left cheek. Hunter and prey. Who was the hunter now? And who'd fit the prey? Who'd give in first?

"No!" she thought.

Megumi opened her eyes quickly and let go of his neck. She felt like a cold rain was falling on her. Her promise. Se wouldn't let him hurt her again.

"NEVERMORE!!!!!" her scream echoed the house.

He furrowed one eyebrow and let his suspended arms fall to his side. What was that his eyes and ears had just witnessed?

She bowed her head almost into her chest.

"I... I've got work to do..."

He curled his fingers. His eyes were closed. His parted lips finally spoke.

"Aa."

She rushed into the clinic room and locked herself into it.

Aoshi saw the yellow light of the sun was fading slowly.

Someone else was on the door. He opened and two men entered the house. She was locked inside and making noises. Much work to be done.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

The sentences into xxx refers to a song I put inside this fic as tough Megumi's thoughts. It's a Lacrimosa song from their Elodia CD (1999). Its name is right the same of this chapter: The turning Point.

I had fun writing this one. I guess I never took so long writing a single chapter. But I changed a bit, described more and it's very nice not to write only in Megumi's point of view. I guess the story gets richer. : P and I also think this was the longest chapter till now. Sorry if it's too long, but the Second Prelude was not that long... if you add and divide per two, we'll have two regular chapters! hehe

Things got a bit hot in here... /runs for cover.

For sure I miss my only reader. Wait, there's Eviladdict too! I miss you two, ok?

Did you see things changed a bit around there, uh? Wait and see! Things are going sooo nice. They'll surely stop fighting, but as you could see, it's because they don't feel like.... Uh... hope you get it.


	26. Runaway

Chapter XXVI – Runaway.

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi...) I am not making money with them. And you already know all the craziness and the works...

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech. (You also know this, right???? Larissa no baka!)

XxXxXxXx

Megumi was panting heavily into the clinic room. To be far from him, she decided to go to the anteroom and let the clinic room locked.

"You stupid woman!!!"

She was really angry with herself. Her promise was almost gone. Almost.

"Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!!!"

She heard the absolute silence. Trying to avoid that piercing silence, she started pulling and pushing furniture, throwing things on the floor, dealing with paper. Only to make a very big noise and be far away from his silence. When there was nothing left to be thrown and she was in the middle of a big mess, she sat on a corner of the anteroom and pulled her knees very close to her body. She put both hands on her ears. She didn't want to hear him. She didn't want to hear his silence. She didn't want to hear her own voice telling she loved him; telling she wanted him so much. Telling it was very easy for him to hurt her again and again as much as it pleased him. Telling she was afraid and weak against those blue eyes.

Megumi shut her eyes and narrowed them to the most. She had a painful and anguished semblance.

"Oh, Kami-sama... it's so hard. It's going to be so hard if he remains here!"

When she managed to open her eyes, she saw she was in complete darkness. For a moment, she panicked.

"Where would the lantern be?"

She searched for it in the dark, her hands touching everything around. She was crawling in the dark, hitting her body on the messed things on the floor. Finally, she found it and lit it.

Megumi's dark eyes gazed the messy anteroom. As messed up as her own thoughts, her own feelings. The silence was filled with the chirping of insects and the steps on the streets.

She had a whole room to fix again. It would surely take long. She smiled when she thought of that. It'd surely keep her much time away from him.

XxX

It was already dark. Aoshi's eyes roamed on the room. There were hours she was locked there and he didn't dare to call her or enter the clinic room. First, she was making much noise. Now, everything was calm. He wondered if she had fallen asleep inside. Or maybe she could have fainted.

"Should I break in?"

"Should I break in?"

He was sat on the bed, torso bowed, his elbows on his knees, his hands pending. There was a lantern lit. The smell of new clean bedclothes was in the air. He felt he was waiting for something. Something. What? Someone. Who? A reason. Why? Here. Now.

He pulled his watch. 8:40. She was taking long. His eyes looked all around again. He threw his body against the soft mattress. It seemed to enfold his body carefully. He stretched his hand and touched a clean yukata he had taken for her. The bath he had prepared was just cold in the bathtub now.

The tea should have already turned to ice. So should have the food. His fingers closed when he touched the thin fabric. It had now many wrinkles around his fingers. He gently pulled it near. It smelled good. Just like her. His eyes were once again focused on an imaginary spot on the ceiling. Everything around bore nighttime darkness.

Aoshi tried to understand what took place that afternoon. The way they were both pushed to each other. Instinctively. The way they were playing that game. The way he felt. The way she smirked and the hot light into her eyes. They way she ran from him when he touched her.

And he remembered more. Her words to Kaoru-san would not leave his mind. The happy look and smile he saw on her face when she got near that cradle. And the way she drank wine, for sure. Takani Megumi.

He had been lost into his thoughts. He pulled his watch again and got pretty amused to see it was already almost 10 pm. Her yukata still lingered under his fingers. He stood up and stretched the bedclothes. Then, he walked silently to the clinic room.

XxX

After organizing the mess, Megumi felt very tired. The lantern was fading to an orange light. She was not hungry but she knew she needed a bath. But she'd have to see him and she didn't want that. She was truly running away from him.

"What if I spend the night here in the clinic?"

That was a serious possibility. She went to the same corner she had been before. She sat there once again but this time her legs were stretched for she let the tie of her kimono looser. Her fingers brushed her black hair carefully.

It was so silent. So silent. And her eyes were getting heavy. She tried to fight sleep but everything was getting heavier very quickly. In no time, her eyes were downcast and she was breathing slowly. The light of the lantern extinguished.

XxX

Aoshi knocked on the clinic room and waited. No answer from inside.

"Megumi."

There was only silence.

"Megumi. Just tell me if you're ok."

"..."

He tried to open the door. It was locked. He knocked with more strength and called her louder.

"Megumi. Are you ok?"

No reply.

He looked around.

Finally, he turned to the door and said:

"You give me no choice but to break in there."

Still, she didn't answer.

He took some distance and threw his shoulder against the door. It opened.

Aoshi found himself in the middle of complete darkness. With a lantern on his hands, he saw Megumi was not in t he clinic room.

"I can't believe she left." he shook his head.

But the anteroom door was also closed, not locked though. He opened it and it was also dark. But he saw a figure sat by the corner of the room. It was Megumi. He walked slowly to her, the lantern on his hands. He bent and saw her eyes were closed.

"What if she fainted again?" his heart started beating faster.

He stretched his hand under her chin and lifted it. Normal breath, normal body temperature.

"Maybe she just fell asleep. I'm going to take her to bed."

Before taking her in his arms, Aoshi lit the lanterns around. Only then, he returned to her and got her in his arms.

Her face was livid and beautiful although a brow was furrowed. Her kimono tie was loose and he was careful not to let it get looser and open.

He walked with her in his arms and placed her on the bed. That kimono would be too uncomfortable for her to sleep and he decided to wake her up at least to change her clothes. He wouldn't do that. He was ashamed.

"Megumi." He called and shook her slightly.

"Megumi, wake up." he continued shaking her.

After repeating the process three times, he saw her dark eyes opening little by little right before his own eyes.

Getting conscious, Megumi saw she was with him. She widened her eyes.

"A... Aoshi-san!" she almost jumped.

"Calm down." He said patiently. "I just woke you up for you to change your clothes."

She looked around.

"Where am I?"

"At your own room."

She looked down and saw she was not in the futon but in the bed she had seen that same afternoon.

"Oh, they already delivered it."

Aoshi nodded.

She moved her body back, going far from Aoshi's arms. She was a bit dizzy.

"I... I... need to... take a bath."

"Aren't you hungry?"

"No!" she said quickly. She couldn't even thing of food.

Megumi tried to leave the bed but her legs seemed to go weaker. Aoshi held her arm.

"Wait. I had already prepared your bath but it's very cold now. I'll heat up water again."

"Thank you."

He slid his body out of the bed and went outside the room.

"Damn." She thought. "I should have stayed at the clinic room..."

She heard him dealing with water.

"But why on Earth did he have to take me out of there?"

Megumi looked around and saw a clean sleeping yukata. He had probably taken it for her.

Her mind was blank. She was just looking at her feet, holding the white yukata. Some minutes later, Aoshi showed up by the door.

"I'm done."

She thanked him and entered the bathroom.

Megumi dove her body in the hot water.

"Hum... relaxing!" she smiled while dropping some oil essence into the water.

It should be late, but she didn't mind washing her hair. It was so good to be into the bathtub. Surely, it was one of her favorite things. She kept her body immersed into the water until it ran cold. Then, she got the clean towel and dried her body, dressed the white sleeping yukata and opened the bathroom door.

She walked slowly to the bedroom and noticed Aoshi was in the kitchen drinking tea, most probably. She brushed her hair and rubbed the towel on it, trying to make it drier.

Suddenly, a taste came to her mouth and she felt an extremely big will of having it. Idly, she let the towel alone and rushed to the kitchen. Aoshi opened his eyes because of her presence. But she didn't look at him. Her hands went to the cupboard, she seemed to be looking for something really eagerly.

"Do you want some tea?" Aoshi asked coolly.

She didn't turn his head to him.

"Tea?"she laughed her kitsune laugh and shook her head vigorously making the black strands dance. "No way!"

"Water?"

She smirked without looking at him.

Suddenly, his eyes could not believe that.

"Sake!!!" she had a big grin on her face.

Megumi came and sat near him, pouring sake into the cup.

"I won't offer you cause I know you don't drink."

She drank it at once and filled it again.

Aoshi raised his brows in amusement.

"But I see you do."

She grinned and had another cup. The taste was nice and she had craved for it.

"And it's too much."

He didn't know what was going on with her. She had given up on the cup and was chugging right out of the bottle.

That made him the most amused he could be. He never thought he'd live to see Megumi, a fine mannered woman doing that. It would perfectly fit Sagara or Hiko but not her.

In a quick move, Aoshi stood up and got the bottle out of her hands.

She blinked many times to make sure the bottle had really disappeared. Looking at her side, she saw Aoshi holding the bottle. His face bore cold hardened features.

"Hum.... Aoshi-sama... very bad boy you are..." she said in a rather childish voice.

"Enough, Megumi. You already had alcoholic beverage today."

"Hum..." she moaned and sighed.

He didn't mind her begging look at him.

"No. It's time to go to sleep or you will start looking like a hermit we all know."

She frowned.

"Are you thinking you're dealing with Misao?" she immediately raised a brow in defy.

He kept himself cool.

"I know I am not. I am dealing with a stubborn doctor. Misao knows how to take orders better that you do."

"Who's stubborn here, uh? And here there is no Oniwabanshuu for you to give orders."

It was his turn to raise his brown and look coldly at her.

"Humph! Leave me be, Aoshi!" she tried to reach out for the bottle.

"I'll leave you be forever when you're healthy and in conditions to stand up for yourself. And that's not the case now, so I'll watch over you as I promised."

Megumi first groaned and Aoshi was expecting any sort of attack or fight back.

She rose to her feet and crossed her arms on the chest.

"Oi, oi..."Megumi sighed. "Right, Okashira. As you wish, Okashira..." she said with an angry tone.

Megumi walked angrily to her room.

Aoshi found himself thinking if he should throw that bottle away or just keep it in its place again. He decided to put it right on place for it was completely empty. After that, he put out the light and walked to the meditation room. He dressed his sleeping yukata and was going to close the door, but he decided to peer outside instead.

Megumi's room was had lights on and the door was closed. Aoshi imagined she could be doing something out of her character again. Without an excuse, he opened the door and she found her sat on the mattress. She didn't turn her face to look at him.

Aoshi realized she was very blushed.

"Won't you dry your hair?"

"No." she answered abruptly.

He came in the room and got the towel. He placed himself behind her and started rubbing the towel on her head.

"Hey! What are you doing?"

"I am drying your hair, of course."

"Okashira..."she said in an annoyed way.

She sighed. But it didn't bother him. Sometimes he'd brush his hands against her cheek and feel they were really hot. Some minutes later, he realized she had her eyes closed.

He shook his own head and he could almost laugh on the scene if he had that much humor inside.

Her body was swinging back and forth and it only didn't fall on the bed because he was right behind her. But she totally lost control of it and she fell against him. He had his arms up, he didn't know what to do. Her hair was almost dry, so she decided to lie her down and cover her.

Carefully, he laid her down, arranging the pillows to make her comfortable. Then, he pulled the blanket to cover half of her body. Aoshi lingered some seconds there, standing right beside her. Her face was pink and warm.

"Sake..." he sighed.

He had turned around and stepped forth to leave the room when something stopped him. He looked behind and saw her eyes were half opened, her hand grabbing hold of his wrist.

"Where are you going?"

"To the meditation room."

She frowned without letting go of his wrist.

"I know I shouldn't but..." she thought to herself, her heart pumping strong.

He was standing still, looking down at her.

"Stay with here with me."

He closed his eyes and sighed.

She leaned herself against the head of the bed. She didn't release him.

"Megumi, I don't think it's..."

"Don't think. Just stay. Please." She tightened her grip.

He could easily put her apart and twist her frail arm but he let himself be caught. Slowly, he went down to the bed and lied beside her.

Aoshi felt the inebriating smell of her dark hair. One lock was just going his direction.

Megumi smiled and laid her dark eyes on his blue ones until she fell asleep. Smiling.

XxXxXxXxXx

It was only four thirty a.m. but Misao was already up. In fact, she hadn't managed to get to sleep not even a second. She was sat on her futon in upright position just looking to the clock.

It was already the eighth day of spring. Her Aoshi-sama would be arriving soon.

She had already checked his room many times to check if everything was in order and she had already made everybody at Aoiya crazy for asking thousand times where they had kept Aoshi-sama's favorite teacup and the works.

The girl rose to her feet once again and checked on her braid for the tenth time in less than one hour. It was bound. Everything was in place. Her big jade eyes were vividly running the walls of her room. The train was supposed to arrive at seven am. Two hours and a half of deep agony ahead. But she'd have a whole day and many more of pure delight, so it was worthwhile.

The clock was ticking on lazily. Misao eyes were very wide. Her fingers were tapping her legs and she didn't know what to do anymore. She could not eat, she was so nervous her stomach could not accept food at all. Misao walked from one side to the other, her long braid swinging, arms folded behind her back, fingers twisting each other.

Omasu twisted on her futon furiously. She tossed and turned, put her hands on her ears but she couldn't sleep also. Misao 's steps were annoying her in such a way. After struggling her will of killing the girl, she decided to leave bed and go to Misao's room. She glanced Okon who, on the other hands, was sleeping like a stone. Omasu walked to Misao's room and opened the door. The girl didn't notice her presence and continued stepping heavily.

"What the hell is this at this time, Misao?"

Distractedly, Misao eyed Omasu on the doorway.

"Uh? What?"

"This coming and going of yours! It's been hours I am trying to sleep but I simply can't!"

"Oh, Omasu, so join me! I can't sleep either!"

Omasu fumed.

"But I can't sleep because of YOU!!! Would you please be a good child and rest your head to sleep this last hours of dawn?"

Misao smiled timidly.

"I am sorry, but I can't sleep! I tried hard enough." She eyed the clock. Fifteen to six. "Aoshi-sama is coming today on the first train. He's going to arrive at seven o'clock."

Omasu sighed and rolled her eyes.

"Oh, Kami, give me strength..."

Misao was once again eyeing the list she had written on things she should check before Aoshi's arrival.

"He didn't mention the time he'd arrive, Misao."

"I know. But I went to the train station and got their times. I've memorized everything. If he's not arriving now, he'd be here tomorrow afternoon."

"And the date?"

"Well, it's one week since he wrote his letter saying he'd not take longer than that. So, it's surely today!"

Omasu gave up. It was impossible to make her sleep again. She lazily went down the stairs.

Misao had already taken her bath long hours ago and was totally dressed on her obi suit, just waiting.

Tick tack, tick tack, tick tack. Her eyes followed the clock movements. Six and a half. She beamed out of her room. She was going down the stairs carefully. She didn't mean to wake anybody up. She wanted to go for him alone. When she was tiptoeing the last step with a very relieved face, she saw Okina materialize right in front of her eyes.

"GRAAAAAAAAAMPS!!!!!! What's this? I almost had a heart attack!"

His face was serious.

"Were you trying to sneak out?"

She shook her head vehemently.

"No! I was just going to the train station. Aoshi-sama is arriving!" she walked to the door.

"Wait! You're not going alone!"

Misao was annoyed.

"Why, gamps?"

"Because it's too dangerous for a child to walk alone the streets this time."

She fumed.

"Graaamps, I am not a child and I am Oniwabanshuu!"

Okina waved his hands.

"Whatever. You're not going alone."

She sighed.

"Kuro!" Okina called.

"Yes!" he showed up immediately as though he knew Okina would call him.

"Take Misao to the train station."

Misao was whining.

Okina narrowed his eyes.

Omasu showed up looking very tired.

"Omasu..." Misao whined with begging eyes.

"No, Misao, I won't interfere."

"Humph! At least check if..."

"Everything's ok, Misao. You've already checked them a thousand times!" she said impatiently.

Shaking her head in annoyance, Misao left the Aoiya, Kuro was right behind her.

XxX

Megumi suddenly woke up. She sat on the bed and breathed heavily. She looked down realizing she had been lying on the brand new bed. Her nostrils were filled by the smell of citric and wood fragrance. She looked to her side.

_Aoshi._

She jumped from the bed in a very abrupt move. In a glance, she felt s sharp pain on her wrists. A thin scream escaped her lips. Aoshi had been woken up by her move and, in defense, he stroke. His hands were around her wrists and he had made her bow back and fall right under his body. He was over her and she was totally immobilized.

When he saw she was no enemy, he immediately released her wrists.

"I am awfully sorry."

She took her wrists very close to her eyes. They were red and aching.

"No problem."

It was not the first time such a thing happened. Aoshi used to be aware even in his sleep. Once he almost cut her neck with his kidachi. Luckily, his swords were not around this time.

She looked at him and blushed. Only then he realized he had been over her. Immediately, he left that position and sat on the bed.

Her head was hurting like hell.

"What are you doing here, Aoshi-san? Weren't you supposed to be at the meditation room?"

He looked surprised.

"You asked me to stay, don't you remember?"

There was panic into her eyes.

"Oh, no, I don't remember! Oh, Kami, did I really ask you to stay?"

He nodded.

Her eyes ran over the bed. At least they were dressed. It made her a bit relieved. Her head was throbbing violently. She took her hand to her forehead and gritted her teeth.

Noticing her painful semblance, Aoshi asked:

"Are you feeling pain?"

"Headache... strong headache."

"Hangover."

She shot him with her dark eyes and furrowed eyebrows.

"What???"

"Don't tell me you don't remember your alcohol orgy from yester night."

She really fell in despair.

"Orgy???"

He nodded.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!!! What did I do?" she thought to herself.

"We didn't...did we?" her look was desperate and anguished.

"No. Don't worry." He said calmly.

Megumi clasped her hands together.

"Thanks God!" she thought.

Aoshi saw she was thanking heaven and thought it was very strange. He raised one bow, his blue eyes with a teasing shine. He'd play her game.

"But what if we did?"

She turned his head to him. Her dark eyes were wide.

"You told me we didn't."

"But you don't remember anything, do you?"

"No." she was visibly uncomfortable.

"Well, so you really can't tell. What if I am lying?"

She raised one brow to him and narrowed her dark eyes, her hand was still on her head.

"You wouldn't play with such."

"Well, actually. But..."

"But what? Did I behave bad???" she was exasperated.

He left the bed and walked to the door.

"But you shouldn't drink that much. That's all."

Aoshi went on the hallway and Megumi threw her body against the mattress. She was relieved. She should really policy herself not to drink anymore. It was a close call and her head was just exploding. She turned her back to the door, grabbed Aoshi's pillow and hid her face deep into it.

"By the way... since when has he been teasing?" she thought to herself.

XxXx

Oh, I got SOOOOOOOOOOO happy with your last review, Leila! Imagine a girl with an absolutely wide smile right in front of the computer. It was me! I got happy and flattered by each word you wrote! I think I never got so happy in reading a review. I appreciate A LOT you liked this chapter and that you thought it was well written. So it gives me power to improve and try to make things better so that you'll enjoy! They went for the western bed... but nothing dangerous happened. :p

This is me very happy, spending fireworks...


	27. Rebuilding

Chapter XXVII - Rebuilding

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi...) I am not making money with them. And you already know all the craziness and the works...

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech. (You also know this, right???? Larissa no baka!)

XxXxXxXx

Misao entered the carriage happily with Kuro guiding it. Although it was not her will that Kuro would also come, the perspective of seeing Aoshi again was just taking everything away from her mind.

They arrived at Kyoto Train Station when it was around ten minutes to seven. Misao sighed in relief.

"Thanks god we managed to arrive in time!"

Kuro didn't answer. He just eyed the girl standing in front of him and smiled.

Misao was euphoric and nervous. Her jade eyes had a different shine and they seemed bigger and more childish than usual. Nobody would ever believe she was already nineteen. And who on Earth would picture her by Aoshi's side as his wife? Kuro thought she fitted Yahiko better. Despite their age, he thought their personality matched. But the boy was barely a child and he had Tsubame and Kuro himself was not there to think and guess on people's affective life.

Seven sharp. Misao heartbeats could be heard from one kilometer away. She eyed the rails anxiously, her hands clasped together, her head shaking, one foot tapping vehemently on the floor.

"It's late!" she grinned to Kuro.

He only nodded.

"Oh, gee... how should I greet him? Should I open my arms and run and hold him? Hum... what if he gets too shy? Should I just smile at him and welcome him back? No... then I'd be too cold. And now? whatshouldIdo, whatshouldIdo, whatshouldIdo?"

Finally, one black train stopped right on the platform Kuro and Misao were standing and waiting.

Many people got out from the train. Misao had a big nervous smile on her face, her hands were squeezing each other in anxiety. And they waited until everybody had gotten out of it. No sign of Aoshi.

Misao's smile seemed to have faded away.

"He... didn't... come... in... this... one."

Kuro placed one hand on her shoulder.

"Don't bother, Misao-chan. There's another train arriving tomorrow afternoon. I can come with you again and wait for him if you want."

The girl's face was almost buried into her chest. She didn't raise it to smile sadly back at Kuro's words.

They left the train station walking slowly back to the Aoiya.

The street seemed totally empty to Misao. She could point innumerous feet coming and going but they meant nothing for her.

"Aoshi-sama..."

"Come, Misao-chan, enter the carriage." Kuro said.

The girl was so lost into her thoughts she forgot they had come by carriage. Kuro helped her getting in and then he went to the front part of it, he worked sometimes as a coachman.

Some minutes later, they arrived at the Aoiya. Hearing the carriage, everybody, they were already at the main room before, ran to the porch.

Okina was the first to reach the porch and saw Kuro leaving the carriage and opening the door. Later on, he reached his hand and a shadowed girl came out of it. Everybody at Aoiya sighed. Misao was back without Aoshi.

The girl passed by them and went inside right up the stairs. They had the will to ask her what was exactly wrong but they didn't. They just confirmed facts with Kuro.

"Yes, she waited but he didn't come in t his train. And then she just fell into that mood."

Okon and Omasu had pitiful faces. Okina just brushed his beard with his fingers.

"We told her she couldn't be sure of his arrival."

Some minutes later, Misao heard someone knocking on her door.

"Who's that?" she asked.

"Okon. May I enter?"

"Yes."

Okon entered the room and saw Misao sat on her futon looking to her own feet. She approached the girl and sat beside her. Later on, she passed a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't get sad, Misao. He's returning, isn't he? You said yourself that there's another train arriving tomorrow afternoon, right?"

The girl nodded.

"So, gather your strength and you happiness and wait for him. He'll come back for sure and I doubt he'd like to see you sad."

A smile got to Misao's lips.

"Really?"

Okon smiled.

"Of course! He can't run away from you, can he?"

"No!" she punched the air.

So Okon kissed Misao's forehead and rose to her feet. When she walked out of her room she glanced behind and saw the usual grin at the girl's face.

XxX

Megumi smelled food and Aoshi's scent once more into the room.

"It's time to get up, the clinic must be opened."

She tossed and turned on the bed, stirring and stretching her body.

"Oh, Kami!"

She knew of her responsibilities as a doctor but her head was just consuming her.

Aoshi sat on the bed and put the tray he had prepared for her right on her reach.

She sighed and finally took her head out of the pillows.

"My eyes can barely stand the light."

"Still the same headache?"

She nodded.

"You don't need to tease, ok?" she had a bad face.

He raised one black eyebrow.

"I was not teasing."

Megumi sat on the bad and gave him a suspicious look.

She took the teacup and made it to her lips.

"Won't you eat anything?"

She looked at the food. Everything seemed delicious but she was feeling sick only to look at it.

"No... I feel sick only to look at food."

"You've been too sick these days."

"What do you mean?"

"Me? Nothing."

Her suspicious look was still laying on him. But his face was emotionless and just looked like the marble statue he uses to be.

"Today is your first day at the Hospital, isn't it?"

"Yes..."

And they didn't say anything else. He just stood by her side, scanning her with his blue eyes while she was sipping her tea. When she was done with it, she stood up and went to the bathroom. Aoshi carried the tray away.

She was washing her face and seeing it reflected on the water.

"I have to remember of never drinking alcohol again..."

Several minutes later she was there in the clinic, working as happily as the hangover could allow her. She took something to decrease the alcohol effects but fortunately, she only had simple cases today. Some skin allergies, colds, twisted ankles and such. Nothing that would demand too much from her. When she was about to close the clinic, she saw a young woman rushing into the anteroom.

"Takani-sensei!"

"Saeko-chan!"

The girl was panting, one hand on her heart. She was also blushing a lot due to the heat outside.

"Sit down, please."

The girl sat down and Megumi closed the anteroom. No more patients there for today. Smiling, she turned to Saeko:

"How can I help you? Is there something wrong with your mom?"

"Mother is fine! Thanks to Shinomori-sensei." The girl's face acquired a violent red shade when she said Aoshi's name.

Megumi continued smiling.

"He told me of her rescue. And I didn't get amused he could do all of that. Aoshi-san is a very skilled man."

"I am taking care of my mother just as he told me to do."

"You're a good daughter."

"Thanks, Takani-sensei!" the girl bowed her head.

Megumi realized Saeko had her eyes running all over the room.

"And how are those sweeties, Masanobu-chan and Shuuichi-chan?"

The girl laughed and jerked her head.

"Oh, they are doing really fine. They take a good care of Mother and of the house despite their young age."

They boys were twins and both should be about nine years old. Saeko was nineteen. Their father had passed away seven years ago and her mother worked as a rice cropper. Megumi knew them three years ago when she was Guenzai-sensei's assistant.

Suddenly, the girl's jade eyes got shadowed.

"Takani-sensei... I ... I am sorry to bother you with this but... I wondered if you know anybody who needs a girl who is really willing to work."

Megumi blinked and asked back:

"I suppose this girl is nobody else but you."

"Yes."

"What kind of job are you looking for?"

"Any. I don't mind doing anything, Takani-sensei. I know I have no experience, I didn't use to work before Mother's accident. But Mother's in bed and she can't work. That's why I am desperately looking for a job."

Megumi sighed and looked up. The girl had her head bowed, her bangs were hiding her eyes. Her black long hair was braided. Her hands were squeezing the pink fabric of her kimono.

"Yes." Megumi finally spoke. "I know of someone who has an opening for a job. And I guess you'd fit it perfectly."

In a glance, Saeko raised her head and smiled widely. Her eyes had an intense shine.

"Really???"

Megumi nodded.

"Oh, Takani-sensei! How wonderful! Could you introduce me to that person?"

Megumi smiled and stretched her body on the cushioned bench.

"You already know this person."

"Really? Who is it?"

"Me!"

Saeko didn't believe that.

"You, Takani-sensei???"

"Yes! I was really thinking on hiring someone to help me out here at the clinic. Sometimes I have many things to do. I used to have an assistant but she just moved to Yokohama. It's a rather simple job. You just have to book the patients, take a look at some papers; you're going to be my secretary. And I can also teach you some things on Medicine."

The girl would explode. She left her cushioned seat and threw herself at Megumi's feet. Saeko got Megumi's hands and shook and kissed them.

"You're wonderful, Takani-sensei, you're really wonderful!"

Megumi blushed.

"Come on, Saeko-chan!"

Feeling the nice food smell coming from her kitchen, Megumi asked:

"Aren't you hungry, Saeko-chan?"

The girl mumbled something Megumi could not understand.

"I am inviting you to have lunch with me here at my house today."

"Thank you, Takani-sensei.

Megumi opened the door of her house and both women entered.

"Aoshi-san???"

"Yes?" his voice came from the kitchen.

"Get one more plate because we're having someone else for lunch today."

Aoshi showed up at the kitchen door and saw Saeko.

"Takakura-dono." He bowed his head.

"Shinomori-sensei..." the girl bowed deeply both in respect and to hide the violent pink color she had gotten on her cheeks.

Aoshi returned to the kitchen. Megumi told the girl to sit down and wait a bit. Then, Megumi also went into the kitchen.

Aoshi noticed she was smiling.

"So the headache is gone."

"Yes, it is. And I am so happy Saeko-chan is staying here for lunch. Guess what. I picked her as my secretary."

"That's very good for both of you."

Megumi carried the dishes to the main room and told Aoshi to go there and let things with her.

'Or maybe you want that girl to think that you, her Shinomori-sensei, are actually a household."

Aoshi pierced Megumi with his blue eyes but he didn't fight the teasing back. In fact, it was relieving for him to see that she was teasing again after so many years. Things seemed to be turning back to its place.

Lunchtime was pretty nice. Megumi was looking very happy. Maybe too nervous about her first day there at the hospital. She was really babbling and eating a lot. Aoshi was calm and quiet as always. Saeko was laughing and talking a lot to Megumi too but her eyes would sometimes lie on the beautiful features of the man sat by her side. Those times, she'd bow her head to hide the hot sensation she had on her cheeks.

It was pretty strange for her that Megumi and Aoshi lived together without being married or without any apparent love relationship. He told he was taking care of her but she just looked great. A bit paler than normal, that's right, but she was even working again. But the strangest of all was her own behavior when she got closer to Shinomori-sensei. Saeko had never blushed so hard in her whole life.

After lunch, Saeko said goodbye and told she'd be back on Monday to start working. Megumi went to change her clothes for she had to go to the hospital.

Dressing a beige kimono and lilac smock on, Megumi showed up on the main room several minutes later. She gathered the medicine box and for her surprise, she saw Aoshi was not dressing a yukata anymore, but a black western suit. She blinked in confusion.

"Where are you going dressed this way?"

He detached his body from the wall he had been leaning for the past ten minutes and spoke.

"I am going to the Government Headquarters. They must have already mailed Kyoto. I have to inform them I am not there. And talking of Kyoto, I have to send them another message telling I am not coming back as early as they expect me to."

Megumi raised a thin brow.

"You're not coming back?"

"I don't intend to, at least in a while."

They walked through the door, walking the streets side by side.

Megumi decided to get the conversation again.

"But, are you traveling or are you staying here in Tokyo?"

"I don't know yet. That's why I have to go to the headquarters today. There's more than one week I returned from Hokkaido and I haven't gone there yet. I have to check on things, see what's going on now, if there's something interesting for me around. If there isn't, I thought I could linger here." This time, his blue eyes met hers, which were eying him with big concern. "Unless you don't want me to stay."

She almost smiled.

"I... I... do not mind if you stay." She said coolly. But in fact, she was willing to go to him, kiss him right there in the middle of the street and tell him happily she was extremely happy for he was staying.

Hearing that, he raised his brows but he made them back to normal way in a glance.

"So, I will look for an inn right after I come back from the headquarters. If it pleases you."

Her heart jumped. Was he teasing again? Was he saying this just to scan her reaction?

"Do as you wish. But you know you are welcome there in my, uh, our(?) house..." she said and bowed her head the most she could to hide her pink cheeks and her disconcerted look.

"Aa. Thank you." it was what he mumbled.

The hospital was one block ahead. Aoshi took her till the entrance and then he followed his own way.

Megumi entered the hospital and found Matsuyama-sensei waiting for her along another man.

"Takani-sensei." He bowed.

Megumi bowed in response.

"This is our administrator, Sawanoguchi-san."

The other man, older than both Megumi and Matsyuama, bowed and smiled to her. He reminded her of Okina. They should be the same age. But that man doesn't had that long beard nor that hairstyle of Okina.

"Takani-sensei, would you please follow me to my office? We have to set some things and you have some papers to sign too." Sawanoguchi-san's voice was husky and calm.

"Sure."

The old man turned his back to her and they walked the hallway until they got to a staircase. They went up two floors until they got to the office.

Sawanoguchi-san explained the job to Megumi, handed her some papers to sign and told her she'd be really start working on Monday. Later on, he called Matsuyama-sensei and asked him to show Megumi the hospital and introduce her to the staff.

It was a calm Friday afternoon. Many doctors were roaming on the beautiful garden set on the yard. There was a small restaurant there whose view was the extremely beautiful garden. Matsuyama-san introduced Megumi to everybody on their way.

Megumi was not shocked that many of those men would look her down. She knew what prejudice was. But she was not there to be pushed down by those looks. She was there to show them what she was made of and they'd surely respect her sooner or later.

The hospital was very big and had many lighted alleys. Everything was so clean and so clear. There was a strong western influence on everything, except the garden.

By five o'clock, they were done with the introducing and showing-thing. Matsuyama-sensei invited Megumi to drink a cup of coffee at the restaurant.

They went there and she gazed the beautiful garden while sipping the hot dark drink. Matsuyama-sensei was visibly delighted by the presence of such a woman right before her eyes. Her look was brilliant and she had a small smile toward the beautiful flowers.

"Takani-sensei likes flowers."

Megumi turned her eyes to him.

"Oh, sorry, I got distracted by the garden. Yes, I do like flowers. And this garden is so beautiful, very well raised."

"It's a relief. Something cheerful and colorful in the middle of this white lights and walls."

Megumi smiled.

"But today things are really calm here. Not many emergencies, no complicated surgeries."

Megumi kept on smiling.

"I am really looking forward to starting here soon."

"Just wait until Monday. But I guess you already should feel like part of all of this now."

She smiled once more. The afternoon was getting less hot and the bright colors were beginning to turn into a yellowish one.

After they were done with the coffee, both stood up and walked to the entrance room. Megumi was already going home and so was Matsuyama-sensei. They crossed the door to the front yard of the hospital.

"Takani-sensei, I'd like to accompany you back home."

"It's not necessary, sensei." A cool calm male voice was heard from behind.

Megumi knew perfectly whose voice was that. Matsuyama-sensei turned around and noticed the tall man dressed in a western suit. He recognized Aoshi, for sure.

"Oh!" he said embarrassed. "Your fiancé, Takani-sensei."

Megumi was parting her lips to say he was not her fiancé when Aoshi approached her and bowed to the other man. His body was half turned to make his way home.

"Good evening, sensei."

The embarrassment of the man was quite noticeable.

"Good evening, Takani-sensei and..."

"Shinomori Aoshi." Aoshi said coldly, his blue eyes narrowed to the other man.

"Good evening, Shinomori-san."

Both Aoshi and Megumi left after that. They were walking side by side. It was surely impressive how people were mistaking Aoshi for her husband or fiancé. Aoshi was frowning for an unknown reason. Megumi had her brown eyes on him.

"Why are you frowning this much, Shinomori-san?"

He thought the formality was not suitable.

"Nothing, Takani-sensei."

"How was there at the headquarters?"

"Pretty calm. Nothing special by now. But my intention was to stay in Tokyo anyway and I saw they'd really need me here."

"Good. Have you sent the letter to people at Kyoto?"

"Aa. And what about your day at he hospital?"

"Calm..."

The afternoon was giving in to the evening. The sky had a beautiful shade of violet and lilac. There was a cool wind and the refreshing smell of flowers. Megumi smiled for the wind was blowing the strands of her hair and she failed in binding them together again. Aoshi was still frowning enough.

It was very close to Megumi's house now.

"Are you facing any problem, Aoshi-san?"

"Why do you ask that, Megumi?"

They crossed the well-raised garden of Megumi's house. She got closer to the door and opened it.

"You're still frowning."

"Oh, don't bother." He closed the door behind their back.

She stretched her arms and Aoshi lit a lantern.

"You don't have to work tomorrow, do you?" he asked her while taking off the coat of his suit.

"Nope. I'll be starting only on Monday." She eyed him. "Why?"

"Curiosity only." He stepped on the hallway going to the bedroom.

Megumi was still in the main room. Aoshi made the knot of his navy blue tie go looser and removed it. Then, he started unbuttoning his inner white shirt.

"Why didn't you tell Matsuyama-sensei you were not my fiancé as he thought?"

Aoshi heard Megumi's voice from the room.

It took him some seconds to reply.

"Nothing. Maybe he'll not flirt anymore. You're both there to work not to flirt."

He imagined Megumi would be on her "fox mode".

He sensed her steps and soon she was on the door. She was wearing only the kimono now, the lilac smock was folded and hanging on her left arm. A teasing smile on those rosy lips.

He had his hands on the last button of his shirt. She eyed him from top to bottom.

"You were jealous."

Aoshi got shocked. But he didn't let it show. He unbuttoned the last button of his white shirt now pending on his shoulders. His blue eyes just as calm as ever.

"Jealous? Me?"

It was true. He wished to cut the throat of that Matsuyama-sensei.

She nodded wickedly.

He shook his head. She got closer to him slowly. Those damn brown eyes scanning him, piercing his skin. He didn't know why but he felt completely naked that time. He sat on the bed and watched her approach. She got extremely close, her eyes focused on his open shirt. Then, her eyes trailed to his lips and deep into his own eyes at last.

"Have you drunk today?" he asked her.

She stopped right in front of him.

"No. Not... even... a... drop." She bowed over him.

He raised his eyebrows.

"I am leaving to Yokohama tomorrow."

Megumi stopped.

"Really?" she got in upright position again.

"Yes."

Her eyes seemed to have lost the wicked shine they had some seconds ago.

"I'll be by the sea. I have to watch a suspicious warehouse on the docks. Nothing serious or dangerous. It almost feels like vacation. And there's going to be a party later, tomorrow night."

"Oh... but why you? Isn't this something in charge of your men? You're their superior." she mumbled uninterested.

"I decided to go into action again. I know my role requires me sitting, thinking and watching, giving orders straight from the Emperor, just acting in extreme situations. But my onmitsu heart sometimes rejects such. Anyway you told me you don't have to work this weekend, ne?"

She shook her head.

He stood up. His body was right on hers for she had stopped so close to him there was almost no room for him to stand. He bowed his head, his chin brushed her shoulder. He mumbled on her ear, his lips almost touching her lobe.

"So, wouldn't you like to come with me?"

"To the seaside at Yokohama? Is that your wish?"

"Yes..." he whispered hotly at her ear.

She breathed in. His breath against the skin of her neck, his own neck right in front of her eyes. Their bodies touching. Suddenly, the wicked shine came to her eyes again and she raised one hand and slid one finger on the side of his neck. Quickly, she moved back and ran to the door.

"So, may your wish be done, Okashira."

Then, she left the room and her steps got lost into the silent house.

XxXxXx

Megumi and Aoshi are just two things... about to erupt, I'd say... but let's see what comes next. I've got some nice things in mind but I still have to think on connections... I just know they're nice. I wonder there's someone who will like something special in next chapter... well, at least I did... and started bubbling while writing. /blinks

Is there any witchcraft out there to attract reviewers???

I am so excited. Yesterday night I just got one insight about a fic for Aoshi. Aoshi only. And I think it's going to turn out ok. I just hope I won't abandon Until The Dark...


	28. By The Sea

Chapter XXVIII – By The Sea

I don't own Ruroni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi...) I am not making money with them. And you already know all the craziness and the works...

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech. (You also know this, right???? Larissa no baka! /shakes the head in disapproval.)

XxXxXxXx

The next morning, Aoshi and Megumi were up very early. They had slept very late the past night. The train to Yokohama would depart at fifteen to seven. They had already had breakfast and let things clean. Megumi made only a small bag, they'd be out for the weekend only. She packed underwear, socks, four smocks, four kimonos, two yukatas and an expensive violet kimono for the party. She also couldn't be apart of her medicine box... but not the standard one, she was taking a small one filled with the most important things.

She had no idea of what Aoshi was taking. He also held a small bag. He was wearing his standard clothes and the trench coat, of course. And the two kodachis were sheathed right under it.

"Shall we go? The carriage is already waiting."

"Yes."

Aoshi got her bag and they both walked to the door. The coachman smiled and placed their luggage inside. Then, he opened the carriage door and Aoshi stretched his hand to help Megumi go inside. He also entered and sat right in front of her.

The carriage rushed on the streets.

"Aoshi-san?"

"Yes" he opened his eyes to look at Megumi.

She took an envelope from inside her sleeves.

"I'd like to let this at Himura's. It's just a note telling my friends I am spending weekend out and that they don't worry about it."

Aoshi nodded. He opened the small window and talked to the coachman the whereabouts of the dojo. Sometime later, there they were.

Megumi knew they could not take longer or they'd miss the train, so she asked the coachman to deliver the envelope right under the dojo's door.

After that, they followed their way to the train station.

In no time they had already embarked. The train was crowded. Megumi sat by the window and Aoshi was right by her side. There were many people on the platform, waving goodbye. Some were crying, others smiling. Megumi felt her heart heavy for not having someone to wave for her her whole life. Only some years ago she had found peace and love with her stepfamily: Ken-san, Kaoru, Yahiko, Sano... but they were not there to wave goodbye for her.

Then, she got angry with herself for being so foolish. She'd not move forever, it was only one weekend away at Yokohama. With Aoshi. She didn't know if she should feel worried or happy for she was going with him.

The train departed. Many waves and goodbyes were given from inside and outside the train. Aoshi seemed not to realize that warm show of feelings and had his eyes shut. Megumi looked at him. His head was slightly bowed, his bangs shadowing his closed eyelids. He was not sleeping at all, that she was sure. Well... almost sure. When it comes to Aoshi nobody can ever tell. His arms were crossed over his broad chest and the trench coat was spread on the seat, veiling the two kodachis right under it. He was absolutely attractive.

Her eyes departed from him and went to the other passengers. There was a young lady dressed in a luxurious beige western dress right beside them. She was reading a thick-cover book. Her orange waved hair was carefully braided and there was a small hat with a veil on the top of her head. Her delicate hands bore white gloves. The sleeves of her dress were tight up to the elbow and they would become fluffy until they reached her shoulders. The body of the dress was also very very tight. Megumi wondered how could that young woman breathe that way. Her skirts were immaculate and fluffy. The woman realized Megumi's look and looked back at her, a pure smile on her glossy lips. Megumi smiled back at her. The blue eyes of the young woman met hers. She talked to Megumi.

"Are you going to Yokohama?" she said with a very strong accent, her words were taking long to leave her lips.

Megumi nodded.

"Yes."

"I hope we have a nice trip."

"Me too."

"Do you live there?"

Megumi smiled and shook her head. The beautiful strands of her black hair gracefully danced in the air.

"No. I live in Tokyo."

That time, Aoshi opened his eyes and looked to both sides. That seemed to make the young woman go shy. She smiled timidly at Megumi and returned her clear eyes to the book she was reading previously.

"Shinomori Aoshi, the icicle everybody is afraid of..." she thought to herself.

Megumi didn't look at Aoshi. She turned her head to the window and chose to look at the green grass and the flowers on the way. The wind was throwing the black strands of her perfumed hair behind.

Some of those strands went to Aoshi. They brushed his hands playfully. He kept his look on Megumi's half profile. She was smiling timidly, her both hands on the window. Her hair was fallen over her light gray smock. She surely liked the contact with nature, the smell of green grass. She spent a long time like that.

Aoshi returned to his thoughts once again. Realizing that Aoshi had taken his eyes from her, Megumi seated back the way she was doing before. She was tired. The sleeping hours that night were not enough. The swing of the train seemed to gently cradle her. People had lowered their voices. Many were reading, others were browsing around. Her eyelids were so heavy. She was closing and opening them, rubbing her eyes, trying to stay awake. But it seemed impossible. As the passengers grew quieter and the train was going ahead, she found herself completely lost into sleep. And she finally gave in.

Aoshi opened his eyes in curiosity because he had felt Megumi's body swinging back and forth and hitting him many times. He looked at her with the corner of his eyes. For his amusement, she was fast asleep. Not to let her fall, he passed a hand on her shoulders and tightened his grip. He did it discretely and made sure nobody was looking at them. So, her head came to his shoulder and he let it rest right there.

Twenty-nine kilometers and almost two hours later, the train had arrived at Yokohama's train station. Megumi was still asleep. Before the train would stop at the platform, Aoshi turned himself to Megumi and called her name right on her year. He was almost sure it wouldn't work for she was a heavy sleeper. He had to gently shake her. Only then she opened her eyes and saw his stoic face right before hers.

"We've arrived." He said in his usual deep voice.

Megumi lifted her head from his shoulder. She rubbed her eyes instinctively. Then, she stretched her arms.

The train stopped on the platform and they both stood up. Aoshi carried the bags out of the train.

Megumi looked around. Many people were also coming and going on a Saturday morning. Yokohama was a warm and bright city. The sea-scent was everywhere. And Megumi missed that for some reason. Although living in Tokyo, she had rarely seen the sea or felt that pleasant smell.

Discretely, a tall man dressed in a western suit approached Megumi and Aoshi. He was surely older than Aoshi, younger than Saitou. His eyes were very narrow and his black hair was carefully trimmed and combed behind.

"Shinomori-sensei?" he asked Aoshi.

The younger man nodded.

"Nakato-san." The other man bowed. "I am here to take you to the hotel you are staying."

Only then he looked at Megumi.

"Is this young lady with you, Shinomori-sensei?"

"Yes. She's Takani-sensei."

"Pardon me for not noticing you before, sensei." He bowed deeply to Megumi. "Shall we go?"

The man stretched to carry the luggage but Aoshi dismissed him with a move of his head.

They walked out of the train station and entered the carriage.

Aoshi had his eyes closed. Megumi was looking the city through the window. Nakato bore a slight smile at their direction.

"Are you also in this mission under Shinomori-sensei's command, Takani-sensei?"

Megumi quickly turned her eyes to him.

"No." Aoshi answered first. "She's not here to investigate. She's a doctor."

The other man just mumbled a "Yes" and shut his mouth until they arrived at the hotel.

The three of them got out of the carriage. Megumi looked at the Hotel. A western one, for sure. It was not like one of Japanese inns at all. It was a three-floored building, painted in white. The front garden was simple and very green. They entered the hall. The marble floor reflected their figures. There was a counter right before of them made out of granite. A smiley Japanese man came to them. It was Nakato who spoke.

"Shinomori-sensei and his wife."

Megumi looked at Aoshi. She was getting infuriated for everyone was connecting them that way. But Aoshi didn't look at her at all. His face had no sign of emotions, not even a muscle moved.

"Oh, yes..." the man behind the counter said while running his eyes on a black covered book. Then, he turned around and handed Aoshi a key. The room was number 206.

Megumi was pretty impatient. She was not willing to stay into the same room with Aoshi. In fact, she was, but she had promised herself to be the most distant from him she could.

"Excuse me." Aoshi spoke coolly. "But Takani-sensei is not my wife. It's going to be very embarrassing if we have to share a room. I am sure we both think it'd be better if she had her own room."

Nakato and the other man behind the counter looked really embarrassed.

"Oh, I am sorry!" the counterman said. He bowed deeply to Megumi. Then, he turned around and got another key and handed her. Number 205.

"Thank you." Megumi said.

A young man came and carried their luggage. Nakato approached Aoshi and handed him a rather thick envelope.

Aoshi nodded in response and Nakato bowed to both of them.

"Takani-sensei. Shinomori-sensei." And he left.

The luggage carrier asked Megumi and Aoshi to follow him. They went up a black granite staircase. Megumi noticed everything on that hotel was luxurious and on their place. She was the first to stay in her room.

"Everything is prepared inside, madam." The carrier said.

Megumi got pretty surprised by the way he addressed to her. _Madam_. Pretty curious.

Aoshi nodded to her and she closed the door. Some seconds later, she heard Aoshi's door being shut. It was just beside hers.

Megumi looked at the room. The walls were painted in a light salmon color and they held some western paintings of landscapes and flowers with rich frames. The ceiling was beige. There was a beautiful chandelier hanging up her head. There were some tables and cushioned chairs and even a salmon satin chaise-long. There was a wood dresser right by the window with a large mirror and a cushioned seat. The bed was large and beautiful. It had net lace curtains. Megumi sat on the mattress and it was really soft. The salmon shade of the silken bedclothes was very beautiful. It also had many pillows. Megumi took of her socks and opened her bag. She dragged a yukata from inside.

After this, Megumi made her way to a closed door. She opened it and it was a clean white bathroom. The bathtub was filled with clean steaming water. Right beside it, there were many glasses containing colored liquids. Megumi took of her kimono and entered the water. Hot and pleasant. From inside, she took some of the glasses and smelled them. Nice smells she felt. The glasses were labeled and they had writings in three different languages. There was a small label that was not there originally and it had Japanese writings. Shampoo, oil, and everything. Megumi decided to take a bubble bath. She thought everything was very posh. She lingered in there until the water began to lose its heat. Her eyes were closed and her mind was empty. She wrapped herself in fluffy towels and opened the door.

Steam came from the bathroom.

Megumi sighed and walked lazily to the bed. She sat there and took an aquamarine kimono from her bag. The towel touched the satin sheets and Megumi stood up, dressing herself carefully. She tied the kimono and put on her socks. She looked at the smocks but she decided not to wear any. She walked to the dresser and sat by it. She got her hairbrush and started brushing her hair carefully while gazing over the window.

The view was so beautiful! The sea was just in front of her eyes. There were children running on the sand, young ladies walking with their umbrellas, western dressed man talking and walking nearby. The sea smell and the waves seemed to carry her away. She smiled happily.

Suddenly, someone knocked on the door. Megumi walked to it and she recognized his voice.

"It's me."

She opened the door and Aoshi was standing right on the threshold. Megumi looked to both sides trying to dismiss her shock. She didn't know what to do. He was handsome but she knew something on him bothered her. It was the way he had his hair. It was exactly the way she had seen him by Kanryuu's. She mentally shook her head.

"What's the problem?" he asked.

"No... no problem." She forced a smile.

He focused his blue eyes on her. He was dressed in one of his dark western suits, the trench coat over it, the two kodachis should be carefully placed under. There was also that envelope she had seen Nakato handing him on his hand.

With his hair that way, his look seemed to pierce deeper, the shade of blue seemed colder and warmer at the same time. Megumi was visible disconcerted.

"I just came to tell you I am leaving now. I thought you'd like to know the city, so I asked one woman out of the hotel staff to take you for a walk around. It's almost midday, you must be hungry. I am sorry but I can't have lunch with you, but your guide will suggest you something good for sure."

Megumi nodded and said lowly:

"Thank you, Aoshi-san."

Aoshi nodded and made his was to the staircase. Megumi entered and shut the door on her back.

While going down the stairs, Aoshi tried to make the nice scent that came from her linger in his nostrils. For his disappointment, it faded fast as he entered the carriage.

XxX

Megumi thought it was keen of Aoshi to think of her and prepare her a tour while he'd be away. She thought of the way he had been then. She thought he could be gentle if he wanted to. And she thought how her life had changed in one week, in how she had changed in one week. The crying, weepy and depressed woman was no more. She got happy she still had her spirit quite locked inside of her and that she managed to put it out once again. It was sure and clear she loved Aoshi but it wouldn't cost her pride or life or her child's one. That thought made her freeze.

Megumi found herself lying on the comfortable bed. Her fingers were lazily making circles on the bedclothes.

"My child..." she mumbled while looking to the satiny bed cover.

She thought it was time for Aoshi to know. And she didn't fear his reaction anymore. Her pride and spirit were back and if he decided to abandon her, she'd have strength to carry on. Abandon her? Since when has she got any right over him?

A knock on the door brought her back to reality. She leaped out of the bed, straightened her kimono and opened the door.

A smiley young woman was standing there, dressed in a black and white outfit.

"Takani-sensei?" she bowed deeply.

"Yes." Megumi answered.

"I am Toki Ina. Shinomori-san asked me to take you on a walk around the city. I imagined he already mentioned it to you."

Megumi nodded.

"Yes, he did. Call me Megumi, please, Ina-san. I am ready. Are we leaving now?"

Ina's smile widened.

"Sure, Megumi-san!"

Megumi turned inside the room and caught her purse that was laying right over a beautiful wood table.

Both women left the hotel.

"Would you like to walk or take a carriage?" Ina fondly asked to Megumi.

"I'd rather walk. Yokohama is beautiful and I do like this sea scent."

The other woman nodded and they both walked on the streets.

"Where are you from, Megumi-san?"

"I currently live in Tokyo, but I am actually from Aizu."

"There's no sea in Aizu, right?"

"No, there isn't." the simple mention of Aizu was enough to make Megumi's heart longing and even rather sad.

Maybe the other woman realized it and started showing things of Yokohama. The city pumped into Western way for it was one of the few cities with harbors open to western ships during Bakufu and Bakumatsu.

Megumi was finding everything very interesting and new. She really liked knowing new places like that.

At midday sharp, they both entered a traditional Japanese restaurant. Megumi had seen so much of Western influences on the hotel she thought it was a shock to her eyes to enter such a Japanese place.

"Let's try some cuisine from Yokohama, Megumi-san?"

"Yes!" Megumi nodded in enthusiasm.

The restaurant was beautiful, cozy and quite familiar. Dark wooden tables and chairs, and inside had an orange-tinted light. A waitress wrapped in a pale orange kimono came to the two women.

Ina looked at Megumi and asked if she wanted to try their wonderful broiled eel.

Megumi nodded for she was really looking forward to Yokohama's feeling.

The waitress returned sooner than expected with their dishes. She served them.

Megumi took her chopsticks to her mouth and tasted that sample.

"And then?" Ina asked her in a smiley face.

Megumi arched both eyebrows.

"Oh, it's tasty. If Yokohama cuisine is all like this..."

The woman smiled more and also ate a morsel out of her food. Megumi decided not to order any sake.

Lunch was pretty nice. After that, Ina got some bills out of her purse and paid for the food. She turned to Megumi who was really looking amused.

"Shinomori-san provided enough money for this."

They walked for long four hours after lunch. Megumi really enjoyed the city. They went to every important spot, including the bay the black ships had anchored many years ago.

Megumi and Ina made their way to the hotel. Megumi stopped by the beach, looking to the sea.

"Thank you for this tour, Ina-san."

"Thank Shinomori-san, Megumi-san. He's the responsible for that."

"But, anyway, you were a nice guide."

"Thanks."

"You can return to the hotel. I am staying here on the beach. Don't worry, I know the way back."

"You really like the sea, ne, Megumi-san?"

Megumi's gaze was lost into the blue waves. She walked down on the sand, Ina came right after her.

"I do like the sea. It's so peaceful. I want to have my child by the sea." She said distractedly.

Ina's eyes immediately looked at Megumi's abdomen. She had a thin waist though. Realizing Ina's surprise and her own slip, Megumi smiled and mended.

"When it's time for me to have one, of course."

The other woman smiled and said:

"Sure, Megumi-san. I have to return now. Sayonara."

"Sayonara." Megumi replied. Then, her eyes focused on the horizon and she felt a strange fulfilling happiness into her heart.

XxX

Aoshi had already returned to the hotel and he was on the lobby when Ina arrived. He raised her eyes to her and she came closer.

"Shinomori-san. Takani-sensei is at the beach, she refused to come back to the hotel right now. She told me she knew how to come back."

He simply nodded. Ina passed by him to the inner part of the hotel.

Aoshi gazed people walking around the lobby. He was thoughtful about the party that night. It was five o'clock. The afternoon was giving place to evening. He waited on the lobby for Megumi's arrival. People entered and left. Five fifteen. Aoshi stood up and walked outside. He'd look for Megumi.

Aoshi walked the streets, his eyes focusing ahead. He was trying to sense her ki. Walking more and getting to he beach, Aoshi spotted a female figure dressed in an aquamarine kimono. She was sat very near the sea.

The afternoon was getting an orange shade. The beach was empty. The wind was blowing softly. Aoshi sensed people walking the streets right on his back. He walked on the sand, his shoes were getting dirty.

It was really beautiful. She was sat there, carelessly. The breeze was blowing her dark hair behind. He got closer and sensed she was smiling.

"Megumi." His deep voice got to her hear.

Immediately, she turned her head to him.

He found amazing the bright and pure smile on her lips. Her eyes were also bearing a happy glimmer, they looked like amber because of the sunset. He didn't know what to say. He just focused his eyes on her and let her dazzle him with such happiness.

"Isn't it beautiful, Aoshi-san?"

Aoshi was about to say she was beautiful and that her beauty that time had to match. But there was something restraining him from doing that although he felt so comfortable and warm inside. All because of the pureness of her smile.

"The sea and the sunset. The shade colors, this scent. It makes me happy." She gazed the waves again.

She was sat on the sand, the hem of her kimono was soaked, the waves were dying at her bare feet.

"Yes, it is."

"I wonder why I never noticed it before. I never have time to let myself be cherished by these small daily things. Yet, they are so big, strong and beautiful when we take heed." She said.

Aoshi thought her voice was very sweet. She had her look lost in the horizon.

Suddenly, she rose to her feet and turned herself to him.

He was handsome with the dying sunlight on his back, his shadowed face, a fierce light in his eyes. She wished he'd smile, but she'd be surely asking too much.

"Don't you feel happy sometimes, Aoshi-san?"

The orange light reflected on those blue eyes seemed to be melting the ice they bore. His look was almost warm.

"Yes, I do, Megumi."

She smiled to him.

"I feel the sea is so familiar for me. It doesn't seem I was born in Aizu. I am sorry to ask, but where were you born, Aoshi-san?"

"Edo." A short and fast answer came from his barely open lips.

"Oh..."she strived herself from another question but she could not resist. " what about your family? I say your biological family."

Aoshi lingered in silence. Megumi was already awfully sorry for having aked him about that and she'd just apologize when he said:

"They're dead. My father and mother. They were Oniwabanshuu. My father died from tuberculosis when I was no older than eight months. My mother died giving birth to me. I nave no brothers."

Aoshi showed no feelings on his cold-pitched voice. Megumi never imagined that. Sometimes it was impossible to remember he was a human being like everyone else and that he was born out of a woman. But she tried not to show she was sorry for that and she kept her smile to him.

Aoshi wanted to touch her fingers, but they were hidden into her sleeves. He didn't know what was that, but he felt a great wave of affection towards that woman standing right before his eyes. Maybe it was her happiness and her pureness that were getting to him. He searched for happiness and pureness for a long time. Happiness and pureness to tame his tormented gloomy soul. And she had them both right that moment.

She smiled more and more and walked past him, removing sand from her clothes and straightening them.

"I know we are late, let's return to the hotel."

He had downcast eyes, but she didn't see that. Aoshi breathed in, turned to her and followed her steps.

XxX

They arrived at the hotel when it was some seconds past six. Aoshi got both keys. The sheer gladness was readable on Megumi's face and it made her so beautiful. On the other hand, Aoshi's face had a shadow he managed to dismiss from the eyes of those who didn't know him.

They went up the stairs. When Megumi got to her room, she felt Aoshi's hand circling her wrist. She turned to him with widened eyes.

"Wait. I have something for you."

She could not see his eyes. His bangs were veiling them.

"Something?"

He nodded.

"It's into my room. I'll pick it up."

Aoshi followed his way to his room and Megumi opened her own door. She entered her room but she didn't close the door totally. Some seconds later, when she was in the bathroom removing the sand from her clothes, she saw Aoshi entering.

He had a package on his hands. She walked to the bedroom. Aoshi was standing by the bed.

"It's for tonight."

Intrigued, Megumi received the package and sat on the bed.

Aoshi was standing right beside her.

Her hands carefully, unwrapped his gift. She saw it was black satin.

She got the fabric on her hands and spread it on the bed. Aoshi had given her a beautiful and luxurious black satin dress. But it wasn't everything. There were high heeled western shoes for her to wear with the dress. Her eyes shone. She turned to Aoshi.

"Thank you, Aoshi-san. Thank you very much! I had brought a kimono for the party. I'd never imagine something like this dress."

"it was my slip, I am awfully sorry I didn't tell you it's an western-style party. I imagined you would not have a western dress."

Megumi slid her fingers on the fine fabric.

"It's beautiful!"

"I thought it'd match your hair."

She smiled and thanked him once again.

"Well, I'll get ready now. The party is set to seven o'clock. Unfortunately, we have less than one hour." He said.

"Don't worry, I won't delay you."

"I didn't mean this."

He walked to the door and she followed him.

"I know."

Then, she shut the door and walked to the bathroom.

She really needed another bath but this one would be really brief. After that, she gazed the luxurious black dress and slid it over her pale body. She looked on the mirror. The dress was so beautiful! But she was not able to button it! Her fingers couldn't reach! She tried hard, but it was impossible. So, she decided to set her hair. Sat by the dresser, Megumi carefully braided the front part of her hair. Then she fastened the braid on the upper part of her head and braided the whole hair. She thought it looked good. Megumi had pointed that hairstyle in one of the western girls she had seen that afternoon. Later, she put on the shoes and walked around the room for practice. It was not that difficult. She put perfume and lipstick.

A knock was heard on the door.

"Are you ready, Megumi?"

"Oh, damn, it's already Aoshi!" she thought.

She rushed to the door and self opened it. Aoshi got in.

"Almost! I can't close this dress!"

She was visibly shy but extremely beautiful.

"Let me do it." Aoshi said softly.

At first, Megumi thought on refusing but that would just delay them more. So, she got near him and turned her back to him.

Aoshi stretched his arms and started buttoning the dress from bottom to top. At each button, one piece of her white skin disappeared.

Megumi felt chills down her spine each time Aoshi's fingers would brush her skin.

When he was done with that, she turned to him so he finally got to see her under the light. She was extremely amazing. The black satin was no match for her silken black hair at all. She was too beautiful that night.

"I am a bit shy for my shoulders are naked." She said, blushing.

Her dress let her shoulders really naked and it also revealed a small part of her pale chest.

"I am sorry for that... I really didn't pay heed the shoulders would be uncovered with this dress."

"Never mind! It's only that I am not used to it."

"Shall we go?"

She nodded. Before they left the room, Aoshi took something out of his pocket.

"I forgot to put on the package."

Megumi looked and saw a necklace. It was very beautiful one, incrusted with shimmering white stones.

"May I?" Aoshi came to put it around her neck.

She pulled the hair and he placed it carefully around her fine neck.

"Thank you once again, Aoshi-san."

Aoshi just nodded and they left the room. Brilliants. Those stones were brilliants. But comparing to her eyes, they were nothing else than simple stones that envied the shine of those dark eyes.

XxX

At the lobby, Aoshi realized Megumi was drawing attention. But it didn't disturb him that much for they entered the carriage immediately.

Megumi looked at him. He was astonishing in that black tuxedo. His hair had that beautiful shine, his male features as beautiful as ever. And those eyes. What else could she say about those eyes? That night they had such a beautiful shade of blue. They were piercing through her skin and delighting her with that. She had to avoid them not to get too carried away. And for her relief, his bangs were the black veil on his eyes. His strong hands were carefully placed on his lap.

The mansion the party was held was not extremely far from the hotel. Megumi came out of the carriage, helped by Aoshi's hand. The mansion was big and it reminded her of Takeda's. For one moment, she felt so uncomfortable. Aoshi offered his arm to her and she weaved hers into his. She was breathing hard as she walked the garden. Was that a mix of fear and apprehension? That white mansion could be Takeda's... she looked to her side and she saw her captor. Shinomori Aoshi.

Her face changed completely. She had been happy but now there was only angst. Her mouth was dry and the garden was so dark. She thought of running away but the Okashira would break her arm and Takeda would beat her more. But she had to try. The door was near and the lights were blinding her.

She started sliding her arm from his while she eyed him with the corner of her eyes. That tall, ruthless man could break her arm with only a slight move. She looked behind, the gates were open. She took her arm from his in a glance but as she was turning away, she felt his cold hands around her wrist.

She growled between her teeth.

"Let go of me, Shinomori Aoshi."

She fought to release herself from his grip.

Aoshi frowned and tightened his grip.

"What's wrong, Megumi?"

"You won't take me to that bastard again. You may break my arm now, but I'll fight until the very end!"

"What bastard?" he was confused.

"Takeda! I won't be beaten again!"

Only then Aoshi released her wrist. But his hand went up to her shoulders and his face got very near hers.

"This is NOT Tokyo. This is NOT that mansion. I am NOT your captor."

Her eyes widened and the fear she held on them seemed to be dismissed by the softness and warmth of his words. Suddenly, everything changed and she felt the familiar scent of his body. She got silent, in shock. Her mouth was dry and she was panting.

"Will you protect me?" she whispered in a crying tone.

"Against anything." He mumbled, his nose almost touching the tip of hers.

She looked around and she saw herself in the garden of a mansion. A mansion different from Takeda's. And the man who was right before her didn't make her captive of that monster anymore although she felt he sometimes was her captor. He was still her captor, only in a different way now.

"I am sorry." She wiped all the fear away and behaved as if nothing had ever happened. But she couldn't deny her shame. She was ashamed of the stupid role she had just played.

Aoshi wondered she must have had something like a déjàvu or that she should be still weak from all the bad things that affected her health lately. Deliriums. Megumi stood by Aoshi's side and put her arm into his. They lingered a bit so Megumi could recompose. Still amused, he lifted his arm, crooked her hand and they went inside.

XxXx

They were received with great joy. Megumi was smiling and looking lovely to everyone. Aoshi... well, Aoshi was the same person as always. He let her alone and joined the other men. The doctor thought it was really impressive seeing Aoshi talkative in English! When did he learn that? He seemed to be doing really well.

She sat against a chair and sipped some wine. She had passed the champagne.

Her eyes were right on him. And he was amazing. His beauty was a good reason for all her enchantment. And looking around, she realized other women were looking at him too. Those looks aroused some jealousy into her. Aoshi was the youngest among the men.

In a glance, a Japanese older woman approached her and asked Megumi to join them. She followed the older lady and sat among the other women. The women were talking in different languages, laughing a lot. Megumi was apart of all of that. But they would also talk in Japanese. Frivolities only. Nevertheless, they looked very amused when they knew Megumi was a doctor.

"Really?" an American fat lady exclaimed.

"Yes." Megumi nodded.

"And that handsome gentleman? Is he your husband?" a freckled young woman asked her in a very good Japanese.

"No!" Megumi laughed and threw her head back. "We just know each other from a long time." Saying that, Megumi once again remembered when she first laid her eyes on the Okashira.

"Pardon me, but I didn't introduce. My name is Sarah Whitney." The freckled young woman said in Japanese.

Megumi bowed and the other woman found it interesting.

"My father is a businessman who moved here to Japan ten years ago."

"You really speak Japanese well." Megumi remarked.

"Thanks!" the other woman smiled. "I see you're not from Yokohama."

"I am from Tokyo."

The blue eyes of the other woman went wide. She clasped her hands together.

"Really?" I am currently living in Tokyo too!!! There's one month since I moved with my older brother."

"Yokohama is a beautiful city. I did enjoy it."

"When are you going back to Tokyo?"

"Shinomori-san and I are returning tomorrow afternoon."

The other one raised her brows.

"So his name is Shinomori..."

"Shinomori Aoshi." Megumi said in a rather annoyed way. "Excuse me." she turned around and walked to the other side of the room.

The other woman smiled innocently at her and waved, saying she'd catch her later.

There was a man playing the piano in a very beautiful and touching way. There were waiters serving appetizers and she'd sometimes chew some.

Some couples were also dancing on the ballroom. Having nobody to talk to, Megumi was forced to return to where the other women, including Sarah were. She had nothing against the woman, she seemed to be a good one, she was only jealous...

Megumi got pretty surprised when she noticed a gaijin eying her. She surely blushed and that seemed to have attracted the man.

Aoshi realized that and, instinctively, got closer to Megumi. She wondered if he had seen that. He bowed to the other women first. Their eyes shone with the presence of such a knockout.

Aoshi's eyes laid on Megumi's goblet. She blushed for she remembered she had promised not to drink again and she was right there drinking wine.

"Only tonight." she said to him.

"I didn't say anything."

She teased.

"And since have you got the need to say this? These blue eyes talk for you."

He looked around.

"Do you want to dance?"

Megumi got pretty amused.

"I don't know how to dance..."

Aoshi raised his brows.

"I can show you."

Her fine brown arched in defy.

"I didn't know you knew how to dance. This does not match with you!"

"Onmitsu life... and skills"

"Right, Okashira."

She had been calling him "Okashira" many times lately and always in a playful or teasing way.

It was all to be said. He reached out his hand and she accepted the invitation. Sarah's eyes widened with amusement. She focused on Megumi and gave her an encouragement look. He led her on the ballroom, dancing a beautiful waltz.

Megumi realized the gaijin had now a disappointed face. But she saw something, or at least she thought she had seen it. It was surprising! Aoshi's blue eyes had just stabbed the other man and the foreigner had been put at his place. Megumi laughed her fox laugh.

"What?" Aoshi asked.

"Nothing..." she said in the middle of a smile, her hand grabbing Aoshi's shoulder.

XxX

The party was pretty much the same. Megumi danced with another man, Sarah's cousin. She really didn't want to, but the guy really insisted. Aoshi was not around that moment. There was a time Megumi was alone again on the couch when Aoshi approached her. The only person she had become acquainted with was Sarah and now the woman was waltzing on the ballroom. Megumi had politely passed other men's invitations. She was looking at the starry sky and a smiled lingered on her face.

Aoshi came near her and sat.

"Enjoying the stars?"

"They are beautiful."

Megumi then ran her eyes on the room. The foreigner seemed not to have lost his hope but he was visibly intimidated by Aoshi's presence. And Aoshi knew that.

His blue eyes were trying to be far from those wine-stained lips. But somehow, it seemed quite difficult.

"Would you mind going back now? I have things to do tomorrow morning."

"No." she rose to her feet and he understood they could already return to the hotel.

Aoshi said farewell to his acquaintances and Megumi smiled to everybody. Sarah gave her a small piece of paper with her address so Megumi could visit her and talk if she wanted to.

The way on the carriage was pretty silent. They entered the hotel and went up the stairs.

"I hope it didn't bother you." Aoshi said by the door of her room.

"No, it didn't. I really had fun."

"And fans..." he said in a very uninterested voice, it was almost a whisper.

Megumi remembered Aoshi's look to the foreigner. She smiled and unlocked the door.

"Aoshi-san..."

"Yes..."

She had that suggestive smile on her lips.

"I saw your look to that foreigner tonight."

Megumi expected Aoshi's reaction but it didn't come. He was as emotionless as before. She got a bit frustrated by that. He didn't accept her teasing.

But suddenly, his hand was placed right under her chin, lifting it and making her dark brown eyes meet his vast blue ones. He parted his lips to speak.

"It was because I wanted to show everybody, woman, that at least tonight, you were mine."

His words made her heart jump. She breathed in and felt the faint warmth of his breath. Megumi closed her eyes and opened it again. But his blue eyes were not on hers anymore. He had walked to his room.

"Good night, Megumi."

XxXxXx

Looooooooong chapter... long authoress note.

Hum... a note on Aoshi's hairstyle that shocked Megumi: it was just like he first appeared on the manga, his bangs are parted and combed behind... picture it?

And about Aoshi's past. We don't have a clue, right? So, if we want something, we just have to make up everything. That's what I did...

I almost wrote the scene in which Megumi would tell Aoshi about the baby now. I had pictured it during the beach scene, I thought it was so cute. But I decided to let it be for I got some other plans for it and continued the chapter. If such revelation had been made now, the chapter would have turned out completely different and so would the story. Be a bit more patient because something nice is going to happen! (evil laughs...)

I had to go through some research to write this chapter but it was so nice! First, I had to discover the distance between Tokyo and Yokohama by the end of the Nineteenth century. I asked a Japanese exchange student who is here in my city now and is my younger sister's friend and she told me she didn't know... then I researched a lot on internet and found it! The railroad built on the early days of Meiji Era was 29 km length and it connected Tokyo and Yokohama. But I had another problem. What was the speed of the trains that time? The closer I could get was that on 1860, there was a train that could go 15 mph. So, I decided to adopt this one into my story and I made the calculation for the time of the trip. I took the average speed as 12mph and it goes less than two hours of trip. If it's wrong, don't blame me for that since I didn't find anything and did things on my own. Then, I read A LOT on Yokohama. The cuisine part was really nice. The restaurant I described really exists even nowadays. It started on 1872 and remains there. Its name is Wakana and their specialty is really this broiled eel, for this poor authoress' sadness (I am vegetarian...). I was striving this carnivore situation... but I had to give in on this chapter... --

This poor writer is also addicted in reading Aoshi/Megumi fics the whole day. Worse. I print them so I can take them to college, to the doctor, or when I travel to Poções (the city I work at.). I spent a box of paper printing Another Chance by Eriesalia just to name one out of the many I've printed till now... and I LOVE to read the reviews... I also print them... and it lets me sad because my story is not good enough to attract reviews... but I am not complaining... maybe it's just too long and people fell uninterested and lazy to read all of those... but I guess they just can get scared off by the beginning of this fanfiction, which was sooo poor. It's just that I'd love to write long author's notes thanking everybody. Let me fantasize! Well, Leila, this one is surely for you!!!!


	29. The Beauty And the Beast

Chapter XXIX – The Beauty And The Beast

I don't own Rurouni Kenshin characters, ok? (Although I wish to death I could own Aoshi…) I am not making money with them. And you already know all the craziness and the works…

OBS: The sentences into quotation marks refer to the characters speech. (You also know this, right???? Larissa no baka! /shakes the head in disapproval.)

XxXxXxXx

Megumi got pretty puzzled that Aoshi had entered his room and left her standing at her doorway. When she heard his door being shut, she seemed to have been woken up from a bad dream. Her eyes were focused on his door and her lips were parted. In shock.

She automatically opened her bedroom door and went inside. She walked to the bed, her mind seemed to have gone blank. She sat on the mattress and looked through the window. The sky was pretty starry. Silver points on the navy blue background.

"What was that on the hallway?" she thought and spoke loudly.

Megumi took her shoes off. Her feet were pretty tired and her calves hurt. She opened her bag and got a fresh balsam from inside her small medicine box. Gently, she massaged her legs and feet with it and felt really relieved.

After this, she saw her face reflected on the large mirror.

It looked like a frame. A pale woman dressed in black, sat on a luxurious bed. She tried to hear any noise that would come from his bedroom, but it was impossible. She left the bed and walked to the wall. She placed her hands and leaned her body against it as if eavesdropping. But there was only silence, as always.

"Maybe he's already sleeping."

Rather impossible. Aoshi is not that kind of person that falls asleep in a glance.

There were many things on her mind and thoughts were coming and going while she kept her body there against the cold brick wall, hearing his silence. Alluring, taunting embrace of pure silence.

_Clawing up my eyes_

_I'm feeling your arms around me_

_On the other side_

_It's time to go_

_I'm hearing your voice_

_without words_

_On the other side_

She returned to the mirror and examined herself carefully. She had to do something. She took off the necklace and placed it on the bed.

With bare feet, dressed in black, Megumi approached the door. She opened it avoiding much noise and closed it carefully. Her heart was pumping at each step. The lights on the hallway were very weak and the whole hotel was very silent. She stood in front of Aoshi's door. Slowly, she lifted her hand to knock on the door. She was breathing in and out heavily.

But she curled her fingers and hesitated. It seemed to have taken a lifetime but in fact, she lingered there for less than one minute. She turned her back to go away when she heard his voice right behind her back.

"Megumi."

She froze….

"Oh, it's nothing, I …" she gasped and tried to explain herself, her back turned to him.

"I sensed your presence."

She was blushing and her voice was grounded on her throat. Her hands had nervous cold fingers and she didn't know what to do with them.

Aoshi was motionless on the doorway.

"I am sorry if I woke you up, Aoshi-san." She cleared her throat.

"No, you didn't." it was a quick rasp.

Only then, she dared to turn around and face him. He was dressing a black yukata and his figure was shadowed by the fading light.

"But you were going to sleep."

"Perhaps." His voice seemed to come from miles away.

He looked at her and she felt her body tremble.

Megumi was breathing in. She had made her mind.

"Aoshi-san…" she came near him.

He just raised his eyebrows and she thought it was really torture to see those eyes like that.

"I remember you said something to me before entering your room."

Aoshi realized she had her eyes roaming, lost on the hallway. In fact, she was searching anything to avoid looking at him.

He raised his eyebrows.

"Yes…"

And then there was a long cutting silence again. Megumi was standing outside and Aoshi was by the door. Their breaths couldn't almost be heard.

She decided to break the silence at once.

" You… you wanted to… show everybody…"

"That you were mine tonight." He completed her sentence before her.

Megumi raised her eyes and looked at him. He had one hand on the threshold, he was almost leaning against it. His bangs failed in veiling the amazing blue light coming from his eyes. His mouth was plain and his features were stoic.

She blushed.

"Yes…"

Her fingers looked for each other and she started squeezing and twisting them behind her back.

Aoshi's eyes were scanning her, examining each molecule of oxygen that could come out of her lungs, each fast move her eyes made.

"But… there is someone…"

She stopped and breathed in. Aoshi was visibly waiting for her to complete her sentence.

"You showed everybody but someone."

Her heart was beating so fast that it hurt. Her mouth was dry and her hands were as cold as the ice blue eyes of the handsome man standing right in front of her.

"And who would this 'someone' be?"

He could hear her heartbeats, she knew it. And she couldn't picture anything from him. Once again she was there, like she did two years ago. But now she had nothing to lose anymore. She had lost it all.

"Stupid Megumi, stupid woman!!!" her inner self was screaming so loud she was feeling dizzy.

Aoshi still waited for an answer. Her hands started shaking almost violently. But her old flirtatious personality just came out the last second and she simply said.

"Me…"

There was an outburst of inner screams and curses inside of her. She knew it was wrong. She mentally slapped and stabbed herself. The other part of her just laughed her kitsune laugh.

She looked to both sides, there was no sound. Her room was right there, she quickly moved to start running after teasing so bad when she saw that Aoshi moved faster than her and dragged her in his own room.

She got scared and tried to fight. Aoshi pressed her body between the shut door and his own body. She was afraid and he saw it on her eyes. Was it like this he once stalked his victims? Surprising them with his amazing speed? Not even her good kitsune days could have predicted it.

"Are you afraid?" he softly asked.

"A-afraid?"

"Yes… afraid of me?"

Megumi shook her head vehemently. Her lips were very closed. Her wrists laid beneath his strong hands.

His eyes went right on hers. Aoshi's hand came and touched the soft skin of her face. Feeling the warmth of his touch, she felt ease.

His head came down slowly to meet hers. His other hand went right on her nape, his fingers were now entangled on the braids she hadn't untied.

Megumi's mouth was dry and she knew her remedy was those moist lips coming to hers.

Her eyelids were half closed. His eyes were open and piercing. He brushed his lips on hers, his gaze fixed on her dark eyes. There was something going on those blue eyes. Aoshi tightened the grip on her nape and he parted his lips. His body was pressing hers firmly. Megumi felt the tip of his tongue on the corner of her mouth. Aoshi was stalking her. He was testing her, trying to find out when she'd give up. And both of them knew she couldn't resist much. She couldn't resist more to that kiss. He was sending shivers down her spine. She was nothing but an easy prey for him; she had been caught off-guard on her own game. Megumi finally parted her lips and his tongue slid between them, longing for hers. Both had eyes closed now. Her hands came up and held him the tightest she could, pressing his broad chest against hers. And the kiss was long and furious.

It was Aoshi who took his lips from hers. He looked at Megumi. Her kiss-swollen lips were parted and her eyes were closed. She was almost panting. She was still feeling his fingers on her braided hair and the heat of his body right there, pressing her against the door. But he was there no more. She opened her eyes, her hand on her chest. Aoshi was standing some feet away, his arms were along his body, his yukata a bit out of place because of her tight hug.

"I…" she was trying to find out the words to say something but they seemed to have ran away from her mouth. In fact, they had given place to the nice taste of his.

Megumi bit her lower lip. The scent of his body was on her nostrils. She was falling again into that damned bewitchment.

"We can't stay like this, Aoshi."

He pointed out she had dropped the title.

Aoshi went to the bed and sat on the mattress.

"And what do you suggest, Takani-sensei?"

She walked to him, her bare feet brushing the tapestry. Megumi untied her braids and her beautiful hair cascaded down her shoulders. Her body trembled. Her heart hurt. Her mind fought.

"I suggest we say farewell."

He raised his eyes to look at her.

"Forever?"

She nodded. Getting closer to her, he stood up and encircled her body. She threw her head back and he got his lips very close to her neck.

"Now, I must ask you something for it's our farewell." She said slowly and in an extremely low voice his onmitsu skills ears could hear pretty well.

"Ask."

"Pretend you were also mine at least tonight." Her voice was faltering.

It was very easy to find the way to her rosy lips. Megumi slid her hands into his hair, messing it completely.

"What else do you want from me?" he whispered among kisses.

It took some seconds until her brain had compiled the unexpected words he spoke for everything was crazy and she could barely breathe…

"Nothing. Only you the way I asked tonight." her voice was husky and sensual and her eyes had a fiery light into them.

Deliberately, Aoshi's fingers worked on unbuttoning her dress. It became loose and soon the black satin was rustling on the floor. She was quiet, looking down, being undressed as a bride on her honeymoon.

Megumi felt her heart heavy to know it'd be the last time they would ever touch each other. It'd be the last time she'd look into those blue eyes that way. But she was happy she was with him. She didn't know exactly how to act. His blue eyes were there, intense, right before her warm brown ones. It was her wish that moment wouldn't fade fast into the past. She grabbed hold of his neck as if she would drown at any moment and he was the only thing that could save her life.

_Oh no,_

_here it is again_

_I need to know_

_when I will fall in decay_

…

_Dolefully desired_

_Destiny of a lie_

_Set me free, your heaven's a lie._

_Set me free with your love._

_Set me free._

Later on, she lied by his side and she felt like crying when she gazed his ice blue eyes. The fading light seemed to make them less icy than usual. She smiled to him. She knew he wouldn't smile back. Her eyes got teary suddenly and she didn't want him to see that. Instinctively, she closed her eyes and moved back, making his hand fall on the mattress. She had given her back to him.

Megumi breathed deeper and gathered strength and courage to leave before she'd fall asleep. She put the sheets aside and sat on the bed.

"Where are you going?" Aoshi asked while she was picking up her dress.

She turned to him, her smile was pale, her long black hair was hiding most of her face. The white skin of her body was livid and attracting the fading light from the lamp. She got his yukata and handed it to him.

"Dress up, it's a chilly night." She didn't look at him.

He did as she said and stood up, blocking her way. She looked at him pretty puzzled.

"Why are you blocking my way? It's over, you don't need to fake it anymore." She hadn't found the strength or courage to look at his face.

_Set me free._

Aoshi stretched his hand to his bag and drew a clean yukata from it. Carefully, he turned to her and placed the yukata around her shoulders.

"Dress it, it's a chilly night." He said in the same tone she had talked to him before.

"What's this, Shinomori-san?"

He was serious.

"Don't call me like this. We don't need such formality now."

Megumi got amused by the deep tone of his voice. He tied his yukata around her waist. After all, he had to dress her with it. It was very large.

He cupped her face between his hands and lifted it. And he looked deeply into her eyes. She was taken aback by that situation.

"I am returning to my room. Excuse me." Megumi pulled her face from his hands and made her eyes downcast.

She made mention to go past him.

Aoshi held her wrist tightly. His look was freezing blue but deep and overtaking at the same time.

"_Please don't leave me now _

_Hear me, stay a little longer_."

Aoshi's words reached her ears and she felt the world was going insane.

"Excuse me? Don't toy with me." her look was completely puzzled, she was frowning a lot. One could tell she was even angry.

_Oh, no, here it is again_

…

_Your heaven's a lie._

His features, on the other hand, were extremely pure.

"I asked you to stay. For tonight. Please."

It didn't seem he was just toying. For an unknown reason, he was asking her to stay. It was too much for just one night. When on Earth would she imagine he would _please _ask her to stay? Megumi allowed Aoshi to take her back to his bed. They lied there and he just eyed her, like if he were trying to fuse their looks and go into her mind. But her mind was blank. There was only that blue light she could look at to both be frozen and delighted.

She was ashamed but she was also very tired so it was not that hard for her to fall asleep after half hour of complete silence.

Aoshi got near her and threw an arm over her body. His look was focused on her yet. His eyes were registering each fine trace of her face, his nostrils were trying to keep the nice smell of her body. His fingers tried to keep the sensation of touching her soft skin.

His lips parted and he mumbled into her dreams.

"I didn't need to fake it, Megumi."

And then, he closed his eyes and fell asleep, feeling the warmth of her body go through the fabric of his yukata.

XxXx

They broke into it without any noise. Nobody realized them at all. They silenced the weak scream.

The light at Aoshi's room had already faded. Megumi was asleep right beside him. He was also sleeping, his body right behind hers. He had allowed himself to embrace her body. For the last time, as she had already told him. The beige blanket covered half of his body and almost all Megumi's figure.

Suddenly, Aoshi's blue eyes opened and narrowed. He was frowning. His head turned to both sides of the room, his eyes scanning into darkness. He had sensed them. Carefully, he took his arm from under Megumi's body and sat on the bed. His hands reached out for the lamp and he lit it. The room was exactly the same yet. But they were getting near.

Aoshi looked at the pale woman by his side. He had to wake her up. Bowing to get to her ear, he called her name.

"Megumi. Wake up."

It was always hard to make her wake up. She was a heavy sleeper, right his opposite.

He could guess what was about to happen and she couldn't be there. Strangely enough, he felt his blood running cold, his heartbeats were not in a faster pace as everyone could expect. He felt that cold sensation once again.

As she wouldn't wake up, Aoshi went for her and tried to get her in his arms. He'd carry her to her room and let her there. But he knew he wouldn't have time.

So, the bedroom door cracked open. Four men came from the hallway and peered inside. They were all in dark clothes, carrying unsheathed swords. They saw a body lying on the bed. Aoshi was hidden on the bed curtains.

"I am sorry I couldn't wait for you in dreams, as you wished." Aoshi's cold voice spoke.

The four men got startled. Immediately, one of them threw himself against the bed, his sword in the air.

"Aaaaaaaaaaah!"

Aoshi easily dodged. The sword hit the mattress, few inches away from Megumi.

Feeling something fall heavily on the bed, Megumi opened her eyes. Her heart was pumping, she was scared.

"Aoshi-san, what's…" she didn't have time to complete her sentence. As she was turning around to see what was going on in the bedroom, she saw a shadow fly across the mattress, grab hold of her body and speed out of the bed to the other side of the room.

She screamed. The person who had gotten her was now standing near the window. She was also standing. She felt and recognized that smell. It was Aoshi. His left arm was firmly holding her against his chest.

Megumi looked at his face. He was not looking at her, he had his gaze fixed forward, but she couldn't see his eyes. She only knew he was frowning. The dresser was right beside them and over the dresser there was his kodachis' sheath. Only then Megumi looked forward. She saw four men dressed in black, teeth gritted, swords being wielded. She guessed it could only be a strike against Aoshi.

She lifted her hand and grabbed his yukata. He didn't look at her. His eyes were measuring the distance between his right arm and his kodachis. The other men were standing still either waiting for Aoshi's move or thinking how to attack next.

In a second, Megumi felt Aoshi's body was not there to support her anymore, she started to fall but for her surprise, he came back so fast that he could stop her body from hitting the wall. Two of the men came in their direction then. In a quick move, she felt his hand let go of her and a tall shadow walled her figure

Aoshi was now holding his twin blades. Megumi was placed somewhat behind him, like if he were her shield. Her eyes went to check his face and she felt her own blood freeze. She got horrified by Aoshi's cold expression, by that dreadful look. She was sure the men had felt the same, they were coming less powerful, she could point a drop of sweat rolling on the forehead of one of them. Her heart was so heavy, so heavy. She didn't know if she feared Aoshi or the men the most. World was going around and around, her head was hurting. She wanted to scream, she wanted to go away. The expression on those blue eyes was deadly. _Shura._

Without stepping forward, Aoshi wielded one of his kodachi and cut one of the men across the chest. The man stumbled in agony and fell on a table, knocking it and breaking the fine porcelain pots that laid over it. Megumi closed her eyes the most she could and hid her face from that scene. She was now totally hidden behind Aoshi's tall figure. She was almost going into the brick wall and she'd have done it if it were possible. Fear was almost driving her crazy and she didn't know what to do anymore. She didn't want to open her eyes. Her head started throbbing violently. Shinomori Aoshi was evil.

Kanryuu. Shinomori was there to take her back once again. She was breathing heavily, panting, her hands wrapped around her head. She was living that hell again. She'd never be in peace, they would always come after her.

Aoshi glanced behind and saw Megumi was safe behind him. One man lied lifeless on the floor. The other one had been hit on the arm and was bleeding a lot. The other two men remained in the same initial position.

One of them finally spoke. He was taller and older.

"Come, Shinomori. We're waiting for your strike."

But Aoshi didn't move. He knew that if he moved, Megumi would be out of protection. He had to fight them from that same position, at the very corner of the room. There was not much space left, but he was able to deal well with it and win that one. Although Megumi was not the target, he knew men like these didn't mind killing innocent people at their own sake.

As Megumi was behind him, he had both hands free and he could now use his twin kodachis perfectly if it were not for the lack of space for both of arms to move properly.

"I am the target, aren't I?" Aoshi spoke. "So, come and beat me if you can."

One of the unwounded men came to him. Once again, Aoshi used his kodachi and although this one was a better opponent, he managed to knock him out without getting out of place. The second man lied also lifeless now, his throat had been cut. A squirt of blood hit the wall and dirtied in crimson red the beautifully rich peach-color wallpaper.

The last man, probably the chief, smirked.

"Move, Shinomori."

Aoshi didn't reply. The man had noticed he hadn't moved on his attacks. He was trying to shield Megumi. She'd be no match to someone bearing a weapon since she didn't know how to fight or protect herself. The other one, with one wounded arm, ran to the chief and got his sword back.

"And now Hanumo-san?" the wounded man asked in a whisper. But Aoshi could hear it well because of his keen senses.

"We'll get him. He will not move, Masamu." The answer the chief gave was even lower.

The chief turned to Aoshi and spoke once again.

"You won't move, Shinomori… and let yourself be an easy target…"

"You're not worthy of my skilled techniques, Hanumo-san."

The chief got impressed Aoshi knew his name.

"We all know of your strength, Shinomori. It's going to be my glory and a shame for you. You're going to be slain right there, without attacking…"

The man paused, laughed as if he were insane and almost screamed:

"All because of that whore."

Listening to those words, Megumi opened her eyes and saw the blood on the wall. She freaked out. Aoshi was holding both kodachis and there was also blood on the blades. His semblance was terrorizing. _Shura, shura, shura._ She'd be one of his victims. She didn't want to be one of his victims. The man was too cruel and too cold. Kanryuu was right there calling her "whore" once again. She felt feverish. Megumi examined the room and saw there was a way she could get out. The bedroom door was open. Shinomori was not paying total attention to her, she could manage to escape. She breathed in and rose to her feet.

One.

Two.

Three.

Aoshi saw Megumi's body move forward and run towards the door. His eyes widened and he tried to reach her, but the man with the wounded arm got her and held her yukata. She fell and screamed. Aoshi got furious and moved ahead. His two kodachis dangerously pointed to the wounded man. Megumi struggled to get out from his grip and she hit his wounded arm. With pain, the man released her and Aoshi stabbed him on the neck.

But Megumi was out of her senses and she was crying a lot, crawling, raising her body and trying to run to the door and go away. She was so desperate she hadn't realized there was the last man, the chief standing on the shadows, near the door.

Aoshi saw the man was smirking and that he had pulled something out of his clothes. Aoshi saw what that was. A gun. And he pointed that to Megumi.

"MEGUMI!"

Aoshi screamed. There was such a long time he didn't scream like that that he felt his throat itch. But she didn't turn to him, she just ran in panic. Aoshi moved as fast as he could. There was the man, Megumi and himself almost in a line.

There was a shot.

Megumi screamed. There was a silver blade going up the other man's torso. Megumi fell to her knees. Blood flew and tinted her face in red, her hands had also got stained. Her black eyes were extremely wide open but she couldn't see anything. And there was someone knelt in the shadows, partially beside her. Desperately, Megumi rubbed her eyes, trying to see something around. She took her hands from her eyes and saw the dead man's face in agony, right in front of her. She sobbed and panted, her hands were shaking and she could not see well. She was shaking too much, there was a sharp pain on her back, her body was getting dormant. She had been pushed to the floor. The man in front of her eyes had his body ripped from his stomach to his chin, in a very deep cut. A kodachi was fallen right beside him, the cutting edge turned to the man. Blood was dirtying the fine tapestry and getting to her knees, soaking the yukata she was wearing. Aoshi's yukata.

"Aoshi!"

The fear was gone and the haunting memories and visions from her past had just vanished. She didn't mind for her previous captor, Shinomori. He was now just Shinomori Aoshi, someone she loved, someone who was not under Kanryuu's demands. Her heart seemed to have come to her mouth. Her eyes focused on someone standing half in front of her, half beside her. It was Aoshi. His head was bowed, his black hair covering his side profile. On the weak light, Megumi could see his other kodachi was also on the floor, right near him, by his knees. He was kneeling, she couldn't see much more, her vision was blurry. But something caught Megumi's attention. His left hand was holding his stretched right arm firmly. Going down, she saw blood dropping from his stretched fingers.

She had tears on her eyes. Blood smell was strong.

"Aoshi!" she whispered. "Aoshi, Aoshi!" her voice got louder and louder. Warm and thick teardrops ran down her cheeks, she tried to reach out her hands to him. "A-o-shi…"

For her comfort, he turned his face to her and looked right into her eyes. His semblance didn't show her any pain, except for a very slightly furrowed brow. His blue eyes were veiled by his bangs but she could realize its shine in the dark. _Shura was no more._ He didn't let go of his right arm. When he spoke, his voice was very very deep and calm.

"Are you fine, Megumi?"

She gathered strength and answered. Her headache was also gone. The Kanryuu nightmare had been dismissed.

"Yes…" her bloodied fingers wiped the trail of tears on her face, mixing them with the blood.

Looking around, she could not just believe that scene. Megumi recovered strength and rose to her feet, avoiding the dead man right before her. Aoshi's lent yukata was soaked with blood. She walked to Aoshi and knelt before him.

"And you? Are you ok?"

His face was livid but she knew there was something wrong.

"Yes, I am. That bastard is dead, I suppose."

Megumi felt a shadow pass across her face.

"Yes, he is."

She lingered her look on Aoshi's arm and saw he was wounded. Her heart jumped.

"Oh, Kami, you got wounded."

"It's nothing." He took his arm from her sight. "I've been much worse before."

But Megumi reached out her hand and held his right wrist. She realized he sighed slightly. Getting closer, she saw there was a whole on the fabric of his yukata. He had been shot on the arm.

"Oh, my god, Aoshi! You've been shot!"

He moved his head in a way that his bangs were thrown backwards.

"It's nothing, really."

Megumi heard fast steps on the hallway. She felt her back hurt when she turned her head to look at who was coming.

"What am I going to do if more of these men are coming?" she cried.

Aoshi shook his head.

"These ones to come are not such men. Go to your room, Megumi."

Megumi guessed he must have felt their ki.

"Why?" she tried to look into his eyes, but they were closed.

"Just go. Take your dress. Go fast."

Megumi saw her satin dress was very near. She reached out her hand and got it. She left the room and hurried into hers. When she had just closed the door, she heard people turning the corner and passing through her bedroom door. She lit the lights brightly and there was an image reflected on the mirror.

Only then she understood Aoshi's request. The yukata she was wearing was not hers, it was a male yukata, Aoshi's yukata and everybody would have realized that. Furthermore, it was soaked in blood. She walked calmly to the big mirror and touched it. Her hands were bloodied, her face was also bloodied. She felt dirty and unease. Suddenly, she started crying and sobbing. That blood was not for healing purposes. It meant death. And she remembered the scenes she had just seen; she cried more, remembering the violence, the fear and the tension. She'd never want to see that again. Never again. Never ever again…

In no time, his door was slammed against the wall and there were three people with lanterns on their hands.

"Shinomori-san!!!"

The bedroom got bright in one second.

The hotel manager, the counterman and another man Aoshi had never seen around the hotel were there into his room. When Aoshi looked up at their faces, he saw they were shocked.

The bedroom was an entire mess. The bedclothes were torn, the furniture was thrown all around and some were broken, the decorations were also into pieces. The fine tapestry was soaked in blood, the wallpaper had thick stains of blood. But the most disturbing things were the four corpses. Each one at one point of the big room.

"Shi-Shinomori-san…"the manager was totally aghast. "What did happen in here?"

"An attack." Aoshi answered quickly.

The three men were still by the door. They didn't seem to have the courage to step in.

"Mori." The manager addressed to the unknown man. "Check the hotel to see if someone has any clue of what just took place." The other man dispatched immediately.

Aoshi slowly stood up. He stretched his yukata with only one arm, the other was hanging motionless at his side.

Realizing that, the manager stepped in, taking care not to look to the floor.

"You got hurt, Shinomori-san."

Aoshi went to the bed and sat on the mattress.

"You don't need to worry."

XxX

Megumi was already clean. She had heard the voices coming from Aoshi's room. He was hurt. She knew she should go there and help him. But she was afraid, she was shocked, she was terrorized.

"I don't know what to think of… him…" she thought as she glanced the bloodied water on a bowl nearby.

Gracefully, although in great shock, Megumi passed her hands over her fine dark hair and made it cascade over her shoulders. Tears could come to her eyes again but she decided to fight them hard. As hard as they had always struggled to come out when she was at that damned mansion. But she won over them many times. Over Takeda. Over Shinomori. And she'd do that again.

Megumi glared her pale figure reflected on the mirror. She was wearing a beige standard kimono, socks and the typical sandals. It was also a good idea to tie her long hair. She did it.

With determination, the pale figure rose and her hand caught a black box that had been laid over the dresser.

When she crossed the threshold, Megumi saw there were some people on the hallway. Their faces had mortified expressions, their mouths seemed to have gone crisp, some were pale. There were about six people outside. When the imposing woman doctor emerged, they all looked at her and stopped talking. But she couldn't help listening to an employee referring to Aoshi as a "beast, although he is really charming".

Megumi looked down the other woman and made her understand she had heard her petty remark. She walked to Aoshi's door and opened it.

Once again, everybody in the room looked behind to see who was coming in. Megumi realized the confused looks on their faces. There were Aoshi, the manager and the counterman inside. The manager quickly came to her.

"Takani-san, I understand you must be worried but this is no vision suitable for a woman."

Megumi felt like slapping the man. But she didn't. She kept her cold look and ran her eyes away from the battlefield scene. Her dark brown eyes fixed on Aoshi's tall figure sat on the bed. The manager surely thought she was just a frail beauty.

Being passed by Megumi, the manager trailed her once again.

"We'll take Shinomori-san to the hospital in no time, don't worry about your friend, Takani-san."

Hearing these words, Aoshi opened his eyes and focused them on Megumi.

"There's no need to go to a hospital. Takani-sensei is the best doctor I know. She can do enough for me, if it's her will."

Megumi was now standing halfway to Aoshi. She nodded in agreement. Turning her head to the manager, who was exasperated right beside her, she spoke.

" I see Shinomori-san has been shot. I want hot water and extremely clean towels."

The manager had a puzzled look. He didn't know what to do. It was obvious the best choice was to take Shinomori Aoshi to the hospital. But the very man had asked for Takani-sensei's help. A woman doctor could not do much!

"Shinomori-san…"

Aoshi's voice could send shivers down people's spine. He had realized the motive of the man's hesitation.

"Get what Takani-sensei needs."

Not being able to argue, the manager opened the door and asked one of his janitors to bring up hot water and clean towels.

"I also need to take Shinomori-san to a clean and peaceful room where I can examine him." Megumi imperatively said.

The manager sighed.

"Right, Takani-sensei. Would you please follow me? Can you walk, Shinomori-san?"

Megumi would open her mouth in protest that Aoshi could not move or walk, that he was bleeding and it would cause him harm but she didn't have time. When she reopened her eyes from blinking, Aoshi was already on the doorway, his right arm wrapped in a towel. She sighed at Aoshi's stubbornness and followed them out of the room. Once again, she didn't look around, her eyes when not on Aoshi, they were just focused on the ceiling for it was the only spot free from blood and destruction.

When Aoshi came out of the room, the hotel employees that were outside feared him much and some of them ran away. But Aoshi was pretty used to that kind of reaction towards him.

The three of them walked to the end of the hallway, four rooms ahead of Megumi's. The manager got a key ring out of his robe pocket and unlocked the door. The bedroom was pretty much the same of the other two. Stepping aside, the manager let the way free to Aoshi and Megumi. The tall man dressed in black sat on the bed and Megumi followed him. There was a small round table by the bed and she placed her medicine box over it.

Aoshi looked to the bedroom door and saw the manager was still standing there. He promptly understood Aoshi was dismissing him with that look.

"The hot water and the towels are just coming. Excuse me."

Before the man could leave, Megumi spoke gently.

"When Shinomori-san's room is not that messy, call me. I'd like to go there and pick up some clean clothes for him."

"Yes, Takani-sensei."

The manager was about to close the door but he turned and opened it again.

"Excuse me" his voice was rather tremble. "The water and the towels you asked are here, Takani-sensei."

Megumi was very busy, bowed over the side table, gathering things from inside her medicine box.

"Please, bring them here and place them over that other table." She distractedly pointed another table in the middle of the room.

The man entered and placed things just like Megumi said. Then, he walked to the door and left.

Aoshi's eyes narrowed at the door's direction. He could feel they were left alone on that part of the building. The other guests should have been hovering over what happened into his room. He turned his head to look at Megumi. She was taking many bottles from inside her medicine box, reading its labels to certify they were the right ones and placing them carefully over the table.

"You can go, Megumi."

She got startled by his statement. Immediately, she turned her head to him and shot him with a puzzled look.

"What?"

"You can leave now." he repeated in the same calm and cool voice.

Her hands slipped away from one blue glass bottle and hit the table. Her eyes lowered and she fixed them on a wooden knot.

"Why this? I'll take care of your wound. I am here for this."

"It's not really needed." He sat more comfortably on the mattress. " I can handle it."

She frowned. He was just being like old Shinomori Aoshi again. His arm was bleeding like hell and he was just talking nonsense. For one moment, it seemed she had been frozen.

He continued.

"I apologize for forcing you into that scene, for making your eyes see death. It really doesn't match with you."

"Why are you telling me this, Aoshi-san?" her voice was low and vague as if it were coming from the other side of the room.

"Simply because you don't need to do it. I saw your fear. I smelled and sensed your fear."

She stood up and came to him. Her hands were placed on his shoulder and she gently put him down on the bed.

"Excuse me." she said in a very cold way. Her eyes bore sadness and shock. That Aoshi could tell.

Her hands came to the knot of his yukata and undid it.

She was feeling nauseous again. It was the smell of blood.

"Don't do it, Megumi." He placed his left hand over hers.

Quickly and roughly, she pulled them from under his and opened his yukata, making it slide. She realized it had made his body stiffen.

"Pain? I will at least take a look at this."

She was speaking like a doctor. She was no longer the Takani Megumi he was used to. Aoshi decided to let her do what she wanted and he didn't restrain any move of hers anymore. He just lied quietly on the bed as she had made him do. His arm was bleeding, hurting and throbbing but it was really something he could handle easily.

When his right arm got unveiled from under his yukata dark fabric, Megumi's eyes widened. There was a hole on it, very blooded. Carefully, she suspended his arm to take a look on the other side and for her surprise, the bullet that reached it had remained in.

"Can you move your fingers, Aoshi-san?" she quickly raised her eyes to his face.

He frowned slightly.

"Yes." His voice was barely heard.

Megumi sighed in relief. At least he could move his fingers, it hadn't damaged his movements. The doctor promptly rose to her feet and pushed the table with water and clean towels to the side of the bed. Her delicate fingers sought for clean gauze inside her medicine chest. After finding it, she drenched it with a water-like medicine and took it to his arm.

Aoshi felt the wound stinging. He gritted his teeth. It started to bleed more.

"Aoshi-san, I'll have to perform a small surgery to remove this bullet from inside your arm. If you allow me to do such, of course."

She waited for his answer. But he lingered. His blue eyes closed and opened a couple of times. His mouth didn't move. Megumi was apprehensive. Then, he moved his head and nodded to her.

"Do whatever is necessary, sensei."

Megumi once again turned around and took a syringe and a hypodermic needle from inside her box. Aoshi eyed her carefully. She inserted the point of the needle into one tiny glass and turned to him.

"This will help you with the pain. It's morphine."

A shadow came on Aoshi's face. Morphine. Knowledge from her opium times, perhaps… but he knew it had been largely used as a painkiller in the Western countries. He nodded.

The doctor calmly took his other arm and inserted the needle under his skin.

"You may even fall asleep." She said in a cold unusual way.

Aoshi just followed her moves with his eyes. He was not afraid because he knew she was an excellent doctor. But he was feeling unsettled for he made her go through such a scene some minutes ago. And now she was different. Most probably she was in shock.

Megumi took her time cleaning the wound, trying to make the blood loss stop. It was also the time she needed for the morphine to react on his body.

Aoshi didn't feel when she cut his arm. Her eyes had a cold but precise look. Strangely enough, he felt like talking but he knew he shouldn't disturb the doctor. But words seemed to come to his mouth incessantly.

"You saw me into past. I am just a killer in your and those people's eyes. Not that I mind their opinion…"

Her hands stopped working and her eyes went to his face.

"You were just defending yourself." She said dryly.

Although he wanted to talk, and that was extremely rare, he thought it was better staying quiet.

She worked skillfully on his arm. Yet, the surgery took much more than one hour. During that time, people had come to the door but they didn't dare to knock or enter. Aoshi probably knew who they were for his eyes had widened and narrowed when they approached. Almost at the end, when nobody came for fifteen minutes, she noticed there were some minutes his eyes had been closed and his breath was extremely calm. She'd just stitch his open wound now, the bullet was already out. Megumi bit her lip. If he were sleeping, would he strike if she touched him? Would he strike if she called his name? She remembered of those eyes. _Shura_. When he was woken up and stroke, he also had a strange light in this eyes.

She reached out her hand to slightly touch him when he suddenly opened his eyes. She stepped back, totally startled.

Aoshi realized her fear.

"I won't strike."

She sighed and approached him.

"I am almost done, the bullet is already out."

"Good."

In a very unsettled way, Megumi came near him once again and started sewing his wound carefully. In a couple of minutes, she tossed away, cleaned and washed her things and set them back in the medicine box.

"It's over." She sighed.

Aoshi opened his eyes.

"I'll check if I can already take clean clothes for you at your room, Aoshi-san." In fact, she was pretty surprised by the man's resistance. He didn't fall asleep with the morphine and he wasn't drowsy at all. It seemed the only effect it had produced on his body was to take off his pain.

He didn't say anything and she really didn't need his consent.

Megumi grabbed the medicine box and walked to the door. There were people at the other side of the hallway. The manager and another man came to her hastily. She instantly recognized the taller man dressed in a western suit.

"Takani-sensei." The taller man bowed.

"Nakato-san." She also bowed. "Shinomori-san is well. I'm done with him. If you need to talk to him and can't wait for that, it's fine if you go there now. He's under painkiller effects and he needs to rest, so, I'd ask you not to take long for tonight."

Nakato nodded and walked past her to the room Aoshi was currently in. The manager continued with Megumi. She saw he had a worried face.

"Could I pick up clean clothes for Shinomori-san now, please?"

"Yes… the government people already came here and took the bodies away."

The two of them walked to Aoshi's room. There were men from the government still around. They all turned their heads to look at Megumi's direction and they'd probably tell her off but the manager talked first.

"It's ok, she's the woman that came with Shinomori-san, the doctor. She'll just pick clean clothes."

The men stepped aside and she could get to Aoshi's bag and draw a clean yukata from inside.

One of the government men addressed to her.

"You can take the bag to the other room, sensei."

Megumi nodded timidly and replaced the yukata inside the bag and held it. It was not heavy at all but the manager got it from her hands and they made their way out of the room. She knew and saw the corpses had been removed but she was not comfortable there in that bloodied room. The pungent smell and the remembrances made her feel sick.

She looked at both sides and told the manager to carry the bag to Aoshi's room and she'd just follow. Megumi hurried into her room. She needed to breath, the nauseas were too strong now.

XxX

The door cracked opened. Aoshi moved his eyes towards the newcomer. The tall man dressed in a western suit, hair well trimmed and small black eyes bowed respectful to him.

"Shinomori-sensei."

As Aoshi was lying down on the bed, he could do nothing but move his head down. After that, he forced his body to seat.

"We're so sorry for what happened to you. We had no idea it'd be so dangerous."

Aoshi thought of what he had said to Megumi back at Tokyo. That it'd be not dangerous at all, just like a vacation trip.

"They're from the group we're investigating. They are connected to guns merchants and their plan, as you know, is to grow this black-market under government's eyes. The result is five deaths and one injury."

"Five??? Who else died?"

"One old woman, part of the hotel's staff. The group probably killed her when they broke into the building. The poor woman was on their way."

"I see they show no respect." Aoshi vaguely said remembering the threat they also did to Megumi.

"But you don't need to worry, Shinomori-sensei. We've taken care of everything here and your stay may remain like first planned. I also brought the tickets back to Tokyo. The train goes tomorrow afternoon at three o'clock." Nakato placed one envelope on the dresser.

The manager knocked on the door. Nakato went and opened it. The other man handed him Aoshi's bag. Nakato came inside, closed the door and placed the bag on the sofa.

XxX

She recovered herself and washed her face. Once again, her hands were trembling and her throat was sore. She knew she'd probably be too pale now. But anyway, it was time to gather strength and return to Aoshi. There were things she left undone there.

Megumi recollected herself and strolled on the hallway. The hotel staff seemed to be less furious and afraid of Aoshi. She overheard someone even thanking heaven for his acts. So now, wasn't he the beast anymore? Some would smile sympathetically at her and bow happily. That was something she could not understand. The very people that averted her figure were now smiling at her.

"Thank you, doctor. Thank the gentleman too." One older woman came her way and bowed.

Megumi surely looked pretty puzzled. Why were they thanking and looking at her in such a lovable and relieved way?

She decided to make her way to the room Aoshi was now occupying the faster she could.

XxX

Nakato noticed Aoshi was gazing at the door's direction once again. He stopped talking and watched the blue-eyed man.

Aoshi suddenly turned around his head. He knew she'd open the door in one second.

Nakato got pretty scared when the door slammed opened. The beautiful doctor was standing by the doorway. Her face bore a mix of annoyance and amusement.

Megumi entered the room and closed the door.

"I hope you're done with the conversation." Her voice showed only annoyance now.

Aoshi slightly raised one eyebrow, pretty amused by Megumi's expression and tone of voice. But he didn't fight her although Nakato looked at both of them pretty puzzled. Shinomori Aoshi was not someone to be defied.

As Aoshi said nothing to the doctor, just like if he had ignored her presence into the room, Nakato collected his briefcase and bowed to Aoshi.

"Goodbye, Shinomori-sensei. Takani-sensei." The man turned on his heels to greet Megumi who still had the annoyed look. Her arms were crossed over her chest and her mouth was shut.

When the other man left, Aoshi turned his eyes to her.

"You're paler than normal." He observed she was also nervous.

"It's nothing." She said abruptly while pouring some tea for him. "By the way, you should be asleep."

He was just leaning against the head of the bed. Megumi came to him and made him drink the tea she had mixed with some medicine gotten out of her sleeves.

Aoshi couldn't let pass the fact her hands were shaking.

"I am sorry, Aoshi-san, but I'll take care of you today. You cannot move your arm."

He said nothing else and took his time staying quiet. After having all tea she would give him to drink, Megumi turned to his bag and drew a clean yukata from inside.

"I'll nee you to stand, Aoshi-san." She told him.

In fact, he was willing to change his clothes alone but he knew the doctor would not allow and the last thing he wanted for that night was a discussion that would end up either with a teasing or a very bad face and answer from the woman.

The onmitsu did what the doctor asked and stood up. Instantly, she untied his yukata and came behind him. She was fairly tall but Aoshi was much taller than her. She had to stand on the bed to make things easier. Carefully, she dressed him with his clean yukata. At last, she returned to the front and tied it. She had been clinical.

"Now you can go back to bed and rest." She said with a faint smile on her pale lips.

Megumi was standing still and helped Aoshi go back to bed. She covered him with his blanket and he closed his eyes meditatively. Knowing there was nothing left to be done, the beautiful woman arranged things back to their places and walked carefully to the door, trying to make the minimum noise she could. But she was pretty sure he was not sleeping although she would never wave off her hand to check it out. When she opened the door and half her body had already passed through it, a sound made her stop for one second.

"Thank you."

She smiled timidly and before closing the door, she replied.

"You're welcome."

A killer and a healer. The beauty and the beast.

XxXx

There were more to come in this chapter but I saw it was already long enough. I broke all my records with this one… many things happened here, uh? I hope I didn't let many gaps nor confused you. It took me more two weeks to set up with this one. It was not that I didn't have any idea, but this chapter was especially difficult for many things were supposed to happen in such a small event of time. And university was killing me… well it's killing me yet. I got impressed how I managed to write this long chapter talking only of one night. And it was NOT an entire night. Is there someone out there praying for me not to start describing one year at Megumi and Aoshi's lives??? But anyway, I loved when they were together… and Megumi's desperation about the _shura_. Ok. A small note on her deliriums from last chapter and this one. I've been reading on cities and places that affect people's mind and it really amused me! There were some cases in Jerusalem that people that when arrived there, thought they were back at Christ's time and they were some of the Apostles or even Jesus Christ and you don't have a clue of how crazy that can be!!! Ok… our dear Megumi is having a sort of strong déjàvu due the place effects on her debilitated health. Everything sounds, smells and looks like the terrorizing times she spent under Kanryuu Takeda's… it was a BIG trauma, uh? Sorry if it sounded too strange, weird and stupid… sorry, sorry sorry!!!

Small research prize: I got very happy to discover that syringes and hypodermic needles were introduced in 1850!

And of course, I couldn't let go the songs references. The first one is a bridge out of "Unspoken" that comes in the same album of half the lyrics of an astonishing song by Lacuna Coil (Italian band) I quoted when Megumi and Aoshi are together. This second song title is Heaven's a Lie and it was recorded on their most recent album called Comalies (2002).

I got just two verses out of the second song featured here and the verses are in italics when Aoshi asks Megumi to stay. The song is called Angel After Dark and it was recorded on "How Innocence Dies"(2004) a fantastic album of the Brazilian band called Avec Tristesse. This song is sooo nice and I'll surely be using something more of it and of Avec Tristesse songs in chapters to come.

Oh, another thing: Aoshi is not soft AT ALL. When could she get soft. He's just softer, the ice melted a little but what is it an ice cube to an iceberg? Well, since he spent so many years meditating, trying to find inner peace and a way to live again, it's rather normal that he could get a bit and I do mean a bit more affectionate towards person. So, if he'd never tell them what he felt, it's not that out of idea that now he can give some subtle hints. But, there's no way he'll ever be 50 soft…. 20 is my highest bet. One cannot just forget 26 years in a glance, ne???

Leila: did you get the 'nice things'???


	30. Walking on the Last Free Day

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Chapter XXX – Walking on the Last Free Day

Disclaimer: you already know it by heart…

XxXxXx

Megumi had a restless sleep. When she had returned to her room it was past four a.m.. She lied down and closed her eyes but many scrambled thoughts were just coming to her. Her body was so tired. There were the trip, the long walk, the party… she had surely done many things that day. Her eyelids were forced into sleep.

But her dreams were haunting. There was Takeda. There was the Okashira. The _shura_ and all that violence she wished she had not witnessed. It seemed crazy she had two sorts of hallucinations regarding Takeda in only one day. And she'd just wake up scared from her dreams and look around.

It was dark. Only dark. And she was alone. All alone in a strange city, far from Tokyo, far from the time when her life was a pure living-nightmare.

The doctor forced herself to sleep again. She buried herself under the blankets and held the pillows.

"You ought to sleep."

But night was so long and tense. She had to stand up and run to the bathroom a couple of times. Furthermore, no matter where she was, she remembered everything and the metallic smell of corrupted blood made her sick over and over again.

Megumi, due to sleep deprivation, felt like checking on Aoshi but she was afraid of him that night. She didn't use to be that afraid of his strikes during sleep. She had never seen him with a blade on his hands ready to consciously kill, she had never witnessed what she had been told by many others about his cold way and his perfect interaction with his twin swords. Now, she was afraid. Really afraid.

Considering sleep would do better to her body and mind, she returned to bed and wrapped herself, hiding into a protective blanket. It was very difficult to clean up her mind from all those painful thoughts but her body urged sleeping and her mind had to cede.

XxX

Megumi was not sure of what time it'd be. She looked through the glass window and saw the day was bright.

Immediately, she sat on the bed and rubbed her eyes. Her vision was blurry but she left bed anyway. Her steps were not firm, her bare feet led her to the bathroom.

She carefully washed herself trying to put sleep away. Besides sleep, there were the dizziness and the sickness that seemed to have attached to her since last night.

Megumi returned to the bedroom and picked up a navy blue kimono and a white smock. Lazily, she took off her sleeping yukata, folded it carefully and placed it back into her bag, dressing her recently picked up clothes then.

Her eyes finally found the watch she had been looking for since she woke up laying on the dresser, under her long black gloves. She reached out for it and got pretty amused it was almost nine in the morning.

The doctor hurried herself, brushed her soft hair, put her trademark lipstick and grabbed her medicine box before closing the door. She hastily walked to the end of the hallway. Getting to the door, she straightened up her body and glanced herself reflected on a golden-framed mirror hung right above a big vase of flowers. Politely, she lifted one hand and knocked on the door.

She waited outside for Aoshi's voice to come and tell her in. He'd surely know she was right there standing outside.

But no sound came from the inside of the room. Megumi knocked again, a bit more of strength on her knock that time. Yet, no response came.

She began to feel impatient. One finger curled a strand of hair near her face. Her hand went to the doorknob and tried to open it. She swung it back and forth. The door was closed. She slammed her fist against the door and called out Aoshi's name. Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

The impatience was giving place to despair. What could have happened that Aoshi would not answer her?

Once again she slammed both her fists against the door. The medicine box was laid right near her feet.

"Aoshi!!! Open this door. It's me, Megumi!!!" her voice was loud-pitched and bore a bit of her despair. He could not be sleeping. He was a very light sleeper and he'd have woken up when she had first knocked.

Megumi realized she was drawing attention. A maid had left one room and had put her face right out the doorstep to observe what was going on. The doctor blushed heavily.

"My apologies… it's that I have a patient into this room and it seems he's fast asleep… I must give him medicine…" she said apologetically.

The maid softened her features and smiled back at her.

"Don't worry, young doctor." She was actually coming Megumi's way, she had probably recognized the young woman from the previous day. "I can help you. I am in charge of the cleaning here so I have the keys. I can unlock the door for you to take a look at your patient."

The woman was already with the key into the lock hole.

Megumi smiled back to her and bowed to get hold of the medicine box again.

"Thank you."

The door clicked unlocked.

The maid smiled back at her and turned to enter the room she was previously tending to.

Megumi opened the door and took a step inside. Her eyes went immediately to the bed and, for her amusement, it was empty. The sheets were even straightened. A slight frown came to Megumi's face. She walked to the bathroom and saw there was no sign of Aoshi in it.

"What on Earth could have happened here?" she could not deny her worriment.

In a glance, she was sat on the bed, browsing into his bag. The trench coat was not there. Aoshi had deliberately left. He had probably gone to his duty.

Megumi rose to her feet really infuriated. She almost slammed the door when she passed, but she didn't want any more suspicious looks at her so she dropped the chance.

Her stomach was telling her it as time for breakfast and she went down the marble staircase and walked into the restaurant.

Megumi sat on the table, trying to look and sound normal. The waitress came with various muffins, cakes, tea, coffee. She was so nervous and anxious. She was eating and eating hoping nobody was looking at her. One foreign couple, however, was giving her odd looks behind her back.

When her stomach could not even get one more drop of water, Megumi decided it was time to stop. She'd do just something nice shopping and try to calm herself down. But the matter is that besides worried, she was angry Aoshi had disobeyed her orders as a doctor.

Megumi emerged on the main hall. When the manager put his eyes on the magnificent female figure coming from the restaurant, he left his papers and came on her way.

"Takani-sensei…" he bowed politely.

Megumi also bowed in response.

"Shinomori-san left this morning." He said without looking at her any further.

"I know…" Megumi sighed and said in a rather annoyed tone of voice. " Work matters, most probably."

"Yes. He left with Nakato-san and said he'd be back by the end of the morning…" the man still kept his head bowed.

"Thanks." She said and then the manager stepped aside so Megumi could move on the door's direction.

As she left, the other man looked at her waiting and expecting anything from the woman doctor. But she simply left without any word.

XxX

Megumi was pretty annoyed by Aoshi's decision of going into danger again. If only she knew which warehouse and which dock he had to check… it was undeniable her temper allowed her to go after him and drag him out of it, hit him on the head with her heavy medicine box. But Shinomori Aoshi was not Sagara Sanosuke. He had the power to make her behave. He would never have a woman dragging him by his collar, squealing and putting him into his place.

The woman doctor sighed looking at some far warehouses by the beach.

She remembered the streets she had walked with Ina the day before. There was nothing for her but to shop and she really wanted to buy some nice things she had seen before. It would also take Aoshi out of her mind for some time.

The day was hot and although it was a Sunday morning, there were some stores open. Not as many as she wished that could be open though. It was a very stupid thing that she forgot to buy things the day before. People were walking lazily on the streets around the bay, some kids were happily playing on the sand, and others were running to the sea. She also wished she could run to the sea and bathe. Yokohama was a light, bright and beautiful city now in spring. The sea smell and the beautiful bay were more than enough to calm her down and make her smile. People seemed to enjoy the city too and they looked happy being there.

The first stop was a small store. It had a tall western door made out of wood and glass. She entered it and felt amused by the delicious and sweet smell of it. Megumi looked at the walls and they had many shelves covered with glasses that ended up looking like a box. The boxes were filled with all sort of colorful things, sweets. Megumi herself was a sweet-addicted. She happily approached the counter and an old western woman smiled at her.

After some chat, the woman asked Megumi if she had ever tasted some of the western sweets. She handed the doctor a piece of a brown hard thing. Megumi touched and saw it melted with the heat of her body. Delicately, she placed it on her mouth. The other woman got happy when she read Megumi's expression.

"Wonderful!!! I am taking a bag of these! Oh, I also want 5 bags with all sorts of those there." She pointed various colored sweets.

Megumi paid and left the small store. There was somewhere she wanted to go and she prayed they'd be open. It was placed four blocks ahead the last store and it was opened. Megumi beamed.

"Great!"

When she approached the white store, she seemed to have lost half her courage and enthusiasm. Yet, she entered.

A young woman, maybe even younger than herself, came to her. She was also a western one. Megumi was strangely attracted by western things that weekend.

"How can I help you?"

She felt she could almost blush.

"Uh… I… I'd like to…" her eyes were roaming the store. Everything was very delicate. It was a store selling children things only. There were toys, cradles, clothes and all kind of western things for children. "See baby clothes." She finally spoke out in a lower voice.

"Follow me, please." The other woman requested.

Megumi had glimmering eyes on the beautiful things that were sold on the store. The woman opened a large chest and turned to Megumi.

"How big is the baby?"

"Oh, it is yet to be born."

The saleswoman's eyes shone.

"Congratulations!" she said in a very euphoric voice.

Megumi was too surprised. She blushed hard and her hands went to her belly almost instinctively.

"Thank you…" she said timidly. Nobody had ever congratulated her for her child.

"So… we don't know if it's going to be a boy or a girl. I suppose you'd like it to be a boy, uh?"

Megumi frowned on the blabbering saleswoman.

"Yes… well, no… not really. Uh, I don't know." She was visibly confused. She had never imagined that issue. It was obvious people would want their children to be a boy and carry out the family's name but she really didn't mind it.

The saleswoman smiled to her.

"It's your first baby, isn't it?"

"Yes…" Megumi's face was almost inside her smock.

Her eyes lingered on a hazel teddy bear into a transparent box. She found it just amazing.

"Could you take that toy, please?" Megumi pointed out the teddy bear.

The woman turned on her heels and got the transparent box and opened it.

"It is a lovely English teddy bear."

Megumi put her hands on it and felt the softness of its material. She smiled.

"Yes, it is… it is really lovely."

Her ears were registering a peaceful and beautiful tune coming out of a music box. She tried to find out which music box was that and she found a dark brown, circular shaped small one. There was a small replica of a woman dancing over it. A ballerina.

"I like that music." She thought to herself.

Something else on the counter drew Megumi's attention. It was a white piece of clothes made with a very soft fabric and with lace.

"It's linen, adorned with lace. Lovely, isn't it? And it fits a boy or a girl."

It was very beautiful indeed. Megumi picked up the small robe and lifted it up in the air. She imagined her baby into it. For the first time, she had pictured a feature of her baby: white skin and shinny black hair. It didn't mind if it were a boy or a girl. It was just beautiful. Something western people would call 'angel'. She smiled.

"A baby will look like an angel into this one."

Megumi turned her eyes to the other woman. She had just said what were into her thoughts some seconds ago. She almost grinned. White skin and shinny black hair. She wanted to picture the eyes. Dark brown or deep blue? Deep blue like his father's? His father. Aoshi. The doctor's smile faded fast and she widened her eyes. She had been shaken out of a pleasant dream. The white fabric was placed back on the counter.

"I will take it. And the teddy bear and that music box too. The one with the dancer on it." She said quickly. "By the way, what time is it?"

The saleswoman had a puzzled look. She couldn't tell what had gotten to the mother to be. She carried the items Megumi told she'd be taking and looked at the clock. "Ten minutes to midday, lady."

Megumi nodded. The woman wrapped the delicate white robe, the music box and the teddy bear and the doctor handed her the money. Shortly after it, Megumi found herself walking in long strides on the streets. As long as the kimono would allow, for sure. The heat was starting to affect her and the sun was strong. She felt dizzy and her vision seemed to be slightly blurred. She had to stop and hold on a wall.

"Breathe, Megumi, breathe…"

She had mused on her baby and forgotten about something important: Aoshi. He was injured and he had left. When she felt she could walk again, the doctor made her way back to the hotel. It was rather relieving entering the lobby. She instantly went to her room, going up the stair extremely slowly. She opened the door and with a great effort, she managed to get to the bed and throw her body against the mattress.

Megumi stood there, breathing, eyes closed, and a hand resting on her belly. She knew she shouldn't have run that badly in the sun. She felt recovered in some minutes, it was only something caused by the heat mixed with her nervousness. Once she could open her eyes, she looked around the room. The train would leave at three o'clock. It was time to start packing up. But, what about Aoshi? Megumi stood up and packed the things she had bought. There were not many things unpacked since she had always kept them into her bag. It was only the black satin dress, the necklace and the shoes she had worn last night. When it was over, Megumi decided it was time to go and check on Aoshi.

She walked on the hallway to the room he was now occupying. She knocked on the door and nobody opened it. Her hand went to the knob and she saw it was open. She peered inside and the room was exactly the way she had left and she remembered the scene earlier that morning. It was really frustrating. It was time to have lunch then… and she'd have it alone. On her way to the eating area, Megumi came across the same maid and asked her to lock Aoshi's room again.

Megumi decided to have lunch at the hotel. She sat on the round table just by the window. From there, she could see what was going on the streets. Not being hungry, she decided to eat little. She picked on a western salad, a French one and sushi. Nothing to drink. Her worriment was undeniable. Her brows were constantly furrowed and any carriage on the street would make her heart jump. Lunch was over and she asked for dessert. She chose to try something called passion fruit mousse. It was extremely delicious. But she could not care much and appreciate much the nice sweet for her mind was elsewhere and her mouth was bitter. Then, she saw a carriage stop by the hotel. Megumi stretched her neck the most she could to look at it. A man came out of it and she recognized him. He was tall, black trimmed hair. Nakato. Her heart pumped. The spoon she had been holding was filled with mouse and had stopped halfway her mouth. After the man, came a younger one. He was tall and handsome. Megumi knew it was Aoshi.

Her will was to leave the dessert right there and run to Aoshi and scold him for his stubborn actions. She would, then, go into tears and hold him. In front of the whole hotel. That made her blush and it would certainly make Aoshi unsettled. She fought all outbursts she could have and stood quiet on her seat, having her mousse. The long tablecloth made a nice hideout for her shaking legs. She didn't see Aoshi's head to the stairs. It was possible to see from where she took seat. Her eyes were fixed on the restaurant door. Suddenly, the tall man appeared on the same door she had been looking. She froze and ran her eyes from there; the spoon was coming and going from her mouth in an amazing speed.

Nonchalantly, he approached her.

"Megumi."

Aoshi noticed the angry and annoyed expression her face had. She was firmly holding a silver spoon, her eyes were closed and her brows were very furrowed.

"Yes?" she answered without opening her eyes.

"I'll be upstairs packing up. It's one o'clock. The train leaves at three."

"Good." She said inscrutably.

He turned his back to her and left. She knew he was there no more and she could not even look at him. Her dessert had been spoiled and she felt like screaming and hitting Aoshi on the head.

"No, Megumi, You're not going after him. You're going to finish your mousse and only then you can go and check him. He didn't die until now, he won't die in the next minutes either."

Megumi tried hard enough not to get bothered by Aoshi. It was a wise choice to keep her eyes closed and not to look at him. When the dessert was over, she lifted her body form the chair and walked upstairs. First, she entered her room, washed herself and picked up her medicine box. Then, she went to Aoshi's room.

Knock.

It took some seconds for his voice to come.

"Enter, Megumi."

He looked at her face. She was surprisingly 'aloof'. She eyed him from her standing position. Aoshi was sat on his bed, his legs were stretched over the mattress. He was packing.

Megumi's eyes narrowed at him.

"I came to check your arm."

He felt like hesitating. She thought he would fight and resist but in the end, he didn't.

"Right." He sat in a better position for her to take a look at him.

Immediately, he started unbuttoning his western white shirt. Soon enough, his bare chest showed up and he pictured Megumi's reaction.

When the doctor laid her eyes on Aoshi's arm, she really felt like killing him. She shook her head violently.

"My, my…" she approached him and opened her medicine box, taking cotton and an antiseptic medicine from inside and rubbing the cotton on his arm. She was really infuriated. "You know you shouldn't have done this, Aoshi. I don't want any explanations, I don't rule your live, you're a man of own means, I know, but think of your health before going around there fighting and doing things that are not of your concern!"

The wound was bleeding and she pointed another western shirt stained with blood over a chair. The stain was indeed big.

"There's a long time it's bleeding, uh?"

He nodded. His eyes were closed and if he was feeling any pain, he knew perfectly how to fake it.

She shook her head once again and sighed. "Men…"

Megumi cleaned his wound and circled his arm with bandages.

" You must have abused your arm, this is really bleeding bad." She took a small envelope from inside the medicine box and opened it. "Open your mouth." She said imperatively.

Only then, he opened his eyes and slightly arched one brow. Megumi sighed.

"Ok… have a pinch of this powder…" she handed him the envelope.

He did what she said. The thing she told him to have was very sour. Aoshi thought she might have wanted to lecture him.

"I don't know, Aoshi, I really don't know…" she said without facing him while packing her medicine back into her box. "If you were just like Sano, I'd just…" she cut the sentence in the middle. He had narrow eyes on her direction. Megumi turned her face away from his piercing blue eyes.

"Well, it's going to be two o'clock really in no time. We should hurry." She grabbed her medicine chest and walked fast to the door. "I am going to pack now…" she closed the door and ran to her room.

XxXxX

Aoshi was thoughtful into his room since Megumi had left. He had already packed and just waited for time to come. The luggage carrier knocked on his door and picked up his bag.

"The sensei's bags are already downstairs, sir." The young man said.

When Aoshi arrived downstairs, the manager was expecting him with a big smile on his face.

"It was a pleasure to accommodate you and Takani-sensei here in our hotel, Shinomori-san. We excuse and feel a lot for the incident last night."

Nakato had told the manager the men were plain thieves. Since then, the manager and the hotel staff showed great gratitude and respect towards Aoshi for delivering them from such rats. If Aoshi were not there, who knows what else could have happened? To make it more convincing, Nakato even took some valuable objects and put them into the men's pockets.

Aoshi just nodded. The man was babbling and babbling. Finally, Aoshi spoke out.

"Where's Takani-sensei?"

"Oh!" the manager jumped. " I saw her heading towards the beach."

Aoshi narrowed his eyes and said his goodbye to the man. Outside, he told the coachman to hang on for some seconds. The tall onmitsu went down the lane and he didn't need to go far. The beautiful doctor was already coming back. When she noticed he was going after her, she blushed and hurried her pace.

"I am sorry, Aoshi-san. I would never delay you though."

Aoshi didn't say anything. He just stretched his hand and helped her into the carriage.

Megumi felt sorry for going away. The city was very pleasant. She discretely looked Yokohama bay for the last time.

XxX

It was evening when Megumi entered her house again. The trip had been calm and normal. The two hours she spent into the train were boring, yes. She just sat there beside Aoshi and he didn't say a word to her. She also didn't dare starting a conversation.

She headed immediately to the bathroom, she needed a good bath. Aoshi entered the meditation room and closed the door.

It was the way both had chosen, wasn't it?

After bathing and before unpacking, she headed to the kitchen and prepared some tea. She was not sure whether Aoshi had eaten that day or not. She had left hot water and a bath prepared for him. Before entering the kitchen, she stopped by the meditation room and announced him his bath was ready. No response came from inside. Megumi would have thought he was sleeping but she heard him entering the bathroom some minutes later when she was boiling water and preparing rice balls. She had tea and ate her rice balls alone. Then, she called him to the kitchen but she didn't stay there. Megumi went to her bedroom unpack things.

After putting clothes to be washed into a basket, Megumi dressed her sleeping yukata. Sleep would do her good. The following morning, she'd have Saeko starting there and she herself would also start at Miksi Hospital. She knew she should go and check on Aoshi but he was just locked up into the meditation room and she didn't want to disturb him. The medicine had been given him anyway. But she felt an uncontrollable urge for happiness, musing over something good that you'd make her float into that gloomy house.

XxX

Aoshi had quietly finished his tea and rice balls alone. Megumi had already eaten as he could notice and she had already mixed his medicine into the tea. He was wearing one of his dark sleeping yukatas. He had spent time reading the papers he'd archive on the headquarters tomorrow morning as well as an issue on the chats he had with all those foreign politicians. There was something disturbing him though; and it was pain. He knew he had overdone that morning, he couldn't have used his swords the way he did. And he also had headache. But something caught his attention. It was a sound. A beautiful, low and delicate sound. His trained ears told him it was coming out of Megumi's room. He walked silently the hallway and the sound got louder and clearer. It was a beautiful music coming out of a music box.

Megumi's door was not totally closed and he could see inside. There was a dark brown music box over the dresser and it was playing that beautiful tune. But his eyes saw something with amusement. A beautiful woman was smiling into the room. Her white yukata was floating as she danced going in circles, spinning around. Her black hair danced gracefully, following the rhythm of her delicate dance. Her arms were open and getting the flow of the music but she would also embrace herself fondly sometimes. As the music played slower and slower, Megumi would spin less and then, she just lied on the bed, mumbling the same tune, her eyes fixed on the ceiling, a beautiful smile on her rosy lips.

It was amusing indeed. Aoshi watched the scene from the shadows where she could not notice him and decided to let her be. He didn't belong in such happiness.

XxXxXx

Sweet light chapter. And life comes back again.

University is killing me and I won't be free until December 23rd… awful, I know.

Thanks Leila and Ak0 for the nice reviews… now, I really gotta study!


	31. Entwined

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Chapter XXXI – Entwined

Disclaimer: you already know it by heart…

XxXxXx

Megumi had slept well. She knew it was time to stand up but she was feeling so lazy. There were many minutes she had woken up but the cozy bed lured her into staying more time. She looked to the large mattress and felt her heart kind of heavy. _Aoshi_. And it was time to face the day. The young doctor got out of bed and proceeded in changing her white sleeping yukata for a pale pink kimono and a white smock. Then, she brushed her hair for long several minutes, her mind was absolutely elsewhere.

She opened the shoji door and found her house into a deep silence. She meekly walked to the kitchen to fetch her breakfast. It was there she saw what time it was: seven thirty five a.m. and no signs of Aoshi around. She drank her tea distractedly, her ears and eyes much alert for any move into the house. But nothing moved but her fingers and her lips dealing with the food.

Megumi had just finished her breakfast when someone knocked on the door. She made her way there and opened it. A young woman dressing a navy blue kimono bowed deep.

"Good morning, Takani-sensei!" she said timidly, looking a bit unsettled.

Megumi opened a smile and watched the dark haired girl step into her house.

"Good morning, Saeko-chan."

"I came earlier for today is my first day and I'd have more time to learn things."

Megumi nodded and both women made their way to the clinic room. At the anteroom, the doctor showed Saeko where she should stay and what she should do, how to proceed and so on. Saeko was paying lots of attention and she was a smart woman so Megumi had no doubts she'd just do okay. When the chat about the job was over, Megumi turned herself to the door.

"Excuse me, Saeko-chan, but I have some things yet to be done inside. The clinic opens in ten minutes. I won't take long."

"Hai" the girl nodded and sat on the chair behind a desk where she would stay for the whole morning. " I will read the files to get familiarized with everything."

Megumi smiled and vanished through the door.

Once into her house, she immediately walked to the meditation room and pushed the shoji door open without knocking first. And for her shock, Aoshi was there lying on the tatami. Megumi was really startled. It was almost eight and it was totally unusual Aoshi was still sleeping. She got closer to him and bent her body. Her eyes lingered on his cheeks: they were pinkish. His brows were furrowed and watching his chest rise and fall, she noticed he was having more difficulty than usual to breathe. Alarmed, her pale fingers went to his forehead, putting aside his black bangs, and touching his skin. It was warm. Too warm. It was fever.

"Aoshi-san!"

But he didn't reply nor opened his eyes. "Aoshi-san!" she called louder.

Aoshi mumbled something that she could not understand. Immediately, Megumi pulled the blanket aside and opened his sleeping yukata. Her fingers worked on taking his wounded arm from inside the sleeve. When she managed to do so, it was time to take off the bandages. She frowned. Aoshi's wound was pretty sore, red and swollen. She closed his yukata, letting his arm out of it. Then, the doctor rose to her feet and made her way to the clinic. It was really impressing Aoshi didn't attack her as he had done during his sleep.

Hearing noises inside, Saeko left her chair and walked in.

"May I open the doors, Takani-sensei?"

Megumi was browsing her shelves for medicine. She distractedly asked Saeko to come in. The girl did as requested. For her surprise, Megumi's face was not good.

" Any problem, Takan-sensei?"

The other woman nodded.

"Yes… Aoshi-san. He's not okay."

Saeko's eyes widened. But she was out of Megumi's sight.

"Is it serious?"

"I don't know. I hope it's not… I hope it's a fair infection."

"Infection can kill, can't it?"

"Yes… but Aoshi-san is a strong man. And I can't allow that either."

Megumi's expression softened a bit when she found the bottles she had been looking for.

"Is there any patient outside?"

Saeko nodded.

"An old woman and a girl only."

Megumi's eyes looked away to the door.

"Tell them I will see the two of them soon. You can take their names, addresses and the usual profile, please."

"Yes."

Megumi watched the young woman walk gracefully to the anteroom whereas she made her way to Aoshi.

His brows were still furrowed and unconsciously, he bit his lower lip slightly, letting it go just in the same second.

"Stubborn Aoshi!" she thought.

And the doctor bowed over him and unwrapped the bandages around his arm. She put a powder medicine over it and let it there for some minutes. Then, she got a spoon and forced it through his lips. That would make the infection better. At last, she made her way to the kitchen and brought a bin of water. She soaked clean cloths on it and placed them over Aoshi's hot skin.

It was necessary that she returned to the clinic. Before leaving him, she wrapped his wounded arms in new bandages.

Saeko was sat on her desk and the patients were on the cushioned seats. Megumi opened the shoji door to the anteroom and put her head outside.

"Let's go?" she tried to sound ease.

An old woman entered the clinic room.

There was loads of work that morning. When she was done with the old woman, more patients filled the room. She didn't have time to go back and check on Aoshi.

It was midday and fifteen when the last patient went away. Megumi asked Saeko to close the clinic and she hurried inside. Aoshi was barely the same but his fever had ceded a bit. His cheeks were not pink anymore and he looked almost normal if it were not for the very slight furrow on his left eyebrow. But it was almost unnoticeable. Megumi sighed in relief when someone knocked on the door.

"Yes, Saeko?"

"Is he better?" the girl asked without looking inside.

"Yes, it really seems…" Megumi dimly smiled. Then, she rose to her feet and walked outside the room. "I will take a bath. It's my first day there at the hospital, but I cannot go and leave Aoshi-san like that…" she said while the two of them walked to the kitchen. "Come and have lunch, Saeko-chan."

Saeko followed the doctor to the kitchen. After washing their hands, the two women prepared a fast meal and had lunch. Meanwhile, Megumi heated water for her bath and for a soup she'd prepare to Aoshi.

"Takani-sensei…" Saeko called her while chopping vegetables.

"Yes?" Megumi sweetly looked at her.

"I can stay."

"Excuse me?" Megumi turned to her.

"It's your first day at the hospital and it's not good if you miss it. If you write down what I have to do and how to proceed, I can stay until you're back and watch over Shinomori-sensei." Saeko thanked heaven Megumi could not see her face. It was as red as the beet she was chopping.

Megumi pondered for a second, eyeing the younger woman.

"What about your mother and brothers? They need you there."

Saeko shook her head.

"Don't worry about them. I just want to help you."

The doctor smiled.

"Thank you very much, Saeko. You're extremely kind." She approached and placed one hand over the other woman's hand. Saeko raised her eyes and smiled back.

"So, I am going to take my bath, write the notes and gather things to leave. If his state turns worse, you know where Miksi Hospital is, just have someone call me there and I'll be right back, ok?"

"Yes."

Megumi bathed and put on clean clothes. She should be by Miksi Hospital at fifteen to two. She wrote the notes to Saeko, explaining everything in details. Then, she walked to Aoshi's room to take a look at him. And he was there, eyes closed, breathing better. She smiled and walked outside to the hospital.

Saeko read the notes many times and with extreme care. The soup was ready and she waited until it got colder. Only then she put it on a bowl and took to Aoshi's room. She felt ashamed like hell to get in and she knocked on the door.

"Fool." she thought. "He's asleep…"

Her thin hand slid the door open and her slender body went in. She tried not to look at him until she was sat near his futon. Saeko placed the bowl aside and gently put her hand under Aoshi's head to lift it so he could drink the soup. She was familiarized wit this circumstances since she had nursed her brothers and mother many times like this before.

Her fingers realized his hair was fine and soft. His facial features were serene and she tried hard not to stare to the man lying with the head on her hand. But he was certainly alluring.

The soup was gone and she walked to the kitchen to clean and wash the utensils. But she told Megumi she would watch over him carefully and she'd keep her promise. Soon enough, Saeko found herself sat by Aoshi's side once again. She closed her eyes but kept her ears alert.

Some hours later, her ears noticed a very soft moan. Immediately, she opened her eyes and looked at the man's face. He was frowning a lot. Her beautiful fingers went to his forehead to check his temperature. Mild fever. Nothing to worry too much. She placed more wet cloths over his hot skin. Saeko sighed. She didn't know what was happening. Why was Shinomori-sensei like that? She didn't ask anything to Takani-sensei for pure shame and because it was not her business. But her eyes couldn't help noticing the bandage he had wrapped around his right arm and that his yukata was pulled from his shoulder and tucked under his arm. A part of his collarbone was showing and her eyes, reluctantly, lingered there for a few seconds. She saw scars. Some were so thin that she could not even realize them unless she tried hard. Others were easily noticeable. She mused. Why did he have those scars? When had he gotten them? And why? She didn't know anything about that stranger lying right near her. She didn't know exactly his relation to Takani Megumi, her doctor friend. She just knew Megumi seemed to worry a lot about him and he seemed an honored man, helping the doctor out.

She blushed when she realized her lips were curved in a soft smile as she looked at his handsome features. She tried to wipe the thoughts off her mind and she could not say why he attracted her so much. Saeko blinked and sighed. It was a weird situation.

But suddenly, she noticed blue depths and they surely overtook her. He had opened his eyes and they were fixed on the ceiling. He didn't move tough. Then, he turned to narrow them, his vision was probably very blurred. Saeko instinctively bowed her torso to check on him. He turned his head slightly and his about-to-close eyes lingered on her face for a second. She blushed.

A hand was placed over Saeko's one. It was Aoshi's. The first thing that came to her mind was to pull it quickly, but he tightened his grip. And he closed his eyes.

Her heart was pumping. With his eyes closed, he parted his lips and mumbled a name while his grip was getting loose.

"Misao."

XxX

Megumi's first day at Miksi hospital was even calm. She had to see many patients, visit some units, learn about the new western medicines and procedures. But she was a very intelligent and accomplished woman able to learn things fast. There were some doctors wrinkling theirs noses to her. Anyway, it didn't disturb her much. She was not the only woman on the staff: there were nurses but she was the only doctor.

Matsyuama-sensei was always around eager to help her. He took his day to accompany her through the hospital.

When the afternoon began to turn orange and she had nothing else to do, Matsuyama-sensei invited her to drink something at the hospital's restaurant.

" I am sorry, Matsuyama-sensei, but I can't."

He smiled sheepishly.

"Your workday is already over!"

"I know" she looked at the hospital gate. "But I must go home."

His eyes softened.

"I see. If you give me ten minutes, I can take you home." He offered.

"Thank you very much, but it's still daytime, I can do it myself. I am sorry but I am really in a hurry. There's someone I need to tend yet."

He nodded.

"See you tomorrow, then, Takani-sensei"

She bowed and then turned on her heels, facing the gate and walking past it.

While walking on the streets, Megumi could not take her mind from her house. She imagined Aoshi would be ok since Saeko didn't send anyone to call her at the hospital. But it could be that maybe she didn't want to disturb Megumi.

She was rushing her strides to her house. When she crossed the garden, she felt her heart pumping. Megumi opened the door. The house was silent. She walked past the living room and saw Saeko sat on the hallway floor.

"Saeko-chan???" she called out.

The girl was leaning against the wall, her eyes wide open, her left hand pressed against her chest and her right hand holding it carefully. She turned her face to Megumi when she called out her name.

Megumi ran to the girl.

"Is there anything wrong?" he voice bore worriment.

"No, nothing wrong. He's… he's fine."

The door to his room was open. Megumi gazed inside and saw Aoshi lying with eyes closed.

"And you? Are you okay?"

The girl nodded.

"I gave him the medicine you told, I did everything you wrote there, Takani-sensei. He had mild fever earlier but it's gone now."

Megumi seemed calmer now. She walked into the room and crouched right by Aoshi's side. Saeko rose to her feet and stood by the door.

"He also opened his eyes for some seconds." She said.

Megumi turned her head to Saeko and shifted it back to Aoshi. Her fingers hesitated for a second. What if he strikes now?

"He also mumbled a name." Saeko added.

"A name?" Megumi asked puzzled and she withdrew her fingers from near his skin. She didn't touch him.

The younger woman nodded. She was still holding her hand next to the navy blue kimono fabric that covered her chest.

"What name?"

"Misao."

Megumi's eyes narrowed.

"Misao" she repeated.

Saeko nodded.

Megumi rose to her feet and walked to Saeko.

"It seems he's doing better. When was that?"

"Half hour ago, I think."

She smiled to the girl, walking to the living room. Saeko noticed it was a sad smile. She wanted to ask the doctor who was Misao but it was absolutely out of question, totally rude and inappropriate.

"Have you eaten?"

"It's not necessary, Takani-sensei. If you are not needing me here anymore, I'll make my way home now."

The sun would fade fast.

"Thank you, Saeko-chan. Thank you very much for what you did today. Tell my apologies to your mother for holding you here more time than what we had set."

The girl bowed deeply and went outside the door.

"Until tomorrow morning, Takani-sensei."

Megumi returned to Aoshi's place. She sat by his side and stared at his face for several minutes. Then, she checked his wound and it was less swollen.

Before going to sleep, she spent some time by his side once again, gave him medicine, soup and decided to check his temperature. He didn't strike nor wake up, so she decided to turn him and change his yukata. It was rather complicated to do that but she managed it.

"You called out her name. Misao's name." She said before bowing over him and placing his bangs aside. Her fingers caressed his skin more than took his temperature. "Good night." She whispered.

Megumi rose to her feet, wiped two tears that meekly stained her cheeks and closed the shoji door.

Aoshi opened his eyes when she was gone.

XxX

Saeko arrived early that morning but Megumi was already up. She had also set things for Aoshi who had no fever anymore.

When Megumi entered the meditation room that morning, he was awake, his eyes were open and gazing up.

"Good morning" she greeted him with a smile.

He bowed his head to her.

"You know you can't leave yet or rely on your arm, ok, Aoshi-san?" she stated to him.

"Aa." He surprisingly agreed. Aoshi had decided he'd allow someone take care of him that time and he'd cooperate with Megumi.

"Good." She said and proceeded in taking care of him.

Saeko noticed Megumi looked lighter and gladder that morning. Maybe she had realized that too.

"He's awake today! The fever is gone." The doctor said while setting things in the clinic room.

Saeko smiled timidly.

The morning passed on quick and midday soon arrived.

"Saeko, please, close the clinic. Aoshi-san's doing better today so you can go home. I will be inside, I'll take a look at him."

The young woman nodded and took her time organizing things for the following day.

When Megumi entered his room, Aoshi's deep voice stated.

"I'd like to sit down and walk, if it's possible."

She smiled.

"It is."

He was being a good patient. That amused her and let her glad. His big stubbornness had been dismissed that time.

"I'll help you sit first, then you can stand up and walk, ok?"

He nodded.

The beautiful doctor placed herself behind him on the futon. She put her hands under his arms and pulled him carefully up. He made his body rise without the help of his arm. She had helped him to sit. Strangely enough, Megumi didn't move aside once he was sat on the futon. She lingered there, knelt behind him, her chest pressed against his back. Her hands were suspended on the air like forming a protection circle around him. The tip of her chin touched the bare skin of his right shoulder as she lifted her head.

There was no reason for that act but she encircled his body with her arms, her fingers softy wrinkling his dark yukata. His eyes widened slightly and then turned to normal. Aoshi lowered his gaze to the pale slender hands that held him firmly and then he closed his eyes, feeling her gentle arms around his abdomen. He didn't react or objected when she held him. It was warm and delicate. He felt her heartbeats, the good warmth of her body and her soft breath on his skin. Aoshi only lifted his wounded arm from under her own and placed it over hers, his left-hand fingers less than one inch from brushing her right hand ones.

"Pain?" her voice sounded soft to his ear, a sweet mumble.

"No." he answered immediately.

Pump. Pump. Her heartbeats.

_The pain ain't hurting me_

_But what I fell when you hold me near._

Megumi also closed her eyes, trying to avoid the tears that were inevitably coming to her dark brown ones. There was only silence and his warmth cutting off her breath and the soft rise and fall of his broad chest. Her head rested on the bare skin of the back of his shoulder. She wanted to cup it over his own shoulder but the height difference between the two of them made it impossible. Aoshi breathed in. Jasmine scent.

Saeko entered Megumi's house to say goodbye. She looked for the doctor in the kitchen but she was not there. Most probably she was at Aoshi's room. She walked there slowly and noiselessly. Her eyes widened and she blushed hard when she saw their figures entwined that way. Immediately, Saeko went away without saying anything nor making them realize she had witnessed it.

Aoshi turned to open his eyes. He sensed someone else was there but he didn't mind and closed them briefly when he noticed the assistant was gone. Megumi couldn't have realized any presence there, about that he was sure. He could have pushed the doctor aside, he could have stood up when he realized someone approaching but the truth was that that time he really didn't mind they had been seen. He was hurting deep enough into those comforting arms.

XxX

I don't have a clue if I managed to write the hug scene ok. I imagined it so beautiful but I don't know if all delicacy is written down.

Ok, the verses in italics are an adaptation from song verses. The song is called "Higher Than Hope" and it's featured on the newest Nightwish album called "Once"( 2004). I love the song and the original verse too… and other verses… chances are it's also appearing again soon. To tell the truth, I just changed one word from it!

Watch out for next chapter!!


	32. The Curtains Fall

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Chapter XXXII- The Curtains Fall

Disclaimer: you already know it by heart…

XxXxXx

It was Tuesday and Aoshi was completely recovered. Of course the wound should be still hurting but he wouldn't say if it really were or not. He had gotten out of home the previous days to go to the Government headquarters, hand in and archive the files of his mission in Yokohama.

Megumi was also looking gladder as the days were passing and Aoshi was recovering well. Her mornings at the clinic were also fulfilled with lots of work and it really seemed to be an elixir for her. No need to mention her work on the hospital. The doctors and the manager were happy with her in only one week. She even mentioned to Kaoru they were showing less resistance towards the fact she was a woman.

Saeko was going there every morning and she seemed to enjoy a lot her work. She was visibly shy since last Wednesday and Aoshi knew why that was. But the girl was very perceptive and she never asked Megumi questions.

That morning was pretty sunny and beautiful. Megumi woke up and bathed calmly, returning to her room and dressing a light blue kimono and purple smock on. She looked at the mirror and smiled. Three months. She knew it would bring her some problems soon but she didn't want to think of them now. It really brought her pain to think that she and Aoshi were over. But had their relationship ever begun? Anyway, she had now something to remember, something to cling on, someone to call family. All because of him.

Smiling, she opened the door and walked to the hallway. Aoshi was drinking his morning tea into the kitchen. He opened his eyes and bowed his head slightly when she entered.

"Good morning." She responded.

She sat across him to have her breakfast.

After the silent meal, Aoshi stood up and watched the doctor for a few seconds.

"I am grateful for what you've done for me."

Her eyes widened. He continued as he watched her stand up.

"I don't want to impose my presence anymore. I am returning to Kyoto the day after tomorrow."

Megumi felt her breath stop for a second. Aoshi noticed she had winced. She looked at the floor for some seconds, musing over the subject, her lips firmly pressed against each other. Aoshi was looking totally inscrutable. As usual.

A knock was heard on the door. It should be Saeko arriving for another workday.

The knock brought Megumi back from her thoughts. Her eyes went to Aoshi's face and her lips curved into an extremely sad smile.

"You know you'll always be welcome here." And she left right after that.

He nodded into the emptiness.

XxX

Saeko was turning to be a great assistant. She was patient, lovely and caring with all patients. She was also very interested in learning and making things the best she could to please Megumi. And they had much work that morning. The weather was getting hotter and people were going into more activities outside and running into accidents as well. Sprained ankles were becoming a hit on the clinic recently. The young doctor tried to bury into work to set her mind free of undesired thoughts about Aoshi.

That morning was rather difficult after his statement. She was surely smiling at all her patients but her smile was rather sad and she noticed that when she caught Saeko eyeing her in a different way. The girl immediately turned away, trying to conceal the look she gave her. Megumi sighed and with a last smile, she tended her last patient that morning. So, there were only the two of them into the waiting room.

Saeko had opened her mouth to say something but she stopped halfway. Still, she hesitated but some minutes later, as she helped Megumi close the clinic, she decided to ask.

"Is there something disturbing you, Takani-sensei?"

Megumi tried to sound ease.

"No, dear. Nothing at all. I am fine."

Her assistant still looked at her for some minutes as she fought to keep the smile on her red lips.

"So, see you tomorrow, Takani-sensei." Saeko walked to the door and slid it shut with a comforting smile on her lips.

Megumi nodded. The time the door had been shut, her smile disappeared. She turned on her heels to walk back into her house. The door was opened by her pale hands and she entered. Silence. There was only silence. Her eyes surveyed the living room and the kitchen. No one there.

"Aoshi-san?" she called out his name.

But no response came from the inside. She didn't worry about his health anymore, he was pretty recovered, only his wound, obviously, was not healed yet. She made her way onto the hallway and stopped in front of the meditation room. The young doctor opened the door and saw it was empty. His belongings were still there though. He had left. A scene immediately came to her mind.

I'm so tired of being here  
suppressed by all of my childish fears

_She was crying out loud. I had regretted going there to destroy her glad days… I was so afraid… I left my room and walked through the corridor. Aoshi-sama's room was there, empty… I entered… I sat on his tatami. Misao's cry was louder from here…_

_It was a big despair… I started crying too…_

_ And if you have to leave,  
I wish that you would just leave;  
because your presence still lingers here  
and it won't leave me alone _

_That was torture… I was there into his room, looking at his things, invading his life like that. Everything reminds of him. His presence was intense in there. It made me very dizzy._

"_NO, it's not true…"Misao was crying into her room… "Why this? Aoshi-sama, you belong in here with us… with me and gramps, with Oniwabanshuu."_

_Those words from Misao hurt me deep… yes, his place was there… with them… I had no right to destroy this… I'll always be a ghost; I'll always live with his presence, not with him. What the hell was I imagining when I started all of that? What am I to him indeed? I am not part of his history, of his life, I didn't live with him his growing and all he passed through before… I am just a strange._

_ These wounds won't seem to heal  
this pain is just too real  
there's just too much that time cannot erase_

She caught herself doing the very things once again. It could not be possible! Megumi came back and stood by the doorframe. Her eyes were closed and her eyebrows were furrowed making her face show a painful semblance. Those weeks had been the greatest time record they had ever spent together and even though the fights, the misunderstandings, the silence and their break, they were worth it. But she had to wake up, she had to go over those remembrances, her feelings. And she opened her eyes as she closed the door to his room.

XxX

People were used to her presence at the hospital and she was enjoying working there. She hadn't had any difficult time yet, but she had several patients into intensive care she should check everyday. And it was her daily routine. The patients liked her presence and many used to engage in conversations either because they liked the doctor or because the hospital made them feel very lonely.

It was the end of the day and she was leaving her last patient's room when a young nurse came running her way.

"Takani-sensei, Takani-sensei!"

Megumi's eyes rounded at that sound. The hospital was always so quiet that the nurse's voice that loud sounded like an aggression to the ears.

"What?" Megumi whispered.

The young nurse stopped right before of her, she was panting. Probably she had run the whole hospital looking for her.

"Matsuyama-sensei needs your help. It's urgent! He's at the 'birth giving' room.

The young doctor nodded and made her way to where she had been requested. It was right on the opposite side of the hospital. She had to cross the beautiful garden but she could not smile at it and pay much attention that time for she was in a real hurry.

Her strides were long and fast and soon she knocked on the door. Matsuyama-sensei's voice came from the inside.

"Yes?"

Megumi answered immediately.

"It's me, Takani Megumi."

"Come in, Takani-sensei."

With that, her hands went to the knob and the door opened. She stepped inside and closed the door right behind her. Matsuyama-sensei was into the room preparing and washing himself.

"I am sorry to disturb you. I know it's your time to leave but we really need you now."

"A doctor has no time to leave as long as there's a patient in need." She answered immediately.

"It's true." He nodded. "We have a young woman on the other room. She's about to give birth and I thought it would be better if she'd stay with a woman doctor. She's scared and nervous. I hope you can help her."

"Sure!" With that, Megumi was already washing her hands, changing her jacket and sterilizing her medical kit.

When she was done with that, Matsuyama-sensei opened another door into that same room. They both went into it and Megumi saw a young woman lying on a bed. A nurse was by her side, telling her to calm down but she was just crying helplessly.

She was a beautiful young woman, very very young, as she noticed. The woman was in fact a girl, the same age of Saeko and Misao. Nineteen. Her long black hair was damped with sweat and her hazel eyes were sore and red.

Megumi approached the patient and tapped her hand.

"Calm down, dear. Everything is going to be all right. It's your first child, isn't it?"

Her voice was calm and sweet. The pregnant woman looked at Megumi and she held her cry for a second. She nodded, saying it was her first child.

"It's difficult, I know, but you're going to have your baby in your arms for you to cherish soon. Being a mother, holding a family is really a blessing." Megumi was saying comfort words she really meant. In some months, she'd be through the same, she'd have her baby in her arms and she'd hold something so precious, a family.

The birth procedure started. Megumi was the one expecting for the child whereas Matsuyama-sensei stood by the young woman's side, checking her breath and pulse. A nurse was also helping Megumi.

It took long minutes until the child showed up. Megumi smiled to the young mother as she saw the baby flowing from the young woman's body. The mother was shaking and breathing with enormous difficulty. Megumi got a warm clean cloth and wrapped it around the frail body of the baby. It had been a difficult birth. It seemed the mother would not make it.

"It's a boy!" she stated to the young woman who was lying seemingly lifeless. She had just fainted after the enormous struggle to deliver her baby. Matsuyama-sensei's eyes turned to Megumi.

Her facial expression was not smiley anymore. The boy didn't cry. The two doctors exchanged suspicious and worried looks.

"No, he's alive." Megumi whispered after pressing carefully the little arm of the baby and checking his pulse. "But…"

Matsuyama-sensei came to her and looked a t the baby. His lips were blue and his face was getting into a shade of purple. He took the baby from Megumi's arms and opened his mouth.

"The baby cannot breathe." He whispered.

Megumi's face shadowed. The nurse came immediately and cut the umbilical cord.

The doctor walked away with the baby in his arms. He patted his back and the baby gave a hint of cry.

"Where are you taking him, Matsuyama-sensei?"

The man was already halfway the door.

"To the other room. I need to clean him and make him breathe." With that, he disappeared with the newborn boy into his arms.

Megumi could not stand up. She was sat by the bed in the same position she had been during the last hour. Her eyes were closed and she felt so much for the baby. She had never lost a patient and she hoped the baby would not be her first. The nurse had stayed into the room to check on the mother.

The woman doctor was brought back to reality by a whinny voice.

"Where's him, sensei?"

It was the young woman.

Megumi tried to disguise her shaking hands and trembling voice.

"The other sensei took him."

"Can't I have him into my arms now?"

Megumi looked at the nurse.

"He'll be right back." The doctor answered as the nurse's downcast eyelashes.

"I… I didn't hear him cry."

Megumi rose to her feet and walked to the woman's side. She held her hand and breathed in.

"Your little baby had some complications. Matsuyama-sensei is taking care of him now. He's an experienced and nice doctor. Your little boy will be safe and sound into your arms soon."

The young mother winced. There was pain into her eyes and Megumi could see that well. The nurse gathered the medical instruments to be clean and replaced on their proper cases.

For the first time in her medical career, Megumi didn't know what to do or what to say.

"Just rest." She whispered to the woman.

She sat by the patient's side and lingered her hand over hers. The hazel eyes focused on the doctor's semblance and the woman started talking again.

"My little boy… I want him to look like his father."

Megumi just looked at the young mother's face. Her eyes had shifted from her face to the ceiling. When she talked about the baby's father a meek smile curled on her lips. But the smile disappeared in one second as the woman started speaking again.

"He… he died…"

"I am sorry." Megumi's grasp tightened as if she wanted to pass some energy to the other woman.

"Before…" her voice was now faltering "before I had a chance…" she gasped

"Calm down." Megumi told her fondly, trying to give her some comfort.

"Before I had a chance to tell him I was pregnant." Two tears rolled down her face and hit the pillow right underneath her head.

Megumi felt her heart heavy. Too heavy.

"I… I… need my boy. He's all I have, he's the best gift I could get from his father. I need him."

Tears were also coming to Megumi's eyes. Her hand went to the woman's face and shed the tears that were staining her tanned skin.

"Believe and cling on the idea that he'll be fine." The doctor's voice was also tremble now although it was filled with sweetness.

"May the other sensei help him and save me. I've got no family. It was only my boy's father and I. We were not married. His family members turned their back on him when we got involved; we began living together. And he died far away from me… seven months ago. And I regretted not telling him when I first discovered I carried his child into my womb."

The woman's words were hurting the doctor deeply. She felt all the pain that the other one had been through and she could connect it to her own pain. She was also alone into this world, not married, expecting a child ignored by its father. And he'd also go away before he knew it… she only watched the other woman weep for her deceased beloved and for her child's sake.

The woman silenced, only the tears remained making their paths on her cheeks and Megumi said nothing else. They just stood there, sharing the pain and waiting for any sign from the other room. Time was passing slowly but Megumi could see through the small glass window it was already dark outside.

Several minutes later, the nurse opened the door. The young mother was asleep. Megumi was looking at the hem of her own kimono and then her eyes switched to the nurse on the door.

"And then?" She whispered.

The nurse lowered her head.

"No!" Megumi let go an alarmed breath.

Matsuyama-sensei came right after and showed up on the door. Megumi's eyes widened when the doctor looked at her and whispered.

"He didn't make it."

She closed her eyes and felt them get filled with tears.

"You'd better go home now, Takani-sensei. I'll be here to tend to this poor mother for today." Matsuyama-sensei walked to Megumi and placed one hand on her shoulder.

She wanted to cry and cry. They didn't know that woman's history. They didn't know her suffering and her big hope into a newborn child.

"I-I want to stay." She whispered.

"No, it's better that you go home and rest."

Megumi decided to stand up and follow the other doctor's advice although her inner self was objecting to do so. She was mentally and physically worn out.

She opened her eyes and glanced the sleeping young woman for the last time. Her lip trembled. Matsuyama-sensei led her out of the room and through the hallway.

"The nurses will take care of her until I am back."

They were now about to walk into the garden.

Megumi gave him a puzzled look.

"It's night already. It's past nine. I am going to take you home."

Megumi had opened her mouth to protest when the doctor spoke again.

"I did everything. The baby could not breathe, we made him warm, we tried on his lungs but he couldn't."

The flower smell was intense now, they were right in the middle of the garden.

"I had never witnessed a child's birth and death like that." Megumi spoke.

"He was not your patient, Takani-sensei. I was the one to take care of him and his mother. I am sorry to have put you into this but your work was successfully done because you managed to help his mother delivering him into this world. Anything beyond that was my work, not yours."

"And that poor mother…" Megumi felt she could not continue the sentence. Too many tears were placed on her eyes and they would fall at any second as she remembered the woman's words, the distant gaze on her hazel eyes…

They were now walking the corridors and the other doctors were giving her suspicious looks. She decided she'd not cry, she'd not let any of those men see and consider her frail and weak. They would say she was not meant to be a doctor for women are too sentimental for such job. Megumi swallowed her tears and clung to her pride with all she still had. The white lights seemed to blind her and confuse her much more. Her stomach was turning and she felt she would faint. Still feeling that way, the two doctors arrived at the reception. A lean figure was braced against the wall. Megumi felt two blue depths turn to her direction when she first stepped in sight. His eyes met hers and she bowed her had, trying not to be caught up into his blue eyes. The lights made them get a mysterious shade, yet, totally astonishing.

Matsyuama-sensei winced and bowed his head to Aoshi.

"Shinomori-san. I am sorry. It was my fault Takani-sensei took so long. I hope you are not too upset for waiting this much time."

Megumi noticed Aoshi was frowning slightly. He didn't eye Matsuyama-sensei, his blue eyes had been focused on her the whole time. But when he realized she had cried some hours before and that she looked withered, he shot the man doctor a threatening look.

"Take her home." Matsuyama-sensei said and took several steps behind.

Megumi stepped forward and Aoshi approached her without saying a word. She realized he was wearing a black western suit, which meant he had been working that afternoon and maybe he hadn't gotten back home since morning.

"You don't need to come tomorrow, Takani-sensei. Rest instead. You've worked overtime today."

Only then Megumi opened her mouth to say something.

"I hope you're not dismissing me for tomorrow because I am a woman, sensei."

Matsuyama-sensei shook his head vehemently. Aoshi's eyes had also narrowed at his statement.

"No! No way! I apologize but I truly didn't mean that way. It's only that you must be tired. I myself will take the day out tomorrow."

Megumi nodded and waved farewell. Aoshi bowed his head to the other doctor.

When they were outside, he placed an arm around her shoulders and brought her near. She sighed and let herself be comforted by him. It was impossible to fight her tears that moment. Nobody was looking, nobody would tease and talk behind her back. The tears flowed and ran down her pale cheeks. She soon started to sob lightly.

Aoshi didn't ask anything. It was not time for that. But he swore he'd find out what was happening and if any of those stupid doctors had anything to do with that and if any of them had caused her tears… they'd surely pay the price. The truth was that he couldn't stand any harass towards the ones he liked.

They walked the streets slowly and silently. He pulled her closer when she started sobbing , earning him a strange look from the woman doctor. Was he just displaying some kind of affection in public? There were not may people on the streets that time though.

The wind was blowing cold, especially cold for a mid spring night. If it were not enough, she was now feeling cold, the wretched wind was blowing through her kimono and making her skin crawl. For her relief, they finally got home. Aoshi led her inside her bedroom.

"I'll fetch hot water for you to take a bath. And something for you to eat too. It's late and you must be hungry."

"Thanks" she said wiping some tears with the back of her hand.

Aoshi thought everything was suspicious. He had left in the morning while she was working at the clinic. He knew that when he came back, she would not be there, she'd be at the hospital. But things really took longer than expected and he couldn't be there waiting to walk her home after her workday. So he walked to her house and for his surprise she was not there. Immediately, he made his way to the dojo. Yahiko told him she hadn't shown up there for two days now. So, where could she possibly be that time? It was already dark. So Aoshi made his way to the hospital.

The clerk informed him Takani-sensei hadn't left yet and that she was busy inside. He decided to wait there and walk her home when she'd be done. And for his amusement, hours later, she showed up looking like that.

When Megumi got out of her bath, she saw Aoshi standing by her door with a tray on his hands. He was not wearing the coat nor the tie anymore. Only the white bottom shirt and the black pants.

"You must eat."

She entered her bedroom.

"Have you eaten? You were not here at lunch." She retorted.

"Yes."

Aoshi watched as she got on the bed, leaned her back against its head and took the miso soup bowl.

"Just rest. I'll be back to retrieve the bowl later."

Megumi tucked some strands of hair behind her ear. Her eyes trailed the hem of her royal blue yukata as she had the soup Aoshi had prepared. It was smelling good and the taste would be good too if she managed to feel it. Her eyes were burning and sore. They would be most likely red and revealing her feelings.

The strong scenes and words she witnessed were whirling into her head. At a certain point, she could not have the soup anymore, she was hurting physically and mentally. It was amusing the way she had gotten intrinsically affected by that story. She heard Aoshi was in the bathroom bathing before he'd lock himself up into the meditation room. She placed the bowl on the tray and left it over a low table by the bed. Then, she placed her body under the white layers of sheets and blankets, adjusted the pillow and lied comfortable on the bed. Her brown eyes were facing the wall, her back turned to the door. And her eyes were burning and heavy but pain was there not to let her fall into dreams.

Aoshi's steps could not be heard into the house. He paced silently into her bedroom, the door had been half open since he left and it was still like that. His eyes surveyed the room and laid on the tray over the table by the bed. She hadn't eaten everything but he thought it was enough due her state. The doctor was tucked into the sheets and he'd swear she was asleep if his well-trained ears would and could not hear the extremely low sobs. She was still crying. His firm hands were placed on the tray and he took it to the kitchen. There, he cleaned everything and before retiring for the night, he poured some tea into a cup and drank it peacefully.

"Questions can be done later." He thought.

The onmitsu rose to his feet and made his way to the meditation room. While passing in front of her room, he glanced at her figure placed against the soft mattress. Motionless, lifeless if it were not for the sobs. One male hand was placed on the shoji panel and it'd be shut. Aoshi hesitated for a second. Exactly that time, she shifted her body and turned her face to the door. There he was, holding the door, about to close it at any second. There she was, lying on the bed, her dark eyes open and fixed on his tall figure.

They both hesitated. It was Megumi who broke through inertia.

"Come inside." She whispered.

His hand slid from the door and his lean figure stepped inside her room. He walked to her bed and stood there, his blue gaze lowered to her semblance. She moved slowly, making room for him and she sat on the bed.

"Sit down, please."

Aoshi did as requested. He sat beside her on the bed.

"I found strange your delay today." He stated. He was not looking at her, his eyes were looking forward.

Her fingers curled into her sleeves.

"I am sorry… I could not help…"

"No need for apologies."

"How was your day? We hardly met today." Her voice sounded calmer to his ears, yet, he could notice something strange: she was worried about something.

"Normal. Some decisions to make, some last-minute affairs to deal with. If it's your will" he paused "I wish you could tell me about your day." She didn't realize he was glancing at her with the corner of his eyes.

Megumi breathed in and took her right hand to her face. She shed one last tear and also put her hair apart of her face.

"I had a normal peaceful day…" awkward pause "until it was time to leave and Matsuyama-sensei called me…"

Another gap. Aoshi didn't say anything for some seconds, he just kept his eyes on the wall before him. Megumi buried her face in her hands.

"You don't need to tell me if you don't feel like doing it." He stated and began to lift his body from the bed.

A frail and cold hand placed its fingers on his right wrist. Aoshi lowered his eyes and saw her pale hand, shaking at the attempt to hold him.

"I am sorry…" she pulled her hand back and placed it over her chest. "I just mean that you don't have to go… I want to talk."

He sat back at the same position.

"I am here to listen." He said deeply and in an extremely low voice, it was almost a whisper.

She tossed her head and gazed the ceiling for some minutes.

"Matsuyama-sensei called me and asked me to help him with a patient. She was a young mother to be. When I entered the room, she was crying a lot, she was so afraid."

The doctor frowned. Aoshi realized the memories were hurting her. He thought about telling her to stop, they could talk the next day but she was faster and continued her sentence.

"She seemed more comfortable with a woman doctor assisting her. Anyway, it was a hard time, it took so long for the child to come and the young woman was so frail that it seemed she wouldn't make it."

Megumi's eyes were beginning to be filled with tears again. Her voice had become muffled and he saw she was pretty nervous for her hands were squeezing the blanket hem.

"It was a boy. The mother fainted shortly after she gave birth to the boy. But the baby didn't cry. We knew something very wrong was going on. Matsuyama-sensei came and took the baby away, he told he'd try to make him cry and breathe. He was not breathing. And he took so long. I could not stand up. So, the mother recovered herself and asked about the baby. She didn't hear him cry and she knew something was wrong. I tried to comfort her and she ended up telling me her story."

A new pause came. Nervousness was getting to her quickly and violently.

"Megumi. You'd better stop now and go to sleep, we can talk tomorrow if you want." Aoshi told her. His voice held a hint of warmth.

She shook her head vehemently.

"No. I want to talk, I need to talk or my chest will burst. I can't take it anymore. I can't take it alone anymore, Aoshi-san!" Many tears came down her face and wet the neck of her royal blue yukata.

Aoshi sighed and closed his eyes. If she wanted to talk, if she wanted to share her burdens, he'd not object to it.

"She was so young. She had no family, only a love in her life. They were not married…"

Aoshi's eyes shot a glance at Megumi's direction. Was she telling her life or the young mother's life?

She didn't see the odd look towards her, her body was now swinging back and forth on the bed and the words sounded constricted.

"His family didn't like her but they lived together. And she got pregnant. He died."

A sob cut her words.

"He died, Aoshi-san. He died far from her. And she never got the chance to tell him she was expecting his baby." The last past of the sentence was a muffled thin scream.

There was only her deep breath, the sobs and the rustle of the sheets her hands were squeezing. Aoshi closed his eyes and bowed his head.

"And hell was not over. Misfortune never comes singly. She spent months alone, craving for her baby for it was the best thing her deceased love had left her with. She was so tired after this that she fell asleep. I didn't go away and stood there until the nurse came back and opened the door. Mastuyama-sensei was right behind her. The baby was dead. And that poor mother had so many hopes about him. I didn't want to leave but Matsuyama-sensei told me it'd be better if I went home and rest. And then, I met you there and we came home. That's all of my day."

"I am sorry." He said deeply right after she concluded her speech.

Aoshi thought it'd relieve her if she'd share it with someone but it didn't. There was something else burning her, disturbing her, something he didn't know, something she was concealing.

She was shaking desperately. Aoshi glanced her desperate semblance and something came up at his head.

"Rest your head, Megumi. I shall not leave your side tonight. I'll be here watching over you. Unless you want to stay alone."

"No. Please, it's good if you stay."

Aoshi was about to stand up. He would go to the closet and get a futon and place it beside the bed. Realizing he'd leave, Megumi held his arm.

"You don't have to leave this bed." She murmured.

With that, he bowed towards her and suspended the blankets. She understood what his gesture meant and she made her body slid into them once again. He lied by her side. They were both facing the ceiling.

His strong hand crawled under the sheets until it met a frail, shaking and cold one. His finger lingered on the back of it and then, they closed around her delicate hand. Aoshi didn't know what took him to do that but Megumi was just looking beaten, frail and his senses told him to try to warm and comfort her in the way he could. Just the way he comforted a crying Misao many years ago when she had a bad nightmare and would go running to his bedroom.

She felt a warm feeling into her heart the time their hands met. But a draft of chill came right after it and she feared. She feared so much. He would also go away and she'd have been negligent. Instinctively and desperately, she rushed and moved towards him, leaning her head on his broad chest, holding him with strength and pain.

_But there is nothing but silence now_

_Around the one I love._

_Is this our farewell?_

Aoshi got surprised by her instant reaction. But he didn't say anything. She was hurting deeply. She needed comfort and although he was taken by a ruthless and emotionless one, that time, he could not help when she was into his arms, longing for protection. He had once sworn he'd protect her against anything. And his sense of devotion and loyalty towards the ones he liked was strong. He looked at her and saw her dark eyes narrowed in pain. He adjusted his wounded arm and held her back trying to make her realize he was there to comfort her somehow.

_Sweet darling, you worry too much._

_My child, I see sadness in your eyes._

_You are not alone in life _

Although you might think that you are.

"You are not alone, Megumi." He whispered through her perfumed hair.

Her lip trembled and her hand claimed the fabric of his yukata. She breathed in with great difficulty. Aoshi felt her body shake against his. He knew there was something else on those eyes but he was not the one to ask her now. Her cheek brushed the bare skin of his chest that could be reached through his yukata. Slowly, she rose half of her body. Her hands were placed at each of his sides. Her eyes lingered on his blue ones for some seconds. Her long dark silken hair was cascading down, the strands were hanging beautifully on the air, and some others reached his torso. Her rosy tremble lips parted and her voice sounded weak.

"There's something else you need to know before you return to Kyoto, Aoshi-san."

His eyebrows raised slightly. He leaned his body, half lying on the bed. Her eyes were now exactly right in front of his but he could not see them anymore. They were closed. She sighed and he wondered why she couldn't keep the eye contact that time. It was difficult to keep eye contact with him. When she reopened them, her eyes were drifting on the white sheets.

"I don't want to hide it anymore and I just had to gather too much courage and strength to tell you… but I never want to regret this for I haven't tried it. I have to say it now before you go…"

Pause. Her heartbeats were too hearable. Her fists closed and her nails hurt the soft pale skin of her palms. Her chest rose and fell fast. Aoshi was just waiting for her lips to part again and speak the words she had gathered from courage and strength.

Once her eyes were open again, they were wider and something shone sadly into them. Her rosy lips parted and he felt her warm breath touching the tip of his chin.

"It's now or never, Megumi." She thought.

"I…" she began but cut off.

He was alert.

"I am expecting your child."

XxXxXx

GOSH! We've all been waiting ten chapters for this moment. And it finally happened. Ok, I feel lighter now I've finally written this… ooh, I feel like I can breathe again… I must tell things will go on faster from now on.

Features a small memory back from chapter VIII when Megumi and Misao met in Kyoto.

Back to this chapter. And then? Much angst? I felt loads of angst while writing and the soundtrack just helped me SO much! For the grand finale, I had to rewind the song I was listening to so it could match the end of both. Thanks Nightwish for writing and playing Swanheart!

But the song reference is not from Nightwish here. The lyrics mentioned are form a Dutch band called Within Temptation. The song is Our Farewell featured on Mother Earth (2001). There were ages since I last listened to it and I was just writing when it came to my head and I could not remember the lyrics properly, so I ran upstairs, got the CD and Discman and typed the lyrics while listening to it. I'll begin typing it on the weekend. COMING NEXT: I can already reveal the title of next chapter. And the title is: **Rejection.**

**Yvonne:** Thanks! I try to update the faster I can!

**Chromegirl**: Oh, thank you very much! And what about Sano, you ask… well, we gotta hear of him on chapter XXXVI (which I am currently writing), XXXVII in worst possibilities!

**Ak0 and Leila:** thank you always!


	33. Rejection

Chapter XXXIII- Rejection

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: you already know it by heart… right: P

XxXxXx

Aoshi's eyes widened.

After speaking, Megumi's head fell and she turned her body to sit on the bed. Aoshi's lips parted as if he'd say something. It was undeniable he was rather in shock but she could not see it. Thick tears came to her eyes and both fear and relief were mixed. She swore she wouldn't fear but when time came, it was impossible not to have it haunting her heart.

His fingers closed around the hem of the blanket; trying to collect himself again after the news, he looked at the female figure sat right there beside him. By the position of her hands, she was crying. He could not see her face but it was clear it was buried into her hands in a desperate scene.

Megumi cried in fear. Her heart was both light and heavy. She had told him and now she feared so much. Rejection. She feared rejection. What if he rejected her and her baby? She'd be too alone and too afraid. And his silence was also killing her. His usual killing silence.

"Megumi." His deep voice echoed into the room.

She was afraid to turn around and face him. Her fingers wiped some tears away from her cheek and she answered with faltering voice.

"Y-yes."

"We need to talk."

She felt a sting trespass her chest. She knew it'd be too difficult now. Turning around, she tried to look at him.

Aoshi raised his blue eyes and examined her profile.

" I know you're tired but I feel this can't wait." He continued.

She only nodded in acknowledgement. "I know…"

"For how long?" he asked her.

The doctor breathed in.

"Three months. Maybe one or two weeks more, but no less than three months, no more than four."

"Three months…." he repeated and his eyes closed, giving him a thoughtful expression.

Before he could say any unwanted thing, Megumi completed: "I found out only when it was about two months, you were not here, you were engaged in battles at Hokkaido. I didn't know what to do… I… really…"

Aoshi was totally motionless.

"Why? Why didn't you tell me before? It's been more than one month I am back…"

"I-I know… but… I didn't know how to tell you. I was…"

"Afraid?" he cut in.

She nodded.

The young doctor should have really been too afraid. Alone, afraid and pregnant.

Aoshi breathed and only then Megumi looked at him from above her left shoulder. His eyes were veiled by his black bangs but she could tell his facial features were pretty normal.

"So" he continued "that's the reason you've been sick. And is this the reason why you tried to kill yourself?" his blue gaze was inquiring.

Megumi took her eyes from him that very moment.

"You had left me, Aoshi-san. How would I know you'd return like you did that very day and found me here? I was afraid to tell you. I tried telling you I was pregnant but I couldn't. When I spoke, you were already gone. It was too painful."

He lowered his head. "I see… so… you bled… and Kaoru said it was nothing. Was it?"

"The beginning of a miscarriage. But the baby is safe now. And, despite of what you thought, I didn't try to kill myself. And it was not an abortion attempt either."

Aoshi's eyes widened slightly and narrowed again.

"I just wanted to rest. I took medicine to sleep but my body was debilitated and the effects were bigger than they should."

Aoshi didn't say anything. But Megumi felt a great will of telling things and she kept on talking.

"And you returned. When you were at Hokkaido with all those death wishes, I was too insecure. I really wondered if I'd have this child or not. But the feeling grew on me and the fear was replaced by a nice feeling of motherhood and I realized I had to keep it."

That time a sad smile crossed her lips.

Aoshi finally moved. He stood up and walked slowly to stand in front of Megumi. She couldn't look at him but she knew he was looking at her. She held her hands around her body and closed her eyes, her chin touching her chest.

"Megumi." He spoke once again and his voice was deep.

She shivered. He had finally reacted and she was afraid of what would come.

"Megumi, marry me." he said.

That time, she felt the world spinning fast. She frowned in disbelief and only then looked at the lean figure standing before her.

"E-excuse me?"

"Marry me."

So, it was not an illusion. Shinomori Aoshi was in fact there, standing before her, eyeing her with his blue depths and asking her to marry him. She blinked many times.

The young woman stood up and went past the onmitsu. He followed her with his eyes. She looked at him and noticed his look on her belly.

"It's not noticeable yet." She remarked.

Aoshi raised one fine brow but kept accompanying her on her walk around the room. Suddenly, she stopped by the mirror and looked at him.

"Aoshi-san…I … can… cannot marry you."

His eyes narrowed and he frowned.

"I understand your ways, you're an honored man, you want to do things right now but this will end up so wrong."

"You carry my child, I cannot leave you like that."

Megumi sighed.

"You know this is all I've ever wanted. But I don't want it like this. We're over our relationship and that was the best way. I couldn't endure it anymore the way it was… but now you ask me to marry you and I can't."

"I have responsibilities regarding you and this child, Megumi."

"I know. You're its father…"

Aoshi's eyes got a different shine when he heard the word father.

"But…"Megumi continued " it is not fair you marry me for it. I won't be happy being with you knowing you're here just because I got pregnant. And you will attach yourself to a person you don't love, a person you didn't choose at will to be your wife."

It hurt. It really gave her lots of pain to tell him that. Tears came once again to her eyes. He wanted to marry her for the baby, because he had a strong sense of honor and responsibilities and not because of love. She had always dreamed of marrying a man she loved. She was also strong and wouldn't behave as a foolish girl, she had always been on herself but deep inside, she knew she wanted to be loved, she wanted to have her family.

"I- I thank you for your offer, Aoshi-san, but I can't accept it. But I want you to know, before you go back to Kyoto, that I am fine and happy and that I also thank you for giving me something I never had. Somehow, I'll have a family. My family. There will be me and my baby and we'll live happily."

He walked towards her once again. Megumi analyzed his expression. His eyes were narrowed and his face was stoic.

"You know how difficult it is for a woman alone with a child in this world. I know you can live like that but isn't it too much? You already suffer for being a woman doctor… what about now? A single mother… world is not sweet, you know it."

The young woman looked down…

"I know… but… I've survived till now, haven't I?"

"Move with me to Kyoto, then. Nobody knows you there. You don't want to marry me. It's going to be difficult for you to live here since everybody knows you. Go there and you can live in peace."

Megumi thought on his words for some seconds. He was standing before her. She had stepped back and now her body had met the wall.

"I can't. I've got a nice job at the hospital. I've got my little clinic… I've got my friends…"

"You'll always have your friends. But… do you think they will keep you at the hospital when they see you're an unmarried pregnant woman?" he sounded bitter.

Megumi turned her face to the other side and bit her lip. Aoshi was making a point. He was logical and right as always. She was brought back to reality when both his strong hands were placed on her arms.

"I've never had to insist this much with nothing in my whole life. But my decision is taken. I won't let you go through hell because of me. I understand you don't want to leave Tokyo, that your life is here. And I also see you rejected my proposal. But I'll have to impose for your own sake. I am going to stay by your side until the baby is born. We can tell we got married. I've been here anyway and you've been missing some days so nobody will find it strange. We'll fake it until the baby is born. After that, we continue our lives."

Megumi widened her eyes and blinked in confusion.

"Don't tell me what to do!" she said in an annoyed way.

"You'll see it's the best choice. After that, I'll return to Kyoto and I'll never come back here again so you can tell everybody I died, I went away, whatever. If you don't want to keep the baby, I'll take it with me. If it's staying, don't worry, I'll be far but I won't fail and I'll provide everything it's needed for you and my child to live well."

Megumi's eyes bore shock. She was mortified. How could Aoshi think of all of that? He let go of her arms and walked to the door.

"Think. Good night." He slid the shoji shut.

For some good minutes, Megumi felt paralyzed. The nerve of that man! How could he just propose to her like that when he didn't love her and after all, say they'd fake it until the baby was born? She walked to the bed and grabbed the pillow, punching it several times. Worse: how could he EVER imagine she'd not want to keep her baby after it was born? What kind of person did he think she was? And how would she give away her baby to be raised in a house full of onmitsus?

She was truly fuming.

XxX

Aoshi entered the meditation room and sat on the futon.

Father.

He remembered Megumi's words and the jump he felt into his chest. It made him remember of when Misao was a little girl and he'd take care of her. Now, it'd be slightly different. He'd accompany a pregnancy and it would be his own child. A child to carry his name, his blood. Yes, he was amazed.

But there was something making him uncomfortable. Megumi would not allow him to keep his child, he knew it. He'd just have few moments with his child. Its mother would never let him go to Kyoto and be raised by onmitsus. It was undeniable he was glad. He just didn't know how to show it. He wanted that child and he didn't mind imposing for six months. He had six months to change her mind.

He understood her reasons. She didn't want him to be unhappy staying with her, attaching himself to someone he didn't love. But if he proposed to her, it was because he really didn't mind at all staying with her, but she could not understand it.

XxX

Megumi woke up with a knock on her bedroom door. She lazily opened her eyes and stumbled to open it.

Rubbing her face, she looked to the hallway and saw Aoshi. He realized she looked annoyed at his sight but he was there to announce Saeko had already arrived.

"It's late, Megumi. Takakura Saeko has already arrived. I can dismiss her if you don't feel like working today."

"No… I'll be right there in some minutes. Excuse me."

Megumi got clean clothes and changed into them. Then, she brushed her hair and decided to look beautiful.

Some minutes after that, Megumi entered the kitchen and saw Aoshi and Saeko having tea. The girl smiled to her, stood up and bowed deeply.

"Good morning, Takani-sensei!"

Megumi smiled back. "Good morning, Saeko-chan."

Gazing at Aoshi, Megumi saw he was impassively sipping his tea with eyes closed. A smirk showed on Megumi's lips and she walked to Aoshi and laid a kiss on his cheek.

"Good morning, **husband**."

Aoshi's eyes opened that same second and widened at her direction. Megumi could say he had blushed if he were not Shinomori Aoshi. He had been caught on his own game. Off guard.

Megumi took a seat beside him and acted as if she hadn't noticed the blue narrowed eyes at her or the mortified expression Saeko was trying to hide.

"Beautiful day, uh?" she said sheepishly.

Saeko nodded in response.

Aoshi was just stoic. He continued sipping his tea and shooting Megumi odd looks. But she was just _pretending_ not to see them. So, she had thought and she had agreed with his proposal. He only didn't think she'd act like that after looking so annoyed few minutes before.

Saeko finished her tea and stood up, saying she needed to open the clinic. Megumi smiled and watched her go.

The two of them were finally alone. Aoshi kept on looking at the doctor as if waiting an answer or anything. Once the girl was gone, Megumi winced. Now, she looked tired and much less radiant than she had been seconds before.

"So…" Aoshi begun

Megumi turned her head to face him.

"We have to make people believe, don't we?" then, she just shook her head. "Tsk, tsk, I thought an onmitsu knew better…"

Aoshi sighed. He was not willing to play her teasing games.

Megumi left her seat, gathered her things and walked to the clinic.

Aoshi still stood a bit more inside the house. He walked to this room and changed into a western suit. Thoughtful. Absolutely thoughtful. Then, he left to work.

Megumi couldn't help noticing the expression Saeko still had on her face. Somehow, it made her want to laugh. It must have been really shocking to the girl to see that. One day, people just wake up calling the others husband.

The clinic was not full that day. At about midday, there was no work left to be done and Megumi went to the waiting room to chat a bit.

"Pretty calm here today, uh?"

Saeko smiled shyly. "Yes, sensei."

Megumi threw her body against one of the cushioned seats and watched the girl binding some papers together. Suddenly, the girl's eyes rose to Megumi.

"And the hospital, sensei?"

Megumi bit her lip and had a blank expression for some seconds.

"Well, I am not going to work today. Yesterday was a very tough one…" she remembered of the painful moments and she wished to know what had happened to that young mother.

" I see…"

It was impossible not to notice the girl seemed to be very ashamed. And Megumi could _guess_ why.

"What's wrong, Saeko-chan? How are your mom and brothers?"

Saeko blinked several times and smiled shyly once again. "Oh, nothing, sensei! Mother and brothers are doing fine."

She wouldn't ask. Megumi leaned forward on her seat and locked her eyes on the girl right there behind the desk.

"I suppose you found something strange this morning between Aoshi-san and I."

The girl didn't answer, her shyness wouldn't allow it but the doctor knew she was pretty curious.

Megumi sighed, "We are married."

Saeko's eyes rounded after the statement and she closed them for a short while.

"I know it sounds crazy but we have to keep some things of our lives in private mainly because of Aoshi's absence and traveling. We had to keep this private for a while."

The girl rose her eyes and walked to Megumi. She bowed respectfully.

"Congratulations on you two, Takani-sensei."

Megumi smiled. "Thanks"

But Saeko seemed to be out of place. She walked to the desk and grabbed her belongings. Megumi just watched in curiosity.

"Takani-sensei, everything's done. If you excused me now, I'd like to go home." She bowed one again.

"Wouldn't you like to have lunch first?"

"I thank and apologize but I still have to sew Shuuichi's clothes before the end of the afternoon."

Megumi could not see her eyes, her bangs veiled them and the long braid was fallen over her shoulder.

"Sure. Send my regards to your mom. I'll be visiting her soon to check on her knee."

"Thank you."

Saeko turned around and opened the waiting room door. A lean figure was just coming that way. She didn't close it again for she guessed the tall handsome man would go inside. She walked past him and bowed "Shinomori-sensei" before rushing and disappearing down the lane.

The girl walked the streets as fast as she could and as fast as that kimono would allow. She had lied to the sensei, she didn't have anything to sew before the end of the afternoon. So, the scene she had witnessed some days ago was not craziness. That hug… it was suspicious and right that morning, Takani-sensei had kissed Shinomori-sensei. They were married. Married. Lucky Takani-sensei. Lucky.

When she paid attention on the outside again, she was she was already few steps away from her house. The boys were playing outside and her mother was sat under the shadow of a tree.

"Saeko-chan, Saeko-chan!" Masanobu came running to her.

Saeko meekly smiled at him and at Shuuichi who was running right after his brother. Both boys held their sister.

"Come and play with us, Saeko-chan."

The girl walked to the house entrance and she realized her mother's eyes on her.

"Takani-sensei sent you her regards and told she's coming here soon to check your knee, mother."

Takakura-san smiled and watched her daughter enter the house.

"Saeko-chan…" the boys were moping.

Saeko turned to them and smiled.

"Sister is tired, cannot play with you today."

The house was empty and gloomy. Saeko entered her room and untied her kimono. She sat on the futon and gazed herself reflected on the mirror.

"Lucky woman she is…"

Somehow, she deserved. Takani Megumi was the best woman she knew. She was kind, giving, loving and extremely capable as a doctor. She had always been alone and it was fair she'd have someone like Shinomori-sensei to watch over her.

"Shinomori-sensei…" Saeko turned her back to the mirror and laid on her belly on the futon. "I'd never have a chance, would I ?" she sighed and fought a tear. "Shinomori-sensei."

XxX

After lunch, Megumi bathed and dressed up. She walked to the main room and saw Aoshi analyzing some papers. She grabbed her purse and walked to the door. The man rose his eyes from the paper and watched her movements. Realizing that, Megumi looked at him with the corner of her eyes.

"To the Himuras'" she said without any previous question from him.

Megumi walked to the door and when she was about to close it, she saw Aoshi had stood up and was already halfway to the door.

"Wait. I am going with you." his voice was deep and imperative.

Megumi didn't mind he was there following her as a shadow. She just tried to keep her pace ahead knowing that if he wanted to, he could catch up and surpass her any time.

There was the familiar scene at the dojo grounds: Kenshin doing the laundry and Kenji running after him. The ex-samurai had noticed the presence of the visitors and his trademark smile was pasted on his face from the moment they could see him. Kenji seemed very glad to see Megumi and ran to her.

"Auntie!" the little boy attached himself to the doctor's leg and it made her smile.

"Hello, Kenji-kun!" the boy's eyes shifted to Aoshi and he hid himself from the onmitsu.

Megumi crouched and offered her arms. The boy accepted with great joy and she lifted him. He held her neck and laid a small kiss on her cheek.

Aoshi merely watched that scene. Megumi really had a lot going with children. On the other hand, the only child that was able to go near him was Misao. The two-year-old boy was now into Megumi's arms.

"Isn't he heavy?" Aoshi asked.

Megumi shot him an annoyed look and Kenji, a disturbed one.

"No, he isn't. No need for your concern." Normally, the little boy would just stick his tongue but he didn't dare doing that to Aoshi.

Kenshin had left the laundry and walked to them.

"What a great surprise having Megumi-dono and Aoshi-san here on such a bright afternoon."

Megumi beamed.

"Hello Ken-san! I see you and Kenji are doing fine, aren't you, little one?" she cuddled Kenji and he laughed.

Kenshin smiled more and more.

"Megumi is free from the hospital today." Aoshi stated "so, she decided to come here and pay you a visit."

"It was very good. We missed you!" a female voice spoke behind their back.

"Kaoru!"

Megumi smiled and the younger woman smiled back. Kenji almost jumped from Megumi's arms. Then, Megumi placed him on the floor and he ran to his mother. Kaoru was dressing her fighting clothes and she had just dismissed her students. Many boys walked past them, bowing deeply and eyeing the visitor. As usual, Aoshi was the one to draw curious hidden looks.

"Let's enter, get together and have some tea." That was Yahiko.

"Sake!" Sanosuke showed up grinning but his grin disappeared once he laid his eyes on Aoshi. He was holding two bottles of the alcoholic beverage.

Everybody entered the house and sat by the low table. Megumi and Kaoru seemed to have thousand things to talk about in a girlish way. Aoshi and Kenshin exchanged some words, mainly about someone Kenshin wanted to know the whereabouts.

"I heard it this morning. That person is coming back in a month or so."

Kenshin smiled.

"Somehow, I get glad he's safe."

"He was never really your enemy, was he?"

"The same way you once were and the same way you are now."

That sentence made Aoshi silent. He knew it was not Kenshin's intention to let him that way but he couldn't help the shame he felt for his past acts.

Sanosuke came from the kitchen with small cups and the two bottles he was carrying before. He placed the cups in front of everybody but Aoshi.

"I know you don't drink." He remarked.

Then, he got the sake and poured down a bit for Yahiko, Kaoru, Kenshin and when he was about to pour some to Megumi, Aoshi's voice could be heard.

"She can't have it, Sagara."

All of them looked at Aoshi who still had that impassive face of his. Sanosuke stopped pouring sake into her cup but it seemed he had been frozen in the act.

"What?"

Aoshi realized the death glare Megumi shot him but it didn't keep him from looking cold and aloof.

"I suppose it's not good for a woman on her condition to drink alcohol." Aoshi was the one that could make it sound as if it were the plainer thing in the world.

That time Megumi felt like dying. Four pairs of eyes were laid on her and she felt like sinking. Not that they didn't know about her pregnancy, all of them knew it, except Yahiko, she suspected. But she could never imagine Aoshi would be so talkative. Her face burned both from anger and shame. Megumi breathed in many many times before being able to look around. Everybody's jaws were dropped for they didn't know Aoshi had already knew the fact they were going to have a baby. Plus, she guessed they didn't think he'd react as _natural_ as if it were his **tenth** child

Yahiko was particularly shocked. It occurred that he had never suspected anything about Aoshi and Megumi's relationship.

"Y-yes… Shinomori-san is right… alcohol does no good to pregnant women." Megumi said in an extremely low voice that was pretty audible due the immense silence that hovered.

That time, Yahiko jumped over Sanosuke with that suggestive smirk on his lips. "You rooster-head! You finally managed to get to her, uh?"

Sanosuke breathed in and shook his head and didn't miss the opportunity to h it the boy's head. "You'd better ask someone else, you brat."

So, the four pair of eyes shifted to Aoshi. He opened his eyes and looked from over his teacup.

"Yes. Megumi and I are going to have a child."

Yahiko fell on his back. Sanosuke knew about everything but he couldn't hide his feelings and surprise. Kaoru smiled widely and clasped her hands together as if praying. Kenshin realized something out of Aoshi's tone: it was not that cold-pitched one; it had certain warmth, a certain pride everybody could have missed but him.

Having the brightest shade of red on her cheeks, Megumi stood up and ran outside. People were still too mesmerized to act but Kaoru stood up and followed her friend. She found the other woman standing by the well, looking down and fanning herself.

"Megumi! So, you finally told him!"

The young doctor glanced behind to see her friend in pure joy.

"Yes. Yesterday night."

"That's wonderful! And his reaction was very good as far as I can see!"

But Megumi's semblance was not as good as Kaoru expected it to be.

"What's wrong?"

Megumi bit her lip and faced the well for some seconds.

"Nothing really."

"So why this face? Aren't you happy with his reaction? Aren't you happy with your baby?"

"Yes. He asked me to marry him."

Kaoru's eyes almost fell from their orbs. "What? I mean, really?"

"I didn't accept it. So, he came up with the idea we should make-believe we are married until the child is born."

Kaoru was totally dumbfounded. "You didn't accept it… you…" her hand snapped her forehead and slid all over her face. "Are you crazy?"

Megumi frowned and turned immediately to answer her friend. "No, I am not! I don't want a man who does not marry me for me by my side, even if he's my child's father."

"But Megumi…"

"No. My decision has been taken a long time ago, since I decided to end up our secret relationship."

"But have you accepted to fake it?"

Megumi lingered on some seconds before nodding. "At least for a while, until things settle down."

She was stubborn. Too stubborn. Kaoru sighed and let the subject die there; anyway, Megumi and Aoshi would have some long months together before the birth.

The afternoon was getting yellow.

XxX

Kenshin approached the taller man dressed in black. The samurai smiled and the onmitsu nodded.

"Congratulations for your child, Aoshi-san."

"Thank you, Himura."

Kenshin looked heavenwards and crossed his arms behind his back.

"This unworthy one thinks you will make a great father."

Aoshi eyed the redheaded with curiosity.

"And a good husband to Megumi-dono."

That time, Aoshi's eyes narrowed. If only the other one knew Megumi had refused his proposal.

"She can be very stubborn. But there are things she does not give up even though it sounds like she wants to give up." Kenshin continued talking with that perfect smile on his lips.

Aoshi suspected Kenshin knew many things although they hadn't said a thing about it. The short one just stood there, looking at the fading afternoon with a smile on his face.

Suddenly, Sanosuke showed up and looked at Aoshi.

"You'd better get going or you'll end up here alone. Megumi just left." his voice was as monotone as Aoshi's own could ever be.

With that, Aoshi detached himself from a wall, waved goodbye to Kenshin and left the dojo. Yahiko and Sanosuke watched the onmitsu go away.

"So, Sano, he IS human…" Yahiko still sounded dumbfounded. " And he acts, you know, with… I mean, he remembered he had something on his body with another function than the usual one."

Sanosuke rolled his eyes heavenwards. Yahiko insisted, now with a devilish grin.

"Well, with a woman like that… everyone becomes human one day."

It was enough. Sanosuke hit Yahiko on the head once more. "Shut up, your brat!"

He walked slowly. He could reach the woman if he wanted to, but he knew she didn't want him around that time. So, his long strides became very slow and paused ones and he walked the streets with the hands on his pockets. Daylight was fading fast. According to his mental calculations, Megumi should have already arrived home. And then, he allowed himself to walk faster and he soon took sight of her house.

Aoshi opened the door and closed it behind him. His trained ears told him Megumi was locked up into her room. Chances were she didn't want to talk to him so he just let her be. He also walked to his room and locked himself inside. The handsome man changed into his obi gi and decided to do his job investigations due in one week earlier. He didn't want to leave Megumi alone but she'd be safe into her room. She was upset and it was certain she wouldn't leave it for a good while. So, Aoshi made sure to make some noise so that the doctor could know he was around. He got his two blades and left noiselessly through the window after reading the papers he had left behind before going to the dojo.

He really appreciated when his job required more than just sitting and giving orders. He loved action, it made him relax.

Megumi wouldn't leave her room if she had the chance to run into Aoshi inside her house. So, she lied down to sleep and she slept deeply into the night.

Aoshi arrived early in the morning. He suspected it should be around seven already. The onmitsu sneaked into the house absolutely noiselessly and headed to his room. The very moment he was passing in front of Megumi's door, she opened it. They looked at each other for some seconds. The doctor examined his clothes and saw he was carrying his sheathed kodachis on his right hand.

"I-I won't ask." She stated.

Aoshi only nodded and disappeared into the meditation room. It was pretty clear to him that her annoyance was toward him only.

XxXxXxX

Ooooooh… now things will flow faster. And then, what did you think of his reaction? And the rejection? When I first write things, I tell the story to a mate of mine that doesn't even know of anime existence but she got hooked on Aoshi anyway! I told her the title of the coming chapter would be "Rejection" and she almost cried. "Oh I can't believe he's doing this to her!" My sisters thought the same thing… but Aoshi is a sweetie, Meg is being very stubborn. My God, I don't even have a clue of how this is going to end up!

A great THANK YOU to all you guys who keep on following this story!


	34. Sights And Insights

Chapter XXXIV- Sights and Insights.

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: you already know it by heart…

XxXxXx

It was six in the morning when she left her room and walked to the hot springs. Her slender fingers worked on undressing her pale body from her light yukata. Her feet touched the water and for a second, her limbs relaxed when she made her whole body dive into the hot water. Once again, she was preparing herself to work. The day would most probably be a cold one but there was the dew scent from dawn everywhere and the air was light and pure, absolutely perfect to breathe.

Everyday now contained a wave of inner sadness early in the morning. Everyday. Saeko tried to take thoughts out of her mind and relax for a moment; anyway, she couldn't take long or she'd be late.

Everything was silent when she reentered her house. She walked silently, taking care not to wake up the children or her mother. Passing by the children's bedroom, the young woman smiled at the sight of the two boys sleeping as if they were little blessed creatures that came right out of heaven.

She had already prepared breakfast before taking her bath so, she returned to the kitchen just to eat before leaving. She could not give up easily, she was the only source of money her family had now and she had to fight off her pain because of them. During the last two weeks, she had thought of leaving her job many times. Not that her job was a bad one. On the contrary, she really loved what she was doing. Her employee, Takani Megumi, was a young but very capable doctor and she always admired her very much for everything she was. But… there was the sensei. Shinomori-sensei. He was the matter. Saeko didn't know how and when but she suddenly realized she had fallen in love with that handsome gloomy man and it seemed that it would not go away.

The young woman glanced over her sleeping family members and walked outside to make her way to the clinic.

She felt a great shame when Shinomori-sensei was near her and now she was much more ashamed of her feelings for he was a married man, he was married to her friend, Takani-sensei, the one that helped her when she needed the most. It was not fair with the lady doctor but she just couldn't help. She was young and naïve, she didn't know how to control her feelings yet.

She felt like leaving her job because of the shame she felt when looking at the doctor's eyes, for betraying her into her own house.

XxXxX

Three weeks had passed since Megumi had told him about her pregnancy.

Aoshi sat on the tatami with eyes closed, meditating. Everything around sounded peaceful and ease.

Since that day, Megumi had been annoyed and she was not speaking to him unless they were among people. Perhaps she was angry or it was only because of her pregnancy. He heard pregnant women had odd mood changes all the time.

When they were among people, she was the old Megumi again, teasing him and trying to make him feel uncomfortable, like calling him husband. But once they were left alone, she'd just lock herself into her room or go into the clinic for work.

Aoshi had informed people at Kyoto he'd take long to go back but that they didn't need to worry about it. Nevertheless, he was thinking of visiting them in one month or so and he was planning on taking Megumi with him to tell them about the news. He hadn't written anything about Megumi's pregnancy to anybody but he surely informed Okina he was staying at her place for she needed some assistance.

Two hours after he had woken up, Aoshi decided to leave the meditation room and have some tea. Saeko would probably be arriving soon but he could listen Megumi was already awaken for the noises coming from her bedroom.

Another ordinary day was beginning. Aoshi prepared breakfast really quickly. He had gotten used in preparing breakfast for him and Megumi every morning and the cooking skills he already had only got better: he suspected he was cooking almost as well as Megumi. Almost.

Jasmine scent could be smelled all over the house now. Aoshi guessed Megumi was about to leave her bedroom, the last thing she usually puts on is perfume. In no time, he heard her soft steps on the hallway and soon she stood by the kitchen's door.

"Good morning." She greeted.

"Good morning." He repeated.

At first, Aoshi didn't turn around, he was too busy cutting tofu into small morsels. When he finished his task, he turned around to place the bowl on the table and he finally laid his eyes on the lady doctor. He frowned and analyzed her from top to bottom. Realizing his curious look, the doctor spoke:

" Forgetting things, Okashira? Today is the first day of the conference with the western doctors."

Yes. He had forgotten the date but it was not his fault. As they rarely spoke unless they were amidst people, Megumi hadn't really said the date the conference would begin. He knew it'd take three days, he knew it be at the university but he really didn't know the date. He remembered Matsuyama-sensei had talked something about it when he hired her. But he didn't tell her anything, he'd not tell her it was her slip and not his.

"Fine." He answered. But still, he was amazed.

Megumi blushed when she realized what had caught his attention. Aoshi was standing as tough in a trance, staring at her.

"M-my clothes… I bought them yesterday, everyone is going to wear western clothes."

She was wearing a long black skirt with a lavender long-sleeved blouse. The white little buttons of the blouse were all closed and up; in the neck, there was a white pin. The sleeves were made out of a transparent fabric the same color of the rest of the blouse. Megumi had also tied half of her hair with a lavender pin and Aoshi could notice she was holding white gloves on the crook of her arm.

But there was something going on. He had never noticed it but looking closely and attentively with his well-trained eyes, he could see now there was something different. And that was why he seemed paralyzed.

The young doctor sighed and wrapped her arms around her body.

" You noticed it."

"Aa." He couldn't take his blue eyes from a spot on her body, a barely noticeable curve on the downer part of her belly. It was totally unnoticeable when she dressed a kimono or even a sleeping yukata but, if one paid too much attention, it could notice her pregnant belly under those tight western clothes.

" But I also bought a shawl. So, I'll wrap it around me, hold my breath and carry my suitcase. One has to have your onmitsu eyes to realize under all those disguises. Or know my body too well."

"Sure." Aoshi nodded, pretending he didn't get the nasty remark she had last made.

He tried to look normal again and turned his attention to the breakfast. It was done and now they'd have it. However, he couldn't help giving her hidden glances from under his black bangs.

After eating, a knock was heard on the door.

Aoshi stood up and walked to open it. Saeko.

"Good morning, Shinomori-sensei, Takani-sensei."

"Good morning." He answered.

Megumi waved from the hallway "Hello, dear!" and the lady doctor approached.

Saeko hadn't noticed her belly and it made her relieved. So, Aoshi was the only one who could notice it at first sight. Maybe she wouldn't have much trouble hiding it from her colleagues.

" Are you ready for today?"

"Yes!" she answered sounding excited, but noticing the tall man had left the two women alone.

" So, you know what to do. If you need physical help, Aoshi-san is staying here this morning, just call him and he'll come to you."

"Ok."

Megumi grabbed a white shawl that had been laying over a chair in the main room and her black suitcase.

"Take care. Bye, Saeko-chan."

"Bye, Takani-sensei."

Aoshi had suddenly materialized at the end of the hallway. Megumi looked at him for some seconds and their eyes met. So, she smiled to him, noticing he had a pure and beautiful sky blue shade into his eyes.

A carriage stopped right in front of the house that moment.

" They sent a carriage for me. Bye, Aoshi-san."

He just watched her go. It was surprising, he knew she was pregnant but he had never seen the shape of her belly.

Once the door was closed, Saeko walked to the clinic.

" Shinomori-sensei, I am already going to the clinic. Is it alright that I call thee if I need help?"

"Aa." He answered.

"Thank you." and she vanished through the door.

Saeko stood in the clinic without Megumi that day and she knew it'd be repeated for two more days while Megumi was at the medical conference. The assistant would only care for the minor injuries she already knew how to deal. The serious cases would be sent to Miksi Hospital, as Megumi had demanded.

Fortunately, nothing serious happened that morning and by eleven, Aoshi showed up.

" How are things going here?"

Saeko almost jumped, totally startled for she hadn't heard him come inside.

" Oh, everything's fine. Yes."

"Aa."

For her absolute amusement, the tall handsome man sat on one cushioned seats right there in the waiting room, quite in front of her own desk. He sat there with a cold and stoic expression, a coldness that could get to her and melt her somehow, the same way it could make her shiver and die with shame. The blue-eyed man was right there scrutinizing her. Saeko swallowed and smiled to him. He didn't smile. Then, it occurred to her that she had never seen him smile. Why? He was so handsome, he had a lovely wife, why the coldness? Wasn't he happy with his life?

" Pardon me, but you are nineteen, am I right?"

"Y-yes…" she tried not to look at him that time.

Silence. She raised her eyes just to see he was still there, looking at her face, examining her features.

" You… you look so much like someone I know. The same age, the same eyes, the same hair."

Saeko blushed heavily. She had to turn around and pretend she was getting something out of a drawer so that he wouldn't see the red shade on her cheeks.

" Thy younger sister, sensei?"

Aoshi narrowed his eyes for a second and glanced through the window. Many pedestrians were walking on that unusually chilly spring morning.

" I could say so. Misao, that's her name."

Saeko´s eyes widened for some seconds. He had already called her that name the day he had a high fever and she stood there to watch over him.

" Doesn't she live here in Tokyo?"

Aoshi turned his eyes to the girl and she swallowed. Maybe she had been inconvenient.

" I am sorry to ask, sensei, I didn't mean to disturb thee."

" No, no problem. She lives in Kyoto."

And he stood up. " But you're just physically alike, your personalities differ too much."

Saeko felt something strange. Would it be good or bad? Aoshi stayed the rest of the morning by the window, glancing outside but he was not interested in anything out there at least, it was what he let show. When it was time to go, Saeko lifted her body for her chair and walked to the door.

" May I close the clinic, sensei?"

Only then Aoshi took his eyes from the window and laid them on her.

"No, it's not necessary, I will do it myself. Good afternoon, Takakura Saeko."

" Good afternoon, Shinomori-sensei." Saeko bowed deeply and went outside. She noticed Aoshi observed her as she walked down the lane. Then, he came and closed the door.

Why did he have to do that to her? He had just scrutinized her and she felt naked in front of those blue eyes. If only he knew he should not play with his eyes on her like that. Saeko sighed and threw her long braid behind. Yet, she could not help smiling and feeling sad at the same moment. His face was right there before her eyes the whole path home.

The boys were outside, washing and hanging clothes out to dry. Saeko smiled to them and they smiled back.

"Mother?" she first asked when she entered home.

Her mother was doing better, she could now stand for some minutes. Takani-sensei had gone to their house last week and stated Takakura-san was recovering well and she'd soon be able to stand up alone.

"Here." The woman was standing by a window, her hands braced on the wall. She looked at her daughter for some seconds and said: " What's wrong? Why this face?"

Saeko smiled and shook her head.

"What face, mother?"

Her mother narrowed her eyes and turned to look outside. Saeko was hiding something. The girl immediately went to her bedroom and locked herself inside.

Saeko stood alone, her back leaned against the shoji door. Her feelings were not fair to the doctor. She thought she was only a dirty stupid girl for feeling such things for that man. And that very day he had talked to her, to _her,_ while they were alone. So, she looked like his younger sister. Misao, that was her name. Saeko wished she could bring him at least a good memory; but she could not nourish those feelings anymore. She had to be a good person, she had to be fair.

XxX

It was nightfall when Megumi stepped inside her house. She could swear it was empty if it were not for a dim light coming from the end of the corridor. She realized Aoshi was into her bedroom. She walked the hallway and stood by the door.

Megumi's jaw dropped when she saw that scene. Her drawers were open , there were some clothes on the bed, Aoshi was probably going to keep them for they had been outside do be washed and dry. But what really struck her with surprise was the onmitsu himself. He was sat on the bed, his back resting against its head, his eyes were closed and his breathing was calm. He was sleeping! And on his strong hands, the young doctor could picture linen clothes. White linen clothes she had bought back at Yokohama.

Her first will was to wake him up but she didn't want him to strike and she thought he was just handsome there. The woman also didn't sit on the bed not to disturb him. She merely took her clothes and kept them into the drawer, changed her clothes and spent some seconds smiling and looking at the handsome man right there on her bed. Megumi leaned against the wall and watched him, her eyes following each trace of his face, drawing his features. So disturbingly handsome.

When Megumi was all lost into her thoughts about him, Aoshi opened his eyes. He widened them for a second, maybe surprised for seeing Megumi watching him with that smile on her face.

Realizing he had finally woken up, her smile widened. " You slept well."

Aoshi eyed her suspiciously. It was the first time in weeks she was really talking to him in a friendly way and they were absolutely alone. He stood up and saw her stretched hand to him. She was asking for the baby robe he had been holding.

" I am sorry. I just found it… interesting…"

She smiled to him again. " No problem."

Only then he realized it should be late, Megumi was already wearing her sleeping yukata.

"Uh, good night, Megumi." He made his way to the door when her voice called him.

" Aoshi-san?"

He stopped, he was already outside, his hands on the door, about to close it.

" You are cute when you are sleeping." Then, she came quickly and pushed the door closed.

He shook his head. " Cute…"

XxX

Megumi walked down the streets to her house accompanied by Matsuyama-sensei and Sawanoguchi-san, the hospital administrator. They had insisted to walk her home or to go into a carriage but she refused both. She wanted to walk and the streets were full, so there was no danger for her to walk alone. It was only midday.

The two men stood near the hospital and she continued her way home. The medical conference was over, it had only happened until that morning.

She walked the streets peacefully and even happily. The doctor murmured a tune to herself. Suddenly, she winced. A shadow. There was a shadow she was sure. Megumi turned around and watched her surroundings. There were too many people around, anybody could have passed by her. Yet, she felt there were eyes on her. She hurried her steps and she thanked the loose western skirt for that.

Her heart pumped and the heat started to affect her. She started felling dizzy and disturbed. Yes, she could feel a pair of eyes on her, scrutinizing. She only didn't know where they came from. Once again, she stopped and looked around. Too many unknown faces. It was best to run. But if she'd run, it'd look suspicious. So, the doctor continued walking fast, walking as fast as she could. When she finally saw her house, she begun to run. She ran fast, a hand over her belly, eyes closed, trying to forget the heat and the dizziness. When she opened her eyes again, she knew she was by her house. The smell coming from the garden was unique. The clinic door was still opened and she went running through it.

A shriek got to her ears and she recognized it as Saeko's. The girl had jumped from her chair and was braced against the wall, her eyes very wide. Almost instantly, Megumi heard a door open and a tall man came out of the blue.

"Aoshi-san!"

Aoshi's eyes laid on her. She was panting and pink. Her shawl was fallen on the floor with her medicine box and her hand was over her belly.

"What's happening?" he asked in a serious tone.

Megumi could not answer, she was trying to breathe. He took her arm and made her sit. Then, his eyes shifted to Saeko who was still pretty scared.

" I-I don't know, Shinomori-sensei. She just came in running!"

"Saeko, close the clinic. I am taking her inside."

As Megumi seemed paralyzed, Aoshi had to take her in his arms. Saeko watched them go into the house once again and she hurried to close the doors.

Inside, Aoshi placed Megumi on the bed. Her eyes were now closed, squeezed as if in pain. Immediately, his strong hands went to the collar of her blouse and unbuttoned it up to the middle of her chest so she could breathe easier. He also took it from into her skirt so it wouldn't press her too much.

He watched her breathing deeper and deeper until she opened her eyes.

" I am so dizzy…"

"What happened?" He asked again.

She looked at him, sat by her side on the bed. She narrowed her eyes a lot, until they were mere dark slits.

" I don't know… but I felt there was someone following me. I felt strange and began to feel nervous…" she stopped to breathe again "and I started running, so I went breathless and confused and afraid."

Aoshi looked at her.

" Cover yourself. The girl is coming inside."

Saeko's timid and hesitant steps could be heard only by him. Aoshi walked to the doorway and met the girl.

" Her shawl and her medicine box, Shinomori-sensei."

"Would you please place them into her room? Megumi is there. Would you please stay with her for a moment? I will not take long."

"Sure, sensei!" and the girl hurried inside.

Megumi was on the bed, covered by a thin sheet.

" Are you feeling bad, Takani-sensei?"

"No, dear… it must have been the heat."

Saeko's eyes went on the surroundings. She had never entered Takani-sensei's bedroom. It amazed her she had a western bed, such a beautiful and fine item. She kept on standing by the wall, trying not to stare at the sensei. Little by little, the sensei regained her usual pale color and soon, she sat on the bed.

Saeko blushed for an unknown reason when Megumi smiled at her.

" I am sorry if I worried you, it is nothing really. By the way, where is Aoshi-san?"

"He left. Takani-sensei, maybe it is not the proper time, but… there is something I wanted to talk to you." She felt it was not the right time at all, but things were just unbearable now.

Megumi realized the girl was squeezing the hem of her cuffs.

"Yes. We can talk."

The girl's eyes lowered and she gasped:

" I can no loner work here."

Megumi's eyes widened in surprise. "What? Why?"

" I do not deserve it, Takani-sensei, I don't. I failed you, I am awfully sorry. I didn't want to fail you but I did."

Megumi didn't understand. She was completely bewildered.

"Wait, Saeko. Be more specific. I cannot understand you."

"Oh, sensei, it is so difficult for me. So difficult. I've carried a burden and I did everything to get rid of it but I couldn't. After today, I know I will never have your trust again but I needed to do this or I wouldn't be able to sleep at night anymore."

Megumi's eyes widened more and more. So why would she be so angry with her? She couldn't recall any situation in which Saeko had failed her or acted wrong. Se could tell the girl was nervous. She could not look Megumi in the eye, she could not raise her face. Her beautiful fingers were twisting the fabric of her dark green kimono.

" I am sorry but I could not help." In a desperate way, both her hands covered her face and her voice sounded muffled. "I feel for Shinomori-sensei. I know it is wrong, that is why I am asking to leave the job here. I promise I will never come here again and that I will disappear from your sight, Takani-sensei. I just wanted you to forgive me one day for feeling this."

Megumi's jaw dropped. She left the bed and walked to Saeko. Only then, the girl looked at her, totally in fear. She squeezed her eyes and coiled her body against the wall when she saw Megumi's hand coming near her face. But, instead of doing anything to harm, both her arms were placed around Saeko and she held the girl.

" This is not a reason to leave work when you need and love it, Saeko-chan." Megumi's voice was warm and comforting.

Saeko shook her head and coiled her body into the other woman's embrace. " But, Takani-sensei… I've just told you I have feelings for your husband!"

Megumi smiled sadly. Husband. It was clear, the news had shocked her but she couldn't just let that girl like that. So, she had to sound ease and natural.

" As I told you, it is not a reason. You'll continue working here. There's nothing shameful in having feelings, Saeko-chan, I know it better."

" But I never tried anything, I would never do it, sensei! I swear, I respect you above all things." The girl sounded desperate.

" I know, I know." Megumi patted her head.

" Shinomori-sensei loves and worries about you a lot, he has no eyes to anybody else in this world." She cried.

Megumi smiled fondly at her. " You'll have someone devoted to you, Saeko-chan."

That time, Aoshi showed up at the bedroom door. Megumi shifted her eyes to him and she released Saeko. The girl looked up and saw the handsome face of Aoshi and she tried to recompose herself quickly.

" So, I am waiting for you here tomorrow, right? I am sure we'll have a lot to do." The doctor smiled fondly at the girl standing between her and Aoshi.

Saeko bowed to both of them and waved goodbye.

" Sure, Takani-sensei. I-I guess I never told you, but I dream to be just like you someday! Good bye!"

Megumi spent several seconds frozen, smiling to the door. Aoshi looked at her with a small curiosity into his eyes.

"I didn't find anybody around, Megumi." He finally stated after watching Megumi with attention.

"Uh… let it be, Aoshi-san. Maybe I just imagined things. Maybe it was the heat. Oh, I am so foolish!" She looked at him for some seconds and laughed.

" I brought lunch. Since you look better, aren't you willing to eat?" Aoshi decided to drop the subject but he still wanted to be aware of what could be happening.

" Oh, yes… let me just change into a yukata first.

Aoshi left to the kitchen so Megumi could be alone into her room to change her clothes.

" _Shinomori-sensei loves and worries about you a lot, he has no eyes to anybody else in this world."_

Megumi smiled sadly at the remembrance. Saeko didn't know that iceman. He surely had no eyes for anybody else in the world, as he didn't have for her, right the opposite of what Saeko thought. He had eyes to nobody. Iceman. It was easy to fall for him, she didn't blame the girl. He was too handsome, too mysterious, too attracting, too strong; he could make a woman feel totally protected with just a glance of those enchanting blue eyes. Hadn't she herself fallen for him years ago? But Saeko didn't know how cold and distant he could be, how dangerous he could be and the fear he could cause. Saeko didn't know him before, she had never seen the Okashira as she had already seen. Yet, Megumi couldn't help, she had fallen and she was decided to embrace him, even if it would be from afar, she would get rid of the fear, it was only a momentary thing and she would embrace him somehow.

At the kitchen, Aoshi was just waiting for Megumi. They both ate silently until the woman spoke.

" What do you think of Saeko-chan, Aoshi-san?"

Aoshi opened his eyes and stared at Megumi for several seconds.

"Why do you ask?"

Megumi bit her lip and placed her chopsticks aside. Should she tell him?

" Well, I just found out she has feelings for you."

Aoshi sighed. Megumi was just being jealous and picking on the girl.

"Megumi…"

" I know what you will say. But listen to what I am telling you because I heard it straight from the horse's mouth."

Aoshi raised both brows and turned to his food again. Megumi, on the other hand, didn't turn to eat. Instead, she braced both elbows on the table and shot Aoshi inquiring looks. Aoshi ate peacefully for some seconds but he knew she wouldn't give up as long as he hadn't said what she wanted. He sighed once more and looked at her.

"What?"

She smiled impishly " You haven't told me your opinion about Saeko-chan yet."

He calmly chewed his meal for some seconds, letting her waiting with the impish smile fading fast from her face.

" She reminds me of Misao."

Megumi widened her eyes. " Misao. Is that all? What specifically?"

" Nothing specifically. She is shy and quiet. They are just alike physically. The eyes, the hair, the age. That is all."

Megumi looked at him for some seconds with suspicious eyes. Aoshi thought she was trying to scrutinize him. " Jealous?" he teased in his usual serious and uninterested way.

She laughed her kitsune's laugh.

" Me? Jealous? Hahahahahah! Come on, Aoshi! I know you, Iceman."

"Iceman, what a thing… " he thought but said nothing.

" You, you" she changed her tone into a rather sad one. " You don't have a place at heart."

"Ok, she wants to play" he thought.

" You don't …"

" Really?" his voice cut in.

Megumi looked at him, he was now standing, one brow arched in defy. " Don't be so sure of that."

For her biggest amusement, he passed by her, tapped her shoulder and left.

Megumi was left fuming. "Aoshi, that fool!" Her will was to go after him and ask him who was that special person at his heart. It wasn't her, so it could only be Misao… or someone else she didn't know. But… maybe he was teasing her… who knows. O, Aoshi wouldn't play with that. Would he?

At the porch, Aoshi looked around to see if there was anything suspicious. He could see Megumi's face right now, she should be swearing him. He would never tell her, but it was even fun beating her at her teasing game.

XxXxXxX

Secondary character playing a rather big role in here. Saeko. I don't know why but I like her…

Another thing: it was nice when I thought of Aoshi discovering Megumi's belly! BEWARE: Cute scene next chapter!


	35. A Smile, A Touch And A Promise

Chapter XXXV- A Smile, A Touch And A Promise.

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: I never had and never will have any right on Rurouni Kenshin's characters, you know dear, so, don't waist your time thinking otherwise.

XxXxXx

The rain was falling calmly outside.

It was mid afternoon but the gray sky made everything darker. The smell of wet soil was strong and everything was calm. There was nothing but the pure and intermittent noise of the rain.

Aoshi glanced through the window and let out a breath. He surely enjoyed rainy spring days so he could feel peace and ease through nature. The house was now silent since Megumi had left to the hospital. She had been singing the music box tune for two days and it took him some concentration not to have it on his mind for days as well. Besides everything, she had been talkative and cheerful, not even a shadow of the silent, restrained and distant Megumi had remained. Somehow, he appreciated her behavior lately, she was her old self again. He had many times felt guilty for imputing sorrow and fear into her life when they were at Kanryuu's and since they started seeing each other but now, in a couple of weeks, she had become the glad, warm and outgoing Megumi again.

The rain also made him think of the ones he had left at Kyoto. Aoshi missed them, mainly the old man and Misao. One month ago, he had thought of visiting them and taking Megumi with him but things were not so easy now, maybe they would have to wait until the baby was born for Aoshi was not taking the possibility of traveling and letting Megumi alone for many days. He imagined what Okina would probably say once he told the news. But Misao… he knew it would be hard for her but he also wanted her to understand. Above all, Misao was extremely fond of children and she would most probably melt once she put her eyes on the baby. Yet, he undoubtedly missed them. If only Kyoto was nearer and he didn't have to be absent for too long…

Horses were heard galloping down the lane and soon a carriage stopped. His ears identified steps on the porch and the moment later, the door was open.

" Ouch! I am soaked to the bones!" Megumi's voice echoed in the silent house.

Aoshi had already stood up and left the meditation room, he was in the middle of the hallway when Megumi entered running and undressing her smock.

" Oh, I thought you were not here, Aoshi-san." She smiled to him in surprise, setting her suitcase on the floor.

" I've been here for the whole afternoon. I just thought it would be better if I sent a carriage to bring you back home." He approached her and took her suitcase.

"Thank you. By the way, this rain is really insisting. It started early in the afternoon and it keeps on falling."

Now, she had passed by him and entered the kitchen to fetch her hot water for a bath. Aoshi came right after her.

" Go and undress these wet clothes. I will take care of things here."

Megumi did as he told her and she was soon back at the kitchen to retrieve the water and pour it into the bathtub.

As his opposite, the doctor didn't seem lo enjoy rainy afternoons. After her bath, she just went to the main room and sat by Aoshi's side, near the window. It was too dark now and light was coming from the houses. The onmitsu was still glancing the dark sky and the falling rain. She looked at him for some seconds before speaking.

" Rainy afternoons are boring."

Aoshi shot her a quick glance but said nothing.

" Rain is amazing at night tough. It gives me too much joy to sleep listening to the rain on the roof." She completed.

"Aa." He agreed.

Suddenly, Megumi smiled and looked at him.

" Anaki-san has been asking about you lately." She smirked.

Anaki-san was the old woman who lived right beside their house. She was not a bad person, only a too curious widow.

Aoshi lifted one fine brow. Megumi giggled.

" Is that tall handsome patient still at your house, Takani-sensei?" she mocked the old woman's voice. " That's what she asked me a week ago. There were ages since I had last seen her."

" And what did you tell her?" he asked, not that he was really interested in Anaki-san's gossips and speculations.

" 'Oh, my husband?' that's what I told her. ' Surely, Anaki-san. Why?' " I tried sounding really surprised and solicitous." Megumi giggled more.

"Megumi…"

" That **was** my intention. The old lady got so surprised she got paralyzed and said nothing anymore. The other day, the whole neighborhood knew we were married."

Aoshi sighed but Megumi was having too much fun with that.

" I even provided her more information later, I said to her we had gotten married last year but we had to keep it secret for a while since you still had to be relocated here in Tokyo; but don't worry, I said nothing confidential about your job, Okashira."

" Well, that was the fastest way of spreading the news." He stated without taking his eyes from the outside.

Megumi had gotten somehow annoyed he wouldn't pay attention at anything but the weather outside, so she decided to go to sleep earlier that night. She was really tired and sleepy, nonetheless. But before going, she stood up and went near him. Aoshi accompanied her movements with the corner of his eyes; he watched her coming and saying louder than necessary.

" Good night, anata."

Then, she crouched and brushed her lips on his for some seconds.

Aoshi frowned and looked at her, visibly confused by the kiss and her words. So, Megumi bowed and whispered.

" Anaki-san's been watching us for minutes now." And she left after blinking one eye at him.

It was true. When Aoshi turned his head once again to glace through the window, he noticed the old woman vanishing for her window. Not that he hadn't realized her before, he knew she had been standing there for exact twenty two minutes she surely didn't hear anything else than what Megumi wanted her to hear and now she should be mortified for the giant display of love. Well, thinking coldly, they were into their house and they were 'married' so, if the old woman had gotten offended by the kiss, it was because she had been spying on the neighbors. After that, knowing old people (different from Okina of course), he knew that she would think twice before spying on them again. Megumi was cunning and crafty after all.

xXx

Aoshi still spent some more hours looking outside thoughtfully. There was a month since he had been watching around the house and watching over Megumi since she sensed eyes over her on the way back from the conference. From that day on, Aoshi didn't let her walk alone anymore, or at least, he would accompany her from afar, always paying heed to the surroundings. But a month had passed and he had seen nothing strange and Megumi herself assured him nothing out of routine had ever happened and that she thought it was just her mind playing tricks on her. Maybe he was starting to consider it now.

His strong hand grabbed the lantern and he walked to his room but he decided first to check on her and see if she was already sleeping. He silently entered her room and took the light a bit nearer her figure.

" Did you come to claim one more kiss?" she opened one eye and said impishly.

Aoshi shook his head in disapproval. " Checking if you were fine. By the way, I though you were long sleeping."

She sat on the bed and eyes him for a second. Then, she stood up and came his direction.

" Hum… my mood changed."

Aoshi didn't find those mood changes strange now. Megumi had many of them recently and she could alternate euphoria and sadness easily. Now, he guessed she was just too flirtatious.

" You know, it is not that bad to kiss you, Aoshi. I would kiss you again if you stayed for tonight but you are not staying." She smirked and walked closer and closer.

It was the same flirting Megumi again. Aoshi noticed her thin yukata, white as snow, made of such a thin fabric. Thin and revealing.

She was dangerously close and her hands came to his nape.

"Admit it, you want another kiss." She blinked and giggled.

But Aoshi was surprised. Her body was now too close, touching his and he felt it. She was still speaking but he could no longer understand, there was only a disconnected sound coming from her mouth. And the second after, he saw her pinkish lips come to his and she kissed him. He felt his heart jump and he couldn't correspond her in the kiss. His mind was blurry and confused, trying to catch too much in such a little period of time.

Suddenly, Megumi parted from him and mopped, walking away.

" Well, I take back my words. It **is** bad kissing you, Shinomori." She let go a breath that made her feathery bangs fly and come down again.

The doctor returned to the bed and sat down on the mattress. Her dark eyes surveyed Aoshi's figure for several long minutes. He seemed to be frozen, his eyes were stuck in an unidentified point and his mouth still had the faint shade of her lipstick.

" Come on, I was not talking serious." She giggled. "It is too bad to kiss you when you don't kiss me back. I am sorry for doing that again with no purpose! I swear I will never do it again." She blinked and kissed her crossed fingers

But he was still too strange. Suddenly, he seemed to have gone out of trance and walked to the door. Before closing it, under Megumi's curious and amused look, he turned around and she saw he was as cold as usual.

" Tell me something, Megumi. Five months, am I right?"

She smiled fondly at him.

" Yes. Even a bit more."

So, he told her good night and left her there.

Megumi shook her head and found funny Aoshi's thoughts about her pregnancy.

xXx

He walked calmly to his room. There, he changed into a sleeping yukata and put out the light.

Aoshi sprawled himself on the futon, lying on his back. He spent many minutes with eyes closed, paying attention to the rain falling outside. Then, he opened his eyes and ran them all over the dark room. He felt darkness embracing him and his fingers closed around the sheets.

" Five months already." He mused.

Aoshi started to remember that sensation again. He could see the scene being painted in the darkness right there on the ceiling. Megumi jumped from the bed and came near him. He could see. The thin and revealing sleeping yukata of hers was now sticking more to her belly and it revealed the round form in a way he had never seen. And he felt it when she came closer, he felt it against his own body when she came to kiss him. Their bodies had always fitted but that time, he could feel her belly before anything. His child was there. Aoshi closed his eyes and felt himself like in the middle of a hurricane. Yes, those were feelings, they were coming and swirling inside his chest and he felt warm. There was something coming right from his stomach and spreading through his body, making his limbs relax and making his mind go blank. He only thought of the sight of her belly and the way he felt it.

He was feeling. And that could be called happiness. He was feeling happy; happy as he had never felt in his whole life. Aoshi had a will of holding life and everything that would fit into his embrace. And an explosion seemed to come from the inside, mixed with the nice smell of rain and the calm rhythm of the falling rain. He could not fight it anymore and he absolutely had no will of doing that anymore. His face felt warm and cold at the same time.

And the thing he expected the most in his life happened. His lips curved into a smile. A pure smile. The one that came from the very depth of his soul. The one he thought that had been lost forever. The pure smile he had seen on many lips in unique moments. The one he thought he was too doomed and impure to have. A smile. His first smile.

It hurt. He was so happy it hurt. Anyway, it felt like magic.

XxXxX

Megumi had noticed Aoshi was different these days. She could not tell exactly why or what made him different, but there was something to do with the eyes. He had also been watching her more frequently; sometimes she would just get him off guard, staring at her for some long seconds. She would smile then and he'd look away.

Life was so peaceful. Nobody really knew of her pregnancy but her friends and she was not intending to announce it until it was time for the baby to be born. And she could say it was good living with Aoshi. He was caring and nice all the time. Not talkative, of course, but it was much better than being alone. She felt nice for having someone to take care of her.

Talking about him, he had just left while she was outside in the back yard taking care of her small garden. It really pleased her dealing with the plants at the last days of spring and the very first days of summer. It could make her relax and even tire her a bit so she could sleep better at night.

The other recent highlight was Kenshin's birthday party two days ago and it was a nice opportunity to see her friends and have fun. There, she also heard that man was back to Tokyo for one month now, Saitou Hajime.

Aoshi had behaved coolly at the Himura's dojo, but she could feel his eyes on her every time. Somehow, it made her glad he would even approach and ask her if everything was all right. Kaoru was very surprised and astonished; she mentioned she could never expect all that attention coming from Aoshi and that he was even lovely in his own way.

Only Sanosuke seemed out a bit far away, he seemed to be willing to run from her and she could guess why. It was a pity she didn't feel anything than friendship for him and that he hadn't forgotten his feelings towards her.

XxXx

Aoshi walked the streets knowing where to go. He remembered he and Megumi had walked that way a couple of months ago and he knew he could find what he wanted. After some minute-walk, he finally saw a yellowish building at a corner. Aoshi came its way and entered it and he certified himself that the smell of wood was still intense in there. Just like in his memories, an old woman came his way. She smiled at him and then widened her eyes at his sight.

" Sir… I think we've met before…"

Aoshi nodded after glancing all around him. " Yes. I came here a couple of months ago and bought a double bed."

The old woman looked at his face for a little while and smiled again. " Oh yes, that iron one, a very beautiful leaden-color bed, for sure."

Aoshi nodded. He looked farther and once again, he allowed himself to be led by his memories. He could almost see Megumi that day, detaching from them and going to another direction. That day, he did not guess, he did not know but she was already expecting. Aoshi trailed her imaginary steps to a white wood cradle. Into his mind, she was sliding her fingers on the wood and touching the mattress. He did the same.

The old woman came closer once again. " I remember your young wife liked this cradle."

"Aa." His look was vague, still lost into his memories. Shortly after, his body stiffened and he turned to the young woman.

"I am buying it."

His sentence made her beam. He followed the woman to the counter and there he paid a considerable sum of money. Later on, he heard people usually fell for the cradle but none of them were willing to pay its price.

" You surely do things to please your young wife, sir."

Aoshi just nodded. The woman said they would deliver the cradle at the end of the afternoon and Aoshi left. Megumi would probably get surprised and happy with the cradle. He still had some more things to do before returning home and he continued his way on the streets that were getting emptier as the sun sank in the horizon.

XxXx

She had just taken a relaxing bath after dealing for so long with earth and plants. Aoshi hadn't returned yet but it didn't really worry her; he surely knew how to take care of himself. At the very end of the afternoon, someone came to her house and knocked on the door. Megumi rushed to answer it and there she saw two unfamiliar men.

" Takani Megumi, aren't you? We are here to deliver this."

Megumi looked beyond the two men and saw a large thing wrapped in dark paper.

" Deliver here? I am sorry but I didn't buy anything, it may be another Takani Megumi."

If only her surname were usual around there… one of the men checked a paper with her address and name and she confirmed it was indeed there.

" But I can assure I didn't buy anything!" she protested.

The men looked the paper once more and ran their eyes over it. " Shinomori Aoshi." One of them said.

Megumi frowned.

" Shinomori Aoshi. He was the one who bought this and asked it to be delivered here. Do you know any Shinomori Aoshi, don't you, ma'am?"

Megumi let go a breath. " Yes, I do know Shinomori Aoshi. Come inside, then."

Megumi stepped back so the two men could carry the package inside. Once into her main room, one of them spoke:

" Where should we join it together, ma'am?"

Megumi didn't have a clue of what that thing was. What was Aoshi buying on the street anyway?

" Hum… depends on what it is."

The other man spoke: " A cradle. Where should we put it?"

Megumi widened her eyes in surprise. " A cradle?" at the men's nod, she decided to lead them on the guest room. She opened the door and told them in. " You can work on it here, please."

Megumi left the two men working and stood on the hallway. " Aoshi…"

It was nightfall when the two men left and she entered the room. The white little cradle she had once seen was there into her house. She didn't know what to feel. The woman got closer to the cradle and smiled, her fingers sliding over the wood lightly and her look lost on the little mattress. An idea came to her mind and she ran to her bedroom. Into the drawers, she found a transparent box containing a fluffy teddy bear. Returning to the other room, Megumi carefully placed the box on the little mattress and gazed at it for long long whiles.

" I appreciate you liked it." a deep male voice echoed on her ears.

Megumi jumped, absolutely startled.

" Aoshi-san… I- I hadn't seen you there, here… uh…"

" I arrived some minutes ago."

He turned on his heels to go elsewhere into the house. Megumi gazed his tall figure and smiled.

" Aoshi-san."

He turned his head.

"Thank you."

He nodded and proceeded on his way.

That very night, right after dinner, Megumi had decided to bathe and Aoshi spent his time on reading. He had heard she had now gone to her room and he continued reading. The house was very silent and he guessed Megumi must had gone to sleep. Through the window, he saw many neighbor houses were now in slumber, some others were full of light and he could hear a woman mumbling a song not that far away. He let go a breath and closed his eyes as a soft breeze played with his bangs on that hot summer night.

"Oh, Kami!"

That exclamation made him open his eyes and narrow them. It was Megumi. She sounded too surprised and almost breathless. Aoshi stood up the same second and walked to her room.

The door was open and Megumi was sat on the edge of the bed. Aoshi saw her wide eyes and her open mouth. Something had happened.

" Megumi, what is happening?" he said as he approached her and his eyes surveyed the room trying to catch something suspicious.

The woman was paralyzed. Her look was half distant and her hands were on her belly. Aoshi came near her and analyzed her for a while right after going to the window and checking it.

" Megumi." he called her once again.

She blinked a couple of times and laughed. Aoshi kept his eyes on her, totally confused.

" It moved!" she looked at him, blushing, smiling and with her eyes filled with tears.

By the position of her hands, Aoshi guessed she was speaking of the baby.

"Aa. It was time." He said and would make his way back to his reading when her hand held his one back.

He looked at her face and understood she wanted him to stay; her expression was confusing, to him she seemed so far away, so absorbed into herself. He stepped back and sat by her side on the bed. Megumi looked at him and smiled.

Minutes went by, as Megumi seemed paralyzed. She let go of his hand but he remained there anyway. Suddenly, she stood up and walked some steps away from the bed. Her facial expression changed and she was more serious now but Aoshi couldn't see it for she had her back to him. Her hand went to the edges of her lavender sleeping yukata and made them slide on her shoulders.

" Excuse me." Aoshi said and started to walk out from her bedroom.

" No, wait." She replied.

Aoshi didn't dare looking back. Megumi made her yukata slip to the very lower part of her belly, where now she used to tie it not to hurt her or the baby. She also wrapped her hands around her naked breasts and breathed in.

" You can look. It occurred me you never really saw me like this."

Aoshi turned to face her and saw the doctor standing in the middle of the room, half-naked. Yes, he had never seen her body like that. Megumi stretched one hand to him while the other hand and arm still hid her breasts.

"Come here."

Aoshi decided to take her hand and she brought him closer. He kept his blue piercing eyes veiled by his bangs but she could tell he was looking at her face.

"Give me your two hands." She asked in a whisper.

He obeyed and placed both his hands over her free one. Her free arm descended and laid on her belly. There, she placed his hands and took hers away.

Megumi smiled when she saw the amusement on his face.

" You had never touched…"

It was true but he didn't say anything. Her body was different from the one he knew but it didn't make her ugly at all. It was the same perfumed and white skin of hers that now worked as a shelter for a child. His strong hands were delicate in touching and circling her prominent pregnant belly. The same body he had touched times before was now so different from the last time he touched it but he could recognize well the texture, the softness and unique paleness of that body he had embraced many times before. And he worked on touching and feeling the new curves of her body, the new shape and he kept on trying to get familiar with all that difference.

Megumi felt like a foolish sentimental one when she felt the urge to cry. It impressed her much the semi-transparent shade of blue his eyes got that time and his facial expression was somehow different. She closed her eyes and breathed in calmly, feeling his warm hands on her belly.

In a rapid second, he withdrew his hands and looked at her. She hid her teary eyes and smiled.

" It moved again!"

She turned around and dressed the upper part of her yukata again but letting it loose. Then, the doctor looked at Aoshi again.

" I am sorry if it was too awkward…"

"No… not at all."

It really seemed they didn't know what to do. They just spent their time standing, Megumi looking to the floor and Aoshi looking at her. She opened her eyes in surprise when she felt his hand touching her face the same way he did years ago when he threatened her. But this time, the touch was softer and his eyes were different.

" Megumi, I never told you but I feel glad about this child."

She raised her eyes and looked at him, totally amused.

" Really?"

" I can assure you of that."

She made the distance between them shorter and threw herself against his body, encircling it. He didn't know what to do at that moment but he just remembered what would be the right thing to do and for her surprise, his hand came up and caressed her hair.

XxXx

Her eyes surveyed the darkened walls of her room in that sleepless night. The waiting was draining her and his words were never enough. She was tired, pretty tired.

When morning came, Misao walked decidedly to the kitchen to meet the rest of the Aoi-ya staff about to have breakfast.

" No news?"

Both Okon and Omasu shook their heads.

"AH! This can't be! This can't be!" she threw her hands heavenwards while sitting on the table.

"Misao…" Okina gave her a stern look.

" I know, gramps, I know, but I can hold no more! Aoshi-sama is playing with us!"

"Oh, Misao! How can you talk like this about the Okashira?" Omasu looked angry and threatening with a large spoon on her hand.

" Oops, you know, he is taking too long again, maybe there is something wrong…"

" Even if there IS something wrong, Misao, Aoshi knows how to take care of himself." Okina said as he munched a rice ball.

Misao sighed. They would never let her do what she had in mind. " But it's been months already since he came back from Hokkaido and he didn't return home! It's been more than six months we last saw him.What if…"

" No! Nobody is going to interfere on Aoshi's business, including you, little girl!"

" But…"

" No speculations or anything Misao. That is my final word." Okina said and filled his chest with air, trying to look and sound impressive.

Okon and Omasu exchanged exasperated looks and sighed. Misao shut her mouth and moped.

The day at Aoi-ya was busy as ever. By lunchtime, Kuro, Shiro, Okon and Omasu were damped with work.

"Where the heck is Misao?" Okina entered the restaurant and asked after looking around and seeing the girl nowhere.

" We don't have a clue!" Omasu pointed out. " We've been so busy today and she didn't show up to help yet."

" Hum…" Okina mused. " Give me this tray and go upstairs looking for her Okon. Check her gi too."

Okon handed Okina the tray and headed upstairs. She entered the girl's room and saw everything was in its right place. When she opened the drawers, Okon realized some clothes were missing and so was her onmitsu gi.

" Now, it IS going to be hell."

Okon made her ay back downstairs just in time to take a drooling Okina from a lonesome young woman's heels.

" Okina-san…"

It was not necessary to say. He could guess by Okon's expression what had happened.

"Misao…"

XxXxXx

Misao looked happily through the windows of the train.

"Aoshi-sama… I am going after you. I promised myself I would never let you go again."

She cupped her chin on her palms and grinned to the sky.

XxXxXx

Vocabulary: ANATA- dear, darling. That is the way a wife calls her husband affectionately. Tomoe calls Kenshin like this!

Uh-oh, Misao at sight:D

And he smiled! Of course this was going to happen one way or another but it does not mean Aoshi is melting down and becoming a sissy! Aoshi will always be our favorite Iceman but he just found out a good emotion and a good reason to smile now. I really imagined it cute! Ooooooooooow…

I am also writing about the old fox Megumi again but with the mood shifts. At least she is not that depressed lady anymore! And she does tease! ; P

**Thief Rikku** indeed, who wouldn't fall for Aoshi? I also think Saeko is kawaii!

**Leila Winters:** thank you for correcting me once again! Well, I decided to put Saeko using "old language" to show all her respect and admiration for our dear Aoshi. So, she really addresses to him as if he were a god. Well, isn't he: P

**Ak0**: haha, yes, how could she say no? But she had her reasons, let's respect the girl!

**Ella:** well, if he is going to fall for Saeko? Only time will tell… /rolls eyes

**Yvonne:** thank you, dear. I AM continuing the story!

On April 21st, this fan fiction had its first anniversary. Thank you all who have been reading my poor thoughts on this lovely couple for this year! You rule! A big special thank to Leila Winters for encouraging me to write more when this fic was abandoned.

Next chapter: Misao arrives in Tokyo. Will she find Aoshi? Will she get Aoshi to go back to Kyoto with her?


	36. Danger

Chapter XXXVI- Danger

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: you already know it by heart… don't you?

XxXxXx

Megumi woke up feeling strange. She was dizzy and feeling too sick for an almost six-month pregnancy. She sat on the bed and felt she couldn't continue, the nauseas were too strong.

As he had to do sometimes, Aoshi knocked on Megumi's room door and waited for some seconds for her to answer. That day she didn't answer. He decided to go inside despite of everything to wake her up. After the pregnancy, she had had an inconstant sleep, sleeping too little at night and deeply during the early hours of morning. She was sat on the bed with her hands on her face.

He approached and crouched near her. " What's wrong, Megumi?"

She sighed and looked at him with a weird expression in her eyes. " Nothing really. Normal things about pregnancy, I suspect."

Aoshi watched as she got far from him and walked to the bathroom.

She knew she was not ok that morning but it wouldn't ground her into home. She needed to breathe. Slowly, Megumi undressed and entered the hot water Aoshi had previously prepared for her bath. Her limbs relaxed as she inhaled the fine smell of essence oils she had poured into the water. Somehow it made her feel better and it controlled her nauseas for a little while. Only then, the doctor allowed herself to smile for the first time that day as her hand slid down her body and lingered on her belly, making smaller circles around it at each time until she would only encircle her navel. But soon the nauseas came back and Megumi decided to leave the tub immediately but taking enough care not to trip and fall.

In the kitchen, Aoshi had already prepared breakfast. He was wearing a navy blue suit, perfectly set and white gloves. His eyes shifted to the hallway as he saw Megumi walking slowly and trying to force a smile on her lips.

"Good morning." Her voice sounded weak.

" Good morning." He responded but could not help looking at her as she entered and sat.

Megumi seemed not to be hungry, she merely looked at the food and chewed a rice ball for ages.

"Did I do anything wrong with the food?" Aoshi raised one pair of blue eyes to her.

"No! It is that I am not that hungry today." She said without looking at him.

He had finished eating a long time ago but he was still there into the kitchen with her, finding her behavior strange. At the usual time, Saeko knocked on the door and he opened it. At the same time, Megumi stood up from her chair and walked along the girl to the clinic. Without even touching her tea.

During the whole morning, Saeko realized the doctor was strange. She was smiling but it seemed she was putting lots of effort to do so. She was also very silent and Saeko caught her breathing deeply many times. At the end of the morning when there was nobody else to tend to, Megumi surprised Saeko by walking outside.

" Pardon me, Takani-sensei, but…"

"I am going to the hospital, Saeko. Please, close the clinic when it is time. I am going to work earlier today. You take the key and you can come here this afternoon to pick medicine for your mother. I told Aoshi yesterday and he will be bringing it later on."

Saeko could do nothing but watch the doctor walking slowly under the shinning sun. The girl went back to her desk and sat there for long minutes and stood up again when it was time to close the clinic. She walked calmly and bound the papers together, put the cushions on their right places and proceeded on putting everything into order.

Suddenly a great shadow was projected on the wall. Saeko looked behind and saw Shinomori Aoshi standing by the door. Aoshi's eyes surveyed the clinic for some seconds until they laid down on Saeko.

" Where is Megumi?" his voice was deep and calm.

Saeko straightened her body and clasped her hands together.

" She… left, sensei."

Aoshi frowned a bit. " Left?"

The girl nodded. "She told me she was going to the hospital to work earlier today."

Aoshi's eyes darkened for a while. He turned around and murmured "thank you" before leaving. He had probably brought the medicine she needed for her mother's knee full recovery but she didn't dare to ask that time.

Saeko came right after him and closed the door. From the outside, she saw he had gone home.

Aoshi entered the house and walked to the meditation room. He took off his gloves and jacket after placing some sheets of paper aside. He also noticed the bottle of medicine he was supposed to give to Saeko but he had forgotten to do it. Anyway, the girl was supposed to stop by that afternoon. Megumi's actions just disturbed him that time. "Stubborn." He thought. He walked into the room as he loosened the black tie from the collar of his white shirt. Megumi's behavior that morning somehow irritated him. Not only she was too quiet but she also refused to eat.

Aoshi had lunch alone and stood quiet as if meditating into his room. When he opened his eyes and stood up, he immediately looked for his precious blades. His eyes ran over the sheath as his fingers did the same. Looking through the window, he saw the sun was shinning but dark clouds were coming. He got his trench coat and hid the swords under it. There was something different in his eyes now. Shine. He analyzed the papers he had brought with him that day for the last time and his semblance changed. Aoshi walked outside and soon he could no longer be seen. He would go into action once more and that excited and unstressed him at the same time.

xXx

Megumi braced herself against a wall of one seeming-endless corridor. The air was too thick for her to breathe and her dizziness had amazingly increased.

"Calm down, Megumi." She tried to talk to herself and she saw the white walls swirling and blurred people coming from afar.

She tried to walk to a room where she could sit and rest for a while. She saw the afternoon had become grey and it would soon start to rain. She could hear the thunders. She moved slowly, walking by the wall, trying to follow the blurred light at the end of the hallway. A sting came from inside and seemed to suffocate her. Megumi rested her back against the wall and looked through a glass window. The trees were rustling near, but the noise was getting to be farther and farther away. She turned her head to the left and saw the blurred people approaching but her body seemed to have run out of strength. She could hear someone calling her name but the voice was now too muffled and too far away and she could see no more.

A young doctor came running as he saw the woman braced against a wall and sliding down to the floor. " Takani-sensei, Takani-sensei" he called as he was approaching her but the doctor didn't answer or look. When he got near her, he saw she had passed out and he immediately grabbed her wrist to check her pulse. He waited and realized it was not normal. He was about to take her to a more appropriate place when he saw Matsuyama-sensei arriving.

" What happened, Samura-sensei?" he sounded worried.

" I don't know, sensei. I saw her sliding down to the floor and I called her name but she had passed out."

Matsuyama-sensei gestured for the young man to step back as he came near Megumi. The younger one watched that Matsuyama-sensei had winced. It was noticeable he had feelings for the woman doctor; at least it was what had been said by the hospital staff.

When Matsuyama-sensei placed his hand on her nape and was about to lift her, Megumi's eyes opened in a sudden and she breathed in too deeply as if drowning. Her body trembled and her eyes were too wide. When she could focus again, she saw she was almost in Matsuyama-sensei's arms.

" Takani-sensei." His voice was low and soft " you passed out."

But Megumi wasn't really listening to his words. She was confused and the only thing she wanted to do was to stand up again. Realizing her intentions, Matsuyama-sensei helped her under curious looks from Samura-sensei.

" I am better. Thank you." She stated to both doctors.

Matsuyama-sensei looked at her with some disbelief. "You don't look this better, Takani-sensei. I think you should go home, eat something and rest."

Megumi looked at the back of her hands and they were almost as white as alabaster besides being cold.

" I can escort her home, Matsuyama-sensei." Samura-sensei stepped forward.

"It won't be necessary, Samura." Matsuyama-sensei replied. "I will do it myself."

Takani Megumi and Matsuyama Noburi entered a carriage. Megumi sat near the window and looked through it the whole time. The sun was no longer visible, there were only the dark clouds and the first raindrops falling while thunders could be heard. Matsuyama-sensei eyed her discretely. She was silent and white that day. Her black hair seemed to make her look like a marble statue and when he touched her, he realized there was almost no human heat on her but a coldness he had felt only on statues. Yet, the texture of her hair and skin lingered on his fingers as well as the jasmine scent emanating from her lingered on his nostrils.

When the carriage stopped, Matsuyama-sensei was the one who hopped out first. He took his jacket and opened it above the door, making a protection so that Megumi wouldn't get wet. He accompanied her to her door.

" Thank you, Matsuyama-sensei."

" Aren't you going to be alone here, sensei?"

" Don't worry, I just spent too much time without eating. And Shinomori-san may be around to watch over me."

Matsuyama-sensei smiled and stepped back.

" I hope you get better soon and can be with all of us there at the hospital tomorrow."

"I will be." She smiled sadly and closed the door.

Matsuyama-sensei still spent some seconds stopped by her door, facing it as if Megumi could come outside again.

She entered her house and looked around. Everything was closed and quiet.

" Aoshi-san." She called out expecting a response although she considered he might not be home.

He didn't answer. Megumi walked to the meditation room and saw it was empty, the trench coat and the swords were gone. He left… a mission, most probably. She sadly walked to the other room where the cradle was. Megumi sat on the floor and braced herself against the cradle as her hands cuddled the teddy bear.

"Playing tricks on your mother…" she smiled sadly. She had felt the baby move sometimes that day despite of the bad things she was feeling; but it should be normal. It was normal for pregnant women to be dizzy and sick.

It was getting colder and darker as the rain was falling heavily outside. It was only four p.m. but the sky was tinted with a deep grey. Megumi felt shivers and with great difficulty, she walked to her room and sank into the blankets without even changing into more comfortable clothes.

xXx

The city was too grey for a summer afternoon. The rain kept on falling insistently and making small torrents on the edge of the streets.

The young and petite girl left the train station and walked the empty streets. She couldn't guess it would rain that much and she didn't have anything to protect herself from the cold rain. Her small bag contained food and some clothes only, none of them hot enough for that occasion. The only place in Tokyo she really knew how to get was the dojo and chances were Aoshi would be there.

The rain was soaking her to the bones and she shivered, almost sobbing and breathless from the contact of the cold rain on her skin. She ran the faster she could, trying to avoid the torrents. She could stop and wait for the rain to pass but she didn't know when that would happen, she even didn't know if that could happen. And she ran down the streets, trying to fight the darkness that was approaching little by little.

Finally, she realized the dojo was at sight. A big smile showed up on her lips and she put all her strength on her legs so she could get there and run into Aoshi-sama's arms. Misao was panting when she got out of the rain. She knocked on the door and waited. A sleeping Yahiko came to answer the door, rubbing his eyes.

" Hello." She greeted.

Yahiko yawned.

" Is Aoshi-sama here, Yahiko?"

Yahiko seemed not to be able to open his eyes. " Aoshi-sama? No, try at Megumi's house."

Misao froze. " Megumi's? Where is it?"

Yahiko yawned once more before explaining to the girl how to get to Megumi's house.

The girl was now panting but not because she was tired but because she was angry.

" I will come back later to visit. Thank you, Yahiko." She left running.

" No problem, Misao." He closed the shoji door and walked to his futon once again. When he suspended the blanket, his eyes widened and almost fell from their orbs. "MISAO?" he yelled. He ran to the porch but he could no longer see the girl. Sanosuke was arriving, soaked and chewing fishbone. He looked at Yahiko who had a desperate expression.

" What's the problem, brat?"

"I-I am going to be slain…" he looked terrified.

Sano laughed. " By whom?"

Yahiko seemed mortified. "Shinomori Aoshi."

Sanosuke's expression changed and assumed a serious tone "Ok, brat, what did you do?"

"Misao. I told her to go to Megumi's and look for Aoshi there."

Sanosuke snapped his forehead. "Damn… that is bad. But Shinomori knows how to deal with that weasel-girl. But you're idiot, has anyone ever told you that?"

Sanosuke entered the dojo and Yahiko stood still like a dummy.

xXx

Aoshi entered the Government Headquarters in his usual calm and aloof way. His spying activities had left him lighter for it was always good to remember the old times. When he passed by the receptionist guy, the man glanced him and came after him.

"Shinomori-sama."

Aoshi stopped and looked at the shorter man coming after him.

" I am sorry but this was left to you here some minutes ago." He handed him an envelope and disappeared that very second.

Aoshi looked at the handwriting and he knew who had written that. He opened it immediately and his eyes read the note.

"_Misao went to Tokyo and must be arriving by the time you read this._

_Okina"_

Aoshi put the note into the pockets of his jacket and turned on his heels to face the door. He left the building with long strides and ran to the dojo.

The rain was falling down but Aoshi didn't mind. When he got closer to the dojo, he noticed that Yahiko had run from the porch to the inside. Aoshi walked with his long strides into the dojo. Kenshin looked at him totally amazed.

" Aoshi-san!"

" Himura. I am looking for Misao."

The ex-samurai blinked. " Misao-dono?"

"Yes. She arrived in Tokyo this afternoon."

Sanosuke was in another room but he heard the talk. Immediately, he went to the room where Aoshi and Kenshin were now standing.

" Shinomori, weren't you with Megumi?"

" What are you talking about, Sagara?"

Sanosuke breathed in. " Misao is going to Megumi's house to look for you."

"What?"

"I didn't follow because I thought you would be there."

Aoshi shot Sanosuke a death glare and left in a hurry.

"What is happening, Sano?" Kenshin asked.

" Now I am worried. Yahiko sent the weasel-girl to the fox house."

xXx

It was not very far. Misao could spot the street Yahiko had talked about., she just wasn't too sure about what house Megumi's one would be. When she got near, she asked an old lady who was holding an umbrella and appreciating the rain.

" Good afternoon. Is Takani Megumi house here?"

The old lady looked at the girl and nodded.

"Yes, it is, but the sensei is at the hospital now. Maybe you find her husband home tough."

Misao's eyes widened and her heart pumped. "Hu-husband?"

The old woman smiled. "Yes. Shinomori-san."

Misao felt like sinking, the ground was not under her feet anymore and her head hurt.

" Thank you." She said to the woman and walked to the white house surrounded by a pretty garden. The next door was a clinic. Her clinic, Misao thought.

The girl stepped on the porch and knocked on the door.

Megumi heard someone was knocking on her door and opened her eyes. Her vision was blurred but she needed to open, it could be important. Unfortunately, Aoshi was not home to do it for her. It couldn't be Saeko because she had the key to enter the clinic. A new knock was heard and she left the bed. The woman walked slowly, tottering, and praying not to fall. She could now see the doorframe and the wood looked so blurry. A new knock. Megumi finally placed her hand on the door and opened it slowly.

She couldn't tell what happened, she only felt a draft of wind and saw someone right there in front of her.

xXx

Misao waited too long but she could hear there was someone inside, walking slowly to open the door. From behind the wooden door, Megumi's figure appeared. Misao's nostrils flared and she got more furious than ever. Megumi, the one she once had called friend. The ninja girl grabbed the doctor's shoulder and looked into her eyes. Megumi seemed too confused, she didn't speak a thing.

xXx

Saeko walked with her umbrella and took a key out of her kimono when she stopped by the clinic door. She entered the waiting room and arranged some wet locks of hair back into place.

Everything was very calm as she searched the medicine bottle she was supposed to take home until she heard voices. She thought it couldn't really be into Megumi's house, she was working. However, Saeko heard the voices again and this time, she recognized Megumi's voice. She couldn't find the medicine and decided to go inside and ask the doctor if she knew where Shinomori-sensei had left it. There was another woman there she didn't know the voice but it made her worried when she heard the other woman was talking TOO loud, it sounded like a fight.. Saeko ran to the other room to open the door and see what was going on.

xXx

Thick tears rolled down Misao's cheek " Tell me it is not true… please, where is Aoshi-sama?"

Megumi felt the grip on her shoulders sliding to both her arms and getting tighter.

"What?" her voice was weak. "I can't understand… Misao?" her eyes widened.

The girl was crying. "Yes, it is me. Tell me where Aoshi-sama is, tell me you are not married!" Misao was so desperate she started shaking Megumi.

Megumi fought to release herself form the girl's grip but her dizziness didn't allow it.

"Aoshi-san is not here. I don't know."

Misao's face was very red. Her eyes bore anger. She knew Megumi was trying to escape her. "You liar!"

xXx

Aoshi ran faster and faster. He couldn't let Misao into Megumi's house. When he was going up the lane, he realized it could be too late. He ran more and more and he saw Misao had gone inside but the door was still open and things didn't seem to be doing nice. Misao was grabbing Megumi's arms.

"I…" Megumi tried to speak but she couldn't. She was getting even dizzier and breathless now, she could barely see anything before her eyes.

Misao realized Megumi's eyes were not normal. Scared, she stopped shaking the doctor.

"Stop it, Misao!" a deep, cold and strong male voice echoed into the room.

The girl blinked and turned around immediately. It was her Aoshi-sama coming running. Immediately, Misao looked at the other woman and let go of Megumi.

The doctor stumbled and hit her back on the wall, sliding to the floor afterwards.

" Stop it, she is pregnant!" Aoshi screamed.

"_Aoshi-sama!"_

And the world stopped all around Misao. She thought she had become numb and shapeless. Paralyzed. Her big jade eyes didn't blink and her chest didn't rise to show she was breathing. Silence and blurred visions. Everything was frozen.

_My fall will be for you  
My love will be in you  
If you be the one to cut me  
I will bleed forever_

Saeko had opened the door the very minute Aoshi had screamed from the outside that Megumi was pregnant. She couldn't see the man tough. Right in front of her there was a young woman, stuck, in shock with lips parted and widened eyes. On the floor, she saw Megumi trying to sit down.

Aoshi crossed the door like an arrow and came to help the fallen woman. Misao's eyes registered it in slow motion tough. She saw her beloved Aoshi-sama pass by her, making raindrops reach her skin and crouch to the woman on the floor. She saw he was speaking to Megumi, she nodded and he carried her into his arms. But her vision was blurred; when she blinked, hot tears touched her cold skin. There was another woman standing between them, a woman she didn't know. Misao was too unhappy. What could she do now? Regaining strength, she looked behind and saw the open door.

" Megumi." Aoshi came to her. " Are you feeling well?"

She breathed in and looked to him; he was very serious, his lips firmly pressed together and he was leaning over her, helping her to come to his arms.

" I am fine. Dizzy but fine." She let him take her and she hid her face into his wet trench coat.

Saeko didn't know what to do. Yes, she was shocked by the news but why was Megumi on the floor and who was that younger woman standing there?

Aoshi lifted Megumi and before disappearing with her into the hallway, she turned to Misao and looked at her.

" I am not over with you."

Yes. There was the open door. When Aoshi entered one of the rooms Misao just turned around and disappeared through the door. Saeko tried to stop her but she was faster.

" Hey you, wait!" But the woman dressing such a strange gi disappeared into the falling rain.

xXx

Aoshi was worried and Megumi could read it in his blue eyes. He put her on the bed and spent some seconds looking at her. Her vision was less blurry but her back really hurt.

" I am sorry for Misao. And for wetting you."

She smiled in attempt to dismiss the tension. Her light blue kimono was wet in several parts and her smock was now sticking to her belly. Megumi slid her hand on her belly, protectively and her eyes became distant. Her back hurt and the nauseas were back.

" Maybe you should go outside and stay with… her" her voice was barely audible in the last part.

Aoshi's eyes roamed the room. " Misao and I have to talk."

Megumi gathered strength and in a great effort, she stood up. Aoshi came to her and tried to take her back to bed but she shook her head, keeping him far. She walked to him and looked into those blue eyes and for some seconds, she felt her soul almost at ease. She placed both hands on his chest and spoke decidedly:

" You belong with Oniwabanshuu and you know that. Go now." She smiled and leaned forward with eyes closed, besides standing on tiptoe. Her lips almost met the cold ones of his but she dodged from the logical path and merely looked into his vast blue eyes… and she smiled purely. Megumi stepped back short seconds later and looked at him in a completely lovely way. " I will be fine." She pressed her fingers, realizing they were very cold.

Aoshi said nothing more. Her pure smile and the deep eye contact she had kept with him… He knew he needed to solve some important issues and it had to be now. He turned around and walked outside, closing her bedroom door but hesitating to leave her alone: she had been thrown on the floor violently some minutes before.

She swore she wouldn't cry but it was impossible to restrain one tear that came faster than she imagined. "Fare thee well, Aoshi." And with that, her tired body fell on the soft mattress and the white sheets received little colorful dots.

xXx

Aoshi found Saeko running to the porch. He could have guessed what had happened.

" Sensei, she went away! Through there. I am so sorry I couldn't stop her."

He nodded and passed by her. He knew Saeko could not manage to stop Misao.

" Is she fine, sensei?" her inquiring jade eyes made him think of Misao ones.

"Megumi? She says so, but watch over her, Saeko-san. Mif something unexpected happens, you will know what to do, I believe."

Saeko watched the man disappear outside in the coming darkness. The house was now too silent and gloomy. A flashback came to her mind and it was as if she could listen to Shinomori-sensei's voice telling that the doctor was pregnant. And the younger woman froze. Saeko smiled sadly. Takani-sensei is pregnant. What happiness for her. And she thought of Shinomori-sensei running after the young woman and letting his wife there. But he had been sweet coming and taking her inside. Shinomori-sensei. Saeko walked to Takani-sensei's room and knocked on the door.

" Takani-sensei? It is me, Saeko. Are you okay?" she expected the doctor to answer. "Sensei?" but she didn't answer. Leaving behind any sense of property, Saeko decided to open the door. And she saw the sensei like a fallen deity on the white sheets, an immaculate snowy scene if it weren't for her sad smile …

Saeko couldn't believe. " I-I need to do something. I need to find Shinomori-sensei."

xXx

Misao ran faster, ignoring the screams of that unknown woman she had seen at Megumi's house. Megumi. She felt a wave of heat come to her face. Megumi was pregnant. Aoshi-sama's son, most probably. Yet, she couldn't believe. Her Aoshi-sama had betrayed her. He had fooled her, once again.

Misao couldn't tell where she was now. The rain had made the small rivers near the city run faster and everything was desert and dark. The rain had stopped and it was windy. The wind was taking the clouds to the west and letting the full moon appear. The grown weed touched her naked calves as she followed the water. Misao took off her sandals, unwrapping them carefully and sitting by the water. Both her feet sunk into the river and she felt herself even colder.

"Aoshi-sama… you are the one to cut me."

Aoshi knew Misao couldn't have gone too far. She didn't know the city very much and there were a couple of years since she had last stepped there. He walked fast but extremely attentive to everything around. He remembered of when she was little and used to run away and hide near the water or springs.

It was dark but his accurate eyes could reach the girl figure anyplace. His trained ears heard water running and girlish sobs. He walked into the weeds and he could see the full moon reflected on the water. He also heard what he suspected that were feet tapping the water. He got near enough and recognized her smell.

" Misao."

His speaking of her name cut her breath. She looked behind and saw the tall man standing behind her and he approached more and more. She wanted to run but she also wanted to stay and be with him. In the end, she stood motionless.

He came, crouched near her and then, sat down.

" We definitely have to talk." His voice was deep and it sent shivers down her spine.

XxXxXxXxXx

I am becoming the cliff-girl… :P anyway, next chapter, many things will be solved, or at least, I expect so.

Although soap operas and movies show that when a person fain, one takes ages to come to, that is not really the truth. You only take two minutes, if it takes that much…

Sorry for the innumerous scene shifts but I thought those were really necessary.

There was something I wrote about Aoshi going into action and getting unstressed after that. Doesn't it just sound like a Saitou-ish thing:P

The verses in the middle of the fic, related to Misao, are from a Nightwish song called Ghost Love Score. Wonderful.

I am currently watching X 1999, the TV Series and it is so cute Kamui answers "Aa". /melts

And I definitely can't stand Brazilian dubbing… Aoshi's voice makes me get nervous and I always have the will to turn off the computer.

**Ladie Shinomori**: thank you! I was very very flattered by your comment. Misao is in, now let's see what happens next!

**Araly:** once again, I smiled while reading your review! Don't throw the tantrum, here it is!

**Yvonne:** not so fast, I am sorry! Blame it on the black star! What are Aoshi and Misao going to do?

**Ak0: ** hehe… Meg is not really driving him crazy. I wonder he never really took so much of his time by a pregnant woman's side, if he ever took that much time by a woman that was not Misao. But it is nice, IMO, when she drives him out of coldness!

**Leila:** you wrote on chapter 35 review " argh! Someone needs to shoot Misao." Well, I think you must be screaming it now! And Aoshi is a sweet babe, I love to write about him discovering fatherhood and feelings. So, after now, other people know of the pregnancy. For how long will this secret last? Oh, yes, THAT scene of the touch on her belly. I ever made a drawing for it but I am ashamed to show: P The two of them rolling on the huge couple bed? Hum… let's see… : P


	37. Understanding

Chapter XXXVII- Understanding

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: you already know it by heart… don't you?

**RE-POSTED: I had just found out there were some details missing! Sorry!**

XxXxXx

She didn't dare to look but she sensed him right there by her side. The air was cold and impregnated with rain. Misao inhaled the air, hoping it could do her any good.

Realizing the girl would be the silent one at least in the beginning, Aoshi decided to ask first.

"Why did you come?"

She bit her lip, trying to dismiss the sting she felt from that razor-like question. "I came for you." She spoke too low but he could hear well. "I missed you, Aoshi-sama."

Aoshi knew he had to be strict with her that time although he really didn't want to.

"I wrote you and Okina telling I was fine here. And that **I** would be the one to go to Kyoto when it was time."

Some seconds of complete silent lingered between them.

"I know. But I couldn't help. And now it seems to me you were hiding, like you did years ago, it always comes back to haunt me…"

She realized Aoshi's expression had changed. Undoubtedly, they both remembered of that time a couple of years ago when he had almost killed Okina and when his mates had been slain.

"I am sorry, Aoshi-sama… I really didn't mean it. I swear." She sounded regretful and tried to make up with him.

Those times had been so difficult and Aoshi was surely very ashamed of them. If he could, he would not think of them anymore but they were always there to haunt him anyway.

"But this time, Misao, unlike some years ago, I did not do anything shameful." His voice was bitter.

Misao decided to say nothing else. Not only she was ashamed for raising the point but she also felt hurt for Aoshi's recent activities.

"I do apologize it happened this way to you…" he continued and she listened with all attention. " It was also surprising for me, I imagine it was shocking for you."

" Shocking?" she thought . It was surely one of the worst things she had ever discovered.

" Aoshi-sama?" she didn't look at him and avoided his eyes when she looked at her.

" Aa."

She knew her voice would be muffled, she knew but she had to control it a bit. Misao hesitated, pondered, she held her breath wondering if it should be that straightforward

" You and Megumi… for how long?"

Aoshi surely realized what the girl had been trying to hide. He knew her so well… he had showed many times he was strict, serious and angry but into him, he knew he could not be angry at her in reality. " I do not recall exactly… about two years…"

Her head sank into her arms and she felt like crying. Two years… she felt betrayed. She had dedicated herself so much, she devoted herself and now she discovered it wasn't something new.

_My fall will be for you  
My love will be in you  
You were the one to cut me  
So I will bleed forever_

The wind changed and made the grass hustle. All the seconds that lingered between them seemed to be lingering forever. Some more dark clouds passed above their heads, hiding the moon for some minutes. Misao's feet still tapped the water.

"I-I know it is silly… but… do you love her, Aoshi-sama?"

He thought for several long minutes before answering. He had to be careful with every word not to hurt his little one more than she was already hurting. All because of him.

" I have a commitment with her and with this child, Misao. And this is a commitment for a lifetime."

"He didn't answer my question…" she was half happy and half frustrated. " At least he didn't tell me he loved her." Misao sighed in both relief and apprehension while thinking.

_I will bleed forever._

And minutes lingered between the two of them. Long minutes drifted away in the cold wind that was insistently blowing and disarranging the soaked strands of their black hairs. The pale moonlight insisted on gleaming up above, while Misao's taps disturbed the mirror-like water surface. Aoshi's eyes, cobalt blue that time, spent long minutes closed. His head tilted down, his chin almost touching the fabric of his dark clothes. When all was dark and the moon had been covered, Aoshi opened his eyes and his cold voice sounded in the wind.

" Misao… I suppose it is time for us to talk frankly. I shall open myself to you now in a way I never opened to anybody…" Aoshi sounded different. He was indeed forcing himself into an alien behavior not to hurt the girl even though he had to hurt himself.

She looked at him in both amusement and worriment. What would come next?

The clouds had passed. Aoshi was now staring at the full moon reflected on the calmer glassy surface of river and the passing dark clouds.

" I already care for and want this child." He said. Misao blinked in confusion. She could swear that, for one nanosecond, she had seen a slight smile on his lips.

" And Megumi is a good person. She is one of the few women that would make a good mother and somehow I feel at ease she carries my child.."

She looked at him almost in disbelief. But he was keeping his word, he said he would open himself that time. He didn't tell anything serious about Megumi, but there was something unusual about the way he had talked about her and his child now.

" Aoshi-sama… don't you see me, haven't you ever seen me as a woman?" her face was burning hot but she decided she would also make her point very clear that time.

He looked at her and it hurt. She was totally grown-up now. Beautiful and enchanting. A woman, that was true… a woman. Her face was less childish although she sometimes just acted as the spoiled and active girl he always knew.

" I see and understand you are a grown-up woman, Misao."

She beamed inside that time. It was the first time he ever told he recognized her as being a woman.

"But I am still grounded to the old idea that you would never grow up, you would always be that pretty little girl."

Misao smiled and she felt warm to think of her and Aoshi years ago, when she was only a little child and he was the one guiding her. He always had time for her even though being the Okashira had made him too busy. And she missed those times so much.

"You'll still be my pretty girl, if you want to." His voice bore the ultimate warmth that could ever exist into him. For an alien listener, it would be impossible to believe that was Shinomori Aoshi talking.

His pretty girl. HIS. Wasn't it what she had always wanted? She wanted to have an important role in his life, she wanted to have a meaning.

A wave of heat came swirling across her spine and she smiled, also, she felt her eyes getting wet and warm.

" Aoshi-sama, I love you. I love you too much." She didn't know if she was smiling or really crying that time.

Aoshi got nearer so the side of their bodies touched. He was going against all odds, but he had begun it and it had to have an end. But he didn't want to cause more suffering to that pure girl, to that immaculate soul. He didn't want to dirt her with his sins and with his behavior. It took so much of him to part his lips and say…

" I feel so much for you too, Misao. And I never hid that from anyone. Also, I apologize for hurting you so much now and before. That is what makes me unworthy of all the feelings you could keep for me."

Her eyes widened and her heart pumped so strong she felt it could break through her bones and skin. Aoshi loved her. Her Aoshi-sama loved her.

A different gleam on her eyes made him feel strange. When in his life had he been so open? When had he talked about his feelings? When has anyone considered he had feelings, he could even love?

"Aoshi-sama…" her voice faltered due to her tears.

He knew it would hurt that time, but he would try to minimize the pain for her. "I want you as my little girl; the pure and beautiful hearted one I always knew. This is the kind of love I have to offer you and this love will never change."

She breathed in and squeezed her eyes in a painful semblance. "Always a little girl. Always!" she thought, wincing with his last sentence.

Aoshi knew what would come next. The water became disturbed and the reflection of the moon was shaky and blurred.

" Why? Why can't you love me the way I've always wanted? The way I wanted you to love me? Why? Aren't I interesting enough? Aren't I beautiful enough to your eyes? Aren't I attractive to these eyes of yours? Why have you always blindfolded your eyes when everything was so clear? Why did you choose her to carry your child and not… me?" she suddenly exploded and a fiery shine lit up her jade eyes.

_My fall will be for you_

_My love will be in you_

_If you be the one to cut me _

_I'll bleed forever_

_My fall will be for you_

_My love will be in you_

_You were the one to cut me_

_So I will bleed forever_

Aoshi sighed and closed his eyes. Why did it have to be so difficult? Why?

" I am not the one to choose, Misao. It … happened. And, besides all, I am not the one for you."

She eyed him in disbelief as if defying him to explain her how babies are born! Hasn't he taken the risk with the doctor? But her great love and respect for him made her expression change and she felt guilty for thinking that about him.

" I am sorry." She felt ashamed and hid her eyes. She had understood. He didn't need to say it straight to her but she understood everything perfectly. " But deep inside, there's a victory for me. I knew you were not this icy person everybody thought you were. I had always believed you, Aoshi-sama, even when you didn't believe in yourself."

Misao stood up without raising her head. She had placed her heart in his hands and he gave it back to her. She had lost. She had lost it all. And he had implicitly told her she would never get it. Not what she sought for so many years. And she fought so much… but one day she would have to learn she couldn't rule destiny. She would bleed forever.

Her tremble hands worked in shedding a tear from her already too tear- stained cheek. Only then she looked to the horizon and turned her back to the man.

Aoshi felt battered and tired. He felt too unworthy that time, as unworthy as he had felt a couple of years ago in those terrible circumstances. He sighed and his blue eyes followed the girl's steps through the weed meadow. He also stood up and walked after her, reaching her with immense easiness, placing a hand at her shoulders.

Her slender hand came and touched his strong one over her shoulder. She smiled faintly and decided to put an end in that torment.

" Walk me home, Okashira."

xXx

Saeko was desperate.

Megumi was fallen on the bed and what worried her the most were the increasing red dots on her white kimono.

" Takani-sensei! Wake up, please!" she cried.

But Megumi was cold and motionless. She had to find the sensei, she had to do something.

Saeko ran to the porch, shouted Shinomori-sensei's name but there was no response. She couldn't see him around, she didn't know where he had gone and it was pretty dark that time.

An idea came to her mind. Shinomori-sensei said he expected her to do something if the unexpected happened. The hospital. She had to take Takani-sensei to the hospital immediately.

Saeko rushed into the doctor's room and started gathering useful belongings to be taken to the hospital, she would then stop a carriage on the streets. The young woman went back to the porch, crossed the garden and walked to the streets, waiting for a carriage to pass by. She heard horses galloping but when the carriage passed by her, she saw it was occupied. She was getting tenser and tenser as time was passing by. The street had gotten pretty much desert from carriages in all that darkness and she didn't know what to do. All carriages that passed by were occupied. Twisting the cuffs of her kimono, Saeko walked inside once more after standing outside for more than half an hour. She was pale and shaking. Too bad she didn't have physical strength to carry the doctor to the hospital herself. Too bad the doctors 's friends didn't live around, too bad she didn't have a clue of where they lived, too bad Shinomori-sensei had left running after that girl. Everything was too bad that time.

xXx

Megumi saw everything blurred once again as she regained her senses. There was a sharp pain in the lower part of her belly and she tried to sit down on the bed. With great effort, she managed to brace her back on the head of the bed. But her eyes lingered on stains. Red stains on the white sheets. Her heart sped and she felt all warmth vanish from her body. Blood. Blood!

" A… o… shi…" she tried once but even herself couldn't hear her own calling. She tried to breathe in and gather strength to power up her voice.

" A.O. SHI!" it was better…

" AOSHI! AOSHI!" she sounded sharp and desperate that time. He shouldn't be there or he would have already come even in her second calling for he could hear too well.

Megumi was alone and panicking. Her slender fingers touched the blood and she certified herself the bleeding was not bad although the pain indicated she should be bleeding seriously. She felt relieved somehow. Anyway, it had already stopped bleeding, only little dots were ending its formation. But the pain, why the pain?

" Calm down, you are a doctor, you know it, you know it." She tried to focus on her thoughts and forget the pain. " You are not losing the baby, you aren't, Megumi, you aren't. Feel its movements… feel them… feel…" she closed her eyes and caressed her belly, trying to be meditative as only Aoshi could be. It took her some minutes but she managed to detach herself from the scene in the bedroom and place herself in a different occasion, a different feeling. The biggest pain was in fact coming from her back. If she were lucky, nothing had happened to the baby although she had felt bad all day long.

She checked the blood once again and saw it had stopped and it really didn't bleed that much. Not that much to put her baby's life at risk; it was an almost six-month pregnancy, the baby wouldn't be that affected by that kind of bleeding.

Megumi smiled confidently. She heard rushing steps coming inside after a long period. It didn't sound like him but she spoke anyway.

" Aoshi?"

A female figured showed on the doorframe. Timid and anguished, Saeko came to Megumi's sight.

" No, sensei, it's me, Saeko."

Megumi gave her a little smile but Saeko could see the doctor was rather impatient.

" Shinomori-sensei is not here. He left after that young woman." The girl provided more information.

And then a whole array of memories came to Megumi's mind. It was true. He was gone.

Saeko approached her delicately. " Sensei, forgive me, but I think I should take you to the hospital. You are bleeding. The baby…" she almost whispered.

Megumi winced. Now Saeko also knew about the baby. It was probably the time Aoshi came and rushed inside when Misao was shaking her.

The doctor smiled and placed a cold tremble hand at the girl's shoulder. Saeko was leaning over Megumi to adjust her pillows.

"Don't worry, Saeko-chan. I am fine. There is no need to go to the hospital now."

Saeko eyed her with suspicion. " But Shinomori-sensei designated me to watch over you, Takani-sensei."

Megumi shook her head. " I know how to deal with him. Don't worry."

xXx

Aoshi was guiding the way through various lanes in the darkness. Misao only followed him attentively.

" Aren't we going to the dojo now?"

She couldn't see his face for he was some steps ahead of her but he shook his head. "No."

She shrugged and felt ashamed. Somehow, she knew where he was leading them to.

" Are we going to Megumi's house?" she asked carefully.

" Aa." He didn't stop to answer her nor turned back.

Misao winced. Where was the man she had just seen a couple of minutes ago? Aoshi had completely transformed himself into the impenetrable icicle again. She felt less and less at ease to follow him. She couldn't look at the doctor's face, she couldn't. Megumi had the proof Misao was running from.

" Aoshi-sama…"

" I will take you to the dojo shortly after that, Misao. But there is something strange now and it seems to be urgent."

She didn't dare to speak anything anymore. The girl coiled and embraced herself. She was wet and the cold wind blowing was making her shiver. Aoshi eyes her with the corner of his eyes. He took off his coat and placed it around the girl's shoulders. Not that it would work much. The coat was also cold. But Misao didn't mind, her slender fingers grabbed the collar of the coat and wrapped it around her.

" We are almost arriving." He said.

Indeed, she could recognize the surroundings now. The white house was visible and she could even see the shape of the flowers there in the garden. The lights were on and Aoshi walked decidedly past the small gate. Misao was still on his heels but she hesitated walking into the porch. Aoshi's strong hands opened the door and he walked inside. Realizing Misao had stopped at the porch, he looked behind.

" I am fine here." She said.

" Come in. It is warm here inside."

She was actually feeling cold and decided to take his suggestion. The inside of the house was warm and light, cozy, clean and even perfumed. Misao leaned her body against the wall without removing Aoshi's coat from around her. On the other hand, he walked into a hallway and she noticed he had stopped in front of a large shoji door.

Saeko looked startled to the male figure on the doorframe. Megumi also rose her eyes to look at him.

" Aoshi…" she whispered and looked away trying to disguise the pain on the back she was still feeling.

"Excuse me." Saeko said and decided to vanished from the room that very second.

" Saeko-san…" Aoshi spoke without looking at her. His cold blue eyes were focused on the woman there on the bed. "Thank you for your help. Take a carriage back home and tell the rider to come back here after riding you back there."

" Yes." She nodded, bowed and disappeared from their sight.

Megumi pulled the blanket to cover herself more and more. "It was not necessary to go to the hospital." She said in a whisper while her eyes drifted away from his figure.

He arched a brow to her. " I see there is more blood." His voice was disturbing. It was that same monotone one, yet, it bore some annoyance, something that stung the doctor's ears.

"Don't worry. I am a doctor. It was not enough to put the baby's life at risk."

She knew he had narrowed his eyes on her direction. " Misao is here."

Her eyes immediately shifted to him. "How is she?"

Aoshi couldn't let pass the strange tone in her faltering voice. There was something wrong, he knew it. " Fine."

That was her time to narrow her eyes at him. " Aoshi-san…"

" I don't lie."

"Have you talked?" she inquired

"Aa."

Aoshi eyed her for a few more seconds, approaching little by little.

" What? What is wrong?" she asked.

"Why aren't you able to keep eye contact?"

She sadly smiled. Since when was it easy to keep eye contact with him?

"Nothing…"

"I know you are able to do it, but, still, you are running…"

Megumi coiled herself on the bed, totally aware that Aoshi was approaching.

" And Saeko? The poor girl was desperate!"

Aoshi looked like a statue, coming closer in his uninterested stoic way. " I told her to go on a carriage."

When Aoshi was getting closer to the bed, Megumi stretched her hand and asked Aoshi to stop coming closer although her great will was to go into his arms and look for protection.

" I will bathe soon, clean myself and sleep. But I would like you to do me a favor: go into the clinic and get a light blue vial, please. There is only one there."

He arched his brows and lowered them at the very second. "Aa."

She seemed to want him far away. He turned on his heels and walked to the door.

"Aoshi-san. Don't let Misao alone. She came here because of you."

He didn't look behind or answer. He knew she didn't want him near and he would not impose.

She sighed and breathed in when he was gone. There was pain in every muscle of her body…

XxX

Saeko walked slowly to the main room when her eyes caught sight of a young woman wrapped in that known trench coat. The other one was not surprised to see her and only looked at her with indifference or rather annoyance.

" You." Saeko stated. That was the one that behaved so aggressively towards Takani-sensei. She was the one Shinomori-sensei ran after.

Misao turned her big jade eyes to the other young woman. It was impressive how much they were alike, only now she realized it. But the other girl had no friendly face to her.

Saeko realized then she could only be one person: Misao, Shinomori-sensei's young sister. Looking closer, she could realize the similarities between the two of them.

" Misao." Saeko muttered.

The other girl tightened her grip on the trench coat. " How come you know my name?"

Saeko didn't take her eyes from Misao's frame. " The sensei told me."

" Megumi…" Misao seemed offended.

" No. Shinomori-sensei."

"Aoshi-sama?" she now widened her eyes and sounded surprised. So had Aoshi-sama changed that much?

"You are… his young sister. You hurt Takani-sensei!" Saeko hissed.

Misao didn't understand why Saeko was muttering and whispering. "Humph!" she retorted. Sister… sister…

" I know your are the sensei's sister, but you have no right to do that to the sensei's wife! She does not deserve it! I don't want and I am not to judge anyone but…"

"Wife…" Misao muttered and her static eyes got suddenly filled with tears. "WIFE!" she said louder than the other one's whisper. And why was that girl calling Aoshi-sama sensei?

" Don't talk so loud! Takani-sensei is not well… she is bleeding… she may be losing her baby… all because of what happened earlier!" her jade eyes saddened and Misao realized the other girl was thoughtful and nervous.

It was useless to argue; the other girl would defend Megumi wit her life if she could. But bleeding? Losing the baby? Misao slid down to the floor as Saeko passed by her. A carriage had arrived and before leaving, the jade eyes of the other young woman focused on Misao for a moment.

When Misao was left alone, she felt she was about to fall from a cliff. Losing the baby? She could hate Megumi, she could want Megumi to die, but not the baby. Not the baby. She was too fond of children to wish anything like that. The poor baby had no fault in anything that was happening.

Misao wanted to lift from the floor and walk the hallway to the room where Aoshi-sama had entered minutes before, from where that other girl had emerged. She looked so worried… and herself was to blame if something happened. That baby was a piece of her beloved Aoshi-sama, and as a piece of Aoshi-sama, it had to be loved by her. But she could not go to the room, she had no courage to face Aoshi-sama now, she didn't think she would have enough strength to see Megumi and Aoshi-sama into the same room. She didn't want to see it. She didn't.

Misao saw that in a secluded corner of the main room, there was a small altar with incense burning. She crawled to there and clasped both hands together. " Kami-sama… I won't bear the guilt. Please, help me, help the baby… I promise I will be good… I will love that baby as much as if it were mine. Babies are too pure to be a target of revenge. I am sorry, I am sorry for what I did today, I didn't think. I didn't."

Aoshi walked as if his feet didn't touch the floor. His clenched fist showed a bit of his emotions, but besides that, he looked absolutely impassionate. The house was too silent if it were not for whispers, continuous whispers coming from the main room. It should be Misao. The rain had started once again and this time, it was more violent. He could hear her, he could hear her voice mixed with the rain.

His eyes widened in surprise when he saw what she was doing. Still wrapped in his trench coat, wetting the floor, kneeled and bowed before the small secluded altar Megumi kept. She was praying. Apparently, she was unaware of his arrival so concentrated in her prayers. An entire array of images came to his mind. She was so small, so little, running into the shrine while he was meditating. And then, she would come and sit by his side and watch him carefully, trying to imitate everything he was doing. Or other times when, before sleep, she would ask Kami to look after him. He had seen that so many times… now, he wondered what the reason for her prayer was and why she was praying so desperately. He could focus and listen but he was not sure if he really wanted to know.

When her eyes reopened, he knew she had sensed him there. Her look shifted to his figure and she blushed.

"Aoshi-sama…" she said in a mournful tone.

He didn't respond, instead, he stepped forward as if he would go in the kitchen's direction.

Misao rapidly got up and followed him, close enough to cling to his sleeve.

"Aoshi-sama… tell me… she didn't miscarry."

His eyes almost widened in surprise but he restrained himself for expressing his amusement that way. The expression in the girl's eyes, he could read it. It was despair.

" She says she did not." his uninterested cold tone of voice really didn't match with the situation.

Misao followed him into the kitchen. She smiled when she heard that statement and she would jump if she were not so battered.

Aoshi said no more. He was now fetching a great quantity of water, for a bath, most probably. Misao sat on a nearby chair and looked at him for long whiles, still ashamed for everything that had happened. She wanted to ask more, but shame didn't allow her to do so much.

He didn't seem out to be paying attention to her as he moved softly around the room. He would also prepare tea, she thought, when she saw him retrieving dry leaves from a pack into a cupboard.

"Aoshi-sama…" she thought. He was preparing things for others. In his whole life as Okashira, many served him. He would have anyone to do anything for him with a great smile in one's lips. And now, there was him, fetching water for a bath, preparing tea, soup… serving.

Aoshi shifted and walked out of the kitchen and glanced behind to the girl. " I am going into the clinic. This water is for you to take a bath and be out of these wet clothes. Don't bother with the tea, I will come in no time."

With that, he disappeared into a door in the opposite room.

Misao stood up and pondered. Was it right? She was feeling and intruder in the doctor's world. Too bad they had to share something, someone, Aoshi-sama, for the time being. The water was now boiling and Misao knew what to do. She got the water out of the fire and walked with the bin, tottering through the hallway. One of those doors could only take to the bath house.

Misao placed the bin in front of the first door and pushed the shojo aside. No, it was not a bathroom. It was a room with a…cradle. A fine white wood cradle. They were really expecting that baby, then. Her kunoichi eyes identified a fluffy western teddy bear on the mattress and it made her heart heavy, heavy, heavy.

"What am I doing here?" she thought. And with sadness, she decided to close that room and go to the next.

In front of the next door she knew it was the doctor's room. Misao felt a great shiver trespass her body, both from the cold and from anxiety. If only she could peer inside and discover what was going on… but she had no courage.

There was one last room at the very end of the corridor and the door was open. Curiosity led her there and she stated that could only be… Aoshi-sama's room. The room was filled with the wonderful smell of his and she could see his belongings here and there and a soft futon carefully folded. So… they didn't share the same room, Aoshi-sama and Megumi. That room was too familiar for her and she had finally felt rather comfortable since the beginning of the day; it was as if she had been teleported to Kyoto and she was now entering what she could consider a private shrine. But she knew she could not stay there, Aoshi-sama could return anytime and she really didn't want to be caught in the act.

Misao was sure the door in front of Megumi's room could only be the bathroom. When she pushed the shojo aside, she saw her bag was there and around the tub, she identified innumerous supplies for a bath. She came inside and poured the hot water into the tub. Almost reluctantly, she removed the trench coat from her shoulders and also let her gi fall. When her soaked limbs met the hot water, she felt a great sensation and realized how cold she had been.

Her thoughts, inevitably, were to him. What had made him change so much? She did realize his clenched fist. She noticed the frown and the dark shade his eyes bore despite of the opposite his voice revealed. As far as she could know, he was more talkative to people and… he was caring. He had broken through his crystallized sphere at least a bit and showed himself… why? Why could Megumi make him change and she failed whenever and no matter how hard she tried? What led him to those changes? Yes, he was the same Aoshi-sama, distant and untouchable but she knew him well enough to realize changes in the slightest of his deeds. Maybe it was for the baby… a baby that could not even be exactly his, as she saw they didn't share the same room. But she could not blindfold her eyes to the changes in him. Why?

xXx

Into the clinic room, Aoshi sought for the vial Megumi had asked; she surely knew everything of that place: as she had said, there was only one light blue vial in there and it was not labeled.

The rain was pouring outside, one of those summer night rains that would take long to pass. Most likely, that night would also take long, he thought.

He walked outside the clinic and went into the kitchen. When passing in front of the corridor, he saw no trace of Misao or Megumi. There was none of them into the kitchen either.

Aoshi's keen hearing told him Misao was bathing but no sound came from Megumi's room. Yet, he didn't go inside to check, she had made clear she didn't want him there for now. With dinner, he would take the vial she had asked for but not now, not now. He sat on a chair and looked at the fire, the boiling soup, the bath water and the almost-ready tea.

That was one of the few times in his life he didn't exactly know what to do. He wanted to feel himself empty again, he wanted to refuse all those mixed feelings he knew that were fighting inside of him. His strong hands came to his head and his fingers touched and brushed the fine strands of his black hair behind. He bent over his own body until his elbows met his knees, his hands still into his hair. Not many times he had done that, he assured himself. And his mind traveled to a distant time where a much younger Aoshi lived.

" _As I had told the Okashira before ,I pass the opportunity. I am tired and old. It is best to let this job for the younger ones, more capable, that have more strength, more time and more will."_

_Everyone's eyes widened and many whispered. Even his own eyes widened. Aoshi was surprised Okina had declined the offer to become Okashira._

" _Makimachi-sama…" Okina bowed. " If you would allow me, I am sure there is someone among us who will succeed much more than I would ever do in years."_

_Makimachi-sama eyed Okina trustfully. All the others were curious to know who would that be. If Okina could not take the position, who would? Who was able to do it?_

_Okina smiled fondly at the Okashira and turned on his heels, passing through many onmitsus who waited anxiously for his next words._

_Aoshi was standing in the corner, surrounded by many good onmitsus. Okina came his direction with a parental smile on his lips. His right hand came to the boy's shoulder and he finally spoke._

" _Shinomori Aoshi is to be the new Okashira."_

_Aoshi felt his stomach turn. HIM? But he was barely a child. There were many brave men that would fit that position._

_Makimachi-sama nodded and also smiled fondly at the boy. He walked with great difficulty up to Aoshi and placed his hand on the other side of his shoulder._

_His voice filled the air: " Oniwabanshuu, here stands the new almighty Okashira Shinomori Aoshi."_

_Everyone was delighted. He was merely surprised._

_When all the others were gone and Aoshi was alone at the Castle gardens, Okina came to him once more._

_The boy kept his purple scarf very near his mouth for it was a very cold winter night. The wind blew strong, making the trees that still managed to keep some few leaves rustle violently. His long hair swung with the freezing wind as he gazed up to the pale crescent moon in a midnight blue winter sky._

" _Aoshi."_

_The boy turned his head to face the older man a meter far from him, looking at the icy lake ahead of them._

" _You are truly a genius. We are all very happy you are the new Okashira. You have all the qualities this position requires even being so young. That is the best in you, Okashira, we all trust you with our lives. You were born to shine in the shadows, your beautiful mind will make you great. It is for this beautiful mind, spirit, courage and leadership, this servant of yours bows."_

_Aoshi didn't know what to do. Amidst that icy winter landscape, there was Okina, his mentor, bowing before him. He glanced at the old man for several seconds and finally understood. _

xXx

The bath was at least relaxing. Misao sighed and decided it was time to leave the water once her fingers were becoming wrinkled. Her eyes surveyed the surroundings and she was truly amazed by all the things Megumi had: essences, oils, fine western soaps, creams and many other smelly things.

" Boy, that should be what they call feminine." If it were in better times, she would try all of them only to draw Aoshi-sama's attention. But now it was different. Everything was different.

She peered into her rucksack for clean warm clothes. One of her usual gi would do just fine. She looked at the immense mirror the doctor kept into the bathroom and saw she was not… feminine. Not the way the doctor was. Misao got a nearby hairbrush and slid it on her long long hair. As an automatic gesture, her slender fingers begun working on the usual long braid but she stopped right in the middle. Smiling sadly, she undid the braid and straightened the strands of her black hair, not as silken as the doctor's one, she noticed. Only then she realized she really never tried to look appealing to his eyes whereas Megumi was always a sight for sore eyes.

Carefully, Misao looked for a scissor she had seen from the tub. Measuring and looking closely, she smothered the lower part of her hair: the texture was not as good as the other parts and it made her look less appealing if she kept her hair loose. Fine locks of hair hit the floor the next instant. The girl looked at herself reflected on the mirror and smiled. She looked better.

Feeling victorious, Misao opened the shoji door and walked outside. A gloomy thought came to her mind when she faced Megumi's bedroom door but she just dismissed it the second later. She walked confidently to the kitchen where she had hoped to find Aoshi-sama even though she could not feel his ki.

He was sat with his head between his hands, bowed over himself. As if getting out of the trance, Aoshi stiffened his body and came back to upright position, turning his head to glance at Misao.

" Aoshi-sama…"

She was different. More mature, more beautiful, smelling like… Megumi. Only her girlie gi didn't match with the image she was trying to display. Even her voice was softer when she called his name. and, she had cut her hair! Not too much, but it was unbraided and shorter.

"Sit down." He said and pointed a place for her to sit.

Misao tried to walk gracefully, as if she were floating above Earth as she had seen Megumi do all the time. Instead of long, strong strides, she walked in small steps as if she was wearing a tight kimono. Not that she had ever worn one, but she had heard other women saying so.

Aoshi stood up and went to the fire to get a bowl of soup. He came back to the table and put it in front of her.

" Have it. The carriage may be arriving anytime. It will take you to the dojo."

He didn't look at her while he was speaking, that she noticed. His voice was cold and distant as well as his eyes.

" I will bathe and remove these wet clothes but I will not take long at any rate."

It was true. He suddenly vanished from her sight and she could hear nothing of him. The girl started having the soup and for her surprise, it was absolutely delicious!

"When and how did he get to learn how to cook like this?" she mused. Sure, she knew Aoshi was very skilled, even in cooking but that was absolutely out of this world. Except for the Aoi-ya, she had only proven something so delicious at nice restaurants and… Megumi's food. She had to admit the doctor really knew what she was doing when it came to food. Misao looked at the soup sadly. " I will never make a good wife, not as good as she can be…". Megumi seemed too perfect: a nice profession, innumerous skills, a beautiful body and beautiful face, besides being elegant and mysterious… feminine… " I am no match for her…" she pouted.

Misao ended the soup and washed her bowl. For her surprise, Aoshi-sama was ready by the kitchen's door when she turned around.

" There is a carriage coming down the lane. You'd better get your bag for we are going to the dojo."

She did as he said. Her bag was already at the main room, he had brought it. Shortly after that, a knock was heard on the door. Aoshi opened it and saw a wet coachman.

" Sorry if I took long sir, this rain made the way difficult."

Aoshi only nodded. Then, he opened an umbrella and placed it above Misao's head.

She entered the carriage and he followed. She was visibly timid as he spoke to the man, saying the whereabouts of the dojo.

It was not that far, she knew. Aoshi was stoic, dressed in black, mysterious, arms carefully folded over his chest and closed eyes. She wanted to speak but she couldn't.

Soon after that, the carriage stopped and through the window, she could see they had already arrived at the dojo. Aoshi was the first to hop out of it and reopened the umbrella. Misao came out timidly.

" Wait here." He told the coachman.

And the two of them made the way to the porch of the dojo. It was not necessary to knock or anything. Kenshin must have sensed the girl's presence and alerted Karou that came beaming to receive them.

" Aoshi-san, Misao-chan!" she cheerfully opened her arms and embraced the girl. Misao smiled faintly.

Kenshin came right after and looked fondly at the girl. " Misao-dono, Aoshi-san."

Aoshi bowed to both of them and turned around, trailing his path back to the carriage.

Misao felt a sting into her heart. He was not staying. He was going back to Megumi's house.

" Aoshi-sama…" she cried out, being released from Kaoru's embrace.

" I shall come back by the morning. Goodbye, everyone."

With great sadness, she watched him go. He entered the carriage and the vehicle turned around, disappearing in the heavy rain.

" Come inside, Misao." Kaoru reached out a helping hand.

The dojo was always a good place for her but that time, she hurt so much… nobody asked her anything. Kaoru led her to the same room she had once stayed years ago. There was a futon already unfolded on the floor.

" Do you want anything to eat now or do you want it later?"

" I have already had dinner."

Kaoru smiled fondly once again. " Do you need a sleeping yukata?"

Only then occurred to her that she hadn't brought any sleeping clothes. Misao blushed hard. " Oh, yes. I forgot to bring mine."

As Kaoru left to get her a sleeping yukata, the girl sat on the futon and her eyes trailed the hem of the blanket. She had come all the way to Kyoto for him and now he was not wit her. She knew they had talked; she had made her point clear but he didn't feel the same, as she already suspected and never wanted to believe. Her eyes got filled with tears and before she could realize, a thick one fell and made the light blue of the blanket a richer shade.

Kaoru entered the room and saw Misao like that. She should have known of everything now. As if she were the girl's older sister, she sat beside her and embraced her fondly, patting Misao's head. " Don't cry for what you cannot change, Misao-chan."

Misao felt an urge to hold Kaoru back and she did just so. The yellow of the other woman's yukata made her feel warmer. She needed a friend, she needed someone she could speak to…

"Kaoru… I told him… I loved him. And I already knew the answer deep inside my heart but I wished it could have changed. Besides, as you may also know, he says Megumi carries his child in her womb."

Kaoru caressed the long strands of her loose hair. " I knew, we all knew."

The girl sighed. " As you know…please tell me something he wasn't able to tell me. Does he love her very much?"

Kaoru looked heavenwards. How could she answer that question? She really didn't know! He liked Megumi, she was sure, but was it love and had he changed because of the child?

" I don't know, Misao-chan. I truly don't know, not even Megumi knows…"

Misao identified pure sincerity in her voice. Not even Megumi knows it, she repeated the words to herself.

Kaoru pitied her. She seemed so defenseless there, crying and crying, sobbing, clinging to some left-over hope. She smoothed the strands of her loose hair and caressed the girl for long moments. Misao had had her hair cut and she had changed, not a little girl but a young woman suffering for love.

"You know, Misao, when you love someone, sometimes you have to let that person go. You can't ground him to you, you should want only his happiness. That was what Megumi did. She didn't accept his proposal and left him free to do whatever he pleased for she didn't want to make his days bitter. You should leave him free to decide."

The girl's eyes rounded. " Proposal?"

Kaoru realized she had told too much. Misao hadn't known of the whole story then. But now, she had to tell, Misao wouldn't let her go away without telling everything.

xXx

Aoshi reentered the house and everything was as silent as when he had left. It was time to face Megumi again and he hoped she could be calmer that time. He walked slowly and silently to her room and pushed the shoji door aside.

His eyes widened in surprise.

" What are you trying to do?"

Startled, Megumi looked at him. " Oh, I hadn't heard you around…"

She was trying to get out of bed, it was obvious. The doctor saw the blue vial on his hands and smiled.

" Good you brought it." She tried once again to leave the bed but it seemed her legs were too weak for that.

Aoshi materialized in front of her with a serious expression in his eyes.

She tried not to look at him, dodging his stern look at her figure.

" I am fine, I assure you. I just want to take a bath."

She felt strong arms being placed around her body and when she blinked she was not in the bed anymore.

" Aoshi-san, what…?" she tried to fight.

" I will take you there." His voice was almost glacial.

He passed by the doorframe and entered the bathroom, still carrying her and standing right beside the tub.

" Don't tell me you are going to bathe me…" she sounded annoyed.

"Lift the hem of your kimono up to your thighs." He demanded.

" WHAT?" she thought he could only be kidding. " Listen, Aoshi…"

But he cut her in by placing her into the hot water even though she was dressed up, maneuvering his hands and arms in a way that he lifted the hem of her kimono and supported her not to fall or lose balance.

"Call me when you are done." He said and slid the shoji shut.

Megumi sighed but didn't protest anymore, why taking her time in protesting since Aoshi was so stubborn?

He went to her bedroom to check on the bed. There was a blood stain on the sheets but it wasn't really big. She had an almost six month pregnancy, so, that bleeding wouldn't really endanger the baby's life, as far as he was concerned, unless it happened again. He removed he dirty sheets from the bed and placed clean perfumed ones. Shortly after that, he could hear her voice calling him.

It only took a second for him to arrive at the bathroom's door.

" May I come in?" he asked

" Yes…" her annoyed voice answered.

He didn't mind she was annoyed, he was doing that for his child. She had gotten out of the bathtub and was sat on a low seat with closed eyes. She crouched and once again carried her into his arms to her bed.

She noticed he had taken care of everything. The sheets had been replaced and he had placed all the pillows in a position that she could feel more comfortable.

"Sweet…" she thought.

Aoshi bowed slowly so that her body would softly touch the mattress. Megumi had wrapped her arms around his neck and now she had courage to look into his eyes. She had thought better and he was truly caring. She knew she was now safe on the bed but even like that, she didn't remove her arms from around his neck not did he move behind. She eyed him for long seconds, straight into his eyes as if she could read his feelings and his reasons. For one moment, if she were better, she would just scare him by trying to pull him to the bed. Better, pull him over her on the bed. But she didn't. She only smirked when she imagined that.

" I will bring you food." He stated.

Only then she let go of his neck and he stood up and walked to the kitchen. Meanwhile, she got a bit of the powder of the blue vial and put it into her mouth. Aoshi returned shortly after that with a tray containing tea and soup. He placed it on her lap and then stepped behind to attach himself to the wall.

Megumi could not really tell she was hungry but the soup smelled very good. Besides, she knew she had to eat and behave so that herself and the baby could recover.

She started having her meal under the blue gaze of his.

" Where is she?" she sounded tired after all.

" At the dojo." He responded in a low and quick voice.

She asked no more. She only hoped he hadn't been so harsh on the girl.

When she was over, he took the tray away and came near her to check on her temperature. His strong hand came to her forehead and lifted her feathery bangs. His hand lingered there for some seconds, then, he took it away and went to the drawer, from where he took a futon.

Aoshi unfolded the futon on the floor, near the bed.

Megumi arched an inquiring brow to him as he came to her to make her lie down.

"Isn't it more comfortable up here?" she mocked and blinked.

"Megumi…" he thought, kidding and teasing even in the worst hours. He didn't answer her tease. He made her lie down and went to the futon himself.

" You may be the doctor here but I will make sure nothing will happen to you."

xXx

Long twisting chapter. I hope you didn't get too confused with this one and I hope I was not that messy! And the most important: I hope the conversation between Aoshi and Misao didn't sound lame! So, I am waiting for your reviews… gosh, I am apprehensive.

Once again, the lyrics were from Ghost Love Score by Nightwish.

Ladie Galadriel: you said you hate to see Misao hurting… well, it was a bit impossible here, right?

Yvonne: so, nothing bad really happened to Megumi… yet… ok, MAYBE I am teasing…

Rowan23: thank you VERY MUCH! I am updating not that soon, but it is an update, uh?

Leila: Yahiko is just the jester in this story… tee hee. Yeah, I know it was a terrible choice this one I made to confront Aoshi and Misao now. This is why I am so afraid I haven't done any lame thing and that it could sound plausible. I wouldn't want to ruin this part EVER. Well, I have two drawing now, but my artwork is so terrible I am afraid/ashamed to post it online anywhere!


	38. Against The Wall

Chapter XXXVIII- Against The Wall

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer applies.

XxXxXx

Megumi woke up several times during the night and it didn't matter what time was it, when she turned to the right, she could always see Aoshi's blue eyes on her direction.

Aoshi knew the night would be long and it truly was. He emptied his head from the thousand problems and dilemmas he had to face and kept on watching Megumi the entire night.

xXx

Misao had heard patiently to everything Kaoru had to tell. She had also accepted the hugs and the sympathy her friend had to offer. She was feeling so battered, so useless… all her efforts, all her time, everything had been wasted. But he was the one she had always always loved so much. There was a slight feeling of being betrayed but as she listened to the other woman speaking and clarifying things, things Aoshi could never say, she understood better.

In the end, when she had cried all her tears, when Kaoru had firmly held her head, when she had listened to everything that had been untold, she closed her eyes. She just wanted to rest her head.

Kaoru watched as Misao's expression was getting lighter and lighter as her tears were flowing from her eyes and as words were coming out of her mouth. She had her reasons, Kaoru knew, but there was something different. Misao had also restrained a pile of emotions towards Aoshi, she had not told him everything she wanted to say, but she thought it was the best to do. When the girl slept, Kaoru placed her head oh the pillow and covered her petite body.

"What an ordeal!" she sighed.

xXx

Aoshi was not tired even though he hadn't slept that night. He could not have slept even if he wanted to, his brain wouldn't allow him such luxury.

Megumi, on the other hand, was immersed under all the blankets on the bed, sleeping and apparently safe. And would Misao also be safe?

He knew it would take much longer for the doctor to wake up and he only wanted her to rest.

After bathing, Aoshi prepared breakfast for two people. He couldn't take his thoughts from Misao though.

He had vaguely sipped some tea but he hadn't left the table until, at the expected time, a familiar timid knock was heard on the front door.

He knew who it was. Aoshi walked patiently to answer it tough.

A big pair of jade eyes looked at him, half timid, half scared.

" Shinomori-sensei." She bowed.

Aoshi nodded. Why had those eyes to be exactly like hers? He moved so that the girl could come inside.

" How is Takani-sensei this morning?" she asked, sounding very worried.

Aoshi sighed. " Still sleeping."

"Oh." She tucked some strands of hair behind her ear. " But… your child, sensei…"

Aoshi turned his back to her. The dark blue of her kimono was exactly the same shade Misao loved.

" She says the child is out of danger."

Saeko didn't know what to do. Shinomori Aoshi was much more distant, much vaguer that morning. Also, Takani-sensei would not be working that morning after yesterday events, she was sure. So, that morning there was no room for her in that house. Anyway, she was glad the woman doctor was better and apparently out of danger.

"Shinomori-sensei, I just came to see if Takani-sensei was doing better."

But Aoshi didn't seem to be fully listening to her, his eyes narrowed to the bedroom's direction.

"Megumi" he whispered.

Listening carefully, Saeko could hear muffled stumps. Better, steps, footsteps getting nearer.

"I would say Megumi is no longer sleeping." He stated coldly.

Aoshi moved as if he floated over the wooden floor, making his black hair and dark clothes turn into a shadow. Saeko heard a shoji door being pushed and a pale female hand was placed on the outside, reaching for some support.

Megumi only saw a ghost pass in front of her eyes, a tall black shadow was placed in front of her and when she blinked again, she could see and recognize the shade of his skin and the indefectible storm blue of his eyes.

"Aoshi-san."

He was fast. Both his hands were placed around her shoulders, wrinkling the thin fabric of her sleeping yukata.

"Resting would only do you good." His remark was dry and cold, as usually.

She almost blushed. " I know… but it is that I heard you talking outside."

His eyes shifted to the corridor where a shy girl was not standing. She waved timidly with a small smile on her lips. " Good morning, Takani-sensei."

Megumi eyed the petite young woman dressed in dark blue with her hair carefully braided right there, waving to her. She smiled in return and also waved.

"Saeko-chan!"

Only then Saeko could really notice. With a thin sleeping yukata, Megumi's belly was really sticking out! She tried to be discrete so that the others wouldn't realize. Yet, she was so beautiful! The pregnancy was well advanced and she had managed to hide it under all those layers of clothes.

"Working is not recommended to you today, Megumi." Aoshi stated.

"I know." She lowered her eyes. "But I am not that bad to be lying on the bed for the whole day. It gives me pain…" she pouted as if she were a small child.

He shrugged. It would really cause her more muscle pain if she were lying on the bed.

"I came to visit you, Takani-sensei, to know if you were doing well." The girl twisted her fingers under the long sleeves of her kimono, a clear display of shyness.

Megumi's expression tendered. She pasted a big gentle smile on her face and walked slowly to the girl. She placed her arm around the girl's arm and intended to drag her to the kitchen.

"Come and have breakfast with us, the food is smelling so good!" she said cheerfully while the girl, taken by surprise, was trying to find some balance again.

"Thank you, Takani-sensei, but I have already had breakfast! It is so god to see you are fine! I am at your disposal."

"Oh, no, take it as a free day." She blinked.

Saeko smiled, trying not to overlook at Megumi's belly. "So, I guess I will have time to do some errands mother has been asking me to do."

Saeko bid farewell and Aoshi accompanied her to the door.

The morning seemed lighter and brighter. When he was back, he found Megumi already on the table with a smile on her lips. He entered and her dark eyes shifted to him but the smile shone perfect on her lips.

He said nothing, only sat on the chair and observed nonchalantly as she ate calmly.

"I suppose you are not going to the hospital today either." He spoke.

Megumi's smile vanished from her lips the very second and she also stopped eating. She couldn't go to the hospital that day, she had just bled again, and she had to rest.

" No." her voice was weak and timid.

She placed the chopsticks on the table and looked thoughtful. What would she say that time?

"But… I have to inform them I am not working for a couple of days." Her voice was too low to an ordinary person to hear but Aoshi could hear it pretty well…

"As you should not leave, I volunteer to do it."

She smiled fondly at him. " Thank you"

"Excuse me." He said and got up. " There are issues I have to solve so, I must hurry."

She nodded and watched him go inside to change clothes most probably. She didn't mind standing up for a long while. She just stood motionless into the kitchen, feeling, trying to feel.

Aoshi dressed one of the suits. It didn't matter to him which one that was, they were all dark and looking the same. In front of a mirror, he adjusted the knot of his leaden colored tie and ran a comb through the black strands of his hair. He looked at his face reflected under morning light. He was looking restless, but that was only for himself. To the others, he should be looking cold and impassionate, as usual. His eyes seemed to borrow the leaden color of his tie into its shine. There was so much to be done yet.

He walked past the hallway and saw Megumi standing into the kitchen, keeping things from breakfast on their right places.

" Are you really fine?" he asked.

She looked behind and smiled to him. "Yes. You do not need to worry." She blinked.

Aoshi almost sighed. He looked down and stepped forward not before telling a couple of words to her.

" I will not take long."

She smiled again. " So, I will be waiting you for lunch." She turned to the cupboard once again. There was only silence.

" And… Aoshi-san, don't bother. The baby is moving." She beamed.

Aoshi nodded. He could almost smile that time to hear his child was alive and fine. He opened the door and walked outside.

As he had stated, the morning was pretty bright although the sky was a bit cloudy. The weather was not hot but it wasn't cold either, only that the air was filled with rain smell yet.

People were already on the streets, walking up and down the roads, smiling, carrying packages, walking to work and there were kids too, some going to school, other going to their dojos. He followed a group of students he knew where they were bound to. The boys walked happily, blabbering gibberish, laughing, expecting a lot from their classes that morning.

The gate of the dojo was coming at sight and Aoshi didn't rush, he walked calmly, nonchalantly, as if floating above the ground. He let all the boys cross the gate first and kept a certain distance from them. He saw Yahiko coming from the inside holding a bamboo sword and leading the boys to the inside of the dojo. Only then he crossed the gate. There wasn't anyone at sight at the moment but he knew she was coming. So, Kaoru showed up on the door, as he had predicted. She widened her blue eyes to him and greeted him with a smile.

"Aoshi-san, good morning."

"Good morning." He said in a low voice and approached.

Kaoru knew why he was there. " Misao is ending her breakfast. You can go inside and talk to her. I have to teach a class now, so pardon me."

He nodded and watched her enter the same door the boys had entered seconds ago. When she was gone, he stepped into the main house and walked silently. He knew where the kitchen was, as Kaoru had told, he could sense Misao in there.

She hadn't sensed him. She was on the table, having her breakfast all alone if it were not for Kenji playing by her side. She was still wearing a sleeping yukata, probably not hers. Her hair was braided once again as she usually kept it. He walked closer and she wouldn't have realized there was someone behind her if Kenji hadn't raised his eyes. Only then she turned behind.

"A-Aoshi-sama." She gasped.

He could have remarked that she should have felt him coming for se was a kunoichi but he didn't. She could not have felt him if he didn't want her to. The small Himura rushed and coiled himself into Misao's arms. She received him into her arms without taking her jade eyes from Aoshi.

"You look better today." He stated.

She half-smiled. " Yes. I slept well."

He was still standing only that now he was extremely close to her, his hands into his pockets, his disturbing blue gaze focused on something on the beyond nobody but him could tell. " You have to go back to Kyoto. Okina is worried."

She winced. " Jyia?" she looked down at Kenji and cuddled his head. "Or maybe it is you who does not want me here, Aoshi-sama." She said with her voice faltering.

Aoshi could have rolled his eyes, but he didn't. He stood motionless, not even his eyes blinked. " It is not so. I will take you myself back to Kyoto."

Her eyes grew wider. "So, are you also going back?"

He closed his eyes and tilted his head down. Then, he turned on his heels and started to trail back the way he walked inside. Misao accompanied him with her eyes, still waiting for an answer but it never came.

" I have to leave. We may be leaving in a couple of days."

She held Kenji closer to her as she watched, dumbfounded, Aoshi going away. He hadn't answered her question. Which probability would be true? Was he really leaving Megumi behind? After all she had heard from Kaoru last night, she didn't know what to think anymore.

xXx

Aoshi had many things to do that morning. He entered the Headquarters and sat on his table for long minutes, thoughtful. He leaned back on his hair and ran his strong hands through his black hair. He was feeling tired. Too tired for a summer morning. After signing a pile of papers he had to, after reading lots of assignments, he heard a knock on his office door.

"Yes?" he asked.

A faltering voice of a young male came of the outside. " Shinomori-sama. There is someone here who wants to talk to you. He is called Fujita Gorou-san, from the police."

Aoshi knew that name well. It was Saitou. So, the wolf had come back to Tokyo.

"Let him in" his voice was demanding.

The very second, Aoshi watched the doorknob being twisted and the door swung open. A tall, black haired man stepped inside with his deadly amber eyes always narrowed. He looked straight to Aoshi and walked slowly.

"Please, sit down." Aoshi showed him the chair placed right across from him. Saitou did just so.

The two men watched one another for some seconds until Saitou smirked." Always the same Shinomori. I see you are doing well."

"Aa."

His smirk widened. " So, I will be straight forward. There was a rebellion in the jail and some men were dead, others ran away." He stopped to check what impact that sentence would have on Aoshi. Bur Aoshi just looked as uninterested as ever, eying him with his cold blue eyes.

Saitou laughed. " My point is: Takeda Kanryuu can be dead as well as he can be out there, we still do not know."

Aoshi's eyes narrowed. Saitou knew it meant something. It did. Aoshi hated remembering that man, he absolutely hated. "When was it?"

"I arrived in Tokyo yesterday but the accident happened a couple of months ago."

"A couple of months…" Aoshi repeated vaguely.

" Yes. So, I could have brought you either bad or good news."

Aoshi leaned forward, bracing his elbows on the wooden surface of the table, both hands clasped together and his chin resting on the top of them.

"Is there a chance he is dead?"

"Yes, Shinomori. The problem is that it is too difficult to identify the carbonized corpses. But the policemen did find one that could match Takeda's appearance."

Aoshi sighed. Damned Takeda.

Saitou stood up and looked at Aoshi. " Well, I must go now, Shinomori. I apologize for you hadn't known it before. But the police is really believing he is dead. You haven't had any news of him, right?"

"No."

"So, that is a good sign."

He turned his back to the onmitsu and walked to the door. He placed his gloved hand on the knob and before opening the door, he glanced behind so that Aoshi could see his profile.

"Oh, I almost forgot. Congratulations, Shinomori."

Aoshi blinked. "Congratulations on what?"

Saitou smirked. " You and the fox lady. Your first son."

"Aa." Aoshi narrowed his eyes as he watched the older man disappear and close the door behind him.

Would it be possible that Takeda Kanryuu was really dead?

He leaned back on his chars and had his agile fingers massaging his temples. He closed his eyes for several minutes, concentrating on everything that was still to come. Should he tell what he had just listened from Saitou to Megumi?

Opening his eyes, Aoshi glanced at the clock standing at the corner of the room. One of those large western clocks the government men had spread all over the building. Ten- forty. He remembered he had volunteered himself to go to the hospital and talk to Matsuyama-sensei about Megumi; besides, he had also told her that he would be back for lunch and he was intending to arrive before lunch. Closing his drawers and making sure everything was in its place, Aoshi closed the curtains of his room and walked on the hallway. The building was silent and he found nobody on his way out.

The weather outside was even hotter that time. Nonetheless, rain still impregnated the air and the made its presence clear on the surroundings. Aoshi knew well the path to where he was going and in twenty minutes, he was into the reception area of Miksi hospital.

He walked decidedly on the white floor and asked the nurse if he could talk to Matsuyama-sensei. As the nurse made her way inside, he waited patiently, eyes closed, being totally nonchalant. In few minutes, the smiley nurse came back to where he was.

"Please, Shinomori-san, follow me to Mastuyama-sensei's room." She smiled and bowed, leading the away the same second he nodded.

They walked through a long white corridor full of closed wooden doors. One of the last ones had a sign with the doctor's name on it. The nurse smiled and opened the door.

The black haired man left his cushioned chair and came to meet him at the door. Aoshi bowed and he did the same, closing the door behind them as Aoshi came in. Smiling, Matsuyama-sensei led him to an armchair placed in front of his desk. But he was trying hard to fight anxiety and ask about Megumi, he was dying to know if she was fine after the other day events.

"Sit down, please, Shinomori-san."

Aoshi made himself comfortable and then, closing his eyes, he cleared his throat.

" I came here because I need to talk about Megumi."

Matsuyama-sensei smiled, entwining his fingers.

"So, be my guest, Shinomori-san."

He opened his blue eyes to look carefully at the doctor. His room smelled like wood. It was darker than the other parts of the hospital he had ever seen. Much darker. And filled with books on various shelves.

As Aoshi's features hardened, Matsuyama-sensei worried and remembered of the previous day. He leaned forward with a curious gleam in his eyes, trying to swallow his big worriment.

"I do hope she is better today. Yesterday I took her home for she fainted."

"Megumi-san will not come to work today, sensei." Aoshi stated blankly.

If he were not a self-controlled man, Matsuyama Nobori would have shaken. However, he was not aware that before him sat a trained man, able to recognize the slightest change in anyone.

"And, how is she? What is the problem?"

And if the other man could read minds, he would have realized hesitation in Aoshi. Should he tell the truth? By the voice of the other man, by his behavior, it was clear he was in love with Megumi. Did he have the right? Did he? Did the other man have that right? If he were given to displays of emotion, he would have clenched his fists at that time.

"She is pregnant."

Matsuyama-sensei felt as if he would fall from the world. A punch straight on his stomach that led him to an infinite breathlessness. And he knew a drop of sweat rolled down his forehead as his mouth went dry.

"P-pregnant…" he echoed and tried to focus his vision on the man before him. He could ask how, but it would have sounded too stupid. " Congratulations, Shinomori-san." His hand came nervously to his forehead to wipe the revealing sweat drop.

"Thanks" he mumbled. Aoshi narrowed his eyes. That man really loved Megumi.

Trying to dismiss any unwanted feeling, Matsuyama-sensei gave Aoshi a sad smile.

"She can be far from the hospital as much time as she feels it is necessary."

Aoshi nodded. "Thank you. I will tell her this. But she loves her work, so I don't believe she will be away for a long time."

"No, Shinomori-san, I, we all at this hospital admire Takani-sensei and want her at full health here."

" Thank you." Aoshi almost whispered.

Seconds lingered between the two of them while Aoshi analyzed the lost expression in the other man's face. Then, he decided to leave. Standing up, Aoshi seemed to have brought the other man back to reality. Matsuyama-sensei blinked several times and pasted an apologetic smile on his face.

"So, are you already leaving?" he asked, sounding embarrassed.

"Aa." Aoshi continued his way to the door. " I have spoken what I was asked to."

Matsuyama-sensei rushed to get to Aoshi and open the door. " Thank you for coming, Shinomori-san."

Aoshi merely nodded and proceeded to the outside. But, for his surprise when he was at the end of the hallway, he heard the doctor coming running after him. He slowered his pace and waited.

Matsuyama-sensei stopped by his side, almost panting. " Shinomori-san" he bowed. " I… I would like to … uh, ask you something."

Aoshi did not answer. He only waited to listen to what the man had to ask him. Matsuyama did not raise his eyes to look at Aoshi at any time. If he had done so, the other man would have realized how red his face was and maybe he could have listened to his heart pumping. " If you would allow me… I… I would… I would like to… to visit Takani-sensei… this afternoon, if it is possible."

Silence. It was as if Aoshi did not even breathe. Matsuyama-sensei felt all the blood in his body boiling and moving weird through his veins. " I… I am sorry, I beg you pardon, Shinomori-san for being so rude and indiscreet...I really."

"Aa." Aoshi echoed cutting the other man off. " I think Megumi-san will appreciate your visit a lot." He said without looking at the doctor.

Matsuyama-sensei saw only blackness and heard Aoshi's distant steps on the hallway. When the other man was gone, he smiled. A rueful and sad, but loving smile.

xXx

Megumi smiled as the sunbeams reached the deck of her house. The lunch was halfway done already and she was feeling much better. Her perfume was in the whole house and she decided to sunbathe for a while both to have her long hair dry and to fell a bit warmer inside.

Sure that nobody was watching her, Megumi let the kitchen door open and sat on the wooden deck, stretching her legs and raising her head to the sky. It felt nice. The rain smelled a bit yet and all her backyard was green. Closing her eyes, her right hand loosened the neck of her yukata so that her shoulders and collarbone could be exposed to sunlight. Then, she lifted the skirt of her yukata and her calves and even a bit of her creamy thighs could be touched by the light. Relaxing. Relaxing.

Aoshi walked down the lane with a million things in his head. Thanks heaven Megumi's house was now only a few steps away. It seemed incredible, but that part of the city was less hot, the air was less thick but yet, it was hot.

He opened the door making no sound. Not because he meant to do it but because years and years as a shinobi led him to always behave like that. As soon as he stepped inside, he let out a silent breath and removed his jacket, his agile fingers working in undoing the knot of his tie and then, opening the first button of his white shirt.

That smell. Perfume. And food. Both smells coming from the kitchen. And his mouth was dry, he needed to have water. Walking soundlessly, he reached the kitchen door and his eyes identified the first source of smells. There was food being baked. Looking a bit more to the side, the kitchen door was open and she was at the deck. The second source of smells - perfume.

Aoshi's expression could have saddened when he saw her smile and her closed eyes. So beautiful in the sun. So… enchanting. As she tilted her head behind, her long hair could almost touch the floor, falling from over the creamy skin of her shoulders. Shinning.

He approached her without saying a word. His expression could have saddened when he saw her smile and her eyes closed. And her hair… the nice perfume was coming from it. What if he could indulge himself a touch, a fast one? He would have touched her hair, brought those black strands near his face, to his nostrils and smell them, fill himself with that inebriating smell, kiss them and let them fall, slip through his fingers.

She opened her eyes slowly. And she saw Aoshi's figure standing too close from her. As if waking up from a nightmare, she abruptly moved and tried to cover herself as fast as she could, covering her legs and closing the upper part of her yukata, totally startle. Something flickered into his eyes and he turned his back to her.

"I apologize. I did not mean to scare you."

Recovering herself and standing up, Megumi smiled again. " Oh, you did not. I was only distracted."

Aoshi's eyes shifted to the grass outside and Megumi's ones to the floor. She bit her lip after several seconds and smiled again. " By the way, lunch is almost ready."

He nodded.

After few minutes, both of them sat down to eat. Aoshi put a small piece of that kind of vegetable pie, a new recipe Megumi had prepared, into his mouth. It was delicious. She really knew how to cook. He looked at her.

Realizing his eyes on her, she blushed and giggled. " What? Is this bad?"

He shook his head. " Absolutely not."

Should he tell her now?

"Megumi, I have gone to the hospital today and spoken to Matsuyama-sensei. He said there is no problem and you should stay away from work as long as you find necessary."

Her eyes rounded and her hand stopped moving with the chopsticks halfway from her mouth. "Is it so?"

"Aa. And… Matsuyama-sensei is coming to visit you… this afternoon."

If she had any food in her mouth that time, she would have choked hard. " Is… is he?" she asked with a faltering voice. She was blushing hard. Trying to dismiss her shyness, she hid her face in her hair and behind the sleeve of her yukata.

Aoshi narrowed his eyes in suspiciousness. What was that he saw her hiding? Was it really a smile or were his eyes fooling him this time? What kind of smile was that? He decided not to ask, maybe he did not really want to discover.

xXx

OMG…. I thought I would NEVER be able to end this chapter… /sighs….

ennov: sorry… I took too long to update. Cause the other chapters had been written for a long time and this one I really had to sit down and write! And now I have cable internet so MSN is not letting me write anymore/shoots msn

Ladie Galadriel: a PITY you stopped writing, girl! And THANK YOU VERY MUCH for praising last chapter/bows and thank you very much for your long review, I loved it! I hope you enjoy this chapter!


	39. One Last Goodbye

Chapter XXXIX- One Last Goodbye

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer applies.

XxXxXx

Kaoru was not worried if that would not be a proper time for a visit. She did not even bother going that way, that time, right after lunch. Her worriment and her friendship were more important, she thought so.

Aoshi rose from the spot in which he had been sat for half an hour. He knew who was coming and he knew angst. His heartbeats denied his stoic features and he was already on the door before the person could even knock.

Kaoru lifted her hand to knock and for a nanosecond she didn't knock on Aoshi. She let go a thin scream as she didn't expect anyone to answer the door before she knocked. Blinking several times and withdrawing her hand to near her chest, Kaoru blushed.

"I am sorry, Aoshi-san." She said apologetically.

Aoshi just eyed her from his taller position, he wanted to ask what could have been wrong.

"Kaoru-san, are you worried?"

Kaoru winced and looked away. " Hm…" she bit her lip. "One cannot hide things from you, ne, Aoshi-san?"

"What's wrong with Misao?" his tone was uninterested but he truly put all his attention into that question.

"Misao? Oh, nothing. She is just fine." Kaoru smiled and walked inside as Aoshi stepped aside for her to pass. When he had closed the door, her voice lowered several levels. "It is Megumi. I came to see her."

Aoshi could almost sigh in relief. "Megumi is fine. She is in her bedroom. Go there if you like."

He knew she would go so he returned to the very place in the room while Kaoru thanked him and walked through the hallway.

There was absolutely no noise coming from the bedroom. Kaoru knocked.

"Megumi, it is me, Kaoru." And she waited.

Only then she listened to some fabric rustling followed by muffled steps. In no time, Megumi slid the shoji open and smiled to the other woman.

"Come inside!"

Kaoru felt relieved to see her friend was looking good and smiling. Into the room, she saw Megumi must have been looking at things that were into a dark wooden box that was now placed over the white sheets of her luxurious bed.

The doctor led the way to the bed and sat on it, leaning her back against its head.

"Sit down, please." She told to Kaoru.

A bit shy, Kaoru approached the bed and sat down near the edge, facing Megumi.

"So, I see you are fine." She smiled.

The doctor's eyes lingered on the wooden box for some seconds. Then, her pale fingers came to her eyes and she dried one small tear that threatened falling.

"Yes. I was looking at… things… from my family." Her fingers slid on the top of the box and she shifted her eyes to Kaoru. "I am fine, truly."

The younger woman smiled. "Good. Because I was told of what happened yesterday and all."

"Everything turned out ok, it seems." She answered smiling.

xXx

More than half hour had passed since the two women were locked into the bedroom. Aoshi stood up and gathered the many sheets of papers he had been reading, putting them under his arm, heading to his bedroom to keep them and retrieve his swords. He wanted to polish them.

Walking silently by the force of habit, he passed by Megumi's door. He didn't mean to hear anything as he walked fast and those times he cursed his trained ears for listening when he didn't want to.

"And now?" Kaoru asked sounding excited.

He heard Megumi let out a breath as if she would talk of something annoying now. " Aoshi? No more." She breathed. "Besides, I have a new love, someone else to love." He could not let pass the emotion on her voice as she spoke the last words.

He had to stop on his track. He did not want to listen, he did never mean to listen any of those. His gaze remained lost for several seconds until he heard the two women were walking into the room. With an amazing speed, he entered his room and closed the door. Everything in absolute silence. Slowly, he walked to the chest where he kept his two sheathed swords and retrieved them. What was that working on his mind? Why did his senses have to work like that? Why his… feelings were playing him fool? Anger flowed into his blood. Anger and unhappiness.

xXx

After Kaoru was gone, Megumi entertained herself in preparing delicious little sweets for the tea. She was told she would have a guest. Aoshi was nowhere to be seen, she had already looked for him into his room and even outside.

Megumi listened to someone walking down the lane and approaching her house, passing through her garden. But she waited until the person knocked on the door.

"Good afternoon, Takani-sensei." The man dressing a grey suit bowed deeply before her.

"Good afternoon, Matsuyama-sensei." Megumi also bowed and smiled. "Come inside."

He was visibly timid that time.

"Please, sit down." Megumi showed him the cushions placed around a low table.

He nodded and did as she told.

"Just give me a minute, I will bring some tea and something for us to eat." Megumi excused herself and walked into the kitchen returning from there just some seconds later, carrying a tray with tea stuff and some sweets.

When she sat down, Matsuyama-sensei placed a beautifully wrapped box on the table.

"It is for the tea" he said smiling.

Megumi smiled back. "Oh, thanks a lot." Her white fingers gracefully worked on unwrapping the box and opening it.

"Sweets!" she smiled. "Thank you once again, Matsuyama-sensei."

The other doctor could almost blush. "You are always welcome, Takani-sensei."

Surprisingly, he could not take his eyes from the woman. She looked like a goddess, shinning into her golden yellow kimono and white smock. The man doctor mentally stabbed himself. Not only she was a married woman but she was also pregnant. He could not forgive this lack of respect of his side. Megumi, on the other hand didn't seem to have noticed anything not even the struggle that was taking place with the man right before her.

xXx

Outside, Aoshi decided to take a walk. He would be extremely useless in that house that time. However, he decided not to go far and stay on the neighborhood. One hour and a half later, when the afternoon shade was beginning to get richer of gold and red, he decided to return home. From the porch, he could listen to Megumi giggling and to Matsuyama's happy tone. He opened the door and his presence seemed to have frozen everything.

Immediately, Matsuyama-sensei stood up and bowed deeply in front of him.

"Shinomori-san."

Aoshi nodded. "Never mind my presence. I do not intend to stay or disturb." And he walked into the hallway, disappearing into one of the rooms without one word to the woman who sat wordlessly looking at him.

Standing, Matsuyama-sensei looked through the window and faked a surprised look. "Oh, I suspect I lost track of time, Takani-sensei. I am sorry." He said with an apologetic smile.

Megumi also stood up. "No, there was nothing wrong with it, I assure you! I even said I had lots of fun this afternoon."

The man beamed inside and his smile widened. "Well, Takani-sensei, we truly wish you get well. And sure, we will be waiting for you at the hospital when everything is done. For now, as a doctor, I must just reinforce what you already know about pregnancy."

Megumi felt her cheeks go pink and hot. " Th-thanks, Matsuyama-sensei. I will take care."

Aoshi could not help listening to the end of their conversation. She was shy, she was ashamed of her state. He wanted to leave, he needed to leave. Through the window and around the house, he saw the doctor walking the stone path of the garden, a happy smile pasted on his face. He could also see Megumi as she closed the door with a similar smile. He wanted to go and just show up in front of the man, but he didn't. He took the opposite direction and vanished, jumping on the rooftops.

xXx

For long long hours Megumi waited for Aoshi so they could have supper together but he did not come. She went outside many times and looked for him on the surroundings. She stood by the window with eyes focused on the lane but he never came. When it was late enough, she decided to go to sleep.

And even before the sun had risen, Megumi woke up and walked around the house silently looking for him but he was not there. His futon was perfectly folded and put aside on the tatami.

If he were not Aoshi she would have feared for his life. But… now… she only got sad he was not there that night.

However, two blue depths were masked into the cold night air and the immense darkness of the porch, right under the window of her bedroom. Right there in case something happened to her.

xXx

One week had already passed.

Everyday before going to work, Aoshi had made his way to the dojo to visit Misao. That morning, however, after he was gone, the girl had a different gleam into her jade eyes.

"It is tomorrow." She beamed and walked jumping around the house, playing with Kenji.

Intrigued with such display of happiness, Sanosuke approached the girl.

"What important thing is happening tomorrow, weasel girl?" he asked teasingly.

Nonetheless, Misao was so glad she did not fight Sanosuke, did not curse him, did not overreact, she plainly answered him "Aoshi-sama and I are going back home!"

Sanosuke kept on eying the girl for various seconds as she ran towards her room to, most probably, pack. Then, he shook his head and let go a breath.

xXx

She had had lunch all alone and now, right after she had left the bath, Megumi brushed her hair singing a tune to brighten her day. The brush came fast, mingling its whiteness with the silk blackness of her hair. It was just one of her lonely afternoons since Aoshi seemed to be swamped with work and she had nothing else to do than walking a bit on the morning sun and staying at home.

Right after she had laid the brush on the dresser, Megumi heard she had a visitor. Adjusting her obi, the woman doctor made her way to the door. When she opened it, she could not believe who was standing outside. Misao.

"Hi… Megumi-san." The girl spoke.

"Misao." Megumi couldn't help widening her eyes to such event. The two of them hadn't seen each other for a while and she never thought she would ever do so.

Megumi just looked blankly at the other woman's face. " Aoshi-san is… not here." She said hesitantly.

Misao almost giggled. "I know. I came to talk to you."

Of all things on Earth, that was what Megumi expected the least. " With me? Oh, come inside then."

Misao looked as childish as never. She walked around the house, her hands clasped together and behind her back.

"It is a beautiful afternoon." She said cheerfully.

"It… is…" Megumi echoed as she watched the girl roaming now into the kitchen and crossing the door to the deck. She doubted the girl had paid her a visit only to talk about the weather and so.

Misao smiled when she saw there was also a small garden behind the house. Everything seemed to have been taken care carefully for ages. The plants were of a vivid green and the colored small flowers were everywhere. Misao sat down on the deck in a place where the afternoon light could bathe her fully.

"Nice cozy deck, Megumi-san." She turned her head to face the older woman still standing up and towering her petite figure.

Those childish jade eyes looked at her whole figure. Megumi knew she had to sit down and talk to the girl although she had no idea of where that would take them. With much more difficulty than the girl, bracing on the wall and holding her belly- which was starting to weigh- Megumi sat down just across from Misao, the sunlight on her back.

After a short eye contact, Misao smiled.

"I suppose you already know why I am here."

Megumi blinked and kept herself serious. " No, I don't."

Misao pouted. "Well, I am going back to Kyoto tomorrow. With Aoshi-sama, remember?"

Megumi tried to be as calm as she could be, masking the impact the news had caused in her. She swallowed and did not let the girl realize her surprise. "Are you? Oh, yes, I had just forgotten it is already tomorrow."

Misao's left eyebrow lifted. " Oh. Ok."

Megumi's eyes shifted to the grass. She hadn't known any of these. She didn't know Misao would be already leaving not even that Aoshi was going with her. The next day.

"And I came here to tell you I don't actually hate you."

The last sentence made the doctor's eyes go back to the girl's face.

"But…" she pondered " It does not mean that I am healed."

"I see." Megumi whispered.

Misao looked to some small butterflies flying beautifully around some white small flowers on the garden and smiled. "I have accepted the situation. And I even find it amazing Aoshi-sama is going to have a child. I would love this child anyway for being part of him. And I won't deny now I am just excited to see his or her face."

Megumi gave her a slight smile. "I … feel better knowing you think this way."

"Anyway, has Aoshi-sama thought of names yet? Cause I have thought of a dozen… and I really wanted this baby to be a boy, cause I think he is going to be just a total knock-out like his daddy. Otherwise, a baby girl must be sweet too! I would make her into a kunoichi!"

Misao was not even paying attention to Megumi anymore. She was just talking about her plans, of how she would act towards the child, of how the child you look.

"Asuka-chan and I will have a great time when I teach ninjutsu! And Jiya will just love it too!"

Now the girl had even a name. Megumi felt too uncomfortable with that. Could Aoshi be thinking like this too? Because Misao totally deleted her from the child's life.

"Oh, and Shigure-chan could really learn a lot from his father, and from Jiya, of course, and I would buy him all sweets he could ever want!"

Misao stopped and giggled for a long period that seemed to have lasted for a whole lifetime according to Megumi. Misao had already picked the names. Or had Aoshi himself picked them and Misao, as sign of her devotion, was just repeating them?

After laughing and telling thousand plans, Misao looked at the horizon and winced. " I think it is time to go." She stood up.

As a good host, Megumi did the same. She had offered tea and sweets but Misao did not accept, Megumi even wondered if she had heard at all since she had been so carried away while talking.

Misao led the way to the garden without looking behind. When she was about to cross the gate, she turned around and smiled. " Take care of this chibi one."

"Have a nice trip back, Misao." Megumi echoed.

Misao looked at the surroundings and went running up the lane, disappearing the next second.

Megumi returned to the house and started preparing dinner. Aoshi should already be arriving soon.

As she chopped the vegetables, her brain could not stop processing all the things Misao had just told her. It was clear she was nothing but a belly. Someone who carries a child and after the birth, will be disposed. She was not disposable as they thought. Small hot tears filled her eyes and she wiped them with the sleeve of her kimono. So, they just had to wait for three months. Three more months and their lives would go back to eternal joy. But not hers.

Dinner was ready. Megumi sat down at the low table at the main room and braced her elbows on it, holding her head between her hands. Eventually, her elbows slid down and soon her torso, as much as her belly allowed her to, was resting against the hard wooden surface of the table, her right face over her arms. Her hair had fallen over her face and now cascaded down to the table too as she breathed. The afternoon light was dying slowly but Megumi had no will of standing up and lighting the lanterns or lighting a mere candle at all.

However, not long after that, a full square of dim light appeared over her, followed by a lean shadow. The amber light of the fading day even hurt her eyes. Someone had opened the door and she didn't even need to guess who it was. Aoshi. Slowly, Megumi moved her head over her arms so the chin touched the skin of her forearm. Yes. It was him. As if his arrival had the same significance of a fly coming through the window, she shifted her head back to the previous position.

Aoshi found strange no light was coming from the house once all the other ones were lighted and there were voices coming from the inside. Maybe, he thought, Megumi was not there. If not, where would she have gone at that time? However, when he had the door open, he saw a female figure half laid over the low table. Fearing the worst, he got stuck at the door but soon her face moved to see who had arrived and so he could breathe again.

"Megumi." He called.

He saw her right hand fingers had moved and now instead of stretched, they were curled into the sleeve of her kimono.

Calmly, the onmitsu walked to the woman after closing the door. The house was dark but he could see there was a lantern very near the table. He lighted it up and brought it to the table, placing it before Megumi's face. At the same second, the woman closed her eyes tight much probably because the light was hurting them.

"Megumi." He called again and that time her cinnamon eyes slit open and turned to him.

"What?" she said with a husky muffled voice. "Do not worry, there is nothing wrong with your child."

The last sentence was bitter and strong as if it contained some kind of poison. Aoshi kneeled by her side and narrowed his eyes to her trying to analyze and figure out what was happening.

"I did not mean it." He answered her in a serious tone.

Megumi abruptly rose from her position and walked away.

"I suppose you are not done packing." She said annoyed.

And then Aoshi understood. She had known it before he told her. He also stood up and walked near her, removing his jacket and undoing the knot of his tie.

"So, you know it."

She glanced at him from over her shoulder. "Misao paid me a visit. And you were not planning to tell me. Of course not. For you and your clan what the hell am I? Just a pouch, a belly, so why bother telling you are going away?" her voice raised several levels.

As if he were made of pure ice, never losing his temper, he came near. "I would tell you of course."

She turned to him all of a sudden, arms crossed, fists clenched so hard they were hurting the skin of her palms. " Oh sure, the right second you were walking away."

He breathed in. "If it were another times, I could understand the anger." He said bitterly and with a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

"WHAT?" she frowned "What do you mean with this Shinomori?"

He could say. Oh yes, he could. But he didn't want to sound stupid.

"Because I feel just like a trash, I feel I have no worth anymore, I think you see me as only a belly, only this, nothing more! And since a belly has no feelings, has nothing more than THE belly itself, one should not bother talking or doing whatever to it."

Aoshi observed as the woman walked dramatically in circles near the hallway. Breaking through the invisible barrier she had cast around herself, he spoke:

"Megumi… come with me."

She blinked several times as she placed her hands on her hips.

"What?" her voice lowered. " You are…"

"Inviting you to go with me." He said with his glacial tone as he kept on coming close.

She turned around and hid a mischievous smile behind her hair. "And why would I? Give me a good reason."

"I did not want you to stay here alone." he said plainly.

" Oh, now you come again, with the 'I' sentence. Don't you ever think of me, Aoshi?"

He was looking at her back. What did she want him to say?

"You have not been working at the moment…"

"Dinner is ready, I may inform you." The woman said bitterly, putting a period at their conversation.

She did not seem to listen. Megumi just walked away to her room and left him all alone at the main room.

xXx

He was almost done packing and it should be almost around midnight. He hadn't seen or heard Megumi since then. Wearing a white yukata, Aoshi sat down at the tatami and looked at the tickets he had bought the previous day. Three tickets. He didn't even want to know how she had come up with the ideas she had now, it did not matter. But Megumi had said Misao had paid her a visit. Most probably it was that.

He spared the clothes he would be wearing the next day and left them over the chest.

After a short meditation, Aoshi laid down flat on his futon but he did not cover himself. The window was open and he could listen to the crickets outside and to the nighttime birds. He closed his eyes and sighed.

Nobody would have realized there was another noise inside the house, but he did. He could even trail the sound. Small muffled steps coming to the direction of his room. Soon, the shoji slid open, but only enough to allow a body to pass.

Megumi walked on the tatami trying to be soundless and she would have succeeded if the person there were not Aoshi. With some effort, she sat down beside him. With eyes closed, he shifted to his left side and now she was looking at his face.

Megumi smiled sadly.

"Sleeping." She thought. "Good he manages to get some sleep."

Her delicate fingers brushed several of her feathery bangs aside and she sighed.

"Why does everything have to be so difficult?" she mumbled.

Scanning the bedroom, she was everything was prepared for his departure. All his clothes were already on the bags. However, she saw black clothes over a chest. Probably the ones he would wear the next day.

Megumi stood up and walked to the window. The night air was much cold that time. She decided to close it so that Aoshi would not catch a cold. As she turned to him once again, she saw a pair of eyes on her. Immediately, her own eyes shifted down and she blushed.

"I am sorry. I did not mean to disturb you." She said is a whisper "It is just that I guessed the window was open and came to close it."

He did not move. Still lying on his side, the feathery strands of black hair falling and framing his face and eyes, he moved his lips slowly.

" You did not wake me up."

Megumi froze. Those times, lying on the futon like that, he looked defenseless, he looked like a boy. The shine on his eyes were also genuine and amazing, enchanting. And no frowns. If she looked at him, he could see his white face perfectly, framed by the coal black strands of his straight hair that, due to his position, were falling over his forehead.

Slowly, Aoshi braced his arm on the futon and went to a sitting position. He looked at her. Plain coincidence they both wore white. He wanted to say something, anything to her that time, but not to fight at all.

" Are you sleepy?" that was the best he could try.

She shook her head without looking at him as if she were a bad girl about to be punished.

"I wanted to do this peacefully." His low voice reached her ears, making her lift her chin a bit so that she could have a better view of him.

"What do you mean?"

"I do not want you to hate me. I never did. Not even in the past." He said, still looking at her.

She hesitated. And then, timidly, her bare feet came forward and once again she was close to him. He was bracing his back on the wall behind him and she did the same, standing by his side, back on the wall, near the door.

" I don't."

He looked up to see her again but he could not see her eyes. Her bangs had fallen over them and shadowed them from his sight.

"I feel… glad." The last word seemed to have taken him a thousand years to say. " And, please, do not think you are just someone who carries a child, a belly, if I may use your words."

She bit her lip. Why was he saying this to her?

" I do not want you to carry hate for me or for my clan, I do not want you to feel anything bad for us, I am not worthy of any of your feelings, not even the worst of them. We do not deserve your pain, I do not deserve your pain."

A new pause from him. Megumi did not know what to do or what to say. She did not even know if she should breathe.

Noticing she would not say anything, Aoshi continued.

" And I thank for all the patience you always had, for you tried to be someone for me in the beginning. _I want you to be free of all the pain you hold inside. I know you tried to be who you couldn't be. You tried to see inside of me._ And I am the one to blame for all."

He stopped talking as he saw she was sliding down the wall to be closer to him. Her white tremble hand came to his face and he allowed himself to be touched. Yet, he could never see her eyes and he did not try to read her expression.

"Don't say such things of yourself. You are opening up, Aoshi. This means you changed and grew as a person. If you feel well the way you are now, I feel happy. The way you talk now is able to touch other people in a way I never thought you could touch. _I know you tried… to feel. _And you are not to blame for anything. There were no mistakes, it was only you." Her hand slid down from his face and she stood up again.

He had no more words to tell her that time and she seemed to have nothing to tell him as well. He merely watched and she walked, better, floated towards the door and walked outside, lingering for a mere second on the threshold and whispering:

"Because I loved you."

Aoshi could have dreamed of escaping that time. He let go of himself and his body rested heavily against the wall. He had changed a lot, he knew. He had opened up to whom he thought would have been important if he did so. He closed his eyes and his right hand came to his face to cover them.

_And now I'm leaving you_

_I don't want to go_

_Away from you_

As the morning grew brighter and the birds started singing outside, Megumi shifted on bed. She faced the window now, not the door. Buried under all her blankets, she had hardly slept at all. Anyway, she could smile at a small inner victory. She thought she was part of that new Aoshi; the one that was now leaving her.

Into his room, Aoshi changed his clothes after bathing. He had been up much early, he still had the last things to take care of and he wanted to arrive at the dojo really earlier because he knew Misao would take forever with her goodbyes. Also, he had one more thing to write, a small note. He sat with those sheets of paper and a brush and just opened his soul. However, the ending was pretty difficult. He stopped and thought, bringing the brush very near his chin.

"Because… because I …" He hesitated. No. He could not. He should not. Softening his expression, he laid the brush on the paper and decided.

But he was done now. All his things were gathered and he walked with them to the main room and placed his belongings in front of the door. But he could not leave yet. Silently, he tracked his steps back on the hallway and stopped in front of Megumi's bedroom. Without any noise, he pushed the shoji open and came inside. She was in bed, back turned to him, her long hair spread all over the white sheets and pillows. Carefully, he approached the bed. Then, he searched one of the inner pockets of his trench coat and retrieved a neatly folded piece of paper. Holding it between his index finger and thumb, he placed it down on her bed, right over one of the pillows, a free one almost at the edge of the bed. His fingers could not help brushing some strands of that black silk, her hair. And he turned around and walked outside, as silently as he came.

Aoshi opened the door and walked out with his things, noticing the sun was not shining that day.

xXx

She vaguely knew he had been there. His scent could be smelled inside but she did not want to have to face him now. She wanted to be strong to her last second and so, she pretended she was still sleeping. He did not call her, he did not touch her. He was wordlessly gone.

Megumi closed her eyes. Several minutes later, she turned on the bed and saw her bedroom door was open. There was a delicious smell of food filling the air. She smiled. Stretching herself, she almost jumped out of bed, as fast as her belly allowed her to, of course. Anyway, the baby was moving more and weighing more and more each day.

The house was completely lighted and she closed her eyes as she walked to the kitchen. At the kitchen door, she opened her eyes.

He was there, his back turned to her.

"Aoshi." She called his name and it had never sounded so sweet.

He looked behind and smiled. She beamed. He had smiled. Smiled at her.

Aoshi walked towards her with the wonderful smile on his lips, his eyes of a radiant sky blue, with some darker streaks.

"Come." He took her by the hand and brought her outside to the backyard. He walked behind her and delicately placed his hands over her eyes, covering them.

She giggled. " What? A surprise, anata?"

Megumi only felt his warm breath over her shoulder. "Aa"

_I feel I know you_

_I don't know how_

_I don't know why_

_I see you feel for me_

_You cried with me_

_You would die for me_

_I know I need you_

Her bare feet just touched something she instantly recognized. And soon her ankles felt it coming and going. She smiled widely. Little by little, he removed his hands from blindfolding her eyes.

"Can I?" she asked.

"Aa." He answered from behind her as his arms encircled her body.

She opened her eyes and they hurt with the immense bright light around her. She could squeal. She was in the sea. He was by her side. They had flown, they had made it. And filled with sheer happiness, she felt her child kick.

Megumi held her belly and winced. That was hard. She looked around and everything was gone. She sat down among the blankets and held her belly.

It had been only a dream. Only a dream. How stupid she was to believe that could be reality.

It was her bedroom, only her bedroom. At least the kick had been real. Megumi left her bed and walked outside. Nothing smelled like in the dream. Her house was much darker and yes, she was alone. She already knew it, that day was inevitable, he could never stay.

_How I needed you_

_How I grieve now you're gone_

_In my dreams I see you_

_I awake so alone_

She glanced through the window and the sunless morning told her it was not early anymore although she could not say precisely what time it was. She had slept a lot.

_Somehow I knew you would leave me this way_

_Somehow I knew you could never… never stay_

_And in the early morning light_

_After a silent peaceful night_

_You took my heart away_

_And I grieve_

As she walked back to her room to have her clothes changed, many things were passing before her eyes, in her head. His bedroom was open and empty, she could see it from the hallway.

_In my dreams I can see you_

_I can tell you how I feel_

_In my dreams I can hold you_

_And it feels so real_

_I still feel the pain_

_I still feel your love_

_I still feel the pain_

_I still feel your love_

_And somehow I knew you could never, never stay_

_And somehow I knew you would leave me_

_And in the early morning light_

_After a Silent peaceful night _

_You took my heart away_

_I wished, I wished you could have stayed_

The bedroom looked even sadder that time. She walked back to the bed and gathered the blankets so that she could fix it. However, once she touched her pillows, she observed as a neat beige sheet of paper slid through them to the mattress.

She did not recognize it, she did not remember that. Curious, she unfolded it. Her heart came to her mouth as her eyes recognized the beautiful handwriting.

Aoshi's. But it also contained a light green smaller paper folded inside. And after that, her heart wanted to stop when he realized what that was.

_Megumi,_

_Now, I leave it all in your hands for you to decide. This green paper is a train ticket to Kyoto. Inside the meditation room there is a chest with money. You are the one to decide. If everything remains as it is, use the money there as you may wish, I leave it to you and to our child. Maybe this is asking too much, since I feel there is no bond but the child. As you said it yourself, you have someone new to love. Be happy with the one you choose. If this one is the right path, I hope you keep contact, I will write regularly and please, do let me know if you need anything; I won't fail in my responsibilities as a father. _

_However, if you don't consider the next case some kind of lunacy, you have the option to use this train ticket. I will be waiting at the station and I will know how to handle your choice. You are the one to decide the terms of our next meeting. I will understand and respect fully. Also, I promise this is the first and last nonsense I write to you if you consider it to be one; if you do, please, forgive me._

_There are words I still have to learn how to fit my voice in. I will try my best if you come. Because I care._

_Aoshi._

Megumi was panting. As her eyes walked over the words he had written, her hands got paler and paler, and trembled as she covered her mouth. Nervously, right after she finished reading, she ran to her drawers and retrieved a few clothes and threw them into a bag. She dressed the first thing that came before her eyes, got the money at the chest Aoshi had left behind with an incredible desperate haste. In the end, she got her purse and the papers that she had left over her bed.

_Because I care._ She read the sentence once again just to make sure she was doing the right thing.

"Why is it you never said the words I longed so much to hearing?" she kissed the letter and put it next to her heart.

Shortly after that, her fingers touched the greenish paper and she smiled at it confidently. However, heaven and hell dwelled at the same time, at that very place.

Kyoto. Ten a.m.

Megumi felt she had no more air to breathe. She desperately ran to the watch and saw her fate had been sealed. Eleven twenty.

Her hands came to her face and she covered her eyes, falling to her knees in distress. "Why?"

She stood motionless, unwilling to do anything, just looking blank until it was dark. And darkness came and shrouded her.

xXx

Misao could not understand why Aoshi seemed so inpatient. Since they had arrived at the station, he was absentminded, always looking to the gates and through the small crowd that insisted in coming and growing near the trains. She could almost tell he was looking for someone.

Aoshi could not believe he had grown so emotional in such a short period of time. Well, his infinite coldness was no longer needed in those peaceful times so, little by little, he indulged himself in some comfort, in some opening.

He had already checked the time a zillion times. The luggage carrier had already placed their bags inside and Misao had already entered and come back three times, tucking to his sleeve, trying to make him go inside. Ten a.m.

The train would have its doors closed, they would depart that very second. Sadly, Aoshi walked inside and sat by Misao's side. The engine started and the train slowly departed as if it did not want to do so. He still had some hope. Lots of people outside waving their hands, smiling. But she was not there. He had waited till the very last second. He hoped she could come, in haste. She did not. He felt as a plain idiot for opening up and writing that to her, expecting that she would come. She should be laughing at his face or she should be feeling deeply insulted. He felt sorry for both of them. He looked away as all other faces were passing outside. It was over.

xXxXxXxXx

Phew!

I did not take THAT long with this chapter, uh?

Ok, lots of song references. First, I gotta thank whoever wrote Sadame, the piano version, of X-1999 TV series OST. It gave me ideas and worked as background music.

The italics embedded in Aoshi's speech, Megumi's speech, at the end of the conversation and at Megumi's dream, when put together make the lyrics of Parisienne Moonlight, a wonderful song by Anathema.

The title of this chapter and the out-of-this-world lyrics I used after Megumi woke up belong to Anathema too, the song is One Last Goodbye. And I just gotta worship Vincent for having the most emotional voice and singing the most perfect song ever.

Aoshi's letter was entirely written under Sadame piano version listening.

The names Misao thinks for the babies are a blatant reference to Asuka from Evangelion and Shigure from Fruits Basket.

The "because I loved you" Megumi says and what Aoshi writes is also strongly influenced by a sentence Subaru said to Seishirou in Tokyo Babylon and Seishirou refers to it as he is dying into Subaru's arms. Also, the "Why is it you never said the words I longed so much to hearing?" is a modified version of a sentence Subaru says right after Seishirou tells him the "mystery" words. CLAMP, I love you! And hate you too!

And readers, where are you? A BIG thank you for everyone who read this story even from the very poor, terribly boring and stupid beginning. I am sorry for that, I am ashamed about that. I plan on re-writing those sometime in the future. And thank you a lot for the support through out this many months I kept this going.

_Ennov: _thank you, thank you so much for your nice review! I really try my best to write a chapter worth of reading and I get too happy when I read what you wrote. So this chapter was faster than the last ones although it is much bigger. I hope you also enjoy it.

_Ladie Galadriel:_ no, I hadn't abandoned the fic, only that I am more busy now and I don't type everyday. And THANK you so much for taking your time to come here and review! I got so glad you liked the last chapter, that you thought it was well written. Really, I feel flattered. I never lost the motivation to upload this one, there are still a couple of things waiting to be written down here. I also hope you enjoy reading this new chapter. Well, Matsuyama-sensei… maybe you hated him this chapter… who knows : P


	40. Forgotten Hopes

Chapter XL – Forgotten Hopes

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer applies.

XxXxXx

Kaoru covered her mouth with her hand. Megumi's eyes closed the following second.

"It is… it is not possible"

The woman doctor nodded.

Kaoru expected her friend to react differently. When Megumi came to her house that morning, she was peaceful. Kaoru could have never guessed what had happened. Now she just sat across from her with that blank expression.

"Megumi…" her voice was showing how shocked she was.

Only then the doctor raised her eyes again. She let out a breath and threw some strands of her hair behind. Kaoru folded the letter and gave it back to Megumi.

"There is nothing else left to do, Kaoru."

Kaoru eyed the other woman in disbelief. Since when had Megumi been that cold blooded?

"This is not you… come on, react."

Megumi's eyebrows lifted.

"What?"

Kaoru shook her head and looked around the room. She frowned as she listened to a childish voice, squealing outside. Immediately she stood up and looked at Megumi.

"Wait a second, I have to save Kenshin from Kenji."

Megumi giggled and nodded. "Ok."

Alone in the room, Megumi just remained quiet. A shadow passed by her, whistling. Then, the steps stopped and she realized the shadow had stepped back. Soon, a spiky-haired hair showed up at the door.

"Fox lady! Long time no see."

She smiled.

"How's life, rooster head?"

He chuckled. And then he stepped inside and looked at her from head to toe. He sadly smiled then, realizing her belly. It was big now.

"Life…" he mused trying to sound poetical "you know, pretty much the same." He sat down near her. " You?"

"I am fine… getting bigger and bigger as you can see" she smiled.

And everything got silent. He just looked at her and she tried to run from his eyes. What had happened to the nice friendship they shared?

"Aoshi…"

The both of them said his name at the same time… Sano giggled and Megumi let go her fox laugh.

"Well, he is gone with Misao, you know."

Sanosuke eyed her with suspiciousness.

"For how long?"

Megumi vaguely smoothed the skirt of her light blue kimono.

" I don't know… Maybe forever."

He widened his eyes " Fo-forever?"

She nodded.

"And… and…"

"Don't worry." She smiled.

Sanosuke did not believe what he heard. He leaned forward, getting closer to her.

"Fox lady…"

She put her hands on his face.

"Sano…this is definitive. I can't hurt anybody else and I can't hurt myself again."

Her touch was warm and he closed his eyes to dive into her words.

"But you know my feelings." He said

"And you know mine." She said with her sweetest voice. "I will always love you for everything you are. So, I don't have the right to hurt you and fool you."

He placed his hand over hers, on his face.

"But you do hurt me now."

She leaned forward this time, her foreheads touching, her hands still on his face.

"But it will hurt much less in the future. I hope this hurt will pass someday. I fear the other pain I could cause you would ruin our relationship forever. You deserve better. You deserve more than what I can give you."

Sanosuke let his eyes remained closed for several seconds. Then, sensing Kaoru was almost back, he withdrew and materialized himself at the door. He waved to Megumi and smiled..

" Well, see you before I travel, I hope."

"Travel?"

"Yeah… you know, the old man needs me. I may spend some time there." He faked some sheer happiness.

"I see." She smiled sympathetically.

That very second Kaoru stepped in and gave a suspicious look to Sanosuke, shifting it to Megumi for several seconds.

"What?" Sanosuke asked.

She narrowed her eyes. Sanosuke took the opportunity as a chance to vanish and so he did.

xXxXx

He remembered well that day. It was early in the morning when the two of them arrived. Everyone at the restaurant turned to the door a they heard that familiar squeal. She had come back home again. Throwing her things aside, she ran to his arms and hugged him.

"Jiya!" her voice bore only happiness.

But, as everyone had noticed, she was not alone. Resembling a shadow, a tall man stood behind, motionless.

Caressing Misao's hair, Okina lifted his head to look at him. Aoshi was also back after months. He could not deny he was happy to see his two wards back home, safe and sound. But there was something. There was more than just the aloofness and coldness in Aoshi. Not physically, for sure, but he knew him well enough to realize the deep changes at first sight.

The rain washed Kyoto that afternoon as the summer was quickly dying and autumn was rushing closer.

Misao had been really bored. She tried and tried talking to Aoshi since they had arrived, almost two months ago and she only got vague responses. He was always busy, always working, always too distant to even look at her.

She did not understand why Okina had asked Aoshi to deal with the Aoiya either. Aoshi already had his own job at the government, he did not need more things to worry about. But he accepted and now he was something like a "business man", dealing with providers, with the restaurant income, anything like that. However, Aoshi usually dealt with all of this extremely well, as if he had always been that business man from the cradle. working hard, Aoshi still had many whiles to stay all by himself, meditating. That afternoon, he was sat on the porch, staring at the trees, watching the drops falling heavily from them and hitting small ponds on the ground. He always liked the smell of rain, he always liked the peace it made him feel.

Okina walked almost soundlessly to the spot Aoshi was, but he knew he could not fool the Okashira.

Of course, Aoshi had felt his presence but he did not open his eyes, he did not turn back to face the old man.

Okina stopped when he was by Aoshi's side. Then, he sat down and both men kept the deadly silence for several moments. Then, as the rain went stronger, Okina broke the silence.

"Aoshi… there is something we must talk."

Aoshi did not move nor speak. However, Okina knew he had accepted him there, he was going to listen.

"I was told of why you were living in Tokyo, why you took so long to come back to the Aoi-ya." He paused.

Aoshi was a perfect frozen statue.

"Haven't you gotten word from her since then?"

"No." Aoshi mumbled without moving his lips or making any noticeable move.

Okina analyzed his features for long whiles.

"Don't you feel alone, Aoshi?"

The younger man opened his eyes and frowned.

"Alone? I still have things to do, I still have my clan."

Okina sighed and the, stood up. He walked in circles, his both arms behind his back, trying to figure out Aoshi's response.

"You know, Aoshi… I think I did an awful job while raising you."

"What do you mean with that, old man?" his whisper was deep however.

"I knew you were a different boy. And I think I pushed on that too hard. I gave you too much responsibilities when you were nothing but a child."

"People are considered men at 15." Aoshi retorted.

"But you were taken as a grown-up one since you were 8. That was a big mistake." Okina sighed and looked at his own feet.

_Do you ever wonder why you were left alone_

_As your heart grew colder and finally turned to stone_

"Tell me, Aoshi. In all these years, haven't you envied the other ones who could have a different life, different feelings from yours? Haven't you dreamed of being someone else?"

Aoshi frowned.

"I think you are getting senile, old man. I am Oniwabanshuu…"

" I am also one, I have also been one, boy, but I did not let it ruin my feelings."

Aoshi arched a fine brow to the old man:

"If it is like this, why haven't you gotten married?"

Okina smiled sadly.

"I really wanted but those times things were harder…" his look was vague and nostalgic for a moment. " but… I am still open to it although my age makes me handicapped."

_Did I punish you for dreaming?_

…

_Do you ever dream of escaping?_

_Don't you ever dream of escaping..._

"Think better. Time has passed, things are not as difficult as they used to be. You are still young and handsome. You haven't always been like this, Aoshi. Life made you mature more than anyone else before the right time. But now, I think life gives you a new opportunity, a new chance to be happy, a new chance to stop mourning, a chance I myself never had in these better era."

_Pathetic oblivion_

_Forgotten hopes buried in your soul's lonely grave_

_Pathetic oblivion_

_Remember how you were before you locked your heart away_

"I hope you still have some hopes in yourself. I can see how you changed, I can see it all. But you have to see it and accept it yourself. Feeling, opening your heart won't make you weaker, it will make you stronger. Being lonely is terrible. Don't waste your time now. When you realize, time will have passed and you will be left alone. More alone than you even feel now."

"But… maybe… by now… maybe I have already ruined these hopes, old man."

Once again, Okina approached the younger man and smiled to him, before stroking his hair. Aoshi's eyes widened in great surprise but he felt nice when Okina did it.

"I know I should not be doing this to the Okashira, but before becoming one, you were my boy."

Aoshi looked up to the old man and saw he was smiling widely.

" Come on, don't look at me like that…" the older man said. Then, he retrieved an envelope from inside his pocket and handed to Aoshi. " Take it. Maybe there is still something you can do about it."

Aoshi blinked in confusion but reached out his hand to take the envelope. When he saw the handwriting, he recognized it immediately.

Okina blinked to him as he realized Aoshi's surprise.

"Let's hope there are good news and that she is writing to tell you lovely words and not to say you are a jerk."

"Old man…"

Okina chuckled. " I know, I know you tried… let's see…" and he kept on eying Aoshi with great curiosity.

However, Aoshi gave him a "get lost" look.

Okina moaned. " Ok… I guessed you would like to read it alone…"

When Okina was far gone, and he could tell that, when he sensed nobody was around, he carefully opened the envelope and got the only sheet of paper that was placed within it. Her handwriting was fine as always.

_Aoshi-san,_

_It's been a while since I heard from you, so I decided to write since you once asked for news. I don't know if you still want them, though._

_I hope all the people there at Aoi-ya are well._

_I am fine, I came back to work and it's doing me good._

_Everyone here in Tokyo is at full health; the dojo is doing really great._

_And… my eighth month is coming closer and closer as the autumn is also coming. My belly is really big now and the child moves a lot._

_I believe you are going to answer._

_Takani Megumi_

Aoshi folded the paper and put it back into the envelope. He could never expect she would write once she had actually refused to go on with him. But reading those words from her made him happy and thoughtful. Okina's words were not empty, he surely knew a lot to talk like that.

"Don't you ever dream of escaping, Aoshi?" he asked himself.

xXxXxXxXx

Aoshi was in the office reading through Aoi-ya documents and he realized she was coming from behind.

She entered, walking as soft as the breeze that affected Kyoto those days. And, not minding at all, she placed her arms around his neck, letting her hands fall toward his chest.

"Good morning, Aoshi-sama" she said in a whisper too close to his ear. Her hair cascaded down from her, reaching his neck, some strands falling and sneaking into his shirt.

"Good morning, Misao." He knew it was her much before she entered the room. But, if he did not know her presence he could have been fooled by the different scent of her newest perfume, by the delicacy in the way she stepped into his office… by everything.

It was like that almost every morning. She used to come and just sit near him and stay silent, just looking at him with those jade eyes as if begging for his attention, for his words. She would stay there until Okina came into and tell her to go downstairs and help the others at the restaurant.

Then, Aoshi would breathe and forget the pain he felt everytime he raised his eyes and met her jade ones gleaming to him.

xXxXxXx

OH MY GOD! I finally hit 100 reviews! ultra happy mode on! Thanks for everyone who read/is reading this fic even with its awful beginning. I promise I will fix it someday when university lets me live a normal life again.

And as you might realize, that was not the end. :D

Forgotten Hopes is the title of an WONDERFUL song by Anathema, from their Album Judgement(1999). Also, I had to borrow some parts of the lyrics and put here.

During a Civil Law class, i had an idea for another fic, Betrayal- another Meg-Aoshi ficas some of you may have realized.Now, I have 3 fics to end... let's see how long it is gonna take.

**Ennov: **it touches me deep you felt so much while reading. Thanks, it makes me happy when I read someone got this involved in my writing.

**Macmac:** here's your update.

**Rowan: **this chapter does not answer your questions yet. All of them will be answered soon, really soon.

**Araly**: sorry I took so long, but I hope you like this chapter.

**Glassylass:** thanks so much for your kind review. I planned this one to be emotional too, mainly the "Aoshi-Okina" part. Let's see if it works.

**Zeki Zephyre**I know last chapter was heavier than this one. Well, I thought I could compensate a bit with this light one now. Thanks for reading and reviewing.

**lady galadriel: **How can't we just love Aoshi? I also loved the letter ;) you don't like Matsuyama? I know :D he was really meant to be someone between Meg and Aoshi sometime in this fic, but truly, he is not a bad guy.


	41. Strong

Chapter XLI – Strong

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer applies.

XxXxXx

Not even one single word. Nothing. She had waited for anything in those two weeks that followed.

Now she had hit her eighth month, she was only working at home with Saeko's help. Sometimes she would go to the hospital only to do some research and read up on new subjects.

Megumi watched the fire burning and waited for the food to be ready. From the kitchen, she could hear Saeko walking around the house, closing the windows. The girl had been spending long whiles with her now she was alone and her big belly weighed too much to allow her to take care of the house ad clinic all by herself.

The days were getting shorter and colder. She still watched the fire.

Saeko walked into the kitchen and smiled.

"Megumi-sensei, I have closed all the windows already. The clinic is also locked and clean."

Megumi pushed away all her thoughts that time and disguised all her worriment.

"Good, Saeko-chan. Come and sit down. The tea and the soup will be ready in no time."

The girl did as the older woman said. She observed Megumi has already lit all the lanterns in the house. They both stood silent. Saeko did not want to disturb Megumi. The doctor, when alone, was lost into her thoughts. Not that she had been sad, but Saeko knew there was something missing.

_I see every smile you fake  
Strong emotion, strong devotion to ignore the pain  
to stand strong_

After the dinner, Saeko left. Megumi stood by the door, watching the girl as she walked up the street. That time there were many people were returning home after a whole day of work. She had told Saeko to rush or the rain could catch her.

When the younger woman was no longer in sight, she closed the door. In less than one hour, the rain began to fall. She heard the water hitting the dry leaves outside.

Another day had passed, another night would come. That was the end of another week.

XxXxXxXx

The Aoi-ya was full of guests that night. Misao was downstairs helping the others with a giant smile on her face.

The inside was pretty warm and the nice smell of food was really inviting. There was the sound of many voices giggling, talking. Sounds of happiness. Aoshi observed everything from the back of the room. That was, undoubtedly, an excellent night, not only for the restaurant but for the inn. Besides, Okina had left to one of his business dinners. They were becoming more and more usual recently.

Aoshi spotted Okina the same instant he entered. Misao passed near him carrying trays. He stopped, smiled and patted her on the head. His look fell immediately on Aoshi who had been watching him since his arrival. However, as the place was full, it took him some time till he could get to where the younger man was. He came smiling walking calmly.

"People asked about you there, Aoshi."

For some seconds, it seemed Aoshi's mind had been elsewhere. Okina kept on waiting for an answer and got surprised when Aoshi stood up and followed towards the stairs.

" I bet you gave them a convincing excuse."

Okina grinned. " You know you did not need to stay. The others could have handled everything here very well."

The two men followed upstairs an turned left, entering a neat office. Aoshi sat behind a table and Okina still paced around.

Aoshi could tell there was something in Okina's behavior that led him to hink the old man was disguising something. Well, if the old man was good at disguising, he was good at discovering.

He got a pile of papers and started to examine it. Okina's attention shifted to Aoshi as he heard the paper being handled.

"No comments on today's meeting?" Aoshi continued without taking his eyes from the paper.

Okina smiled peacefully. " Uhm... nooooooooooooo" and he kept on walking in circles with his hands behind his back until he reached the window. " Chilly night, uh?"

"Aa."

The old man was almost laughing. " There was nothing special. The same old thing... just that this time we decided that you should be the best person to deal with some _affairs_."

Aoshi lifted his eyebrows. Whatever would that be, he knew it would mean _trouble_. Okina was all but muffling a laugh. He did not like the expression on the older man's face or the way he used the word _affair_ to designate what he had to deal with.

"Old man..."

"No, don't worry, boy. It has nothing to do with persuading any women. I would not allow such thing or we would end up ruined. In my humble opinion, I am still the best when it comes to girls."

Aoshi could have almost rolled his eyes as Okina kept on boasting about his incredible techniques on how to convince a woman and all.

"What wonders me is that you are not married or is anywhere close to that."

The older man pouted.

"I could give you a much elaborated answer on that, but you are still remembered as Okashira so, let's just skip it."

Aoshi lifted a fine brow to him to show him he had won that one somehow.

"No frail rich women are involved, so we don't have to talk to them and establish partnership." He almost chuckled. " However, we do need you to meet someone who is interested in supporting some business here in Kyoto. We chose you as our representative."

"Based on what?"

Okina turned around, dashed to the table and placed his both hands on the top of it, facing Aoshi right in the eyes.

"You are the one here that nows both Kyoto and Tokyo best. Also, you are familiar to many things about laws and such. Besides, you are the one who can run a formal and legal investigation."

"With investigation you mean... spying."

"Sure, boy." Okina's smile had become giant.

Aoshi stood motionless for several seconds. He narrowed his eyes and had his hands together. Okina also froze up, the giant smile on his face.

"Aren't you realizing the best part?"

Aoshi lifted his brow once again.

Okina let go a breath and turned his back to Aoshi in a theatrical way.

"You will have to go to Tokyo."

Okina turned around again, expecting any reaction from the other man. As the seconds passed and he was motionless, he decided to do it again.

"Yoooooooou wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiill haaaaaaaaaaaaave toooooooo gooooooooooo..."

"You don't need to drag the words out, I had already understood that.." He said in a monotone voice.

"Less bad then! That will make you get out of this place. Come on, Aoshi, you look mildewed!"

"When do we have to leave?" he asked finally.

"The day after tomorrow."

"That is impossible! This is really sudden and we cannot leave Aoi-ya..."

"Sorry to interrupt you, but I never said we."

Aoshi let go a breath and stared at Okina

"There is no way for me to travel to Tokyo so soon."

Okina grinned. The following second, he put a finger on his chin " Uhm... but I could take my time to do some shopping ... ok, it is decided, I am also going!"

"Old man... I said that..."

"Come on, Aoshi! It will not hurt."

Later that night, Okina gathered everyone to announce they would leave in two days. It was decided it would be a short trip, two or three days and that everyone would take care of the business like the old times. This time, Misao was allowed to take part in the "fun".

Aoshi decided not go say any word about that issue anymore. He sat on the office, near the window, his eyes focused on a distant point far beyond. He knew that night he could not sleep. He did not want to go to Tokyo. Tokyo meant _her_. Not that he was running away but he was not ready for that after what had happened when he went away.

He looked at his desk. He knew that under all those books and papers, there was her letter. A letter he had started writing but never finished. He never knew why he could not finish it; maybe it was because he thought he had revealed enough in another letter he had written himself and that he had expected to have caused a certain reaction. He only knew he was not ready for that, not that sudden. Furthermore, he did not want to let his clan down. He had to be a role model for them, he had to be strong, he had to go on and make them see him strong. And deep inside at that time, he was being everything but strong.

During the whole following day, Misao and Okina observed how absent minded Aoshi was. It was even disturbing to look at him and see him staring into nothing with a semblance that looked almost painful.

_I see your pain I see it grow  
Slowly inside you  
You cannot control it  
The hurting's ruthless, you cannot win_

I see every smile you fake  
Strong emotion  
Strong devotion to ignore the pain  
To stand strong

Day after day, to be there for us, always  
To pretend there's nothing wrong

He had been like that for months already. He had wanted everyone to believe he was ok but, he was not that good at hiding his feelings. Misao wondered if he was not good at hiding his feelings anymore or if it was because this time everything was too serious. She shifted her look between Okina and Aoshi. Both of them were too serious. Okina, however, should be thinking the same of her for he led her outside by the arm.

"We have to do something."

Her eyes almost filled with tear.

"I can't stand seeing him staring blankly like that anymore, Jiya... I just don't know what to do."

"It is all for us, my dear. Everything for us. That boy is so stubborn. Once again I get to think it was too terrible to have placed such a great responsibility on him when he was barely a child. _Mea culpa."_

The girl hesitated for some seconds but then she pulled an envelope from inside her clothes.

"Please, Jiya." She let her hand stretched out for him.

The old man looked at the envelope and read the name of the receiver. "Misao..." he shook his head.

"Please, she insisted. I swear to God, I swear on Aoshi-sama that it is not bad."

Okina analyzed the girl. Her begging was true, he could not refuse her plea.

"Ok. I will." And he got the envelope from her hand, earning a smile in return.

Misao waited until Okina had left towards the stairs. Aoshi hadn't slept at all, she knew that. His futon was perfectly folded and nobody had seen him in the kitchen; he also wore the same clothes he did last night. When he was not staring into infinity, he was swamping himself with work.

"Aoshi-sama?" she hesitated at the door.

He turned around to look at her and tell her to come in. He almost knew what she would tell him. She would probably say he should eat more, that he should go out, he should enjoy the weak sun that appeared that morning or something. But that morning, when he looked at her, he saw her eyes were different.

She looked at him and saw his eyes were dark. So dark and so sad. She went in for he allowed it. She first thought to greet him with a smile, but she dropped the idea. She just walked next to him, to the armchair near the window. There were books and papers on the low table beside it.

"Aoshi-sama. You are leaving tonight. I already fetched clean clothes and I will cook something very delicious myself so you and Jiya can eat on your trip to Tokyo."

He never raised his eyes to look at her. He only mumbled "Thanks."

She bit her lip. Anyway, she moved closer and sat down on the carpet, her eyes totally focused on him.

"Are you worried, Aoshi-sama? Is it anything about business?"

"No, Misao." Only then he reached out his hand to get one of the books on the low table, but his hand never touched the book. Her small hand came on his way and held his one. That made him look at her. He did not know if he really felt warm or if that warmth he felt the moment she touched his hand and entwined her fingers with his was only sadness to see her smile. She smiled so beautifully and he felt so guilty for always ruining that beautiful smile.

"_Every painful day I'll be there for you, always. And together we will stand strong."_

It killed him. It surely killed him every time he had to pretend he did not know about her so pure feelings. He was so battered he could never ever accept those feelings under any circumstances. Besides, there was so much else.

She was like that, frozen, standing-by, holding his hand with her purest and warmest smile. He could do nothing.

"I think your should smile more, Misao." He mumbled as his hand came to her forehead and stroke her hair.

She could almost cry. Instead, she decided to smile. "I only smile because you are here. I have always longed for a smile of you, Aoshi-sama, but it never came." She lowered her eyes for some seconds.

He felt his heart weigh.

"But now I don't care if your smile is not for me. All I want is that you smile and I will keep on smiling to you if I know you are there for me. I never want to go far from you, Aoshi-sama, and it is not physically saying. I never want you to be unhappy. So, if you allow me so, I can tell you that you do not have to worry about me or anyone here in the clan. We will be happy if you are, whatever is your happiness. Please, Aoshi-sama, make us all happy."

While she was speaking, he felt an urge to hold her hand so tight and he did so, taking care not to hurt her. The tighter he held, sweeter was her smile. And he could breathe in again, he did not know what was that. Lately, he was not aware, he did not know much anyway.

"We will stand strong." He whispered as he pulled her near and kissed her forehead. "Thank you, Misao-chan."

She closed her eyes when his lips touched her forehead and her body trembled when he called her Misao-chan again after so many years.

After so many years.

XxXxXxXx

For the first time, he knew he would not have to run away. She was there at the station. Her smile was radiant and he did not have to look elsewhere not to see her sad look or tears. Everyone waving. The grey sky and the cold wind were there as witnesses. Okina stood beside him and at the time, they entered the train.

XxXxXxXx

Now with her eighth month passing fast and weighing on her, Megumi hadn't been working regularly, she sometimes showed up to see how things were going and to study. That day, however, she had spent her whole afternoon at the hospital reading and visiting patients she used to tend to.

In the middle of the afternoon, when tiredness had already gotten to her, she decided to leave the library and drink something to also warm her a bit.

Megumi walked the hallway towards the restaurant near the garden in the inside of the hospital. Many people were there that time, probably with her very purpose for the day was chilly. Matsuyama Nobori spotted her at the second she stepped in an waved to her, inviting her to take a sit at the same table he had been in. Megumi smiled and walked on his direction.

"Chilly, uh?" the man smiled.

"Yes." She answered while tucking strands of hair behind her ear.

After ordering her tea, she realized the doctor was actually staring at her with a distant, almost longing look. A small smiled lingered on his lips.

She felt the urge to make a remark, but she didn't. When he noticed she was well aware of the time he had spent looking at her, he shifted on his chair and lowered his eyes.

"You just look so much like her..." he stated vaguely.

The waitress came to the table and set the tea over it. Megumi was puzzled. She bent her body to reach to the cup and asked in a low voice.

"Her? Who?"

" My wife." The man winced.

Before taking a sip of her tea, Megumi lowered her eyes.

"I never knew you were married, sensei." And she smiled.

She expected the doctor to smile too, but there was not even a hint of a smile on his lips.

"She is dead."

Megumi froze with the statement.

"I am sorry, sensei, I couldn't have known."

Only then the man looked at her with a rather warmer smile.

"No problem..." he sighed. " Maybe that is the reason I like you so much, Takani-sensei."

She knew that if she had taken that other sip, she would have choked on it. Her eyes focused on anything on the place but him.

" I did not mean to let you shy,sensei. " the man insisted. " It is that every time I look at you, I see my deceased wife and I can't help it..."

"No problem..." she vaguely stated.

"So... if there is anything I can do..." his voice was rather dense.

"Just keep on being this good friend you are." She cut him and smiled at him.

He lowered his eyes for a couple of seconds and that saddened his face. However, in the end, he smiled at her and they both headed back to the library.

xXxXx

It was getting dark although it was not so late already. From inside the carriage, she saw there was someone at her door. Because of the time and her condition, Matsuyama-sensei decided to accompany her on the carriage..

The other doctor had also spotted a man standing by his work mate's door. When the carriage stopped, he jumped off first and he would go ask the man who he was but Megumi held his arm. The newcomer looked at her and bowed.

"Thank you, Matsuyama-sensei.". she said with a firm voice.

Then, she turned to the man and started to bow but he came closer.

"You don't need to, Megumi-sensei. I bet it is not so comfortable for you now. Besides, we do not need such formality since we've known each other for so long."

"Okina-san, he is Matsuyama Nobori-sensei and he works with me at the hospital."

Okina bowed to the other man. Now his features were much softer.

"Matsuyama-sensei, he is Kashiwazaki-san, an old friend." She smiled to him.

The male doctor bowed deeply and showed himself embarrassed. Okina did not mind a bit.

Megumi made her way to open the door and invite them to enter.

"I am sorry, Takani-sensei, but I have to go. Thanks." Matsuyama responded. "It was a pleasure to meet you, Kashiwazaki-san." He bowed once more.

"Likewise."

"Thanks for bringing me home, sensei." Megumi smiled from her door.

The male doctor gave her a shy smile and hoped in the carriage again.

Soon, Megumi and Okina were already into her house.

She smiled at the old man and couldn't keep her surprise look from being widely noticed.

"Business in Tokyo." He said to her when she told him to sit down.

Okina was also really surprised. He hadn't managed in picturing Megumi with such a big belly.

"My grandchild is doing fine, I suppose." he was all smiles.

Megumi smiled even more, trying to dismiss a hint of shyness.

"Of course! I am a good mom!"

Having the old man's company was always nice. Right the opposite of Aoshi, Okina was cheerful and talkative and also a very good person to keep up with her on jokes and teases.

They talked of everything. Okina informed her about all kinds of things that had happened in Kyoto since she last visited. She also had all time to tell how her life was going. Aoshi's name was not spoken not even once.

When he decided that was already too late, Okina, despite Megumi's invitation to stay for the night, decided to return to the hotel. At the door, he stretched out his hand to her and handed her an envelope.

"This is from Misao. I decided to give her the benefit of doubt, I wish you could do the same."

Surprised, Megumi got the envelope and nodded to the old man.

"Good night, girl." He bowed to Megumi.

"Thank you for the visit." She smiled and bowed to him.

Alone in her house, Megumi kept the letter into her kimono until the time she went to bed.

Already laying down and under the blankets, she got the envelope and opened it. A long letter from Misao.

"_Oneesan..."_

She started the letter like that. Megumi's eyes widened many times as she read through Misao's words. In the end, she almost had tears in her eyes. Carefully, she folded the letter and put it back into the envelope and switched beneath her blankets. She could not tell if it would be easier to sleep that night or if she would manage to sleep at all.

xXxXx

Okina entered the inn with the biggest smile on his lips, even whistling an old song. He found Aoshi at the door of his room, arms crossed over his chest.

"You took long, old man."

Okina passed by him and opened the door.

"I was visiting someone."

"This late in the night?" he inquired.

Okina watched Aoshi follow him inside the room.

"Megumi-san is a formidable person to talk to." He answered.

Aoshi tried to disguise all he could but he did not expect the old man to be visiting her.

Okina roamed inside the room, pretending to be fetching things for his bath.

"No wonder she did not ask about you or mentioned your name. You do not really talk to anyone, do you?"

Aoshi only observed the other man for long whiles. Okina walked from one side to the other, looked inside bags, folded papers...

"And how is she?" Aoshi finally asked.

Okina looked at him from above his shoulder.

"You should go there and see by yourself." He smirked.

xXxXxXx

The day was also cold.

Megumi had a water can to water the plants outside. It was one of the few things her belly allowed her to do anyway.

When she opened the back door, she let the water can fall. The metal made a muffled sound when it hit the wood of the engawa.

_Aoshi._

It sounded pretty obvious since Okina was in Tokyo and after she had read Misao´s letter. However, she did not expect him to show up so early in the morning.

He looked somewhat more pale than usual. He looked down at her and kept his eyes stuck on her brown ones.

She thought he was moving to retrieve the water can from the floor, but in one second, his hand touched her face.

_Strong emotion  
Strong devotion to ignore the pain  
To stand strong_

"Aoshi-san..." she opened her mouth to ask him why he had touched her that way.

"Megumi, I hope you can understand... I am not that strong." he almost whispered.

She felt her heart freeze with his words.

"What do y-" she tried to ask but her fingers curled as she was taken completely aback when he moved and bowed, his blue eyes closing slowly.

He had cut her off and silenced her with a kiss. A kiss. His eyes were closed whereas hers were completely opened. His kiss cut her breath, cut her words, cut any reaction she could possibly have. A kiss.

He almost could not recall that taste anymore. Little by little, even unwillingly, she closed her eyes.

He had hoped she could understand, but of all things in the world, she could not understand that one at all and it had only been a kiss.

xXxXxXx

Song reference: Strong by the dutch band After Forever, recorded on their most recent album, Remagine.

A giant thank you to everyone who's been following this story throughout the years.


	42. Pledge

Chapter XLII– Pledge

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer applies.

XxXxXx

He had cut her off and silenced her with a kiss. A kiss. His eyes were closed whereas hers were completely opened. His kiss cut her breath, cut her words, cut any reaction she could possibly have. A kiss.

He almost could not recall that taste anymore. Little by little, even unwillingly, she closed her eyes and gave in to the warm spiral coming up her spine and soothing all her defenses.

He had hoped she could understand, but of all things in the world, she could not understand that one at all and it had only been a kiss.

Now, with her eyes closed and finally corresponding him in that kiss, she felt her whole body grow warm and she felt ice into her stomach. And there was only him. She was numb to everything but his fingers on her face, slowly sliding down to her jaw, crawling towards behind her ear, brushing the roots of the hair on her nape. She could only smell that wood-like fragrance of his, the peculiar smell of his body. She was deaf for all sounds but his breathing under that kiss and, instinctively, as if recovering a long lost memory, she could only feel his taste and almost cry to be able to feel it once again. However, that seemed only bewitchment, delusion and it should not be right.

Megumi opened her eyes and before her, there was only him, with eyes closed, semblance perfectly calm but kind of desperate at the same time. Gathering strength, for her body seemed to be willing to fight against her mind, she lifted her both hands and placed them over his chest, making a slight pressure. At that very second, Aoshi opened his eyes and, eventually, stopped kissing her. He also withdrew his hands from over her and merely watched her pull away and turn her back to him.

"Please, Aoshi-san..."-her voice was weak- " this is..."

He closed his eyes and became serious. " I see. I beg your forgiveness for such a foolish thing. It was extremely inappropriate since whenever I do not think over my actions, I seem out to always mistake them."

Megumi bit her lip but never turned to him. " You don't need to." She was indeed pretty confused for she could never imagine Shinomori Aoshi would do anything without thinking over the matter for at least a hundred times.

"I just intended to see if you were doing well." He excused.

It was difficult to turn around and look at him for she was overwhelmed by shyness.

"I appreciate your concern."

He looked around a couple of times and decided to walk back the way he had taken to enter the house.

"I am in town with Okina for a while. I just would like to know if you would mind me coming here to spend some time with you since delivery is really soon."

"No, I would not mind at all." She answered in a whisper.

"Thank you." He placed his hand on the door. " I shall come tomorrow then. Do not worry because I will not behave as I did today. Have a good day, Megumi-san."

"You too, Aoshi-san." Although her mouth had moved and her voice sounded, even though restrained, she was paralyzed. He had just gone and she had not even been able to look at him. She could not understand. Of all people, she could not understand that man.

Outside, Aoshi clenched his fist so strongly his nails bruised his skin slightly. If he could, he would have punched something. He was such an idiot. She was fine, blushed, looking healthy, she did not need him anymore. And to see and accept that, hurt him like hell- and he had to admit it.

He made his way back to the inn not glancing around not even once, totally confident on his senses.

When he entered the building, Okina was at the common room, chatting to a tall man dressed in a suit. When he saw Aoshi stepping in, he excused himself bowed to the man and tried to follow Aoshi who walked in in too long strides.

Okina had to try hard to keep up with Aoshi's speed in such a narrow corridor. He saw as the younger man entered his room and, seconds later, he did the same.

The trench coat lied on a chair and, suddenly, the old man listened another shoji being shut close. He crossed the room and opened it. It was the back door and now, he watched Aoshi going down some steps, most probably going to the hot springs. Okina stepped outside, closing the shoji behind him. Aoshi was going down fast and he had to run down the stairs, taking care not to trip and fall. He called out Aoshi's name but the younger man never turned around and pretended not to have listened to it although Okina knew pretty well Aoshi was totally aware of his presence.

When he finally made to the springs, he found Aoshi already into it. He came closer and crouched near him, at the outer side.

"Where have you been so early, son?"

Aoshi looked at him with the corner of his eyes.

"Do not ask for I do not think it concerns to you, old man."

Okina sighed and rolled his eyes. " So sour already in the morning?"

"One more question and I will let you go alone to the business meetings this evening." Aoshi dryly retorted without going up levels in his tone of voice

Noticing that would not take them anywhere, Okina gave up. He went back on his feet and excused himself to leave. It was not necessary to ask, however, by that complete display, Aoshi must have gone to see Megumi and the result had been a disaster.

Aoshi felt safer now that Okina was gone. He did not want to admit his defeat so openly to the old man. He knew he had treated him bad, but that was the best to do.

He needed that time to cool him down, although, literally, the hot springs would not do much. However, now he was feeling all his muscles soothing slowly and he tilted his head behind to brace it against the border of the spring.

_I can't hold this state  
Anymore  
Understand me  
Anymore  
To tread this fantasy, openly  
What have I done  
Oh, this uncertainty  
Is taking me over  
I can't mould this stage  
Anymore  
Recognize me  
Anymore  
To tread this fantasy, openly  
What have I done  
Oh, this uncertainty  
Is taking me over_

xXxXxXx

As promised, while in town, he had visited her always at the end of the daylight. Three days already.

That situation was, foremost, strange. Aoshi would come in. Most of times, Megumi was already alone since Saeko, who had been helping her every day now, had gone. Megumi would open the door, he would sit down at the living room and they would have tea together. Only that. From that day he had suddenly kissed her, she could not look at him anymore and it was very difficult to engage into conversation.

Aoshi, as usual, would not talk much either. He limited himself to ask her how she had passed the day. Sometimes Megumi asked him how Okina was and he answered briefly that the old man was nice, had sent her his best regards and apologies for not visiting often since he was extremely busy.

That day Aoshi had arrived earlier. Saeko was closing the windows when she heard there was someone at the door. Megumi had just finished bathing and changing.

Saeko walked happily to the door and when she opened it, her happiness seemed to have been multiplied.

"Shinomori-sensei!" she almost beamed " Long time no see! Please, come in, I will call Megumi-sensei!"

Aoshi bowed and walked in. Saeko walked inside but she came back few seconds after with a smile on her face.

"How are you doing, Saeko-san?"

"Very fine, Shinomori-sensei. By the way, Megumi-sensei is coming shortly. Would you care for anything, sensei? Tea? Water?"

Aoshi shook his head. " No. I am fine, thank you."

Saeko looked to Aoshi and then to the hallway, back and forth. " Much work, Shinomori-sensei?"

Aoshi frowned slightly. " Aa."

"I come here every day now to be with Megumi-sensei ever since my family and I moved near. Now the boys are attending the dojo under Yahiko-sensei's teaching."

Aoshi did not remember Saeko to be so talkative. " Much work here in the clinic? And is your mother doing fine?" he had to give in into conversation for he did not mean to be impolite.

"Ah, mother is really fine, back to work and everything. But here in the clinic we do not have much to do since it has been very hard for Megumi-sensei to walk around with that big belly and..."

"Good evening, Aoshi-san." Megumi greeted from behind.

Saeko stopped talking as if scared cause she hadn't realized Megumi's arrival. Also, she had not looked at Aoshi to see that he now had his eyes on the other woman since she made her way to the living room.

"Good evening, Megumi-san." Aoshi stood up and bowed.

"Well, it is getting dark. I see you tomorrow, Megumi-sensei. And, if anything happens, if you feel it is time, or any pain, don't hesitate to call me." Saeko said cheerfully while walking towards the door.

"Thanks, Saeko-chan. I will not hesitate, believe me." Megumi smiled.

"Goodbye, Saeko-san." Aoshi looked behind.

"Goodbye..." she blushed and then, closed the door.

Now the two of them were once again alone again.

"Please, sit down, Aoshi-san." Megumi offered at the same time she was also sitting down.

"Have you been in pain, Megumi?" Aoshi inquired.

"Oh, that..." she threw her hair behind. " No... just some discomfort early this afternoon, much because of the weight on my poor back, you do not need to worry."

Aoshi could see Megumi looked really fine. She was not pale, right the opposite, blushed cheeks, nice skin and hair.

He retrieved a small package from into his coat and handed to Megumi. She looked at it, the small parcel wrapped in white paper.

"What is it?" she frowned.

"Please, accept it." He said and kept his hand stretched towards her. " I bought it this morning."

Megumi touched the parcel and then, placed it on her lap. " Thanks." She mumbled. " May I open it?"

"Aa."

Her fingers undid the folding of the paper and soon, the gift was uncovered. She lifted it before her eyes. A baby blanket and a robe.

"I guessed light yellow would be fine for the robe." Aoshi said.

Megumi was not sure but she thought he had sounded a bit shy that time. His voice was softer and it did not bear the usual commanding and self-assured tone.

"It is." She stated in a smile.

He wanted to be part of that world too, she thought. Aoshi was trying hard to participate in her pregnancy, or at least, its last days. Since it was excruciating to walk nowadays, Megumi almost had not bought things for her baby and it now worried her since time was so close.

She had that in her mind the whole time. She could not guess Aoshi's intentions, she only knew he had made sure he was present and that that child was not only hers. She did not know if she should fear it or if she should feel glad for it.

"Megumi? Is everything well?"

She blinked several times, completely ashamed for Aoshi was now looking completely confused.

"You suddenly stopped..." he completed.

"I just got lost into my own thoughts, sorry." She placed the things into the package again.

There was no more conversation from that point on. Aoshi knew Megumi pretty well to tell she was disturbed by something he could not tell.

At the usual time, he stood up and walked to the door. As always, automatically, Megumi followed him.

"I shall come tomorrow with Okina. That old man is dying to come along."

She smiled faintly. On normal conditions, she would have laughed and made a remark on his sentence.

Aoshi bowed and was about to step outside when she restrained his move. Looking down, he saw Megumi had held his upper arm, her both arms encircling and enfolding it and her own face braced on it.

"Aoshi-san..."

He widened his eyes and he felt his heart sink into his stomach.

"Aoshi-san..." she started again, this time, however, facing him. "I wanted to ask you something..." she bit her lip. " I know that at first, it may sound selfish, but, please, see my reasons for asking you such a thing."

Then, she let go of his arm and he turned around to face her.

"Ask." He said.

The woman looked away and, by the way her fingers moved beneath her sleeves, he could tell how nervous she was.

"Please, don't take this child away from me. I know you have your rights as a father, but... you have Kyoto, the Aoiya, you have a family of your own and this baby is the only family I have. I have always been alone in this life and now, when I finally get the chance to have a family all mine, I beg you not to take this from me."

He confronted her eyes, begging, in plea, and he did not know what to do. Instinctively, he walked closer and placed his hand over her head. That time, he felt her shiver and it seemed she would take a step back. When he stroke her hair and entangled his fingers on the black strands of her hair, she knew she had already gotten an answer.

" I will not. I never thought of doing such thing to you." His tone was even sad that time. In his mind, he was confused. He did not know many things and, it was surely shocking to imagine she thought that of him. She really did not know him, everything was too awkward and now, with that mix of feelings he had inside, he only regretted he had let time put them this apart.

"Thank you." She whispered as she made her way forward, entering his space and resting her head on his chest.

_Closer, no hesitation  
Give me all that you have  
And it's been so long, that I can't explain  
And it's been so long, right now, so wrong  
My thoughts are creeping  
Too late, the show has begun  
Cause it's been so long, that I can't confess  
And it's been so long, right now, so wrong  
Is it all as it seems  
So unresolved, so unredeemed  
If I remain, how will I know  
Cause it's been so long  
That I can't be sure  
And it's been so wrong  
Right now, so wrong_

When he felt her warm face against his chest, he sighed, looked up and closed his eyes. How had everything gone that far? He wished he had the power to tie the loose ends, but, at that rate, he did not even have power to explain himself what was happening. There were many words he wished he could tell her, but now, he did not have the strength to gather them and make them reach her ears. He did not even know if she would listen to them, to what he thought that could be his ultimate confessions.

He just knew that it hurt and comforted him somehow, after such a long time, to see her coming to him almost defenseless again.

xXxXxXx

One more chapter. This had been written for a while already, only it needed some revision. The fic is coming to its end, and so is university, because of that it's getting hard to get some time to focus on writing. I have everything set up in my mind and I gave up including many elements and twists into the story or I would have at least 20 more chapters to write. So, I think we only have more 3 or 4 to go.

Songs used in this chapter: **Over** and **Humming**, both from Portishead.

A huge sweet "thank you" to everyone who still reads, reviews and supports this fic.


	43. Life

Chapter XLIII – Life

Chapter XLIII – Life

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer applies.

XxXxXx

The following day was just like the previous ones. The only difference was that that time Okina also came along.

Cheerful as always, the old man was supposed to arrive a bit later, as Aoshi had informed, for he intended to cook dinner so they all could have a meal together.

Aoshi was sat at the kitchen when he said those words regarding the older man. Standing, near the cupboard, Megumi pouted, turned to face Aoshi and put her hands on her hips as if truly offended.

"Hmm...I may not be an expert like everyone there at Aoi-ya, but you should have told Okina-san I've never food poisoned anyone in my life. Besides, everyone at the dojo would die for my cooked dishes"

"You know it is not like this." Aoshi replied in his uninterested tone "He just did not wish to impose on you or make you worried with cooking for two more people. Besides, there is a while you have been to Kyoto and Okina wanted to refresh your mind, as he stated himself. Maybe with that, he will try to bribe you into moving there..."

She merely lifted one fine brow at his last sentence. Okina surely had ideas in his mind regarding her moving to Kyoto and raise her child in a "family" environment. However, she did not voice any protest. She turned back and put her hear outside the window, looking at the sky.

"Thunderstorm today..." she stated vaguely.

Aoshi had already moved to the other room to set the table. Eventually, he stopped to follow her look and with an unworried tone, he asked:

"Afraid?"

Megumi laughed.

"Afraid Okina-san will not make it here on time if it really starts raining."

Laying the last pair of hashi on the table, Aoshi glanced at the door. Megumi gave him a puzzled look.

"A carriage is coming. And so is the old man." He cleared his throat.

Megumi lifted both her eyebrows. Those onimitsu skills never ceased to amaze her. She tried hard to listen to anything but it was all in vain. However, as Aoshi had predicted, one minute later, she could also hear the carriage, the horses galloping and then, a cheerful man talking outside.

Moving ahead, Aoshi made his way to the door with Megumi following him. When Okina laid his eyes on the two of them, he was all smiles. He bowed deeply, his right hand behind his back as if trying to hide something. On the other hand, a very large box, still steaming.

"For you, beautiful one." He got his hand from behind him and presented the lady doctor with white roses that enchanted her and filled the living room with their perfume.

"Thank you so much." She smiled widely. "Okina-san, now you will have to tell me how you managed to get such beautiful roses in autumn!"

The old man beamed. "That is top secret, my dear." He blinked one eye at her. "Since I would not like to impose so much on you, I decided to bring food I prepared myself." He informed solemnly, his chest rose with pride. "I've been told wonders about your cooking but I took the initiative to make you taste something from Kyoto, since I believe I will have many more opportunities to savor your cooking in the future. Besides, you are family too, so I hope you can forgive this senile man..." Okina added theatrically.

She chuckled. Of all things Okina was nothing but senile. Then, she invited him to sit whereas she would fetch a vase for the flowers. In no time, she was with them again on the table. The two men had already taken the food from the tall box and put into display on the low table.

Both sat down and Megumi did the same. The first morsel she had made her eyebrows rise.

"It's really amazing, Okina-san!"

The old man gave her his biggest smile.

"Thank you! I made it myself" he swallowed. " Since you liked it so much, I have to tell you that you are more than welcome to have your meals at Aoi-ya."

Megumi smiled.

"Meaning I am inviting you to visit us there really soon, right, young lady?"

She giggled and threw her hair behind her, happy with the invitation.

"You know that" Aoshi said patiently "she cannot travel, old man." He placed the hashi between his lips.

"I am well aware of that, young man." Okina retorted. "However, I suppose she is not staying like this forever, is she?" The older man shot Aoshi a look.

Megumi chuckled behind her sleeve, not letting the men notice she had blushed.

Aoshi merely shot Okina another glance and both went silent. As always, Okina broke the stillness by asking various things about Megumi´s life, her job, the pregnancy… everything.

When dinner was over, both men helped her in the kitchen. She had begged them to leave everything to her but they refused with all their will.

"You need rest, we don't want this little one out here before its time, ok?" Okina said among smiles.

Megumi had realized Aoshi looked tense. Every word Okina said earned his attention and the old man was well aware of that.

Always keeping certain distance, Aoshi eyed the old man and the woman. His eyebrows stitched together with any word that left the old man's mouth. He was pretty sure Okina would do or say something not appropriate… he only did not know when…

"I insist you stay for the night!" Megumi said in a smile, her look shifting from one man to the other.

Because of the heavy rain that insisted to fall outside, Aoshi decided not to argue. He knew that a mere word from his mouth would cause Okina to force them stay anyway. He could even read that in the old man's eyes when he did not protest. Behaving against all odds, Aoshi watched as Megumi led the old man to the meditation room.

Megumi returned a few minutes later and walked to him.

"If you wish to sleep already, the other room has been prepared." She did not raise her eyes to him "I will retire for the night now because I am terribly tired. Make yourself at home, though, Aoshi-san."

"Thank you" he whispered and watched the female figure walk the corridor and disappear through her bedroom door.

When he entered the room that had been designed for him to spend the night, Aoshi felt something inside him. There he saw the cradle and all the things that could belong to the baby. Near the wall, he saw a futon with a blanket carefully folded over it.

Aoshi walked and his fingertips slid on the white wood. He looked at the cradle and a mix of feelings, from fear to happiness passed through him. Soon he would be able to lay his eyes on his child's face, soon, really soon.

When he lied down, he realized he could not sleep that easily. Breathing into that house was affecting his brain. Strong memories, strong stories… he turned to the side and faced the wall, wishing his mind would go blank, as white as the color of that wall.

XxXxXxXxXx

Before leaving the following morning, Okina had woken up early and, making sure Aoshi was not in sight, she approached the gracious woman dressed in yellow. The woman was in the back year, watching her plants and herbs, making sure if they hadn't been harmed by the rain.

"Good morning, beautiful one." Okina said while he walked down the path to the small garden.

Megumi turned away and smiled. Apparently the old man enjoyed waking up really early. She wondered where Aoshi was but she decided to ask nothing.

"Is everything in order with your garden?" he asked.

"Yes, as far as I could see, the rain did not destroy it."

Facing the woman, Okina's semblance got serious.

"I hope that letter I handed you caused no trouble."

"Ah, no, absolutely not" she smiled.

"I hope you do the same I did for her, trust her for she sounded very sincere when she promised there could be nothing in this letter to hurt you."

Megumi nodded told the man her words had even been comforting.

When the old man returned to the house, he saw Aoshi near the door, ready to leave.

Before leaving, Okina wrote the name of their hotel and their room on a piece of paper and told Megumi to call for them whenever necessary. The old man bowed deeply before leaving. Aoshi lingered several seconds in front of the front gate. Realizing Megumi still avoided looking him in the face, he told her goodbye and repeated the words Okina had said to her about calling them whenever she needed.

Once they were gone, Megumi walked back to her room and after making herself comfortably sat on her bed, she pulled the envelope out of her drawers and eyed it carefully. She opened and unfolded the letter, biting her lower lip when she read the first words.

_Onee-san,_

_I suppose you are surprised to have this letter in your hands. I truly ask you to read it and keep my words with you. I open my heart and I hope you believe in what I have to tell you. _

_After years and years of fierce struggle, I have come to see that on the patch I had been tracing my life, there is no way for anyone to be happy._

_This is something I treasure most and s is Aoshi-sama's happiness. My own happiness is strongly linked to Aoshi-sama's one. However, keeping on making the same mistakes for years and years will take Aoshi-sama away from me, hurt my feelings and keeping his smile forever hidden._

_Aoshi-sama spent months away from home: at war and then, with you. Maybe you haven't noticed but by the time he stepped into Aoi-ya, we all knew he had changed considerably during the months he spent away. This time, unlike a couple of years ago, after we met him and saw he was totally changed into someone we could not even recognize as our Okashira, when we put our eyes on him, we realized the shadow into his eyes and it was not for he had become shura again._

_He almost did not meditate this time. He spent the days dealing with the Inn affairs and, during his free time, he used to stay locked into the office or into his room glancing into blankness. Of course I was always around and I could see and understand very well the way Aoshi-sama felt when he received your letter. He read it for days. Also, the day we departed from Tokyo, it was clear he was waiting for someone to show up at the station and for me, it is clear that someone was you._

_The man that was taught to never let his feelings show seem to be losing control of his once unbreakable armor and we can now have a piece of he's inside. He must be really confused with everything since he'd never experienced such in his whole life. I am not talking only about fatherhood nut grandpa and I are almost sure Aoshi-sama has deep feelings for you, not for being the mother of his child but really for you. We do not think he's aware of it yet._

_Onee-san, it hurt me deep to take this decision but, as aforementioned, if I can work on making Aoshi-sama smile and be happy, there is nothing else to life than this. I recognize I am not the one he loves and I will never be. I don't want to be a stone in his path, so I decided to open my heart and abide the love I've kept for years. I will adore him and love him no matter what, only in a different way, a way that will not make his eyes sadden every time he looks at me nor make him feel guilty._

_I am not certain, nowadays, of your feelings for Aoshi-sama, but if you still love him the way I knew you used to, please stay by his side and make him happy._

_I don't feel any bad feelings towards you. I just have come to see you as a part of Aoshi-sama's life and I can't deny or hate it. From now on, I want you to know I show all my respect to you, that is why I call you onee-san, as a sign of my affection and acknowledgement for the person you are._

_Sincerely yours,_

_Makimachi Misao, you onee-chan _

With tears in her eyes, Megumi pressed the letter against her heart for long minutes before folding it and putting it back into the envelope and keeping it into her room. Her head was swirling around the words of the young woman but she could not hide her happiness for having read those lines once again.

xXxXxXxXx

She hadn't heard of her friend for quite a while.

Walking the lanes with long strides, at least, as long as her kimono allowed her to, Kaoru thought of Megumi and wondered how her friend was.

Kaoru knocked but no response came from the inside. She bit her lip and twisted her hands. She knew that Megumi was so heavy that walking was a big pain now. She decided to enter the garden and check the back door.

The wind was cutting her skin as she made her way through the garden. When arriving at the back deck, she noticed the door was open.

With her heart in her mouth, Kaoru flew inside Megumi's kitchen screaming her friend's name.

"MEGUMI? MEGUMI? WHERE ARE YOU?"

Kaoru listened to some noises coming from the corridor and then she listened to a faint voice.

"Here, Kaoru, here!"

She immediately rushed, following the sound of her voice.

Kaoru let go a scream when she found her friend. Megumi was fallen on the floor, her arms put behind her, as if she had been trying to lift herself from that position. Megumi's eyes instantly met her friend's.

"Help me… I feel… my baby…" she showed her wet palms to her friend.

Kaoru tried not to panic.

" Oh, god! It is time, isn't it?" The lavender kimono of her friend was soaked.

The younger woman made her way to help the other, lifting her up from the floor and helping her make her way to her bedroom.

"Come on, Megumi, hold on tight, come, strength in those legs, woman."

Megumi furrowed her bows and struggled her way to the bed.

Kaoru made the shoji open with her foot and carefully helped Megumi go on the bed.

The doctor knew her friend would be of little help that time. She remembered when Kaoru delivered Kenji, she was hysterical and she noticed her friend starting to freak out more and more.

"Kaoru, please, I need you to call Saeko-chan. She is already experienced in assisting births; she'll make an excellent midwife. She lives really near, please, I beg you."

"Hang on, please, my friend". The younger woman frowned desperately and made her way to the streets.

Megumi panted and tried to make herself calmer but the contractions were coming and going in a shorter period of time, maybe it would not take much longer anymore.

Saeko's eyes rounded when a desperate Kaoru finally managed to connect the words and told her Megumi was about to give birth. The girl screamed to the mother she was going out, that the sensei needed her help and she dragged Kaoru by the arm and ran the most she could.

In less than five minutes, Saeko was already into the bedroom, preparing everything and asking Kaoru to fetch all the necessary material for the birth.

Megumi had started tossing and turning and one could point out thick tears in the corner of her eyes.

"Calm down, sensei" the girl wiped the sweat from the doctor's forehead. "Your baby will come out healthy ad beautiful."

Saeko was now between Megumi's legs.

Kaoru was freaking so much she decided to stay outside. Everyone agreed for she would not be of much help anyway.

Kaoru stopped walking from one side to the other when she heard a knock on the door. She ran to answer it and she saw the tall figure of Aoshi and her beloved husband. Before calling Saeko, she had sent a messenger to the dojo to inform Kenshin of the news and ask him to bring the father-to-be.

"How is she?" Aoshi asked before stepping in.

"I suppose she is fine, Aoshi-san… birth pangs have worsened, I believe it won't take much longer now."

Kenshin entered right after Aoshi and hugged his wife, trying to make her calm down. It seemed Kaoru would have the baby or she was the father.

Aoshi made his way to the corridor but stopped before the door. He listened to Saeko's voice encouraging Megumi and the other woman's moans among various different breathing techniques.

He then returned to the living room to stay with Kenshin and Kaoru. The young woman did not even blink, staring at the bedroom door with teary eyes. Aoshi sat down, his elbows over his knees, his hands together under his chin. He did not know if he wanted to listen to what was going on inside the room or if he'd rather clean his mind and stay unfocused.

Kenshin looked at Aoshi and smiled. The tall man was behaving bravely but he could see his nervousness for his legs shook slightly.

"Please, Takani-sensei, a bit more, a bit more" Saeko's voice echoed in the house. Right after, Megumi moaned a bit louder. Aoshi's eyes opened instantly.

And there was silence. Nobody breathed. Kaoru stiffened into her husband's arms and Aoshi did not even dare to blink. Everything seemed to be suspended in the air.

And soon after, they heard a cry. A child's cry.

Kaoru trembled and Aoshi sighed loud enough to earn looks from his friends.

A few seconds later, Saeko's head popped out of the door with a big smile.

"Kaoru, I am going to need some help, if you can come."

"Sure, sure!" she released herself from that protective hug and ran to the bedroom.

Kenshin and Aoshi were left alone in the living room. The shorter man approached Aoshi and tapped his shoulder.

"Congratulations, you are a father now."

Aoshi breathed in and eyed the older man. " I am… thank you."

Kenshin smiled his purest smile to comfort Aoshi, whose voice was clogged with emotion although he tried to disguise the most.

XxXx

Kaoru entered the room and Megumi turned her face to her. Her doctor friend had the biggest smile she had ever seen on her lips. She was smiling and crying… Kaoru did the same. She did not hold the happy tears or her smile.

"If you keep that smile for a second more, I suspect you facial muscles will never come back to normal again."

Megumi laughed. She was so happy she could not describe.

Saeko came to Kaoru, holding the baby. " Wash your hands and clean him, please.".

Kaoru nodded and did as Saeko told her. The girl, on the other hand, worked in removing the bloodied bed sheets and cleaning Megumi.

"The father is outside waiting to meet his child." Kaoru said.

Megumi's heart pumped. " Aoshi? Is he here?"

"Yes, I sent a messenger home for Kenshin to bring him. Kenshin is also outside."

Megumi felt something growing in her stomach and this time she could not say it was due to her pregnancy.

When the baby was dressed and the room was not messy and dirty, Saeko appeared on the corridor and walked towards both men with her biggest smile.

"There is someone inside who I believe you would like to meet, Shinomori-sensei."

Aoshi stoop up, followed by Kenshin's eyes.

"May I come in?" he asked the girl.

"Sure." She smiled.

The few steps he had to take to arrive at the bedroom seemed to be everlasting. Everyone inside could hear him for he was not minding his way of walking. When he slid the shoji open, his eyes seemed to have gone blind.

He blinked several times and then he saw Megumi on the bed. Her smile was giant and beautiful. Her eyes were so bright their light could have blinded him. Kaoru was on the other side holding the baby.

" Are you well? You and the baby?" he asked Megumi as he made his way towards her.

"Yes, perfectly fine." She answered him, always keeping the smile.

For everyone's surprise, he did not walk to see the baby. Instead, he kneeled beside the bed, near Megumi's head. She eyed him in the eyes and a tear fell down and rolled her cheeks when she saw his smile: his perfect teeth showing, his moist lips curved in a smile, a longed smile.

"You…" she said but she did not finish the sentence. His smile turned into a kiss dropped on her forehead. Her hands went to his face and she looked into his eyes for some seconds before her own smile turned into words.

"Go see him, go hold our beautiful boy."

Kaoru still had tears in her eyes because of the scene she had just seen but she made her way to Aoshi and handed him the baby. Then, she decided it would be better to leave them alone.

His big and strong hands seemed unskilled in holding such a small creature. He was afraid to break his fragile son. He breathed in and he felt his face warm. The boy had such a white skin and such black fine hair. His small nose, his small hands, his small mouth. Aoshi looked at him attentively, and the baby stirred into his arms and he opened his eyes. Aoshi smiled lightly when the little boy did so.

"Have you seen?" Megumi's voice echoed in the room. " He has your eyes."

Aoshi nodded and looked at her. " But he looks a lot like you too. He inherited his mouth from his mother."

Megumi smiled and her hands came to her forehead. " I am tired" she stated.

"The name" Aoshi said. " I want you to name him."

The woman eyed him in shock. " Are… are you serious?"

He nodded, still looking at his son into his arms.

"Seishiro… how does it sound for you?" She asked.

"Beautiful and strong." He walked nearer the bed.

"My baby Sei-chan" she opened her arms to receive the baby Aoshi was handing her. She pressed him against her chest and Aoshi seemed delighted to see that scene.

"Himura is also outside, Okina hasn't heard of the news yet."

" And what are you waiting to inform him he's a grandpa now?"

Before leaving the room, Aoshi bowed over the mother and the baby and looked at them.

"I'd never had such a happy moment in my life so far." He caressed the baby and then the woman's face.

The other second, when she opened her eyes, he had vanished.

xXxXxXxXx

Thank you everyone reading and reviewing or just reading. This chapter was dying to be written! ;)


	44. In Motion

Chapter XLIV – In Motion

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer applies.

XxXxXx

When she opened her eyes, she saw him by the faint light of the lanterns. The day had died early for autumn was advancing in haste.

She stretched her body under the covers and realized he had noticed she had woken up. The woman smiled greeting him and, for her amusement, he smiled back. Timidly, but he smiled back from the chair he had been sitting.

"I wonder if I am worthy of your smiles." She spoke in a husky voice.

He looked down and never answered. She could not entirely see his features from the bed.

"And Sei-chan?" she asked

"Sleeping." He answered, moving his jaw forward, indicating something to her.

Megumi then turned in bed, looking at the other side, near the door. And she saw a basket with white fabric and her baby sleeping quietly inside. She turned to Aoshi again, looking pretty confused.

"Okina's gift. He calls it bassinet and he claims it is French."

Her eyes widened.

"Wow… I wonder where Okina gets all of these things."

Aoshi shrugged.

"Is he still here?" she asked.

The man shook his head. "No, he left some minutes ago. I suppose he must be sending news to Kyoto. Anyway, he promised to be back since you and the baby were sleeping."

Megumi blushed. She had slept a lot. The last thing she remembered was naming her baby, holding him close to her and watching Aoshi leave. And then she was knocked out by heavy sleep.

Noticing she intended to stand up, Aoshi quickly made his way to her.

"You know you need to rest." He stated.

"I am aware of that… but… I think I also need a bath." She smiled. "And he needs to be breastfed."

"I can bring him here to you." Aoshi offered. "And then I can help you out with water and on."

"Thanks." She mumbled.

Aoshi walked to the other side of the room and bowed to retrieve the baby from his new bassinet. Megumi watched the scene carefully and pointed the delicacy in which Aoshi touched and held the infant, cradling his head.

"You do know how to hold a baby." She stated.

He looked at her. "Do you think so? I had never touched such a small child in my life. When I met Misao, she was over eight months already, it did not seem she would break if I touched her."

She chuckled and then offered her arms for Aoshi to hand her the little one. She brought him near her skin, holding him with an arm while the other one worked in opening the neck of her kimono.

"I will heat up the water." He said and walked out of the room and she thought she had maybe seen him blush slightly.

Even sleeping, when her nipple was near his mouth, Sei-chan seemed to know what was going on. And she felt his clenched fist in contact with her skin and she got delighted to feel such soft, thin and warm skin touching her. Her heart pumped when, while breastfeeding, Seishiro opened his eyes and seemed to look at her face. By candlelight, his eyes looked darker, a leaden blue. After he was satisfied, he just let go of her breast and moved his arms slightly. She smiled.

It amazed her to see that he would actually hold her finger if she touched his little hands. Megumi brought him near again, his head near her shoulder, so that he could burp.

When Aoshi entered the room, he realized she was giggling low. However, he did not ask and just informed everything was ready for her bath. To help her, Aoshi, put the baby back in the bassinet and offered to carry Megumi until the bathroom.

"If you give me your shoulder to support, it is already fine. I guess some walk to the bathroom won't do me any bad." She responded.

And he did as she told him.

Aoshi quickly returned near the baby and watched him for long moments. He was awaken and seemed to be aware of him around. He caressed him and talked to him. If anyone could watch that scene, though, they would think Aoshi had gone lunatic. But he was only happy. It fulfilled him with excitement to look at that little boy that looked so much like him and held his fingers when he touched him. Also, he seemed to react to his voice, even when he was talking so low only for the infant to listen. Seishiro would move his legs and mouth every time Aoshi's voice sounded tenderer.

He was so distracted with the baby he had not realized Megumi was actually standing near the door. She had just bathed and he only got aware of her presence when the baby voiced and moaned. And then he felt the smell of her perfumed body.

"It seems it will take him a long time to sleep." She remarked.

"And have you eaten?" he asked.

"Yes. Do not worry, I am fine." She walked further and sat on the bed, letting go a breath.

"Pain?" his eyes turned to her.

"A bit…. Uh… breastfeeding, you know? Feels heavy."

"Aa." He turned to the baby again.

"You can hold him if you want." She encouraged him, wondering he might have been hesitant to hold the infant. "Just don't move too much for he has just been fed."

Aoshi nodded and cradled the baby into his arms, walking slowly around the bedroom. It amazed Megumi to see the two in such special contact.

XxXxXx

As days passed by, life seemed to get more and more colorful.

They had visits every day, life was busy.

Seishiro was a very good and calm child. He barely cried, only when he was hungry and when held closer and after latching, he would stop crying immediately.

Everybody was surprised to see how dedicate Aoshi was as a father. He wanted to participate in everything and once visiting, Yahiko joked he would breastfeed if he had a way to. Of course Aoshi hadn't heard that.

Okina had already returned to Kyoto but he paid as many visits as he could. The old man drooled over the baby and he could not stop repeating how happy he was and how cute his grandson was. Seishiro seemed to react pretty well to his grandpa's voice and would pay lots of attention every time Okina giggled and talked to him.

The baby was growing quickly and gaining weight. He was also aware of things around him and he seemed to recognize his parents' voice. He also slept a lot and would sleep through the night almost every day.

Aoshi had decided to stay and help Megumi with the baby during this period. She had thanked heaven for his decision. Although Seishiro was a very calm baby, she surely needed help and Aoshi was doing great as a father.

He was now one month and a half old, growing and getting more beautiful day by day. The baby was lying on his back on the double bed. Aoshi sat near him, watching him after Megumi had sponge bathed him. All dressed in white, he looked amazing. His eyes were getting brighter and he now paid lots of attention anytime Megumi or Aoshi would talk to him.

The infant moved his arms and legs happily when Aoshi touched his feet. Megumi entered the room and sat beside Aoshi, also looking at the baby.

"Hi, cutie." She said and the baby instantly moved his head to her and opened his mouth. She giggled. When she did so, they saw the baby smiled.

Megumi almost jumped from the bed.

"Oh, my! Did you just see that?"

Aoshi nodded.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw, cute little thing!" she laid a kiss on the baby forehead, earning hand movements from him.

She looked at the man and smiled to see he seemed hypnotized.

She heard a knock on the door and lifted her eyebrows, finding quite amazing Aoshi had not warned her he had sensed someone at the door.

"I will answer." Megumi said and left the bedroom.

She opened the door and a chilly wind passed by her and she saw a pair of jade eyes in front of her. The young woman bit her lip and seemed to hesitate.

"H-hi" she finally voiced, sounding extremely timid

Megumi smiled, trying to encourage the other one.

"You are welcome"

And the hesitation in Misao's face disappeared. She smiled back, a giant bright smile. She stepped into the house and shivered.

"It is freezing out there."

With the warmest smile in her lips, Megumi helped her with her heavy coat.

"Has Jiya handed you my letter?" Misao asked, looking down.

Megumi nodded.

And the young one smiled again. "I do mean everything there. We are now onee-san and onee-chan."

"Sure." Megumi answered.

And Misao's head turned to the corridor, Megumi did the same. Aoshi showed up, frowning.

Misao felt her heart in her mouth, her stomach sunk and she guessed everyone had noticed it.

"A- Aoshi-sama"

But then everything seemed to have stopped. Aoshi appeared carrying little Seishiro in his arms.

" OH. My. Dear. Holly. GOD!" and the young woman ran towards Aoshi direction's standing on the tip of her toes to have a better glance of the child.

"He is the most wonderful baby I have even seen in my entire life!" Her eyes shone amazingly.

Her enthusiasm made Megumi laugh.

Misao eyed Megumi and grinned. " I am sorry, onee-san, but he looks a whole lot like Aoshi-sama. Look at those eyes."

Megumi threw her head behind, making her hair float in the air, a smile on her lips. " I am well aware of that."

" Are you in Tokyo all by yourself, Misao?" Aoshi asked sounding a bit worried.

"No." she shook her head childishly. " Jiya is also in town. But I was sooooooooooooooo anxious to meet this cute little thing I came before him. You know, he takes years bathing."

She approached Aoshi with a begging look in her eyes. " Pleeeeeeeeeeease, let me hold him."

Aoshi thought for some seconds and Misao thought she would die in anxiety.

" Just do not move brusquely." He pondered.

She nodded a thousand times and then received the little one into her arms. Her eyes grew wide when she touched him and she could do nothing but smile.

"Oh my, oh my" she repeated time after time.

When Okina arrived, the house seemed full, it felt like they'd been holding a party.

"It is so good to be here again!" the old man walked in.

Everyone was together at the living room. It amazed Megumi to see the scene, they were so close, such a beautiful family portrait. Her heart was both happy and heavy. Misao just would not let go of Seishiro, Okina talked the most he could and Aoshi, sometimes, participated in the conversation. She kept herself busy serving tea and sweets and also talking.

"Megumi, when Sei-chan is old enough to travel, you should bring him to Kyoto! Everyone there is dying to see him!" Okina started.

Megumi giggled. " Deal! In spring, perhaps. Now with winter coming, it is impossible."

Aoshi nodded.

"Everyone is also longing to see you again, Aoshi-sama." Misao added.

Aoshi's eyes shifted to the girl. "Aa…" He actually did not know what to answer. He was not sure, but he thought he had seen Megumi's eyes drop with that question.

" And you too, my beautiful lady." Okina completed. Megumi replied with a shy smile.

The doctor had spent long minutes trying to convince Okina to stay at her house with Misao. Misao played an important role in the negotiations and the old man finally gave in.

Seishiro threatened to start crying and Megumi understood he wanted to sleep. Misao decided it was time to let the little one rest and the mother made her way to the bedroom.

In the bedroom, while cradling the baby to sleep, Megumi heard Misao ask Aoshi when he planned to go back home. She tried to hear his answer, but it was impossible.

Since they were having guests for the night, Misao would sleep at Seishiro's bedroom since the baby was with Megumi. Okina would stay at the meditation room. Megumi realized that Aoshi looked a bit out of place.

"Are you going to stay with Okina?" she asked when he passed in front of her bedroom. He stopped and looked at her through the open door.

"I had the living room in mind. Okina snores quite a lot."

She giggled.

"You can stay here if you want." She said.

He seemed to be willing to say something but she soon added.

"There is a futon in the closet, remember?" she smiled.

He nodded and made his entrance.

Megumi made herself comfortable into the blankets.

Aoshi walked to the closet and opened it. Inside, there was really a futon, a big one. He took it from there and placed it beside the bed, near the door, taking the chance to close it completely.

"Good night." Megumi said.

"Good night." He echoed.

The lantern was beside him and, when he was ready, he put it off.

He tossed and turned for some moments. That futon… the very one in which he had slept so many times, in which his child was conceived.

Misao's inquiry about him going back home was spinning inside his head. He had thought about the subject but the moments he was living with his child were very precious… and there was her. He could not tell how soon she wanted him to go away.

XxXxXxXx

Megumi actually found that having Okina around was really interesting. The old man gave her loads of attention, talked to her more than to anyone else in that house.

That afternoon he had even ran some errands for her. He sometimes managed to get Aoshi out of the house but Misao was always inside, always around little Sei.

She knew they would not take long to go back home. Okina could not be so absent from the restaurant and business. She imagined Aoshi had been away enough and it was probably time for him to follow his path to Kyoto.

She had just changed the boy's clothes and looked at him on the bed.

Aoshi approached slowly. He realized her thoughts were distant. She kept her eyes and her smile for the little blue-eyed boy but he sensed her thoughts were not for the infant.

"What worries you?" he half-whispered.

She jumped.

"Damn it, Aoshi! My heart nearly stopped." She hissed, frowning severely.

He sat by her side, facing her.

"I did not mean to startle you."

Her expression softened. " I know, I am sorry." She turned to the baby. " I was just here thinking of how much he has grown…"

Aoshi nodded.

"It impresses me that day after day, he looks more and more like you… I am starting to think I just lent him my belly…" she suddenly stopped, blushing heavily. Her fingers covered her mouth and her eyes rounded.

"Sorry" she said between her fingers… " I did not mean to repeat that to you, I do not mean that anymore."

His eyes dropped for a second and then, he looked at her again. " You know it is not true." His hand raised and met hers, making her uncover her mouth. His fingers went past hers and brushed her lips. " The lips… they are nothing like mine."

Her lips parted at his touch. She was not certain of the reason, she wanted to say something, protest, whatever, but words would not come out.

"AOSHI-SAMAAAAAA" Misao came running through the corridor and stopped brusquely at the bedroom door.

His hands fell immediately and she moved far from him on the bed.

"Sorry…" she said blushing heavily, running the way back outside.

"You'd better check what she wants." Megumi said, turning her back to him, her hands back to her recently touched mouth.

Aoshi's fist was now clenched. As he made his way through the corridor, he felt the sensation of touching her moist lips vanishing too quickly.

XxXxXxXx

Outside, facing the snow, Okina heard Misao's footsteps. She arrived near him blushing, her expression turning her in.

"What happened, girl?" he inquired.

"Oh, Jiya… I guess I just interrupted something…" she looked away, heavy-heartedly.

XxXxXx

They said they would leave the other day.

Megumi woke up early and saw Seishiro was also an early bird. Before leaving bed, she looked at the other side and saw Aoshi sleeping on the futon. He breathed in so slowly that she barely could notice it.

After breastfeeding, she carried the baby into the bassinet to the kitchen with her so that Aoshi could sleep a bit more. She loved to see he was sleeping quiet, deep and not restlessly anymore.

Seishiro found the tulle of the bassinet very interesting and looked at it for long whiles, his little hands moving frenetically.

She smiled and had her time preparing breakfast. When she was fixing the table, Okina's voice echoed from inside.

"Besides being beautiful, she still prepares the most delicious breakfasts!"

Megumi giggled.

"Come on!" she said.

After greeting the little boy, the old man turned to her.

"Where is Aoshi?"

"Sleeping." She stated.

The old man's eyes rounded.

"Check with your own eyes if you do not believe me." she teased me.

He grinned. "I just cannot believe it! Well, he is getting old!" he stroke his beard. "Uh… I think I'd better see him."

He opened the bedroom door and did not see Aoshi on the bed. He frowned in confusion.

"Breaking into other people's room, old man?" Aoshi asked from the other side of the room.

"Ah, Aoshi!" the old man nearly jumped. "First, I am not breaking into anything, Megumi authorized me come inside."

Aoshi folded the futon and walked away in order to keep it. Okina followed him with his eyes.

"No… do not tell me you were sleeping in the futon… and the bed? Isn't it more comfortable for the lady to use the bed???"

"She is using the bed." He shot the old man a look.

Okina looked mortified. However, he did not want to get any other odd look from Aoshi and changed his expression fast enough by the time he retrieved an envelope from into his sleeve and stretched it out to Aoshi.

The younger man frowned.

"It was delivered yesterday but I forgot to hand it to you. When I remembered, you and Megumi had retired for the night."

Aoshi received it and then opened. His eyes read fast through the lines and he let go a breath.

"Problems?" Okina asked.

"It seems so. I have to leave tomorrow."

"Where to?"

"South. I will go with you up to Kyoto." The young man's eyes dropped.

Okina's expression softened.

"Well, come and have breakfast. Megumi prepared us delicious food."

"No, I have to leave to check some things immediately. I will just wash myself."

Okina observed the other man pass by him, entering the bathroom. He walked back to the table where Megumi was just waiting for him.

"Did you see it?"

"Nah… he had already woken up." He smiled.

The old man sat with the woman to have breakfast together. They soon heard steps coming from the corridor. Aoshi passed by them and she followed him with her eyes.

"Won't you have breakfast with us?" she asked.

"No. I have to leave." He said while adjusting the collar of his coat.

She eyed him, expecting any other word. But he said nothing. He did not even look in the baby's direction, opened the door and left. Plain and simple.

Megumi was rather shocked.

"What was that?" he asked the old man, totally puzzled.

He shrugged. He thought he was not the right person to give her the news.

XxXxXxXx

Aoshi did not return for lunch. Okina and Misao had already packed, sparing the necessary things they would use the next morning.

He also did not return to dinner. Megumi wondered if she should serve it later but she thought of her guests and they needed to sleep earlier that day.

The two guests had already excused themselves and gone to sleep. Megumi suspected Okina knew something but she did have courage to ask him.

She was the only one up, at the end of the corridor, facing the door. She had the little boy in her arms and cradled him to make him sleep.

Suddenly, she heard the door being open. He entered, snowflakes in his hair, a tired expression. He closed the door behind his back and looked at her.

"Aoshi." She rushed towards him. Her eyes looked him up and down. " It is freezing outside, go take a bath while I prepare something for you to eat." She sounded worried.

"It is not necessary, thank you. I have already eaten." He said while removing his coat.

He passed by her and disappeared into one of the doors. She felt frustrated. Not only he disappeared the whole day and he also arrived and did not say a word to her despite of her worried offering.

The following second, the shook her head " Silly." She mentally scolded herself. Seishiro was sleeping quietly in her arms. She placed him into the bassinet and combed her hair before going to bed.

When she had just tied her sleeping yukata, Aoshi opened the door. She looked behind to see his figure illuminated by the dim light of the lantern.

"I am leaving tomorrow." He stated.

Her eyes dropped for a second. "I see."

"There have been issues for the government only I can handle." He approached her.

She nodded, her back turned to him. Closer, he stretched his hand to touch her shoulder but she turned back, facing the bed and making her way under the blankets.

He decided to pick the futon and unroll it on t he floor. Before lying down, he looked at her face, her eyes wide shut. He put the lantern off.

XxXxXxXx

It was still dark when she heard the little boy's brief cry. Instinctively, she jumped from the bed.

A light followed her and his whisper reached her ears.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." She answered. " I guess he is just hungry."

The woman made her way to the child and held him in her arms. Aoshi had lit a lantern in order to help her.

She was right, the boy was only hungry.

Aoshi sat on the futon and watched Megumi feed his son. When the baby was done, she mumbled a song and walked around so that he could sleep.

The little one fell asleep quickly. She smiled at the boy before putting him back on the mattress and heading back to bed.

She lied down but he did not put the light off this time. On her stomach, she moved on the bed so that she could be close to the edge, nearer to where he had placed the futon. She eyed him for some seconds before closing her eyes.

He eyed her back and sighed when she closed her eyes. He finally put the lantern off. However, he allowed himself to smell the end of her hair that kept on falling over the edge.

XxXxXxXx

It was a busy cold morning. Everyone was coming and going, she only watched and helped in what she could.

She suspected time had come when Aoshi came inside the bedroom and shut the door behind him. Megumi turned to him and he stopped a few steps from her.

Again he sighed and then swallowed.

" I don't know how long I'll be gone." He stated.

"I see…" she said facing the floor.

"I will write as frequently as I am able to. The letters, however, will be sent to Kyoto. I do not want you and Seishiro directly involved in these affairs. I beg you to answer them sometimes so I can know how you two are doing, if that is not asking too much. Okina will explain further how communication will be on his later letters."

She smiled although troubled by his words. That job should be something really serious and secret.

. " You do not need to worry, I will surely reply. I am not that cruel to let a man without news on his son."

A long moment of silence lingered between them. His eyes did not look for her or hers from that time on. She thought their conversation was over and he just did not know hot to say the last goodbye.

"Forgive me…" he whispered.

That sentence made her raise her eyes. "There is nothing to be forgiven, you know it."

He half smiled. "Anyway, I wish I could have seen it all earlier… it took me so long to realize, to see what mattered the most to me. If I hadn't been so foolish, I could have been a bit more of what you once expected me to be. And now, once again, I am leaving everything, leaving you alone."

She gave one step ahead and spoke with a soft voice.

"Do not blame yourself. Things happen when they are due. Maybe that time we were not ready for one another."

"I wish I could stay around and watch Seishiro grow… I will miss this part. I fear it is now too late."

Stepping closer, she placed a hand on his face. That made him raise his head and look at her.

"Don't say it like you're never going to come back, like you're never going to look at him again. He'll surely wait for you."

He blinked and nodded. Her hand slipped from his face but he caught it, preventing it from falling back into place.

"And you? Will you wait for me?"

Her expression softened. She thought she had been fooled by her ears, but as he still held her hand and looked like waiting for a reply, she believed it was true.

He feared he had said something he should not. He was leaving, he did not even know if he was going to come back. He let go off her hand. "I am sorry for this". Full of shame, he headed outside.

She did not know what had happened to her. She wanted to speak, but no voice came out. She sunk when he left, but after breathing in, she had strength to follow his path. Okina and Misao came to her in order to say goodbye and she hugged both of them. Saeko had come to help and Aoshi now handed her the little boy. Megumi watched him kiss the boy's forehead before leaving.

Snow was falling outside. He walked out the door and she ran after him, screaming his name before he entered the carriage.

"Aoshi!"

He stopped and turned around.

"Yes." she said with teary eyes. " Always."

He closed his eyes and smiled. She smiled back and watched him go.

It was a cold, dark and snowy morning when he left her. It was a cold, dark and snowy morning when her heart was alight again.

xXxXxXxXxXx

Close to the end…


	45. Losses

Chapter XLV – Losses

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer applies.

XxXxXx

After a couple of weeks, she finally got a letter from Okina. That was the first letter but many more came as months passed. Megumi replied all of them. She learned Aoshi wrote to Okina in codes and then Okina wrote it to her and Okina was also the one to read her letters and rewrite them to Aoshi. The news were basically the same : he informed he was going north into the continent after spending weeks at sea. On her side, she could not help describing each improvement and each feature of her little son.

It was a long and cold winter and she felt lonely .

XxXxXx

It was the first week of spring when Sanosuke walked to her house. When she opened the door, he had that casual look, as if nothing interesting was happening in the world.

"May I come in, Fox Lady?" he smiled.

Megumi pretty much knew the reason her relationship with Sano had grown weaker and distant and it somehow surprised her he had paid her that visit. She offered him tea and sweets but he claimed he was not in the mood for eating.

He asked about the baby and took a look at the boy.

"He's growing fast… and looking more and more like him." Sano said vaguely.

She nodded. That visit was just awkward.

He wandered on her garden, checking the fresh green leaves, the eventual buds that were coming, bathing in the sun before turning to her.

"I am going away." he said uninterested.

Megumi frowned. " What? What do you mean?"

He looked at the grass and then back to her face.

"I am going to stay with my family. My sister is going to get married, someone must take care of that old man and that brat. Besides, I feel my time and inspiration in Tokyo are over."

She did not know what to say. He had come to say goodbye to her. Her stomach was kind of heavy and she did not even know if she deserved such consideration.

"You came to say goodbye."

He walked nearer. " Yes."

They eyed each other for a moment that seemed to have lasted centuries until she broke eye contact.

"I am sorry, Sano… I wish I could have been a better friend to you."

He smiled.

"Come on… I never wanted you to be my friend in the first place. But I am over that matter now. I feel people there need me and I am just going with the flow."

Megumi raised her hand to touch his face for there was not much to say. He closed his eyes and then she hugged him for several seconds. When they parted, he made his way to the front gate and she followed him.

"Take care." She said.

"You too." He replied without ever looking behind.

And she watched him go up the street and disappear into sunlight.

XxXxXxXx

Megumi had thought it over. She had to go back to work at the hospital and could no longer run the clinic. Everone at the hospital had been incredibly kind to her and let her stay months away while her child grew and nurtured. The clinic would take much of her time and she would end up not having time for her baby. Nevertheless, she felt guilty and sorry for that.

Her mouth dried when Saeko entered the living room with a smile on her face.

"Good morning, sensei." She bowed to Megumi and went over the bassinet to greet the little boy.

"Morning." Megumi replied.

"Hello, sunshine." She beamed to Sei-chan and the boy smiled at her. She almost screamed in delight.

Then, knowing she could no longer delay the matter, she turned to Saeko.

"Saeko-chan, please, sit down, we have to talk." Megumi spoke.

The girl stiffened and looked behind, making her way to the table, as the doctor commanded.

"You sound serious, sensei. Did I do something wrong?"

The doctor shook her head. "No, dear, that is not it. That is not it at all."

Megumi raised her eyes to look at the younger woman.

"I'll be back to the hospital tomorrow and I'll have to close the clinic. I am sorry, but if I continue with it, it'll be more than I can take. I talked to Matsuyama-sensei yesterday and everything is arranged for my return. Of course I will still see patients in need, but a regular basis at the clinic for now would be too much. And at the hospital I fell I can learn more, be in touch with new techniques that will help me when I reopen the clinic once Sei-chan is older."

Sakeo lowered her eyes and Megumi could almost see tears.

"That's not all, I am not dismissing you. I do know you and your family need the money and I acknowledge you are so dedicated… so, I also spoke to Matsuyama –sensei and, if you agree, you are starting at the hospital tomorrow too. We have a new group of nurses starting part-time and I have observed how you enjoy taking care and assisting people, I thought it would be perfect for you. And I am going to need someone to watch over Sei-chan every morning… he is already so fond of you and you of him that if you feel like it, I would like to have you watch over him while I work at the hospital…"

As Megumi spoke, the girl's expression changed. At the end, she had a smile on her face. She bowed deeply, her forehead on the floor.

"Thank you, sensei, thank you so much. I am so grateful I do not even know what to say. Being a nurse is what I really wanted to be and it'll be a delight to watch over that little sunshine over there."

" I thank you, Saeko, thank you for being understanding."

"Oh, sensei, you've been always so kind to me..."

Megumi stood up and walked towards the girl and put a hand on her shoulder.

"That's because I know what you are made of and for."

Megumi smiled and went over her to make her straighten up. " I am the one who appreciates it. Furthermore, you are talented, I could not let it pass."

xXxXxX

The rest of the day proceeded with cleaning and removing the placard from the front of the house.

Some people that passed by came to ask what was going on and to say, afterwards, they were really sorry the doctor would no longer run the clinic but they also promised to pay her a visit at the hospital if something happened. Megumi also assured them it would not be forever and as soon as she was able to, she would reopen the clinic.

Next morning, Megumi woke up happy. She breastfed her son with delight, bathed and dressed up as fine as she could. She wanted to look good, to look special for that special date. She picked a pale pink kimono and a white smock to go with her long fine hair and her red lipstick.

Then she gathered Seishirou's things and carried him to Saeko's house. The boys had already left to the dojo and her mother, who had been having some health problems, was by the window sunbathing.

Saeko came to meet them with a big smile and the doctor kissed her baby before handing him to the other woman.

"When you come back, he'll be already home."

Then she made her way to the hospital and, as she walked, she seemed to have butterflies in her stomach as though it were her first day. Technically, it was her first day after a long pause. She guessed she just felt a little insecure.

All the bad things seemed to have disappeared the moment she stepped at the front door. Lots of people from the staff were at the hall to greet her and welcome her back. Her heart pounded with emotion.

The work day passed smooth and calm, only some children with sprained limbs because of the massive outdoor activities since the weather was warmer and warmer each day. The end of the morning came fast and she was feeling her heart small for spending so many hours far from her beloved baby for the first time.

Since it was hot and she missed him much, she took a carriage. Arriving home was like arriving in heaven. Saeko was ready to go to the hospital for her first day and Seishirou looked so happy to see her back as she stretched his little arms and said "Mama".

Megumi stopped dead. Her baby had spoken, she was sure. She held the baby closest to her heart as she could.

"´Mama´, my baby, you just said 'mama'".

Saeko's eyes almost had tears of joy " But he's almost a man already!" she joked.

"Mama" the baby repeated and Megumi's heart overflew with delight. It was time, she thought. He already babbled a lot but only those baby stuff he alone understood.

The two women were in sheer delight, trying to make little Sei say more things, spending half an hour making him repeat his new-found word to their absolute pleasure.

"Sensei," Saeko called, "I have to go… and I almost forgot! There is a letter for you on the kitchen table." She said smiling. Then she bowed to lay a kiss on the kid's forehead. " Bye-bye" she said and waved.

Seishirou kind of waved back with Megumi's help.

Still with the baby in her arms, Megumi made her way to the kitchen. She recognized the handwriting from afar. Yes, it was Okina's.

She sat and put Sei-chan on her lap. Aoshi did not mention his whereabouts, as always, but he informed he was well and healthy and said he was happy to know things were going fine. Then he asked to be informed of the news and wondered how Seishirou would look and how old he would be when the letter was delivered.

At the same moment, Megumi picked up a sheet of paper to inform him ( and Okina) Seishirou's first word. She had made a promise to teach him to say "papa" and "jiya" really soon and thought that they could die of jealousy. She also imagined that when Misao knew Sei-chan's accomplishment, she would write begging to be remembered as well. All of that made her laugh for minutes.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

That was a hot autumn night just as if it were still summer and Seishiro cried. The baby, usually so calm, was sick but Megumi knew it was more of his teeth coming out, besides the heat, of course. She took, however, all care of him she could so he would not to get dehydrated and lose much weight. Saeko had stayed till later than usual and helped her much.

She carried the little boy all around the house, trying to make him calmer but she wondered he would stay up till all hours of the night.

"Mama, mama" he moaned in his mild fever.

She now understood better the desperate mothers that came in the hospital with the sick infants. She had treated babies so many times but it hurt twice as much to see her own baby suffering.

" I am sorry, little one, Mama is doing all she can." She watched as the boy opened and closed his sore eyelids.

She held the baby close to her body and walked around the house. Looking through a window she kept slightly open for ventilation, she saw the clouds hasting and thought about a storm coming.

That day she had had an awkward conversation with Matsuyama-sensei at the hospital.

The two of them had been free for almost an hour and were having tea together. Matsuyama- sensei, who had always been talkative and cheerful, stared at the bottom of his cup for several seconds before bringing in a new subject.

"Megumi-sensei, I think we here could not thank you enough for bringing Takakura-san to us. She sure is a gem of a girl."

Megumi smiled. "Of course she is! I think she has what it takes to be a good nurse or doctor, although tending to people and making them feel more comfortable fits her better than prescribing medication, from what I could see."

Matsuyama-sensei kept on looking at the bottom of his cup with a smirk on his lips. Megumi found everything so unusual she could almost laugh but she restrained her instinct not to embarrass the other doctor.

She sighed in relief when Sei-chan quieted and eventually slept for she could barely walk around anymore, tired she was. She suspected the dawn would break soon since she could already listen to some birds chirping outside.

Megumi was half asleep on her bed, an arm crossed over Seishirou's body when she heard a knock on the door. It was almost painful to open her eyes, she had laid to rest only a little while ago. She observed there was light already but could not precise what time it was. Although lightly, came another knock. Megumi got up and headed through the corridor to open the door and find a much anguished Saeko. Before Megumi could say anything, she let out a zillion tears.

"Mother, sensei, mother!" she sobbed.

Megumi pulled the younger woman inside and closed the door behind them. " What happened, Saeko?"

"I- I don´t know, please, please, come with me, I-I... think... mother's dead."

Megumi´s eyes rounded violently. "What?"

"I don´t know what to do, I thought of asking Matuyama-sensei´s help because you had to take care of Sei-chan but I had no idea where to find him at this hour. All I could do was to think of coming here, sensei. I am sorry, I know you might have had a tough night yourself because of Sei-chan... Is he better?"

"Yes, he is, he slept at last. And you don´t have a reason to apologize, I would have wanted you to come for my aid and would be upset if you did not... but tell me what happened."

Megumi rushed inside her bedroom, Saeko crying behind her. She took a glance at Seishirou sleeping on the bed as if nothing was happening. At the same time, she washed her face and tied her hair in a bun, changing her yukata for a kimono in a really short time. While Megumi changed, Saeko walked from one side to the other.

"I woke up, early as always to do the chores before coming here. You know mother´s health has always been frail, she complained once or twice of not being able to breathe properly but she blamed the heat for it. So I went to check on her, since she is an early bird as well and give her her pain medication. When I opened the door, I found mother twisted on the futon, her back to me, I thought it might have been of pain she was feeling. When I touched her, I felt her arm was hard ..." Saeko stopped in the middle and swallowed " her hand was cold and her eyes and mouth were open."

She cried a lot while Megumi took Seishirou into her arms. The boy protested but he eventually slept again against his mother's chest. On their way to the door, Saeko grabbed Megumi's medicine box and the two of them rushed the streets together.

"Where are the boys? Are they awake?" Megumi asked.

Saeko shook her head, tears flying in the process. " I just ran out here to get you."

When the two of them arrived at the small house, Megumi heard noises coming from the inside. When Saeko opened the door, one of the twins rubbed his eye and spoke.

"Saeko-chan, I heard you leave in a hurry..."

When he realized Megumi's presence and his sister's crying face, he got alarmed.

Megumi passed the sleeping boy to Saeko's arms and ran into Saeko's mother's bedroom. The woman was stiff and the colors were fainting already. Megumi crouched near her: she was not breathing, there was no pulse and she guessed, by the look in her face and position of her hands, squeezing the fabric of her yukata in the middle of her chest, it might have been her heart.

Saeko closed the door and Megumi could listen to her outside talking to her brothers. Now the other one, Masanobu, had also waken up. They asked constantly what was wrong with their mother and Saeko only answered they should wait for the sensei.

Megumi winced. It had been always difficult for her to deal with death. She was a healer after all. She wanted everybody to overcome everything and keep on living... only that it could not be possible all of the times. And now it was even more complicated since she knew the deceased and had a close relationship with the family.

She closed the woman's eyes, arranged her on the futon and covered her so that the boys could see their mother in a more suitable way to their eyes. Then, she straightened herself up and opened the door solemnly. All eyes turned to her, she could tell. Saeko turned to her and she stretched her arms to welcome Seishirou that was still drowsy, but had waken up. Her eyes and Saeko's met. She closed her eyes in response and nodded. Then, Megumi stepped aside and retired to a corner.

Saeko sighed and then inhaled as if to gather strength and all the air she could. The boys looked at her with sheer exasperation.

Saeko walked to the boys and passed one arm around the shoulder of each one of them.

"Boys, it is going to be you and me from now on. Mom passed away." she tried to speak without crying so she could be strong for the boys.

The two boys looked at her as if they weren´t able to understand what she was telling them. Only when the first tear rolled down her cheek, the boys seemed to have been freed of some sort of paralysis.

"Is Mom dead and gone?"

Saeko nodded and then led the two of them inside their mother's room.

Megumi could hear them crying and crying all over again, Although morning was hasting, she had no courage of leaving them like that to mourn. She sat quietly on the corner, nestling a restless Seishirou that kept on munching on his own little hand.

After several minutes, Saeko left the room accompanied by the two crying boys.

"You were here all along, sensei?"

Megumi just nodded.

"Mom is going to be in a place where she will no longer be in pain, sensei." Masanobu informed her in a sweet voice

"And Saeko-chan told us she will be with dad too." the other twin, Shuuichi, completed.

"I have to provide the funeral and burial." Saeko said.

"I can watch over the boys, Saeko-chan." Megumi offered.

"Oh, no, sensei, I've already imposed so much on you today."

"That is no problem at all." she sounded calm and then turned to the boys. " Come on, boys. I'll just drop by the hospital on our way."

The two boys obediently followed her. By the time she got to the hospital, morning was at its peak and Seishirou cried a little because of the heat, she imagined.

One of the nurses frowned when saw Megumi carrying Seishirou and holding hands with the boys.

"Good morning, sensei,"

"Good morning. Iori-san, is Matsyuama-sensei available?"

The man nodded and indicated her the way. Megumi proceeded with the boys at her side. At the designated room, she knocked.

"Yes?" came the reply in the familiar voice of Matsuyama-sensei.

It is me, Takani Megumi, sensei." Megumi made her way in.

Matsuyama was with his back turned to the door, but shifted his position the very moment he heard the door being open. He looked at Megumi and could read it all over her face something was very wrong. Furthermore, she was carrying Seishirou and two twin boys he was not acquainted with followed her in.

"What happened?"

"I was called very early in the morning by Saeko-chan, sensei. I went to her home and attested her mother's death. She is providing the funeral and burial. These are her little brothers, Shuuichi and Masanobu."

Matsuyama shifted his eyes to the boys and managed to smile amidst all the bad news he was listening to. The boys eyed him back with blank expressions.

"But what bad news! I suppose Saeko-san is in pieces. We all knew how devoted she was to her mother."

Megumi nodded.

"You do not have to stay here, Megumi-san. I myself am going to provide all support I can. Where can I find Saeko-san?"

"She will be thankful, sensei. And I am as well. I will take a carriage and take the boys to my house while everything is being set. I believe you will find her at the shrine, down the alley, four blocks from here. Her mother was a believer and used to go there."

The man doctor nodded. Then he accompanied the other doctor to the door and watched her get into the carriage with the three boys.

XxXxXxXxXxXx

The funeral and burial were attended by a rather large amount of people. Although very sick and nearly disabled the last months, Takakura Mao was very dear to her neighbors and to her former employers. She had worked hard to raise three children after her husband's passing and had always been cheerful and optimistic.

Megumi had gone in Yahiko, Kenshin and Kaoru's company. Sei-chan and Kenji had stayed by the dojo under Tsubame's supervision. There she met a whole lot of the hospital staff, Matsuyama-sensei included. She was told he had helped Saeko set the ceremony and the burial, also with the legal steps. Saeko and the boys were all very close to one another, as if they wanted to become one person. At the end of the afternoon, when all light had turned to gold, Takakura Mao was buried with her husband and people started to dismiss after the condolences.

Megumi, Yahiko, Kaoru and Kenshin decided to stay until the very end because Megumi had decided to offer them to spend that first night at her house. She thought it would do no good for them to be alone in such a painful moment.

An old woman, walking with the help of a cane, came near Saeko. She eyed the girl for a good minute before speaking.

"I am sorry for your loss. You mother was a very brave and honored woman. However, as your landlady, I am obliged to ask you and your brothers to leave the house as soon as possible. I never charged your mother for living there, but her passing changes everything."

Saeko frowned. "But, but... I, I think I can pay the rent... at least we can talk about it and.."

The old woman interrupted. "Listen, young lady, I don't want your money... or the money you think you can make. Unlike your mother, you are taking a path not suited for women."

The frown got deeper. Saeko asked the boys to stay with Yahiko, far away from the words and when she thought they were at a safe distance, she answered.

"I- I don't understand you, lady. I.."

"You think you are better than the other girls around here. We are all poor, but honored and we know our places. You changed since you started having ideas you could be a doctor! A doctor! Leave it to men! Our girls here work, of course, but as maids, as sewers, we do not intrude in a world that is not ours. Besides, you are in a age you should be getting married. And because of your behavior and new found "profession", everyone finds it hard you will ever get married. What husband would like a working wife, moreover one that thinks she is or is going to be equal to men?"

Saeko was so taken aback she did not know what to answer. She just opened her mouth but no sound came.

"Of course nobody never mentioned anything to your mother, that poor thing, in fear she would suffer more being so frail and goodhearted. We all pitied her... I expect you to understand and leave the house as I demanded. My condolences on your mother's passing once again."

Megumi and the others listened to what the old woman was saying in absolute shock. She stepped forward to stand up for Saeko but the old lady gave her a glacial look before she could say anything and finished her speech, leaving surprisingly fast for an old woman with physical problems.

Saeko's eyes filled with tears. Megumi and the others approached her that very moment and Megumi held her. Saeko hid her face away into the doctor's hair.

"I... I.." Saeko tried to speak.

Kaoru stood by her other side and put a hand on her shoulder. "Come on, Saeko-chan. You should not let yourself down because of that woman's words..."

Megumi stroke Saeko's hair. "I was just waiting here to ask you and the boys to spend the night at my house. You know I have plenty room for you three even more now the clinic is closed."

"Sensei, she asked me to leave the house, no matter if I paid the rent..."

"Shh... I heard, I am sorry... that is why I must extend the offer and ask you and the boys to come and live with me; we can provide the moving tomorrow. Let's just go there and pick some clothes and personal items... I won't take no for an answer, it is already decided." she tried to calm the girl.

"I am sorry you had to listen to that, you all. It was humiliating and the way she spoke and it was about you as well, sensei... I... I did not know what to say at the time because it sounds terrible to me. And I cannot..."

"Oh, you will definitely go with us, girl!" Kaoru smiled. " Didn't you listen to your sensei saying she won't take no for an answer? And neither will Kenshin and I. And everyone here knows that old woman was full of prejudice and all wrong. I bet she will forget her words by the time she needs you or one of our brave ladies at the hospital."

Saeko opened her eyes and lifted her head with a sad smile on her lips.

"I would not dare to say no to you. I would say I cannot possibly think of better friends to have."

"You are not a friend, Saeko-chan. You became family." Megumi assured her.

They all walked away in the fading light. At night, after everything that had happened, there was the sweet smell of food and the soft sound of voices dying out inside Megumi's residence. The rain she had predicted the night before finally hit late that night when everybody had gone to bed and nobody could witness and ask it to take all pain away.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Heavy little chapter, uh?

Ok, there will be just one more chapter to go, I suppose, two at most . I could not thank you enough for reading, supporting, reviewing and sending me messages asking me to finish this fic. I replied promising I would and I am on my way to doing it. Thank you, thank you very much. I'm not sure if there is someone out there still reading it after soooo many years, but I do pray so. Anyway, you'll read from me soon and I hope to have done it properly. I am rusted, you know :)


	46. One Winter's Night

Chapter XLVI – One Winter's Night

Until The Dark

By Larissa Hyuga

Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer applies.

XxXxXx

Aoshi read every word that was written in the letter telling him of the changes that had passed the last months. Now he could not answer anymore. He even wondered if reading those words were healthy. He was extremely far away, up north, in a land summer never seemed to hit at its full. Winter could freeze one to the bones and it usually did. His chase up the mountain had cost a couple of lives from both sides. He had once sworn to fight evil and he knew he was fighting evil this time and evil for many reasons, some private and others not. And even if he could leave everything and just go to where he thought he belonged, it would take him a real long time anyway.

He looked around his tent. He knew it would be the last time he was under its canvas and it gave him mixed feelings, if he could call it that way. So up high in the mountains, he could see the snowy tops just ahead of him even though spring was making everybody smile the way down.

The former Okashira imagined the toughest part was now behind him and his few men. Up there in the mountains, they had already known the whereabouts of whom they chased and the news, for them at least, were better. The cold, the intense winter and the siege had made the enemy grow weaker but there could still be surprises.

" I believe they are out of danger. I have heard no words of enemies spotted. I can now only hope you are as well". That was how Okina finished his letter.

One of the men entered the tent and Aoshi raised his eyes to look at him. He was young and thin, one of the guys who kept their smile even so far from home and under such conditions. He heard, from the tent, that the men gathered in the nights they were allowed to make a fire and sang in a low voice songs to take them, to take theirs hearts home, to make them warmer, also warmer inside. He never took part in those moments. He always stayed inside the tent listening to the men, watching the fire flickering through the pale color of the canvas. He guessed everything would stop if he stepped outside and he thought he had no right to spoil his men tiny bits of what he figured as joy and loneliness together. Now going upper and upper, they did not sing as often, perhaps for they received no more mail.

"Shinomori-sama" the man bowed "everything is ready. If you command us, we shall leave in half an hour."

"Aa. May it be so." Aoshi agreed.

The other man bowed again and made his way out.

Aoshi kept his letter inside his pocket, grabbed his sheath and also walked out the tent. Immediately, two men came inside in order to disassemble it. Everybody waited almost restlessly. If everything went like planned, they would be a day closer to their homes and if they were lucky enough, it might even start being something real that very day. It was a very bright early morning and the wind was blowing.

In exactly half an hour they departed to their final part of the mission. The path was rough and it took them two hours walking up to the cave almost completely hidden in the mountain. Aoshi led the entire group up to the assigned point. From that moment on, he and three of the men would go inside the cave, a pair of the others would surround all the spots they had already discussed before to make sure nobody would leave and go past them: there were twelve men for that purpose.

From what he knew, he expected to find no resistance for the others´ strenght had been mined. Men had gone down the mountain to surrender themselves, claiming their master had gone mad. He expected to find the master and two or three men, at most. They were disbanding after their criminal business was dismantled and many men thought it would benefit them if they turned themselves in and provided information about their master's whereabouts.

Aoshi unsheathed his blades and was followed by the other men in the action as he stepped inside the cave. That very moment, the smell of decay stung his nose and he flared his nostrils.

"Ow" moaned one of the men behind him. "dead people inside."

"Which makes our job easier." Another one chuckled in a muffled way and Aoshi guessed he was covering his nose and mouth at the time.

"Shh." Aoshi frowned, trying to make his vision adjust to darkness. It was very easy to track the corpse by the smell, he thought. As they walked, the smell was fouler and eventually he could spot some light. It also felt a lot warmer than at the entrance. He soon spotted two men on the floor, one on the top of the other, like a small pile, obviously dead. He told two of his men to check the dead men and carry them out of the cave.

Looking farther, by the fire that was starting to die out, he saw another man sat on the floor, his back leaning against the rock walls.

"At last." The man spoke in a rather faint voice and his lips curled in a smile.

The last man that followed Aoshi rushed in order to get to the man at the bottom of the cave, but Aoshi blocked his way with his outstretched arm.

"No. I'll deal with him."

The man was dressed in rags. His shirt that once had been pure white, expensive and fancy was soiled, bloodied, torn. The same thing for his pants. He sat with one leg bent and the other stretched. The stretched one had an ugly, deep and swollen cut: the flesh around it was already black and rotting, a fractured bone, Aoshi imagined by what he could see from where he was standing. The man had a tangled beard and wore glasses with cracked lenses. His black hair looked greasy, tangled and filthy. He closed his sore eyelids and turned to open them before waving his hand to Aoshi.

"Come closer and put an end to it." He laughed a weak and demented laugh. " You have wanted it for years. As you can see, I won't put up a fight, I have no way of doing it and my gun" he pointed to a revolver thrown on the floor a few steps from himself " doesn't have a single bullet in its cylinder. I spent them on those two useless shitty guys you have already came across."

"Takeda" Aoshi hissed, his eyes only blue slits reflecting the dying orange of the fire. Aoshi told his man to get the gun. He man examined it and nodded to Aoshi, saying it was true, all the bullets had been spent.

"For a long time I wondered how the government had managed to track me down. But then I just heard who was now working for the them and I knew sooner or later this day would come. I had imagined a different outcome, however." Kanryuu sighed.

Aoshi could see he was shivering and his skin, the closer he approached, seemed to look greener. Fever, he thought, he is being consumed by the fever.

" That woman," he swallowed, " you know I have always kept my grudge against her. And you can't imagine how my jaw dropped to know of your association. I could have killed two birds with a shot. Or three, with the little boy, since you are now a happy family… or perhaps not so happy, huh?"

"Hush" Aoshi got really near him, one sword pointed at Takeda's throat. " Don't you dare speak of them with this filthy mouth of yours."

Takeda laughed. Aoshi saw no fear in his eyes. Takeda was challenging him, checking him, testing him, trying to get to his softest spot to make him lose his mind.

"I understand the game you are willing to play, but I am afraid you will have to play it alone." Aoshi retreated his sword and sheathed both of them. Then he crouched near Takeda and gave a long look at his leg. " Your leg is in a really bad condition. You will die anyway, you know it. I am not going to be the one to deliver you mercy and shorten your wicked life. The sadistic in me prefers to only sit back here patiently and wait… not that it is going to take much longer."

It took all his strength to widen his eyes. Takeda's eyes rounded red, as two pools of blood. " You have always wanted it, come and kill me at once… or have you gone butter-hearted?" he laughed again and choked on his laugh, coughing afterwards.

Aoshi did not move a muscle. The other men came from the outside and he merely made a move with his head as a sign of dismissal. He imagined someone could have wanted to kill Takeda, the last man there, so they could resume that mission, it would be much easier. Although his hate was big, he refused to dirty his blades and his hands with that wicked man, with his poisoned blood. He was not worth it.

Aoshi told his men to gather and go down the mountain with the prisoners they had made days before. At the base of the mountain there would be a camp and from there on they would receive further instruction. He did not want to keep the men any longer. He, however, would wait. Two of his men also volunteered to stay guarding the entrance of the cave.

Kanryuu Takeda drifted between deep slumber, delirium and moments in which he would tease Aoshi into killing him just to go into slumber once more. She shivered, sweated and moaned. After noon he worsened, he could barely open his eyes. He would sometimes mumble things that were not making any sense. In the very end, he shivered violently and moaned.

"Kill… me… kill mmmm" he left the sentence unfinished and then everything fell into absolute silence. It was not absolute darkness for Aoshi had fed the little fire. The afternoon was turning golden.

Takeda was finally gone. Aoshi walked to the entrance and saw the two men sat. They stood up immediately and read it in Aoshi's look, rushing inside in order to collect the body. He would have wanted to let him right there, but all bodies had to be taken to the base in order to be identified.

The way down was almost merry. Everybody was in good spirits and the farther they got from the top, the louder the conversations got. They could already see the chimneys working at the base and the weather was clearly more pleasant. It was practically a party the moment they set their feet on plain ground. They were greeted with enthusiasm. Kanryuu and his men were still behind drug and gun dealing and with him gone, the government expected to have enormously minimized the problem.

He noticed the men were already making a line in order to have letters written and sent home. There were a couple of cabins among the tents and one was designated for him. He made his way in and, after closing the door, he sighed. Now came the paperwork. But before all of that, he grabbed a sheet of paper and wrote "mission accomplished". At the bottom of the page he wrote in a bigger handwriting: "I am going back home."

XxXxXxXx

Megumi liked to have her house full of people. She had been so reclusive and lived alone for the most part of her life and she imagined that could be the reason why she liked to be around other people so much.

Despite their mother's passing, the twins and Saeko did not let that break them down. They were cheerful children and she was such a lively girl. Half a year had passed since they had moved in. The boys kept their daily routine at the dojo, Saeko continued at the hospital working as a nurse, not caring for her old neighbor's comments.

Megumi had a great time at the hospital. And the greatest joy of all was to see her little son growing up: a quiet child he was, but also lovely and curious. He kept his big blue eyes focused on whatever drew his attention. Megumi realized he was very fond of plants and animals. He had started walking and now even rushed all around the house, played hide and seek with the boys (in a simplified version, though) and laughed merrily every time one of the boys found him. It was easily noticeable Seishirou was a mix of them both, of her and Aoshi. His blue eyes and his quietness would never put his fatherhood in question. On the other hand, his very pale skin, his merry laughter and his friendly way of acting around people could only have come from his mother's side.

It was evening, the boys had returned from their practice and had just bathed. Seishirou sat quietly in the corner of the kitchen having great amusement with a wooden horse . Megumi was just finishing dinner.

Saeko entered practically running through the back porch into the kitchen. Megumi and Sei-chan looked at her at the very moment. Her hair had been messed by the wind, her cheeks were rosy from a clear rush of blood to her face. She stopped, her back on the door, gathered herself and her breath.

"Good evening, sensei." she bowed her head.

"Good evening, Saeko-chan." Megumi eyed her in suspicion. " What happened to make you come in like this?"

Saeko blushed even more and ran a hand through her hair.

"I am sorry, it is that I ran away." she said in a voice that conveyed both a chuckle and a whisper.

Megumi's eyes narrowed. "Ran away? From what?" she said while walking to Seishirou to carry him to the table in order to feed him.

Saeko smirked. She watched Megumi sit down with the little boy in her lap and star to feed him dinner. The doctor never broke eye contact with her, however. Saeko sat across the table, right in front of Megumi.

"Matsuyama-sensei." she said in half a whisper.

Megumi froze in the middle of the process. She just came to when Seishirou protested, his mouth had hung open, then his little hand made its way to touch her hand, reaching for the hashi with his food. Megumi looked at the little boy:

" Sorry, sweetheart, here you go". Sei-chan opened his little mouth to happily welcome the onigiri.

"From Matsuyama? Why? What happened?" Megumi turned to Saeko looking puzzled.

The younger woman lowered her eyes. " He proposed to me."

Megumi had to gather a whole deal of strength not to freeze again and earn another protest from her son. " He did?"

Saeko nodded, her eyes stuck on the floor.

"And what did you say? How did that happen?"

"Oh... I never saw it coming, I think." Saeko said vaguely. " And I did not say anything. I ran. And you pretty much witnessed the rest."

Megumi frowned. It came as a surprise, but if she thought it over, Matsuyama had already made some remarks about Saeko before... and the way he stood for her when her mother died did not seem so disinterested now she heard what Saeko had just said.

"But you can´t run away forever. Just imagine if he knocks at the door right now!"

That made Saeko rise her eyes, as round as the bowl Sei-chan was eating from.

"No... I mean, I havent´thought about him coming here..."

"But have you thought about his proposal yet?" Megumi arched a brow.

Saeko placed her palms on her lap and spent long minutes looking at her own hands. "It is not that I don´t like him. He is gentle, cheerful, supportive... I think he would make a good husband ."

"What about love?" Megumi leaned forward, " isn´t love supposed to matter here?"

"Love, sensei? I have long given up this idea of marrying for love. For years people have married for other reasons than love and so many of them have gotten to know love afterwards if both of them are willing to make it work. I believe he is willing to make it work although I guess there is no love involved. Maybe it is because of my condition and I have to take that into account. I have no money, two younger brothers to raise, my family condition is uncertain. Matsuyama-sensei could be a sensible option, like he said it himself. He loves children, I would not need to part with my brothers, he lives in a big house... and I always remember the words my previous neighbor said, I have to face prejudice for I decided to have an occupation."

Megumi could almost sigh. That girl was younger than her and saw life from a much varied point of view. She had refused to marry if not by love but Saeko made a good point since love alone is not enough to keep a relationship. She could open her mouth to protest, to say Saeko should only marry a person she loved but when she came to think of the girl and of Matsuyama's personalities, she saw they would match well. Both of them were calm, soft-hearted and soft-spoken, comprehensive and had dealt with the same sort of adversities. They were not fire, they were air :light and constant. Then she smiled to the girl.

"You are making your point. If that is what you decided, I can only support you and feel happy for you."

Saeko smiled back. " I was afraid and scared when he spoke to me, but as I came home running, the idea of having him as a husband seemed to be a good one for so many reasons... and love can come with time. I believe there is no way not to love someone that does you good, ne?"

Megumi nodded. " Indeed. Now I suppose you will have some announcements to make. First to the man who is interested and possibly puzzled by your reaction.. then to the little men back inside."

XxXxXX

Matsuyama had spent all his days with a giant smile on his lips. Everyone at the hospital seemed to cheer as well. Of course, the two of them were such great people, they deserved to be happy, to try this newfound happiness together.

The boys, at first, were afraid they would be left aside and out, but Matsuyama made sure to let them know they were more than welcome and they relaxed more and more as the ceremony day approached. Two days before Matsuyama had come to gather Saeko's and the boys' belongings in order to place them at his, now their, house.

The night before, Saeko could not sleep. She was so anxious Megumi wondered if she was not already in love. Matsuyama proved to be easy to love, that she knew. And every flower he offered her made her smile greater until she beamed constantly.

Megumi helped Saeko dress her wedding clothes and helped her with her hair and light make up. The boys were already dressed and waiting in the living room along with Sei-chan.

"I am so nervous..." Saeko said as Megumi pinned her hair. Megumi smiled.

"Of course you are, it is your wedding day." she finished the hairdo and Saeko stood up, looked at the mirror and smiled. The last step was the placement of the _watabōshi_ over her hair.

"Thank you, sensei, for everything. I will always be grateful."

"I am the one to thank you and to say I am going to miss you and the boys greatly. But I also feel extremely happy for you are setting your own path and your own happiness. You truly deserve it all."

Saeko tried not to cry that time.

"And do not cry! Your groom will think there is something wrong then!" she teased, earning her a laugh from the other woman.

"And you will be happy too, sensei, I know it."

XxXxX

Matsuyama was wearing a black kimono, the montsuki, with grey hakama. Saeko was all in white, from head to toe in a shiromuku.

The procession ended up at the groom's state where the reception was now being held. Since both of them had no parents anymore, their friends were invited to speak.

Then, there was the toast. Everyone giggled happily, ate and drank, the newlyweds smiled so much Megumi thought their facial muscles would crack. After the candle service was performed, there was the flower presentation. For Megumi's amusement, Saeko and Matsuyama walked towards her, bowed and offered her the flowers.

"Since mother and father are gone, sensei, " Saeko said "Who else could I give this flowers to if not you? Take them as a sign of acknowledgement for raising me to what I am today."

Megumi felt her eyes start to sting. She bowed her head and accepted the flowers. People around clapped their hands.

After that, the guests started waving goodbye. When it was her time, she hugged Saeko affectionately and told Matsuyama:

"You'd better take good care of this girl and make her happy or you´ll be facing my wrath, are we understood?"

Matsuyama tilted his head and laughed. "I would not be that crazy."

Megumi returned home with a smile on her lips and a little boy sleeping in her arms. She got out of the carriage and walked the garden to enter her house. And she would be left alone again, she thought.

When she opened the door, she saw an envelope had been put under it and inside her living room. Before retrieving it, she walked to the bedroom to place Seishirou on the bed.

She bowed in order to get the envelope and when she opened it, she instantly recognized the handwriting.

" Mission accomplished." it was written on the top. On the bottom she could read ; " I am going back home."

Her heart jumped. It was Aoshi's. She skimmed the front of the envelope for a date and realized that letter had been sent over a month ago. She suspected he would return really soon: she only did not know if he was going to Tokyo or Kyoto.

XxXxXx

Okina had also received the note. He smirked. He imagined Aoshi had left Hokkaido the other day after preparing all the paperwork he was supposed to. Knowing Tokyo was closer to Hokkaido and that Aoshi was coming by sea up to Yokohama, he decided to meet his former pupil there.

Arriving in Yokohama he made contact with some of his old friends, some ex-Oniwabanshuu, and it was not that difficult to know the ship Aoshi was in.

Now he was at the harbor, watching people come and go and waiting for Aoshi's arrival. He sat calmly on a crane he used as a bench very near where government men also waited. He also knew the younger man would be held up in Yokohama at least for the day since there was a meeting scheduled for that evening. He watched as the ship approached the harbor and the government men made their way towards the point where the ship would anchor. Okina watched the men gather around the people that came from inside the ship.

Aoshi was the tallest among them, so he could be easily spotted. Besides, he was the only one not displaying any emotion for the fact they were back to land and closer to home or that the mission was successfully accomplished. His expression only altered a little bit when he narrowed his eyes the very moment he saw Okina. The old man threw his head back and smirked.

Okina watched Aoshi dismiss the men around him with nods and several "Aa"s. Then he made his way to the old man, his brows slightly arched.

"Quite a surprise."

Okina beamed. " Really? I did not notice so."

Then he put his hand on Aoshi's shoulder: "It is good to see you coming back after so long again."

Aoshi nodded. Not that Okina expected a smile or warm words... but a nod would just do fine. Aoshi was still Aoshi after all, even after having adjusted.

"How are things in Kyoto?"

"Ah, pretty much the same way you left them." Okina stated vaguely while they walked towards the street to enter a carriage. " When are you coming back?"

"To Kyoto? It may take a while. I have pressing matters to attend."

"In Tokyo, I supposed."

That sentence earned Okina a frown, but Aoshi's expression relaxed . "Aa."

Okina tried to hide a smirk " Very well then. I belive you´ll head for Tokyo tomorrow, then."

"I have meetings to attend for the day and the dinner tonight. Tomorrow I will have nothing else to keep me here . I plan on taking the train at noon."

"I know, boy. But I am seeing you again tonight at dinner. I was also invited." he smirked.

"Naturally. You were in the middle of all of this all along." Aoshi stated before entering the carriage and waving goodbye.

Okina would catch another one. Since he did not have so many meetings to attend for he did not have to report anything, he had a day off and decided to enjoy the city. But first he had a final mission to accomplish: make sure to have a letter delivered that same day to a young lady living 50km away.

XxXxXxXx

"Mama, man."

Megumi raised her eyes to the gate. She was at the garden collecting dry leaves and Sei-chan was also there, sitting by the porch. She saw a man standing at the gate and he spoke when he noticed she had seen him.

"Letter to Takani Megumi".

Megumi stood up, cleaning her hands on a piece of cloth she had beside her and walked to the front gate to receive the letter. The man handed it to her, bowed slightly. She thanked him and turned her back, walking back to the porch while her eyes skimmed the envelope. It was Okina's handwriting.

" _In case you are interested, Aoshi is in Yokohama this very moment. I have just met him and we will meet again in the evening. Tomorrow he'll catch the train to Tokyo at noon for he has __pressing matters__ to deal with."_

Megumi read the old man's words several times, stopping at the underlined words. Aoshi's words, of course.

She finished with the plants and carried Sei-chan inside.

"Papa is coming back" she smiled at him.

His blue eyes met hers. " Papa?"

"Yes, my love. Mama has always told you about Papa, remember?"

The boy nodded hesitantly. Megumi guessed it was because he was probably trying to locate the image of "Papa" in his mind.

She covered him with kisses, bathed, fed him and took him to the bedroom. That time the little boy was already drowsy and it was never trouble making him sleep.

Every time she thought about the letter, her heart raced. She also bathed and checked the house just to have something to do for she knew it would be hard to sleep. Eventually, she gave up and went to bed, all lanterns were off but the moon was shining at its full form so she could still see things in the dark. She lied on her back, eyes wide open and stuck on the ceiling, she waited for sleep to come. Then she grew inpatient with herself.

"Baka" she whispered and shifted to her side, forcing her eyelids to close and sleep to come.

XxxXxXx

Megumi spent the morning running errands, cleaning the house, doing the shopping for she needed to make herself busy.

In her mind, she could not stop scolding herself, but it seemed her mind and her body would not agree on that matter.

It was a beautiful day for it was still the beginning of winter and the sky was very blue, the sun was shining but the wind was blowing chilly and she knew days like those tended to turn to ice afterwards, as if the heat wanted to say goodbye for a while. She combed Seishirou's black and fine hair and finished dressing him. As always, he looked at everything attentively and she loved the way he gazed at things, the way his eyes would blink whenever he had a question.

"Party, Mama?" he pointed to the new clothes he was wearing.

Megumi smiled, taking the boy from over the bed and placing him standing on the floor. He looked like a fine little man in that royal blue hakama and creamy kimono.

"You are going to see your Papa today after a really long time, sweetheart."

"Yes!" he answered promptly.

Megumi laughed, took the little boy by the hand and left the house. Somehow it was a little bit of a party mood. She was glad, she suspected Aoshi would be glad to see them. It was a new welcome after a series of goodbyes.

XxXxX

Aoshi had woken up early to finish whatever business could have been left unfinished and to make sure he would follow with his plan of getting the train at noon.

From what he knew, Okina would go straight to Kyoto and he somehow felt relieved.

"I hope you can settle your pressing matters, Aoshi." the old man had said the previous night, after dinner, when they both said their goodbyes at the inn before each one of them had left to their rooms. Okina would go back in the first hours of the morning.

"So, I think we'll meet in Kyoto later on." Okina continued. " And make sure to write. I wish I could go to Tokyo myself to lay eyes on my grandchild and his lovely mother..." he sighed " but I´ll be a busy man these days. You rest well. And behave: you have been almost two years away, take your time."

Aoshi felt relieved because he imagined things with Okina would be more difficult to him. He was sure the old man would try to play the matchmaker and it was not what he needed at the moment. He needed to make his peace at last and he needed to do that by himself.

He cast his last glance over Yokohama through the train window. He would get to Tokyo in the middle of the afternoon. However, every minute he spent inside the train was like hours and it seemed he would arrive faster if he had just walked all the way up to Tokyo.

When the landscape started getting too familiar, he felt something grow inside of him. He was anxious, but that only he could tell because he kept his eyes closed, his nonchalant behavior. When the station approached, his mind told him to jump from the seat and get off. He, however, was good in controlling his urges. He grabbed his bags and made his way to the platform.

It was a golden afternoon, he saw. The wind was starting to get chilly, but the light the sun was casting was of pure gold.

On his way to the exit, he almost stopped dead on his track, his heart doing the same in his chest. First, he saw her, her face, her shoulders, bathing in the golden light, dressed in yellow, with her long black hair floating around her, as if she were a statue of marble and gold. Then, as the people were leaving and he could see her entirely, he saw she was taking the little boy by his hand and he made the same impression of his mother... but he was of marble, gold and sapphire.

Aoshi swallowed when he realized she had already spotted him. Of course he was easily seen, a tall figure dressed in black. She smiled broadly and he could feel his blood rushing. The three of them stepped ahead to meet. Aoshi's eyes wandered from the woman to the boy until they were close enough.

"Megumi... Seishirou..." he collected his voice to speak as he placed the bags on the floor.

Megumi smiled more. " We pay our promises. Do you remember I said we would wait for you?"

He gave them a shy smile. " You did. Literally. It was a surprise, a good surprise, though."

Megumi crouched beside the boy that looked at Aoshi with curiosity.

" This is Papa, my love. Go give him a hug."

Aoshi crouched as the boy approached him and threw his little arms to him. He welcomed the little one in his arm and laid a kiss on his head, smelling his fine hair.

"I´ve missed you, little boy." he said in a whisper. The boy lifted his head from Aoshi's chest to look at his face.

Aoshi could not help but give him a full smile. He definitely looked like him. His blue eyes seemed to have been carved in sapphire and lit with stars.

Megumi stood up and watched the scene almost with tears in her eyes. It looked like father and son were recognizing each other. Sheishirou couldn´t stop looking at Aoshi's face and she could see Aoshi's lips welcoming a smile that was getting bigger and bigger.

Seishirou put his head on Aoshi's chest again and Aoshi stoop up, carrying him into his arms. Seishirou shifted and stretched his little hand to touch Aoshi's face.

Aoshi closed his eyes to receive the cherished touch and it seemed his chest would burst the time his little son spoke in front of him for the first time.

"Papa." Seishirou said slowly, as if he were learning the meaning of that word.

"Son." Aoshi said in a low voice, his eyes stuck on the boy's face, enjoying the way the word sounded to his ears.

Seishirou blinked several times and smiled at the man, earning him a smile back. Then he withdrew his little hand from Aoshi's face and shifted to the side looking for his mother.

"Mama" he called, his little hand stretched to her, although the other still rested on Aoshi's shoulder.

Megumi came nearer and held his little hand. That seemed to amuse the boy the most. He giggled the moment Megumi touched his hand and he grabbed her fingers.

"Mama." he looked at her. " Papa." he looked at Aoshi.

Then Megumi looked at Aoshi and she could not help giggling as well whereas Aoshi smirked.

"Thank you for coming, for bringing him here... how did you know I would arrive today?"

"i received your note saying you were coming home. Okina said you were coming today because of pressing matters."

Aoshi arched his eyebrows. " I should have known it."

"I believe his intentions were the best." she chuckled.

"Aa. And here I am after so long." he said vaguely, his eyes shifted from her to the sky.

"Are you going to stay here at the station the whole day?" she inquired, a smile on her lips and arched brows. She was teasing, of course.

Aoshi frowned a little, he did not expect her tease all of a sudden. In fact the last times they had been together everything was so heavy she never teased and he thought he might have been not used to it anymore.

She threw her hair back and half turned her back to him, stopping in the middle to turn her face and say:

"Ok. Unless your pressing matters are really urgent, let's go home. I think I might start to freeze soon." she continued teasing.

She watched as his features relaxed and he looked down.

"Home." he echoed her in a very low voice.

Megumi was aware something was going on his mind. She retrieved Seishirou from his arms so he could get his bags.

"Sorry if I said anything inappropriate."

He lifted his blue eyes to look straight into her cinnamon ones. " What you said was far from inappropriate. You know they say home is where your heart is , so... I am definitely home."

He felt his face burn the moment he said the words and prayed she did not realize he had probably blushed. She just beamed at him and her smile seemed to have made the sunlight go black. The little boy looked at him as if waiting for him to join them.

"So, let's go, the carriage is waiting. And welcome back home."

xXxXxXxXx

During the ride home, he had a thousand scenes going through his mind. Megumi sat across from him with Seishirou on her knees. The little boy took his time hiding in his mother's hair but smiling at Aoshi, stretching his hands and waving to him in order to draw his attention when he looked too distracted.

Megumi asked him random questions about how his train trip had been, if Yokohama was still as enchanting as she remembered. He answered them vaguely.

There, locked up in that carriage, she was so close, so close.

In his mind, they would enter home, he would place his bags on the floor and he would kiss her the very moment she closed the door behind her back and he would tell her everything he was gathering courage and strength to say for such a long time. And he would kiss her again, and sink his hands in her hair, and slide his hands through her face, aiming to recognize her features and he would not let her go until they were one, until the morning light would come again.

In his mind he would say the right words and she would say what he wanted to hear until no more words were necessary. In his mind.

In real life, they left the carriage and entered home. The temperature had dropped several degrees as the evening approached, Megumi rushed inside, shivering.

The house was just as he remembered, warm and cozy. His eyes wandered all around and his heart felt at ease. Seishirou entered running.

"Careful, little one!" Megumi's voice came from behind.

The boy sat in the middle of the living room and got a pile of toys. His eyes went directly to Aoshi and he stretched one little hand, closing and opening it.

"Play, Papa."

"I think Papa would like a bath first, Sei-chan." Megumi said as she made her way to her bedroom. " Would you, Aoshi-san?"

Aoshi was drawn to Earth that time.

"Oh... not now. Why spend time if all I want is to recover time I spent away? Soon he'll be asleep, I want to have this time with him. I'll play with you, Sei-chan."

And he sat on the floor by the boy's side and the boy clapped his hands in sheer joy. Megumi spied over her shoulder from the hallway and smiled at the scene.

She changed and went to the kitchen to prepare dinner. From there she could hear Seishirou squealing and, for her complete surprise, she heard Aoshi laughing.

"Oh, so that is how his laughter sounds." she thought.

It was already dark outside and cold too, she imagined. She popped her head out of the kitchen door and called.

"Sei-chan, dinner."

And she surprised the two of them during Seishirou's flight. Aoshi was holding him high, making him fly high in the air with a great smile on his lips and getting squeals and giggles from the boy. Aoshi stopped the moment Megumi spoke, to Seishirou's disappointment. He pulled Aoshi's sleeve to make him play again but Aoshi carried him to the kitchen instead.

"It is time to eat, Sei-chan. Everything on its due time..." Aoshi said.

Being the obedient and disciplined child he was, Seishirou did not voice a protest, just pouted.

Megumi retrieved Seishirou from Aoshi's arms.

"You may bathe now while I feed him. When you are done, so will be dinner."

Aoshi just nodded as obediently as Seishirou. He walked to the bathroom slowly, retracing his steps inside that house.

He let go a moan the moment he sank into the tub so good the contact of the hot water with his skin was. His body gave him the hint he was tired, but his mind was restless, he just wanted to make up for the time he had to be away, he wanted to have all quality time in the world with his son, he wanted to talk to Megumi, he did not want night to come and go, he did not want to sleep so that day would not slip into past. He wondered what would have happened if he had stayed, if he could take back his bad deeds, his unspoken words and the ones he spoke as well and go back in time to fix everything.

He left the tub, dressed and went to the kitchen to find Megumi by the table with Seishirou in her arms.

"He always gets drowsy after dinner." she smiled " And I believe today he will sleep like a log after the full day and all."

Aoshi sat across from her and started eating. The boy noticed his presence and opened his eyes to look at him and smiled.

"Papa..."

"Papa is having dinner, sweetie. " Megumi said in a whisper, rocking the baby in his arms.

Aoshi just watched the two of them during dinner in an awkward silence sometime broken by Megumi's voice singing a lullaby.

"This time I spent away" he started, making Megumi raise her head to look at him. "I was chasing Takeda".

Her eyes rounded and she stopped rocking Seishirou for a while. " Takeda? Wasn't he dead?" she said in half a whisper.

"That was what he wanted everyone to believe. He escaped from jail during the fire, ran away to China to reestablish his drug dealing. One former Oniwabanshuu told Okina, Okina got in touch with the government and as soon as I knew about it, I knew I had to stop him."

"But... you could have left it to the government."

"Am I not working for them? Besides, Takeda had his eyes on you again. So, it was also a private matter to me. We followed his track all over the country, in China and eventually trapped him in Hokkaido, corned in a mountain area. Many of his followers disbanded, sold us information, died and in the end there was a siege and we got him."

Megumi swallowed, slid a hand over her son's forehead and asked:

"What was made of him?"

"You don´t have to worry, he will not bother anymore." Aoshi said in a deep low voice.

"Is he... dead?" Her eyes were two chocolate brown pools stuck on him.

Aoshi nodded and he listed to her sigh.

"Did you... did you kill him yourself?"

" I did not have to. He was already dying when I reached him. It was just a matter of waiting. He wanted me to give him a final blow, but I would not stain my blades nor my hands with his blood... or I would not be able to do this..."

Aoshi stood up and walked near her, bowing afterwards. She watched him come closer and closer.

"May I?" Aoshi offered himself to cradle his son.

"Sure."

He got the boy into his arm and he opened his eyes, eyeing his father with great curiosity, trying to raise his chest. Aoshi pressed him against his own chest and cradled him, humming another lullaby.

"I will bathe then." Megumi informed and left to the bathroom, biting her lower lip. " It is good to know Takeda is no longer among the living. It is an awful thing to say, I know, but it's really what I feel".

Aoshi followed her with his eyes until she was no longer in his sight. He walked towards Seishirou's bedroom, swinging a little to make the boy sleep. He remembered he had done that a couple of times with Misao when she was little. But he was a child himself that time. Now everything was different. When he thought the boy was in deep sleep, he placed him inside his cradle and stayed watching him, totally lost in thought until he felt the smell of roses in his nostrils.

Megumi approached the cradle by the other side, looked down at the sleeping infant and stretched the blanket over his little body. She had a towel around her head and dressed a pale blue yukata.

"Will you stretch the other side, please, Aoshi-san? The day was beautiful but the nights are getting longer and colder."

"Aa."

He also bent over the cradle to help her with the blanket. He made sure to stretch the hem over the little boy's collarbone while Megumi was doing the same. And his fingers brushed hers. She stretched her fingers hesitantly and raised her head to look at him.

"Megumi, I lo..."

"Aren't you tired?" she interrupted him and circled the cradle going towards the door in long strides . " Your pressing matters... I..."

"No." he held her forearm as she passed by him earning him a puzzled look from her and preventing her from continuing the sentence.

"Sorry." he said, delicately letting go of her arm as he realized she had winced. " I must talk to you... today. That is my most pressing matter."

Her other hand covered the spot he had touched on her forearm and she lowered her arm. " Sure." she mumbled because she felt all the tension they had left behind almost two years ago rise again wherever it came from.

She remembered their last conversations hadn't been very pleasant. She wondered if any of that kind of conversation he wanted to engage had ever been pleasant at all.

"My hair is wet... if you don't mind doing the talking while I tend to it."

Aoshi shook his head. "Not at all." and followed her to her room.

Once again he was seeing things in his mind when he entered the room right after her, inebriated by the sweet smell of roses and of soap that came from her. He watched as she retrieved a comb from the dresser and sat on the bed. She eyed him as if she were a corned animal. He let out a sigh.

"This time I have to say everything I mean to say." he looked at her. " And, please, don´t be afraid of me, I am not here to hurt you. I promise this conversation will actually be a conversation. I have no intention of letting anything unspoken".

That seemed to make her relax a bit. Or not... she really did not know what to expect, she just felt her stomach sink inside of her.

"I wish I could have done things differently, from the very beginning. Or that at least I had taken the opportunity to fix things earlier and not after leaving you so many times and coming back to leave you again, to make you cry... I understand I stepped on your feelings for me, probably having damaged them for good".

He took a step closer.

"Last time we spoke, there were so many things I left unsaid, things I already knew and felt but did not have the voice to say. I never knew how to deal with feelings because I did not learn so. And a leader might not have weaknesses such as feelings. Only too late I found out feelings might not be weakness, they may be strength too."

He took a deep breath and Megumi had hers suspended, she looked at him from behind her wet bangs.

"Since that day I left, I could not take my thoughts of here. I wish I could come back every day, I dreamed of you, of Seishirou contless times . I longed to be with you two more than anything. I saw you so often in my dreams it seemed I had never left and in my dreams I could say, I could show all of me to you... only to wake up alone and miles away. Actually, I had already felt this way since I was in Kyoto before Seishirou was born. I used to read your letters dozens of times in hope your words could bring us nearer somehow".

Megumi just listened. She tried to say something but she gave up in the middle. She stood up and walked to the dresser to lay the comb back where it belonged. " You... you don´t have to blame yourself for things that happened in the past." she said. " Believe me... I trapped myself, there is nothing to forgive you..."

Aoshi drew near her, she could see his reflection right behind her on the mirror. Hesitantly, he placed a hand on her shoulder but she did not turn back to face him.

"I... I want to be with you, with Seishirou, to watch over you, to protect you, to watch him grow up, to play with him... to be part of your lives. I told you my heart is here... it had been here for a long time, only did I not see it before . I was afraid, afraid to admit, afraid to lose myself... but I did not see I was not lost... I had found something to cling to. Since the time I saw you today I had a collection of thoughts in my mind, I was dying to be alone with you..."

He was now so close she felt the warmth coming from his body, inviting her to turn, to throw her arms around him...

"I ask you for redemption although I am well aware I have no rights of asking you anything. Yet, I do. I ask you to let me know if your feelings for me have died... as a man. Because mine for you have grown so enormously I seem out to be too small for it and then I thought if this is not love, I am sure I was born really doomed to never love anyone in my life. I love you, Megumi. I thought it over and over and I can only think this is love that I have felt for you all this time."

He placed his face right beside hers so she could feel his breath on her cheek, his cheek against her own, his both hands on her shoulders.

"I have loved you for so long, most ardently, and I will love you forever if you allow me so. My heart is already yours, my soul, my body my thoughts, my words, all my love..."

He did not have the courage to raise his eyes to look at her face at the mirror. She, on the other hand, had her eyes wide open, as if in shock and then she closed them the very moment her right hand went up to her left shoulder and covered his then he lifted his head and looked at her reflection in the mirror.

"You... I thought I would never hear these words from you."

She turned to face him with a sad smile on her lips. He frowned, fearing it had been too late.

"You don´t know how much I waited... I had resigned myself to being alone... at least until the time I saw you... I was also afraid, but how can I not love you even more when you open yourself to me? Time, life have brought you to me and how can I turn my back to you? How could I refuse it?"

He bowed his head, his eyes closed and placed his face once again beside hers, his nostrils smelling her hair, his skin feeling her skin, her words going deep into his soul, her lips too close to his ear.

"How?" she continued in a husky whisper " how can I say I don´t love you and that I am not dying to love you and love you..." she kissed his earlobe " and... love... you".

He kissed her fully on the lips and,at the same time, he moaned as if had been free from a great weight that lingered on his back. He clung to her body as if he were drowning and only she could save him.

His heart was beating so fast he thought she could hear it, that it would jump from his chest. He dropped several kisses on her jaw line, making her smile and sink her fingers to the roots of his black hair.

He could kiss her all over, passionately and repeatedly. The light coming from the lantern drew patterns on her white skin, but these patterns grew fainter and fainter until the light was off, until the complete darkness of the night hit the two of them, but they did not bother to light the lantern once again. The full moon was casting light inside the room and casting their shadows on the walls.

XxXxXx

Eventually the night gave place to morning light and Aoshi thought part of his thoughts came true just the way he had imagined, just the way he had dreamed so many times before. He could not let her go because he was somehow afraid it would be another dream. He tried his best not to give in to sleep not to have her taken from his arms, not to find out that bed, those words, those kisses and all were not real. He was tired, however, and fighting against sleep proved to have been in vain. She had slept much before him, nestled in his arms and he had encircled her, receiving the warmth of her body on his own, staring at her face as she slept only to fall asleep in the end.

When he woke up, he did it almost in panic, not knowing where he was, his heart beating fast, but all his fear was dismissed when she stirred into his arms and he held her close, to feel her flesh, to smell her hair and make sure they were still together, that they did not lose each other in the dark of the night.

He got up and glanced through a small slit on the window to see everything around them was pure white, the first snow had come. He imagined it should be very early in the morning yet, the house was completely silent.

His skin crawled and he picked his clothes in order to dress them.

"Hmmm, I feel cold". Megumi said in a rather drowsy voice as she stretched on the bed before gathering the blankets to cover the skin that was showing, her shoulders, leaving just her nose and eyes out.

Aoshi turned to her and smiled while fastening his belt. " Good morning, my love." he said the words slowly, tasting every letter. "First snow has come... and I think I was not dreaming of yesterday and I am not dreaming this time." he gave her a significant look.

She giggled under the covers. " No, you are not... I am not." and shifted to lie on her back.

As he buttoned his shirt, he arched a brow to her, a smirk on his lips.

"Since it was not a dream, I suppose I will have the time to do what I want to do with you."

Megumi's eyes rounded. Was that Aoshi teasing?

"And after I am done with it, you will never be the same." he bent over half of her body, his chin rested on the top of her knees,his palms on the mattress, his shirt half-buttoned, his eyes a pool of blue partly veiled by his bangs, as if she were the prey he was stalking.

"Oh, my... now I am afraid! What is this you are going to do to me you haven't done before?" she teased back, uncovering her face to let him see her teasing smirk.

He quickly went upright, his fingers working on the last buttons of shit shirt and looked at her with an expression of disapproval of her teasing sentence.

"Marry you, of course! I never ask something for the second time, so now there is no way you will disagree on the matter because I am not asking. I am stating I will marry you".

She had an outburst of laughter.

"If these are the terms you present, I think I don't have the right to protest."

He arched his both brows ,reassuring her she had just stated the obvious.

Then she closed her eyes and sighed, turning to raise her eyes to him and shrugging since she had no escape.

"Aye. Anytime you want, Okashira."

THE END

YAY! The end, the end, the end. Finally, after so many years. I want to thank each one of you that has read this unworthy fanfiction, the ones that followed me through the years, that reviewed, that sent private messages, that asked me to go on. Thank you, thank you, each one of you have been really important.

I believe I answered everyone through PM, except for asga who was not logged. Asga, thank you, you see, I made it to the end!

I beg you all forgive the typos, I am using a new writer and the correction does not seem to be working all the time.

I had imagined a lot of things going on, but I didn´t want to delay the end anymore, it would not be fair with the readers, with the story and with myself, so I did the best I could and I hope I pleased you with this happy ending. Half of this chapter was written while I was listening endlessly to Christina Perri's A Thousand Years and it was so nice to feel the muse growing inside of me again.

Once again, because it will never be enough, thank you for your support and I hope I'll read from you and you´ll read from me around. ;)


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